Every Other Freckle*

That extra sleep was nice. I went to bed at midnight brain time, not Daylight Savings Time or un-Daylight Savings Time, I don’t even know which it is, so an hour early anyway, and then got woken up early by the man on his way to work, but that was OK, because it was actually later than when I usually get woken up. Tomorrow, I will have to get up early if I want to eat or drink anything before like 1:30 PM…I’m still debating that one. Fasting for 6 hours. Sigh. I’ll decide tonight, I guess.

My grades aren’t done. I did a lot. I got side-tracked by having to essentially write a script for my guest teacher for tomorrow. I have a script for the pilot, so I just structured it for them to hopefully be able to handle. We’ll see how that goes. The other two days I’m absent in the next week or so, I was able to make it kid-managed, so all the guest teacher has to do is make sure they’re on task. Tomorrow, they actually have to know how to teach on some level. Could be awful.

I think I’ll grade one more assignment tonight and then finish up in the morning. I just want to get as much done as possible before I go to Boston (and yes, I’m still hoping to go to Boston…I’m ignoring the alien in my gut as much as possible)…or I can grade stuff on the plane maybe. We’ll see. It’s hard to sit still for 6 hours, trapped, and not want to get work done, when you know if you don’t, you’re going to come back to it in huge stinky piles.

I’m in a new notebook for my weekly planner. I had to transfer a bunch of stuff over yesterday, including making a November calendar…apparently I forgot to do that the week before. November kind of snuck up on me.

Yup. There it is. A week off.

I need that. Here’s a baby lizard on the outside of the front door. Odds are it’s in the house now.

Sleepy Calli with a toy.

So yesterday was lots of grading and delivering a quilt and dinner with the parents, now that they’re back home, and then finally into the office for more of this. Ironing is taking a really long time on this piece. I’m in the beginning of the 400s and I am 8 hours in. That’s like double what it usually takes.

I’m blaming it on my trying to make some things realistic…like above is a mule deer. That’s a lot of fabric for something that’s about 4 inches square. More importantly, it’s a lot of searching for the right fabrics for something that doesn’t take up much room on the piece. I’m convinced it will be a good thing in the long run.

The plus is that I finished all the background landscape last night and I’m ready to start on the figure. Picking flesh is faster…use the same 7 or 8 fabrics for a huge swath of the piece. So the next batch of ironing should go faster. Notice there aren’t many bright colors yet…that should change in this section. There are lots of fabrics though. That’s for sure.

This is a picture of the Quilts=Art=Quilts exhibit at the Schweinfurth Art Center in Auburn, NY. There’s obviously some choral thing going on…and my quilt is on the wall, back right. It’s the first time I’ve seen it for this show.

So that’s cool. I just delivered another piece for a show that opens in December. Also cool. And Power of Women went up in the last few days at IQF Market in Houston, TX. Looking forward to seeing that in photos as well, since I won’t be going to Houston myself.

OK, so my goal for this week is to finish ironing pieces to fabric. I can take a pile with me to cut out in Boston. IDK if it makes sense to do that, but I can do it anyway. Worst case, I cut out next week and start ironing it together…see, I don’t know if I have enough time to finish it if I wait that long. We’ll see. I’m not going to stress about it yet.

But for now, I need to go to school and find all the shit I need to teach today. That’s first on the list.

*alt-J, Every Other Freckle

Yo. Universe. Listen.

I’m in between major to-do tasks at the moment, trying to decide what to do next. I have an errand to go out and do…they put me on insulin on Thursday and prescribed this pen thing, but apparently it needs needles, and those are also prescription. But they didn’t give me that prescription. And the pharmacist didn’t say anything about needing them when I told her I had never used this pen before and could she explain it (she didn’t). Sigh. Not impressed at the moment. Anyway, I have to go get needles now, but I’m waiting for the prescription to process. Meanwhile, whether my pancreas or my gall bladder or some alien who has taken over my innards is the problem, we don’t know yet. Waiting on blood tests and an ultrasound, which I will be missing school for, but it can’t be helped. It does mean I’m really scrambling this weekend, trying to finish grades and replan the week so my students can do stuff without me. Maybe. I barely understand this unit myself, having never taught it before, so this is a bit of a clusterfuck, but we’ll get through it. Hopefully the guest teacher knows something about science. Ha! They rarely do.

Interrupted by the girlchild. Her replacement phone is defective. From the last replacement phone. So I’m on the phone with AT&T, negotiating how not to pay for any of it, but get it there in time for her to do a phone interview. OK. Not on my to-do list.

So my stress levels are through the roof. I’m surviving by making lists, checking things off, and trying to get some art in at the end of the day just to keep me sane. And petting furry beasts. They’re good. Here’s one.

This is NOT one. This pumpkin was left in my classroom and I did not want it to mold over the weekend (it’s about 90 degrees here), so I brought it home. In the car. Yes, now I have beads all over the damn car. Why? Because I forgot to put the head’s seatbelt on.

I was grading things last night. I am greatly looking forward to the National Park Project from this kid.

Really. I’m thinking it will be completely riveting.

Grades are due Tuesday. I’m not getting everything done by then.

This quilt may not get done in time. But that bird is done. It’s a tern. Or a plover. I’m thinking the tern.

I also did the water and the sky. And then it was bedtime.

Mostly. I’m not even in the 200s yet. I seriously thought I would be done by the weekend, but life, school, health, and a stupid field trip got in the way.

With Katie gone, Calli can wander around with toys in her mouth again. She’s happy.

And this one was happy too.

Mommy’s foot.

OK, so I have to go get needles, finish grades, figure out how to hang a quilt that I’m delivering tomorrow, plan for the school week, write two sets of sub plans, finish the warmups for the following week, probably find a jacket for next weekend, maybe learn Swahili. Because I don’t have enough to do. Hopefully solve this gut problem before I go (that would be nice). I got the fasting blood tests this morning. They will show whether it’s the gall bladder or an alien. Much as I’d like the alien, just for the interesting interactions that might come out of the encounter, I’d really like it to be something solvable and easy, preferably non-surgical. OK? Universe? Listening? Thanks.

Really Hopefully

Not much to say about yesterday except that it’s done and that’s a good thing. The actual visiting of the zoo was fine…it always is…a handshake from a koala here…

I always take a picture of these plants. They are awesome.

A pelican eyeballing me here…

This cat…apparently the male across the way had a bone and she was pissed.

Not that I blame her.

And this guy…I’m always troubled at zoos by the cages, the spaces in which we put animals.

He wanted out.

The parts on either side of the zoo were difficult. But they’re done. And then the doctor’s visit was interesting. I’m waiting on blood tests and an ultrasound appointment (I have no idea how I will fit that into the next two weeks, but whatever). I’m not dying. If it hurts more, I’m supposed to go to the ER. Oh. OK. And grades are due. And I’m flying to Boston next week. And and and. It will all work out. But I’m off that crazy medicine that’s been driving me nuts for months and now, after 16 years plus of being diabetic, I’m going on insulin. So there’s that. Kind of anticlimactic. I need to write an ode to my failing pancreas. And possibly my gall bladder.

At the end of the day, late to my stitching meeting, halfway between dead exhaustion and disappointed tears and just overwhelmedness, I got a beautiful sunset. Those of you living in San Diego know that it was even better than this as time went by, and my phone camera could never capture all of it, but it was a good thing…

The universe smiling down and saying LOOK. You survived it. It will all be OK. Just hold it together.

I’m doing my best, universe.

At stitching meeting, I photographed after Julie had put her baby sweater away, but here’s my never-ending road, further along, and the other Kathy trying to figure out her house pieces for the most current Sue Spargo piece, which I have not even started and probably won’t until 2022. (I’m not showing anything finished! Just pieces! You can’t show finished things until she releases the book…and this one is totally calling to me, but I can’t start it until Folk Tails is done!)

I came home. I spaced out. I went to bed. This quilt is nowhere near far enough along. I can’t worry about that. Today I grade and teach and run some errands that need running and deal with a parent meeting and hope the rock in my upper abdomen doesn’t turn surgical (it shouldn’t) and take some breaths and maybe get some shit done so that my head stops spinning. And really hopefully, I iron tonight. For hours.

Finally a Walk…

It’s early. For me. I’ve got a morning meeting and then we’re taking 260 kids to the zoo. I’m ready to be on the field trip and then done with the field trip. I’m ready for the totally cranky kids to be left behind. Oh wait, I mean, they just don’t come to school because their parents let them control that shit, so then I don’t have to see them or listen to them. Not that I accidentally left them somewhere. I am chaperoning a group of kids that I barely know, which is fine. I want to see some animals and get outside and hang out instead of teaching and trying to explain why you can’t hand your money in at the last minute. Which reminds me, I don’t think we paid for the buses yet. Hysterical laughter.

Yeah. Well. It’s that time of year, apparently. This year has been difficult so far.

Meanwhile, I managed to make it home and walk the dogs…usually a Monday task, but this Monday was a stay-late and figure-shit-out day. So that didn’t happen.

It was Katie’s last day with us (it’s only been like 49 days, so…). In fact, as we were walking, my parents were landing. This was not their plane. Well, it could have been their plane, but probably not…

We were chasing daylight…but no sign of coyotes this time.

Of course they were there. We just didn’t see them.

We all needed it. Puppy on my foot afterwards.

After dinner, I worked on the wonky road a bit. It’s really wonky now. Whoops. I might need to move the center line…

Whatever. Cat on my chest…didn’t last long.

Because I wanted to do a little of this…at least a bit. Calli came with me. I ironed a heron and some grasses.

I didn’t get far at all. Although I’m finally done with the first 100 pieces…

Sometimes all you do is 41 minutes of art and then it’s bedtime…because I knew I had to be up early and I have a long, tough day today.

One pro of Katie leaving is the dogs get their toys back (Katie eats them)…this was an exciting moment for all…but mostly for the dogs, who missed their toys.

Katie only managed to eat one of them. That we know of. Now we have to negotiate the toy hallway in the dark. A dangerous sport.

OK, it’s a survival day. Head down, deep breaths, don’t forget to eat and drink. Good advice for many days and situations.

Magic Wand

Hello Halloween…on the one hand, I love dressing up (I’m Dr. Nefario from Despicable Me this year, while surrounded by minions)…my catch phrase is “Do you want to exPLOOOODE?”. Which seems relevant. Tomorrow, we take 260 kids to the zoo, so they can run off their sugar highs from tonight. Hopefully I survive until Friday, because I still have grading to finish. And a quilt.

Yesterday, I worked for a million hours. Got home around 6 PM and kept working…I still have kids trying to give me field trip money, even though the list is done and emailed. I’m done. No more crazy this week (ha. never say no more.)

It was after 10:30 when I made it in here. The first 100 pieces are taking me FOREVER to cut out. Mostly because there’s these tiny little animals in there. So I need to find these fussy little fabrics for them. Although this is water…

Water is fun. I’ve spent about 2 1/2 hours and I’m only in the 80s. Seriously crazy. It probably doesn’t help that I’m tired and stressed out. Here’s the fabrics piled up as I was trying to pick a bird brown that would show up against the sand brown.

Then I mostly organized them and went to bed.

Sometimes that’s all you can do. Tonight is candy for the three small children who come to our door, plus my parents are finally coming back after 7 weeks. I think Katie doesn’t believe they’re ever coming back, so she’ll be excited to see them. Much as we love her, she is a needy beast and the noisiest of the three dogs…well, maybe Simba is the noisiest, but he’s also the smallest.

OK, I have to be trained on epi-pens today. Again. Need to finish bus and chaperone lists. Need to find a magic wand and erase the noise and chaos from my head. That last one seems the most important.

Insanity Laughs Under Pressure We’re Cracking*

I’m still trying to process all the gun killings last week. I’m trying to process the idiotic things people say after gun shootings and all the arguments I’ve seen on line and did I mention stupid shit people say? Whether you’re pro or con CNN, last night they refused to show the shooter’s picture or say his name…instead they spent an hour or so talking about the victims…about the couple that had been married at the synagogue 60+ years earlier, about the two brothers who were always there. I have to admit to not being able to watch…but it was an admirable choice. And little to no mention of the two African Americans gunned down in a Krogers, one with his grandson watching. WTF America? WTF. My anti-gun quilt (let me be clear, I am anti-gun) has arrived in Chicago for the Quilt+Resist show, not that it will change the minds of anyone who believes their right to a gun is greater than the rights of others to live their lives.

I am an absolute stress monkey at the moment. I have way too much on my plate and I’m exploding all over the place. I’m trying not to. I need to meditate. Last night, my meditation was in the form of ironing fabric…and a little bit of stitching. After I finished some of the grading, of course.

I did that flower in the left corner. Sometimes people ask me why I stitch on this when it’s not my design. Because it’s relaxing. And I can finish something in 20 minutes, even if it’s just a flower.

Then I messed with the road again. This road is a pain in the ass. But I’m almost done with it…I think. Although mine won’t fit around the corner until I sew the other blocks onto it…so that will have to wait.

Then I fussed with a unit my co-teacher is piloting and I’m sort of piloting as well, but I wasn’t at the training and the book is confusing and it’s hard to know what we can do in one period, plus I have to leave stuff for a sub while I’m in Boston, and somewhere in there, my head exploded because I couldn’t figure out how to open the damn PDF in Preview so I could pull out the homework. My kids are going to freak out with this much homework.

It was past 10 PM when I made it in here, the studio, the place where art happens and sometimes I grade shit. Sorted the first 100 pieces…piles of huge and piles of tiny.

The huge are dirt and water (I didn’t iron any water last night)…the tiny are animals, mostly a snake is what I dealt with…in fact, there’s the snake laid out down there.

Hopefully she looks as cool in real life as it did in my head when I was laying out its complicated ass. Seriously. Ten fabrics for one snake that is about 3″ square.

I didn’t get far. Although I have dirt fabrics picked for the rest of the mountain, I think. I need to add some grassy bits to it though. And make sure whatever is behind the bobcat makes it pop out.

So mostly that’s sand and dirt, with a few rocks and a snake. Not even 100 pieces ironed last night.

I also did the last bit of my Halloween costume. You figure it out.

I didn’t have a chance to walk the dogs (and myself) last night. That didn’t help. I calendared it for Wednesday, when I have some chance of getting home at a reasonable hour. Not last night. Not tonight. Now the eyelid is twitching as well. Sure that’s a sign of stress and tiredness (dog had to pee at 4:33 AM…not 11:50 PM, when I tried to take her out…4:33 AM, when I didn’t want to be outside half naked with a flashlight.).

*Queen and David Bowie, Under Pressure (I don’t pick these…my Pandora is psychic)

Stuff Art in the Cracks

Rough night. Something stung my toe and it hurt. Or bit it. Or whatever’d it. And then whatever my innards are doing in response to the diabetes meds…doctor appointment on Thursday. If I can get there on time. Crazy hours that day. I don’t feel right. That’s always nerve-wracking. But teaching today should be easy, so I can grade and I don’t have to feel awesome. I just have to get it all done. ALL OF IT. Yeah right. I already had one group try to turn in their project even though I haven’t given them all of the instructions. Like CHILLAX you sweet little things. You’re doing it wrong. You don’t need to panic yet.

One of the things with diabetes is that they want you to be stress free. I get all these emails and mailers from the insurance company and the doctor’s office about how to reduce stress, but my doctor actually laughed at one point and said I’d have to quit my job and that would be stressful in itself. So there’s that. I’m not sure when I will hit “less stress” for work, but it isn’t going to be this week or next. I am just trying to stay as much in control of it as I can. Exercise, take breaks, stuff art in the cracks. As part of that, I try to go do something interesting or fun on Saturday nights. We went to see the Skull Art Show at La Bodega Gallery…kind of a manufactured thing because they all start with the same skull, but some of them were interesting enough…

Huichol bead technique always makes a statement…this is Jose Lopez…

Interesting composition…Franky Agostino…

Reminds me of my students when I ask where their late work is…Cesar Castaneda…

One of my favorite artists at La Bodega, Evgeniya Golik…

And the always intriguing Optimus Volts…

Maira Meza with her lilies…

Another interesting compilation of things, Renee Tay…

And I really should have taken a better picture of the side of this…Mary Juhn.

Then we ventured out to a new place for dinner. It was strange, but the food was good. Not many choices in the drinks arena, but all the caps were outside.

Nailed to the railing.

Came home and finished trimming all the Wonder Under…it was something over 7 hours or so total.

Then Sunday evening, after my fiber-art-group meeting, I was grading again…all the late work. Simba was very helpful…

As was Satchemo…

OK, he woke up, but mostly because he wanted me to take him out to pee.

Which I did. I finished the butterfly in the car on the way to and from the meeting…

So that’s July finally done, on to August…which are the three unembellished blocks on here…

Next in line.

So then I went to sort all those pieces. I don’t throw out the trash pile until I sift through it, which is good, because I found this piece…

And then I laid out all the bins…

And spent about 40 minutes sorting pieces by the 100s.

The last step? Coming into the office and cleaning up…putting all the fabrics away from the last quilt…hanging up the new drawing.

Now I’m ready to iron tonight. Looking forward to it. But before that, I have to take my achy body to school and get all the things done.

I’m Useless but Not for Long*

I woke up this morning, having slept through lots of noises and daylight arriving and I feel like I didn’t move all night, I was so tired, I must have been like a block of sleepy concrete that weighed down the bed and refused to let pillows and blankets move, until the first dog whined, and then it was awake time.

Quilts=Art=Quilts opens today and I have a piece in it…this is You Pollute Me…

It’s actually not a very big piece…just long.

I’m grading Unit 2…lots of them. I didn’t actually bring them home, because I have three days next week, maybe four, when the kids are supposed to be working on stuff independently (ha!), so I should be able to grade them in time at school. That’s my goal anyway.

We’ll see what reality looks like, won’t we.

Last night was tiring. But I got the field trip permission slips all trimmed, checked, and double-checked, so I know who’s going and who’s not. I started a spreadsheet for the chaperones as well…and I did seating charts for Monday for the project week, which will drive me nuts, but they do have work to do, so hopefully they won’t be total assholes about being with their friend. I’m always boggled by certain groups…when a fairly high-level girl agrees to work with a boy who does NOTHING. Sigh. Oh well. They don’t always get to pick their groups, so I guess I’ll balance it out. Put all the lazy non-workers together next time.

But the dogs last night…this was after I came back from watching the band play. Calli heard fireworks before I left and it was still upsetting her. The other two just wanted closeness, I guess.

That’s Calli’s nervous face. At this point, the fireworks happened three hours ago, but she was still panting and breathing hard about it…

And here she is with her head on my leg. Yes, I petted her lots. I told her she was a good girl and it was OK. It just doesn’t seem to help any more. Oh yeah, and here I am cutting out yard 4 of Wonder Under…

Four yards in, one to go…

Hopefully that gets done today…along with the humongous pile of other things that need doing, which are giving me palpitations at the moment: grade one assignment, start looking at the next unit which we’ve never taught before because I’m going to be gone for two days in the beginning of it so I have to leave something they can actually do with a guest teacher, plus find and sew on D-rings for a quilt that has to be delivered next week, and do another blogpost for the fiber art group I’m in, plus laundry and deal with compost bins and vacuuming and cleaning floors and groceries and cleaning up in here so I can start ironing, because if I don’t start ironing soon I’m not going to get this quilt done in time.

Deep breath. Maybe more than one. I’m overwhelmed. I know that. What my brain and body really need is a 7-mile hike today. And I’m not going to get that.

So I did go watch the man play disco, of all things, last night. Not their genre. And I drew this…

Definitely influenced by the music. I’ve been to this venue, crashing this same party, at least three years in a row, and I recognize the wait staff and one of them waved at me. I’m amused. Anyway. There’s art. I did do art. I did school. I slept. I’m going to make a list and conquer its ass. And then hopefully get some down time. Get out of the house time. Maybe some exercise. Definitely dinner out with that guy I’m barely going to see in the first two weeks of November. Yeah. That.

*Gorillaz, Clint Eastwood

Fearless on my Breath*

My head is fluffy, like the pillow I’d like it still to be laying upon. Inside it’s like clouds, those puffy white ones that look like animals and then turn into vampires. Or cannons. Seriously, I always see cannons…or spaceships, but those are a particular type of cloud. I remember that. I’m sure by the time 9 AM rolls around, some of the fluff will have cleared and I’ll have more space in there for coherent thoughts. It’s a good thing I can get up, check my blood sugar, take a shower, get dressed, feed the animals, make lunch and tea and sometimes breakfast, and sit down in here without any noticeable ability to grab an intelligible thought from my brain. This stuff I write just spills out…it’s right at the edge of my brain and wriggles into my fingers, pushing keys, hey did I tell you I finally got a new keyboard? You can actually see the letters on it. What a concept.

See. My brain just got away from me there.

Interesting segue (not Segway) into one of the things I did last night…which was to see Nick Cave (the sculptural/performance artist, not the Bad Seed)…

He’s looking perturbed by some of the crazy stuff the PBS commentator guy is saying. But also…Nick, I love your stuff, but you aren’t always coherent about your place in the world. Then again, PBS guy wouldn’t shut up. It was still cool to see and hear him…the best parts are when he would describe how he did something or when he would talk about why he was doing it. As artists, we are often called upon to explain our work, and it’s not always explicable. Or it’s private enough that we put it out there and let you interpret it, but we’re not dumping the real story out there. As one of my artist friends said, if I could put it in words, I would have…but I can’t, so I use art.

I came home and graded (oh yes), and then cut another yard out…

At least this part is semi-relaxing at the moment.

Katie is so needy some nights. The other dogs were gone, so she followed me everywhere.

Blurry night dog. She’s lying behind my chair right now. Like RIGHT BEHIND it so I can’t get out.

So this is what 3 yards of cut-up Wonder Under looks like. Slightly bigger pile than 2 yards. Hopefully after tonight it will be 4 yards, although I have a show to go watch…but late, so I should be able to sneak an hour and a half of cutting stuff out into my evening. And more grading, of course.

I really want to be ironing on Saturday, but I’m not sure that’s an option. I need to get the last two yards cut out…that’s about 3 hours. I need to grade at least one major assignment…that’s another 2 hours. Plus I need to clean up from the last quilt, put all the fabrics away, so that’s another hour. Huh. Sigh. Busy day. Don’t even think about vacuuming, mopping, washing bedding, all that crap. The compost pile. All that crap.

I did buy background fabric the other day, plus I bought these to add to the stash…

Here’s the two choices for the background. I think it has to be the one on the left, just because of how busy the quilt is and what needs to go on there, but it’s OK…I’ll use the one on the right for something.

There’s always something. It was too nice to leave behind.

Today in class, the kids are researching stuff. The hope is that they are self-sufficient enough that I can grade Unit 2 before report cards go home. In the past, this has worked. The last two years have not. Sometimes I sit with a kid or table that is off task…it’s amazing how much work they get done when I’m sitting next to them, doing my own work. I guess I’m a role model at that moment. An old scary role model who is sitting next to them. As long as I can get through at least one class worth of the units, I’m not sure I care.

*Massive Attack, Teardrop

Today is About Stuff

I feel so uninteresting lately. Every day I grade, I do some variation of eating, cooking, or cleaning, or all of the above. I teach things and mostly those days are not horrendous unless I have to carry 12 trays of sand in and out of the room 10 times. I do some art-related thing, which right now is boring to watch and semi-boring to do, mostly because I can’t find anything to watch that I really WANT to watch while I’m doing this semi-boring thing, which is sad in itself. Our ability to binge watch things and the media companies’ ability to regulate what we can see when has meant there are fewer things to watch? Or fewer things that are left that I want to watch? I don’t know. I started one the other night that was not in English. I can’t cut things out or grade stuff while watching captions, so that was out. I watched 7 episodes of Grace and Frankie before I got annoyed. I’m not really a comedy person. I like a good drama. I made it through 1 3/4 episodes of Daredevil before the sound of punch punch punch started to just annoy me beyond belief. And one episode of Midsomer Murders…too pat, too obvious, too old-school British. I love things like Prime Suspect or Sherlock, but Midsomer is too perfect.

So I haven’t found the perfect show for cutting out Wonder Under yet. It’s been a bit of a slog, working on it after I finish grading…not starting until 10:30 PM or so. I have two of the five yards cut out at this point. Yesterday was so exciting that I only took one photo…

IMG_8371 small

That is what two yards of cut-up pieces looks like: not much. This is going much slower than I thought it would. I have a thing to go to tonight and tomorrow night, so I guess I probably won’t be cut out by the weekend. That said, I did go to the fabric store yesterday to get the background fabric so I will be ready to go when I am done. Because next week is a mess. And when I got to the fabric store, the girlchild called…from a fabric store! Be still my beating heart. Ah yes, for a Halloween costume. This fabric or that fabric? Facetime colors things weird. Anyway. We both bought stuff. In different states. A bonding moment.

OK, teaching stuff and then watching/listening to hopefully cool stuff and then more cutting out of stuff. Today is about stuff.