Really Hopefully

Not much to say about yesterday except that it’s done and that’s a good thing. The actual visiting of the zoo was fine…it always is…a handshake from a koala here…

I always take a picture of these plants. They are awesome.

A pelican eyeballing me here…

This cat…apparently the male across the way had a bone and she was pissed.

Not that I blame her.

And this guy…I’m always troubled at zoos by the cages, the spaces in which we put animals.

He wanted out.

The parts on either side of the zoo were difficult. But they’re done. And then the doctor’s visit was interesting. I’m waiting on blood tests and an ultrasound appointment (I have no idea how I will fit that into the next two weeks, but whatever). I’m not dying. If it hurts more, I’m supposed to go to the ER. Oh. OK. And grades are due. And I’m flying to Boston next week. And and and. It will all work out. But I’m off that crazy medicine that’s been driving me nuts for months and now, after 16 years plus of being diabetic, I’m going on insulin. So there’s that. Kind of anticlimactic. I need to write an ode to my failing pancreas. And possibly my gall bladder.

At the end of the day, late to my stitching meeting, halfway between dead exhaustion and disappointed tears and just overwhelmedness, I got a beautiful sunset. Those of you living in San Diego know that it was even better than this as time went by, and my phone camera could never capture all of it, but it was a good thing…

The universe smiling down and saying LOOK. You survived it. It will all be OK. Just hold it together.

I’m doing my best, universe.

At stitching meeting, I photographed after Julie had put her baby sweater away, but here’s my never-ending road, further along, and the other Kathy trying to figure out her house pieces for the most current Sue Spargo piece, which I have not even started and probably won’t until 2022. (I’m not showing anything finished! Just pieces! You can’t show finished things until she releases the book…and this one is totally calling to me, but I can’t start it until Folk Tails is done!)

I came home. I spaced out. I went to bed. This quilt is nowhere near far enough along. I can’t worry about that. Today I grade and teach and run some errands that need running and deal with a parent meeting and hope the rock in my upper abdomen doesn’t turn surgical (it shouldn’t) and take some breaths and maybe get some shit done so that my head stops spinning. And really hopefully, I iron tonight. For hours.