I Will Be a Grownup

Woke up this morning to a really annoying noise. My alarm. All right all right all right. I hear you. Ugh. My fault for going to bed a little late (time flew), but also Friday. The first week back. It should be an interesting day…Ramadan ended and there’s this big party that goes on, Eid, after Ramadan, and a lot of our kids don’t come to school. Interestingly, a lot of them didn’t come yesterday as well. I’m not blaming 420, because that would be crazy, but it’s certainly an interesting coincidence. We’ll see if they show up today…or even next week, because some of them just don’t. I guess that’s OK, because a goodly chunk of those showing up have forgotten that grades exist, which will be a bit of a shocker for them when their parents see their grades. You know. It’s been a rough week for all of us, sure, but for some special kids, I’m not sure what’s going through their heads.

I’ve spent most of the week trying to plan next week or even a bit further ahead than that. Can’t get too far, though, because the school board is still stupid. Also trying to get stuff copied (paper and copier issues). And graded! I’ve been doing a little every OTHER night. Last night was a big no…by the time I got home and done with my Zoom and dinner, I was too exhausted. Wednesday night I managed it though…so hopefully tonight will be a yes? If not, the Man is working tomorrow as well (ugh) and I can just do it then. Knowing you need another break from your job when you just had one? Hmmm. Yeah. My co-teacher and I were finding work examples from times gone by, and reading the names on the assignments brought back feelings of goodness…plus man, the work was so good. Yeah, I know, we only saved the good examples (true), but still. I don’t have as much faith for this crew on the same assignment. We’ll see. I have a really hard time giving up on any one kid…which I guess is a good thing considering my job, but I will be surprised if I get more than two good examples each period this year. We’ll see. They have three more days. The pro is that because of the Zoom year, I have a digital version, so I’m pushing that out to all the absent kids. Back in the day, I would have just excused them from it because I didn’t have another option. Then they miss the learning and the potential for a grade. Now? Not so much.

In quilt news, the last one is at the photographer after last night, and this one has been sorted and is ready to iron together. Which is exciting. The sorting was NOT exciting…it was a long pain in the ass, a necessary pain, but a pain nonetheless. It took two nights and almost 2 hours and 45 minutes.

That’s a long time to be dealing with little tiny pieces. I had to pick it all up, stack all the boxes, in between the two sorting times or cats would have been living in these, jumping out with a million pieces stuck to their fur, dropping them all over the house.

The first night, I got all the bigger pieces out and sorted, which left the tiny ones for last night…

Luckily I had a quilty Zoom call to force me to keep going. There’s over 1500 pieces sorted, ready for ironing.

That’s some tiny shit. And that purple v-shaped one on the left? I’m pretty sure it’s in the wrong box. I do that. I read the number, think about what box it should be in, and then between reading and thinking and actually putting it in the box, my brain rewrites the number. It doesn’t do it often, luckily, but it does. Need the brain firing correctly to do this stuff. How do I know it doesn’t belong there? There’s a whole bunch of them in another box. Probably it should be there. I’ll figure it out while I’m ironing.

So tonight, hopefully I’ll have the energy to start ironing it together. I want to. It doesn’t feel like it right now, though. Right now, I’m not sure I have the energy to walk down to the car.

Ah well. Gonna have to, whether I feel it or not.

Yesterday before school, I remembered I needed some enzymes for the DNA activity, so I made those…

And at the end of the day, I knew I’d need a snack to get me from school to the photographer, and I had this little pie we’d bought as a treat on the Arizona trip and I’d never eaten, so here it is…

It was OK, considering it cost $0.79. Yeah.

Wednesday night, I was trying to meditate before sleepy time, but these guys…

I wanted to turn the light off, but couldn’t reach it without throwing them both off…

Eventually Luna left because she heard her Daddy, so I could stretch out a bit for the lamp switch without tossing the old lady off. Not so much last night…she settled by my head and I tried to encourage her down the side, and she got pissed off and left. OK then. My bed anyway, y’all.

Legit.

More owl videos.

There was more screeching last night…but also lots of videos with rodents in beaks. Someone got dinner.

Good to control the rat population.

Ugh. I’m really wanting to just grab the current book, ignore the three emails I’ve seen already that will need time and energy to answer, crawl into a hole somewhere, and read for the next 8 hours. But no. I will be a grownup and go teach ecosystems and DNA and deal with my exhaustion with caffeine. But ironing at some point this weekend. I’m not sure how I will find the time, but I will.

Trying to Do the Things…

Already exhausted enough to sleep deeply until the alarm. There are pros and cons to that. Two days of coming to school and trying to do the things and leaving school feeling like I got none of the things done. I crossed one whole thing off the to-do list yesterday. Spent two periods trying to teach over two boys who really need parents sitting next to them so they know how their kids behave. I’ve stopped contacting them, because nothing changes. Frustrating, but it’s the end of the year and I don’t have the energy for it. Or the time. Too many other things I need to do. If there were paper in the copier, that would help, but that’s been none of the three times I tried to copy stuff. I have stuff I need for today, but who knows what I will see when I get to school. Paper? Paper out? Red light flashing? Yeah that. I need assignments for next week, most of which need some tweaking or full-on editing. Not sure when that will happen, because the scramble for 7th-grade curriculum is also happening, thanks to our idiotic school board.

What will make me quit teaching? The god-damned adults who don’t have a clue what we do. Or why. And get in the fucking way.

Actually I can’t afford to quit. So there’s that. Yet. And when I do, we’ll call it retirement.

In good news, I finished the binding and sleeves in two nights…Monday night, I watched Maria Shell’s lecture on Zoom about community quilts…interesting stuff.

She gave me a few more artist residencies to follow…although I know I want to be out in nature, not in a city, and somewhere different from where I live. There are residencies here that are just glorified rental properties, and I could do that, but I want two weeks somewhere totally different, new views, space, I don’t know what, and I’m overwhelmed by the thought of what I would do, or the ones that want community involvement, I never know what to do with that. But it’s on my list for the future; has been for years. YEARS.

Nova was remarkably unhelpful. She likes my lap when I am trapped by a quilt.

She is a sweet boo.

So yeah, it’s done…

Goes to the photographer tomorrow, then gets entered into the show that forced itself upon me. Long story. Curators. What can you do? Ignore them? Don’t enter? Yeah, well, it might not get in because of the boobs. We’ll see. No uterus! Trying to keep it simple. Also I didn’t realize the quilt I made for another show would get accepted and then rejected (sigh), so it would have worked for this show as well. Oh well.

But now I can go back to the other one, which has a later due date…first I have to deal with this pile. Mostly it’s the fabrics I used for the last two quilts. I keep them out until I’m done in case I need to recut something, which happens at the ironing down stage usually.

But then Kitten made a disaster of fabric as well, so that’s in there. It’s just a mess. I did sort through it all; can’t put them away yet, but I think I can start sorting and maybe ironing together tonight. Although at some point, I need to grade a bunch of redoes and late work, plus plan/create a bunch of stuff, and IDK how I’m supposed to do that during the day when so much other crap gets thrown at me. I had a plan for after school yesterday and it didn’t happen. I did, however, go to the gym and read my book. So there’s that. Fantasy!

The tent the girlchild got the cats is still popular.

Nova looks particularly thoughtful.

Doves are back, trying to nest somewhere in this area. We’ll probably figure out where at some point.

The freesias are happily blooming still, although looking pretty beat up. Mostly because Simba stands on them.

We officially have one baby owl? I heard it for the first time on Monday night. Last night, I was in the living room, on the other side of the house, and heard the adults screeching like crazy. Usually we might hear one screech occasionally, but this was attack level. I went out there and both mom and dad were screeching nonstop, and I scared something away, large and fast (probably coyote) in the bushes. Baby was screeching away but mom and dad were quiet. I found one of them (video has already been labeled as ‘Blair Witch Project’, which it is, shitty and all, night time with flashlight, but one parent is in the pine tree, never found the other one, you can hear the baby in the box)…

And about 10 minutes later, the owl cam we have showed mom going back into the box, threat removed.

I’m invested in these babies dammit.

OK. School. Sex trafficking assembly for two periods (can I take my computer and work?), plus a prep period for 7th grade, I’m thinking, and Pilates after school, get the quilt cleaned up and ironed and ready for photography. Then sort 1500+ pieces and start ironing. Probably should grade some shit before that happens. Ugh. OK. I just want to read my book somewhere quiet.

The Last Tired Minute…

43 days. I often come back to school after Spring Break with some sense of exhaustion, sometimes burnout, although usually Spring Break helps with that…and it did. I can’t imagine how burnt out I’d feel right now if I hadn’t had two weeks off. This year seems worse. As I was making new seating charts last night, the thought of actually being in the classroom, trying to impart knowledge to some of these totally checked-out kids, of the daily war to get stuff out there and have it matter on some level…plus stress about finishing grades and the school board being stupid with the sex ed curriculum, because that means having to come up with something else at the last minute, the last TIRED minute, plus realizing I should have spent HOURS on 8th grade because it wasn’t planned out past tomorrow. All that. I needed to not think about it for a while, so that’s what I did. And now I have to think about it again.

43 days.

Meanwhile, I finished quilting…

I did a marathon (not really…I’ve done longer) of almost 4 hours on Friday…

Even did a different color for once. I didn’t want the words to overpower the lab coat.

I only had a little outlining left…here on the head. So mostly I did background scribbling.

Stayed up a little late to finish. It’s OK. Saturday was chill. Well, I had to ship a quilt (did that), buy more boxes (did that too), and buy binding (yup). The quilt store I like has never gone back to pre-COVID hours, so I can only go on Saturdays before 3. It sucks, and sometimes means I don’t go there…I shop my stash. Which is a pain sometimes, to find enough…this one, I probably JUST could have found enough if I’d had the right color of batik (they’re wider than most of the others). But I’m glad I didn’t have to spend an hour dealing with that. It’s not ideal to buy more fabric or spend money, but it’s nice and easy.

Saturday, I trimmed the damn thing. Had to clean the floor again, but this time I had knee pads!

A friend sent me a link while I was camping after seeing the pinbasting post. It helped, although getting up and down with them on was a challenge. Probably I’m doing that wrong.

Then last night, I got the binding partially on…

Still need to sew the sleeves on and then handstitch the rest. Yeah, I do that. It’s OK. I don’t mind. And I’m fast. Emailed the photographer already. Then it’s time to do the next one…which is half done already. So I will start with sorting all the cut-out ironed-on pieces and go straight into ironing it together. Which means cleaning up the disaster of fabric that is behind me right now. Yup. Not looking forward to that part.

But first, I have to go to school and get my room back in order. They cleaned floors and luckily put my tables and chairs back, but the rest is a disaster. I’m gonna sweep it all behind the counter and trip over it for a few days until I can find a place for it all again. Yesterday was 6+ hours of school stuff…yes, because I’d ignored a lot of it for the last week. I did some on Saturday night, stuff I’d forgotten about. Whoops! And one academic assignment I knew I hadn’t done. But yesterday, I realized I had needed to probably spend another 6+ hours on 8th grade. I tentatively have stuff for the whole week now, but previously, only had through tomorrow. I need to figure one thing out for sure, but need time for that, and a 2-hour staff meeting about literacy will not help with that. Although it’s important. I hope the meeting is helpful. We’ll see. Part of the planning required me to draw three strands of DNA…here’s one.

Like you do. It was easier to draw it than find what I wanted online.

Persuaded the Man to hike on Saturday. I needed to get out of the house and we need to get back in the habit…

His back was bugging him, so we did flat…

Flowers were out though. And it was 3 miles of flat. Better than nothing.

I also finished the May Sue Spargo Homegrown blocks…

I have June and July left…

Not going to be done anytime soon, that’s for sure. But I enjoy stitching them.

Luna being sweet…as a counterpoint to putting her claws in your body parts when she panics and runs away because of some strange noise or movement she didn’t like.

Kitten being very needy.

Right there, in my face, as I’m trying to eat or read.

And Nova…

Taking up my whole chair. I think she moved a little bit to let me sit down and work…but not a lot.

OK. Need to go deal with my room. Get my head in the game. I think I’m doing genetic traits today with 8th and ecosystem cover page with 7th. Changed all their seats, more for my sanity than anything else. Two-hour meeting after school. Maybe a walk after that? Another habit I need to get back into. Zoom meeting tonight…I would have gone to the meeting, but the speaker is Zooming instead of coming, so it seems pointless to drive all that way. I can listen on Zoom and finish the binding. Easier after a long first day.

Up High…

From Organ Pipe, we went up to 5500′ in elevation, higher where we hiked. It was cooler, but not enough during the day to really matter. We considered (and deconsidered…unconsidered? Removed from consideration) one hike due to the climb with the heat. We’re out of shape and heat is hard. But it was still a nice place to be, Chiricahua National Monument, which might be a National Park by the next time we go. Which will be hard for it, because there are only 26 campsites or something like that. We had a great campsite when we were there in 2018 (minus the loud kids in the two sites next to us), but I couldn’t get that one, so this is the one next to it.

Not as good. Lots of sun issues during the day, lots of moving chairs to get shade. But not bad. The amphitheater was right next to it, though, and people kept going there to have private conversations and/or entertain children. Notes for next time.

The last time we were there, we had the energy to hike after we set up camp (WTF, who were those people?); this time? Not so much. We did sit through an hour-long presentation on paws, pines, and poop that was totally worth it. I know more about animal poop now than I ever did before. Did not help at all when I was on the trail, staring at scat, trying to figure out who had left it. Ah well.

There were many Mexican jays in camp.

They were pretty ballsy about being on the tables…

Good reminder to put shit away, which is good, because this is bear country…and jaguar, mountain lion, and bobcat territory, plus!!!

Our first time seeing a WHOLE coatimundi in the wild (last time we only saw the tail disappearing into the brush). This is a single male. We still haven’t seen a whole group of females wandering around.

Last time, we also saw deer. We saw them while driving this time…

But our evening attempt to hike to the meadow they like to hang out in turned into a mostly dark night hike, not so good for seeing deer. We were really bad at timing dinner this trip…either too late or too late. Really, we were always too late even when we tried to be early.

The first night, after the very long poop talk, we ate freeze-dried things and then the Man tried starting a fire, but it wasn’t in the mood and neither was he. I did draw by the dying fire…

The wind picked up while we were there.

The last time we were here, we missed a shuttle up to the top with a hike down to the visitor center (we only camped one night), so this time, we wanted to do that. The shuttle picks you up in the campground and drives you up to Massai Point, so you don’t have to come back to your car.

Last time, we went down into Echo Canyon and then had to climb back out in the heat, which was not fun. So this was more fun. Although it was still hot. So we have saved the longer hike for the next time, when we will either have to start earlier in the year or earlier in the day. Not sure which is going to be easier to pull off. PLUS be in better shape going into vacation, so no job shit that takes up tons of time, no scarlet fever or nasty colds. You know. Ha! Because we have control over all that.

Chiricahua is known for its hoodoos.

It’s different than Bryce, if you’ve been there. But still cool.

That said, it was warm and we were glad to mostly be going downhill.

Lots of different pine trees out there too, a nice change from saguaros.

Also these things are fun to consider drawing.

So this was about 5 miles down…

Mostly exposed…

Reminded us of home, honestly. But there was a breeze, which made it bearable. It really was only in the 80s, but at 6500 feet starting, the sun just feels hotter.

There was still water in the stream at the bottom though. We did another mile and half at dusk to Not See the deer, so we got our 5-mile Hike to Health pin from Chiricahua too. Cool beans. And we have reasons to come back.

I worked on this block in the car from El Cajon to Organ Pipe, in the campground at Organ Pipe, in the car from Organ Pipe to Chiricahua, in the campground at Chiricahua, and in the car home to El Cajon…

I go back and forth during the day between stitching (mostly brainless) and reading (requires slightly more brainpower, depending on the book)…nighttime is for drawing.

I finished it somewhere outside of Gila Bend, I think. Or going into Gila Bend. Hard to say. It all looks the same.

Is that Interstate 10 or the 8? And then I started the next one…got about that far in the car…

And almost finished it…

Crooked tree trunk and all.

So when we got home, we were there for less than 24 hours, and then left for a They Might Be Giants concert at Humphreys. We had reserved a room as a treat, and they gave us a balcony overlooking the venue! So I stitched there a bit…

If we’d been smart, we would have watched the whole show from the room, because it rained and rained (drizzle, but solidly wetly constantly drizzling)…

It was fine in that picture…

But no. We wanted to hang out and bounce around down where we could see the whole thing.

Although trying to see over the people in front of me got harder and harder. Ah well. And this video was because everyone was singing along to this, but you can also see the rain going sideways through it.

Amusing. And no, we didn’t bring raingear. This is freakin’ San Diego, y’all. In Spring. So I think I had 4 layers on, including a hoodie. The Man didn’t. We didn’t think it through. It was fine; we had fun.

Foggy/cloudy view of downtown.

We wanted to test out some of the AI art apps, just to see what they did. I find them frustrating, and gave up pretty quickly, but from that picture of us above, and the text “woman covered with cats”, I got this.

I couldn’t get it to do anything with my art. Ah well. I went back to stitching. The Man has 20 tries with mice with mushroom hats.

Here are better pictures of the four drawings I did on the trip…

Some were more complicated than others. Oh wait, there were five. But I abandoned this one.

It was after I’d seen a bunch of news articles about shooting and pregnancy laws and stupid political bullshit. Like this shit…

Which then turned into this one…and anytime they want to pull Viagra? I’m good with that.

Which I might make into something.

Here’s the windy night drawing…

I was reading about all this space stuff, which might explain her head. Might not.

And the last night, when we were both in pretty irritable moods honestly…

Although it’s not apparent in the drawing, unless you look at the really bad coatimundi drawing. Ah well. Shit happens.

I also managed to find the energy to quilt on Tuesday night…

It took a lot of caffeine…

And a certain amount of panic about the end of Spring Break always coming much faster than I’m prepared for. Yesterday, I spent most of the day working on a artist’s grant application. My CV is now up-to-date, I’ve found some relevant press releases, and I submitted the whole damn thing around noon today…probably about 10 hours in that thing, but if I get it, totally worth it. If I don’t? I can try again. I’ve done the hardest part already. Plus maybe it’s time to try for some artist residencies too, although they would need to be paid for in some way.

More quilting last night after staring at that damn CV for about 5 hours…

I’m more than halfway through the outlining. More today. I was expecting to be done with this by today, but reality is always a slap across the face. I have four things to grade, all the makeups and redoes to grade, lesson planning for 8th grade, posts for 7th and 8th…ugh. I will have to do some of that today or tomorrow, but the goal is to finish the quilting, pack up another quilt for a show, do some house and yard work? Maybe. Eh. Floors need cleaning. I want to go on a hike tomorrow. We’ll see.

Kitten has been stalking me. She’s very glad to have me back.

The other two are as well…

I’ll finish off with this…

Made me laugh.

OK. Yard? Because it’s still daylight and a little moving around won’t hurt me. Then quilting. I’m not cooking tonight (hurrah!). Then more quilting. Yeah.

Just Sitting…

Hoo. Boy. I spent about two hours last night yelling at my school computer and an app. My right eye was still twitching (hard) last night, but has stopped this morning. I have a canker sore starting in my mouth, which is one of my stress signs. WHY??? I am on Spring Break, dammit. I’m also fully aware of all the crap that needs to get done over break. And apparently my internet service will be down tomorrow for some period of time. Or will it be tomorrow? They keep saying there will be more info and there hasn’t been. Feel free to take my internet down while I’m gone. The boychild will not be happy, but I’ll be fine. So internet out means I need to find a way to get all the work done before that happens. Tomorrow. PLUS pack. Plus do all the other things.

Yesterday was not the most productive, or maybe it was and I just felt unproductive. I took two animals to the vet; one needed a referral to an eye doctor, and they haven’t called me back yet. The other one is fine. But that was an hour. Then I went to pick up quilts from a friend who had brought my work home from a show because I couldn’t get there in the time they allotted, which was super nice, and the conversation was good. I appreciate having time for that. Then JoAnns hell to get batting and thread (which I thought about the night before while trying to fall asleep). Then home, to the gym (yay! back on the schedule!), then dinner, then trying to grade that thing that has a giant-ass bug (not the first one). They still haven’t fixed the last bug I filed with them. So frustrated. I didn’t start stitchdown until 10:07 PM…on a vacation day. WTF.

Anyway, so I finished ironing together on Sunday night…

And then ironed it down to the background…

I’m having huge issues this morning with internet and getting photos to load, so I’m just writing words right now and hoping stuff behaves later. And here I am now, in the afternoon, hoping even harder.

Then last night, at 10:07 PM, I started the stitchdown. It won’t take long. I just have to be home and not doing something else to do it. Which seems problematic at the moment unfortunately.

This morning, I’m going to see a show at the Mingei with my mom–need to leave in about 2 minutes, by the way–so WordPress being a pain is truly unhelpful. (I already went. It really was having issues this morning.)

More about the Mingei later; it’s showing the 25 Million Stitches refugee stitched panels. Very cool. You should totally go see it. Them. Yeah.

So now it’s afternoon and I’ve seen the show, eaten lunch, planted the 8 jade plants I cut off the other main one that was falling over into the entryway path, plus watered a few things for the first time in like 5 months. Strange for us to have so much rain. Looks like we might be done, but a little more wouldn’t hurt at this point. Preferably not while I’m camping though. Please.

I need to start packing for camping, I have one more class of hellacious app assignment to grade, plus one pile of packets, plus two classes of another thing, plus homework. Plus lesson planning. Yeah, not all of that is happening before I leave. It just can’t. I need to prop up/restake my lemon tree…current stake is literally falling down on the job. Also weed the world. Literally so many weeds. Turn the sprinklers back on. Prop up the gutter downspout better, caulk the stained glass (all the while wondering how long the wood that is there will last anyway). Wishing I were more of a handyperson than I am. FINALLY after 7 weeks got the replacement faucet so we are no longer doing high-pressure dishwashing that sprays everywhere. Next time, I will just replace the whole thing. Remind me. Also, I think when I retire, I can hire out my services to bug-check educational apps. Like seriously…did no one actually make sure it worked? Sigh. Fucking giant sigh. They should at least send me a t-shirt or something. Oh yeah, also apply to that big thing that needs 47 things written for it. I have until the 14th on that one. Ha! I come back the 12th. It’s fine.

Also I feel very successful in my teaching now.

I laughed very hard. But was proud.

Amazon and its boxes…sigh.

Luna does know how to get INTO the cat tent, but she doesn’t always do it…

And getting ready to camp in mid- to high-80s? A friend rightly sent me this…

The cats have been lying around in all the sunny bits. I don’t blame them. The last two nights have been in the 30s here, but the sun is still warm during the day.

Not summer warm, but beginning of spring warm. That towel is supposed to be on the back of the fabric drawers, protecting the fabric. Kitten decided otherwise.

At bedtime, they follow us down the hallway. Luna is always first. Then these two negotiate the space.

And this morning, after my shower…

Bunch of weirdos. I have been appreciating the few hours of extra sleep, plus time to go exercise without having to worry about what I’m teaching the next day. I feel hopeful about the last 9 weeks of school. Right now. Right now, I feel hopeful. With another 11 days of break. Spring Break always goes so fast. I need to clean so many things and I am getting none of it done. Stitchdown! I need to do an hour this afternoon before pilates. Then hopefully finish tonight, pinbaste tomorrow in between last-minute camping shopping and packing. Looking forward to reading and drawing and stitching and hiking. And just SITTING without thinking about cleaning or weeding. Sounds great.

Peace and Quiet

Well. It’s Monday morning and I’m still in my pajamas (I couldn’t do that over the weekend; had places I had to be)…I need to do this at least once over break or it doesn’t feel like time off. I did grade stuff on Sunday and will do more today, just because it has to be done and I’d rather get it over with than have it looming over me at the end of break. No matter what I do, something will be left until the last minute and the Sunday before we go back will be panicky, but I can do my best now to make it better. Future self will appreciate it.

I also did a bunch of art stuff, so I’m feeling OK at the moment. The yard is scaring me with its overabundance of shit growing out of control and needing maintenance, but I feel like that’s an annual thing and this year is just a bit worse because we’ve had so much rain. The weeds, man, there are weeds for DAYS. But I have four days before we leave to go camping, so that’s time that needs to be utilized wisely. So far in the last three days, I have sent a few emails out for something I’m thinking about, the Man and I planned food and made lists for camping, I made it to one exercise class and one meeting…I’m doing amazing! Oh yeah, finished a book and started another one. I am feeling a little panicky actually because my to-do list is a bit overwhelming. But I think it’s a lot of little things that can be banged out quickly. I hope.

So the quilt pieces got sorted on Friday night (I was really tired)…

That was after going out and listening to a friend’s dad’s band and playing some meme game…

Yeah, that’s me reading the cards. So it’s no wonder I was tired when I got home…we also stopped for food on the way home…

I don’t often go out on Friday nights…too tired. This time, it was the first Friday night of Spring Break, so it felt doable. Last year, I got on a plane and flew overnight to see the girlchild…who got a new job yesterday! She’s coming back to the West Coast, so that is lovely. And hopefully this job will be better. It feels like everyone around me is getting new bosses in the next few months…including me. Change…is good sometimes.

Saturday, my quilt guild had their 3rd birthday party (yes, we started right when COVID started). The birthday cupcakes had an issue with spelling…

I worked on this while sitting there…

Wait, I have video…

I’ve been working on this since 2020, I think. It is not fast stitching, but it’s meditative.

So after that, I ironed the newest quilt together…got a chunk done before dinner…

Then came back after dinner and did more…

And on Sunday, got the main figure done…

And started working on the doctor’s lab coat…

There are a lot of pieces in this coat. Today, hopefully I’ll finish the ironing and get it ironed to the background so I can start stitchdown. My goal for the week is to finish stitchdown and get it pinbasted by the time we leave for Arizona. I think I can do that…until I start thinking about all the other things that need doing. Yeah! Woo!

New puppy Annie (Anwen) at my ex’s house…Simba is still not enamored of puppy behaviors.

That is HIS pillow. Poor puppy. She’s adorable.

OK. Boychild says I have lots of yardwork to do. My to-do list has a lot of art and house stuff on it, as well as yard stuff. I think I need to take a shower and get out of pajamas, unfortunately. Although I think I’m going to do one school thing first. I finished 2/3s of something yesterday and I’d like to get the last third done. Then start checking shit off the list. But also read and pee when I want (teacher dreams!) and eat when I’m hungry and not as fast as I can. And take deep relaxing calming breaths because I can. Thank you, Spring Break, for giving me some peace and quiet.

Drawing in My Head…

I think I am going to go to sleep tonight and wake up sometime next Wednesday. And hopefully all the things I need to do and/or have forgotten to do will magically be done and I will feel refreshed and ready to take on the last 9 weeks of school. Damn, that sounds long. Not as long as 38 weeks, but long. I’ve managed to grade a ton of stuff in the last three weeks, so I will go into break with two academic assignments, a couple of effort questions, and (so far) 4 classes of packets. I’ve finished one of the 8th grade packets; they’re small and easy to grade. 7th grade is probably coming home with me. I have to clean my room enough so that they can clean the floors (finally! last cleaned in August), and there’s a 90-minute talent show assembly today, so both of those things are exhausting. But doable. I can see the light! At the end of a long tunnel. It’ll be fine. Bad news the other day was bad. But not devastating. Ah well. Change. It’s neverending. Just keeps happening. Roll with it. Maybe roll over on your back and look like a dead bug, but roll nonetheless.

Artwise, the break is looking awesome. There’s a show I want to go see, I have two quilts ready to iron together, one of which needs to be done by the time break is over, I’m going to have time to draw the two quilts that are hanging out in my head at the moment. One of them is school shootings again. Because you know what? They haven’t stopped.

When I have problems falling asleep or falling back to sleep at night, I imagine where I am in the current quilt and walk myself through the next steps. My counselor said I could also think about the next quilt. That might have been a mistake. I drew an entire anti-gun/pro-kid quilt in my head the other night and now I have to draw it for real.

So much truth. And this one is heartbreaking.

Certainly I think about whether I’ll get to retirement without living through a school shooting at my own school. I think all teachers probably do. It’s exhausting on top of everything else we do.

So there’s all that, and then there’s making art. I actually have a second quilt that drew itself in my head in the last week, so I have some drawing to do at some point.

Wednesday night, I cut stuff out.

I was feeling close to done, and sure enough, last night, I finished.

It took 6 hours and 45 minutes over the last week. Tonight I’ll sort them and clean up in the studio a little bit so I can iron. I don’t know if I’ll have the energy to start ironing, but if I don’t tonight, I will tomorrow. Because I don’t have to grade anything tomorrow or lesson plan anything. I will need to at some point during break, but it doesn’t have to be tomorrow. Looking forward to a break from all that work, every day, nonstop, panicking regularly about what the fuck I’m doing in 8th grade. Don’t want to normalize that.

I find this funny, but I don’t think I’m either. There’s a regular disagreement about silverware, but whatever.

Oh yeah! One of my students painted me this…

She also wrote me a long note on the back and that helped me get through a long day. Kids are good. In general. Even the annoying ones (which she is not).

Another kid I’ve had for almost 2 years now actually showed up in my classroom after school and asked for help (!) after never doing that before, and then she went home and did the thing and emailed me she was done and I am so damn proud of her for doing all that. She’s super shy and quiet and honestly anxious maybe frightened and I’m so happy she got to that point. A good day if that’s all I look at (I should learn to just look at that and not the annoying tiresome bits, yeah?).

Simba has a new friend…

My ex got a new dog, a puppy. Anwen is 14 weeks, so this is a good comparison for the future when she is full grown next to Simba, who is middle-aged at this point. She’s adorable and sweet and I’m looking forward to seeing her grow up.

OK. It’s the final countdown. Eight hours until they are gone and I am finalizing my disaster of a room. Spring Break is a reset button. Get back to eating healthy and more exercise. REST for fuck’s sake. Let my teaching brain have a break. It’s time.

Reading a Lot…

There’s nothing like an 8 PM email from your principal saying there’s a meeting tomorrow morning to set off a bunch of teachers, especially right after the Nashville shooting. Should we be calling it a shooting? Or a killing? I feel like the latter is relevant. Seven guns. Seriously Tennessee. WTF. Sigh. Anyway, I’m sure it’s something like last year, where they promoted one of our admin right out of our school…in March…with three months left to go, leaving us with an open position right when our kids don’t need change. So it’ll be that. I’m just a lowly teacher; I can’t possibly understand the business acumen that goes into pulling a stable authority figure out of a middle school this close to the end of the year.

Also, my school board is populated with idiots who don’t want us to teach sex ed, despite the state law requiring certain things be taught. I’m glad that law exists so the stupidity that seems to permeate this nation can’t keep my kids from getting information they need to be healthy in the future (or for some of them, right now, because they already need it). Unfortunately, the majority of my school board IS that stupid. So either we’re not teaching it (and getting fined by the state, because that money couldn’t be used to educate children instead of glorifying the opinions of a few small-minded folks) or we’re teaching an older version with less offensive stuff in it (don’t even ask). I do know we’re supposed to be teaching it fairly soon after Spring Break, so these dumbasses need to be making a logical decision soon or we will have to come up with 5 weeks of curriculum that doesn’t currently exist, and that we don’t have the mental energy to create.

Somewhat frustrated this morning. Also this.

Three more days of school until break. Until I break.

I’m still cutting things out, which is good, because I am sitting and watching shows that don’t require a lot of mental energy. Monday night…after grading…

Tuesday night was complicated. I had physical therapy and then came home and finished my book instead of grading. So maybe it wasn’t complicated. I was going to grade, but then the flurry of texts came through about the email from the principal, and I had lost my impetus to grade. Maybe best. So I cut more stuff out.

It looks different. Still not obviously halfway, but I think it is? Not sure. Can’t tell.

I did a little on this too, until I remembered I had stuff to cut out.

Probably should finish this before we go camping, because it’s almost done anyway. I’ve got time though. We’re not camping until Easter weekend.

After PT, I went shoe shopping, which just means I tried on some shoes and then bought the same ones I already own because they were the most comfortable (the old pair is falling apart). Really, I just did it for the cats, so they’d have a bag and some boxes to hang out in. Luna appreciated it.

So did Nova…

She has an obsession with moths and geckos…

Hopefully my windowsill plants will survive her obsession. It’s been iffy at times.

I need to set up the rest of a lab this morning. I did most of it yesterday, but I need water at 65 degrees Celsius (I think?) and a bunch of pipettes in tubes that currently have lids on them. So 20 lids off, 60 pipettes in, water in, water bath on, then meeting of unknowness, then lab all morning, I don’t remember what in the afternoon, then pilates. I’m cooking dinner, I need to grade the thing I couldn’t grade last night (hoping mental status is more focused, ha!), then more cutting of the things. Sleep. If I’m lucky. I’m reading a lot these days; seems to help.

Solid Dream State…

I woke up from a solid dream state (better than most of the night), deeply ensconced in a dream in a country I’ve never been to, hanging out with a person I only know online (and I don’t think we’ve ever actually even had an online conversation), a quilt person, nonetheless. And I’m thinking, why isn’t my brain solving all the issues that were keeping me from sleeping? School, yard, house, money, etc. Although I guess technically, maybe that was my brain’s solution: send her on a vacation far far away.

Nicely done, brain, nicely done.

I know some people are already on Spring Break. We’re not. We’re so incredibly not. We WANT to be, but no, not yet. Five more days. After last week, it feels like five days is five too many, but the universe disagrees and wants us to forge on. We’re too tired to teach, too tired to plan or clean (that needs to happen before Spring Break too…we clean so they can clean our floors, which didn’t get done in December either). Too tired to grade, although my plan is to do as much as possible so I have as little as possible over break. Ha! It’s actually impossible. It’ll be fine. Really. My to-do list is already bigger than the number of days I have off, and since we’re going camping for some of those days, you know how that will work.

Ah well. In other gigantic news, I spent 6 hours on Saturday and managed to get my taxes from YOU OWE A LOT to WE OWE YOU SOME NOT A LOT BUT BETTER THAN NOTHING. That was a relief. Now to figure out how to pay property taxes. Minor issue. I’d like to come out of all of this with some money in savings to get through the summer. Unfortunately, I don’t see having enough to go to Quilt National in May, but I figured that was a long shot anyway.

I also finished ironing all the pieces down for the second quilt in progress…ironically, because I had entered 5 pieces in another show and the curator said they were definitely taking one of the new ones, and then they didn’t. Hmmm. So the new one, which probably would work for this other show where the curator is clueless and needs stuff from the last year, is now available. If I’d known that a month ago, I probably wouldn’t have started this one, because there is ANOTHER one I want to make for a show, and I’m running out of time. AARGH. Well. There we are. My plan is to finish this one by the end of Spring Break, if not earlier, start drawing the other one, then iron the one that was already started and get it done, so I can get the other one done before the deadline. MAGIC! Oh wait. Day job. Fuck.

Anyway, Friday night, I got within 100 pieces of done…

That was after taking a bunch of 8th graders to the Midway…let’s see, planes, military, not my thing. It was OK. I had a good group (very quiet and docile) and one very excited kid to be on planes…

I was glad to not be teaching for a while, although I had to come back and deal with 7th grade.

Who didn’t earn a movie. Actually, I gave them Bill Nye. But normally I’d do something fun, and that didn’t happen. It’s OK…11 were absent in 6th period, so this was a better choice.

Saturday was all taxes until after dinner. Oh wait, no it wasn’t. I hemmed the Man’s pants for a show…

My favorite: polyester AND zippers. Fun stuff. It was a private show, so I couldn’t go, but I needed to do taxes anyway.

Then I finished up the ironing…

A total of 8 hours and 40 minutes of that, plus 118 fabrics.

Lots of flesh colors on the right. So many people in this thing, and I made one of them blue, but there were still a lot.

I started trimming on Saturday night…

And kept going last night…

After doing school stuff for about 7 hours. Fun! I have a lot of letters to cut out, but that’s OK. It’s like a meditative puzzle at this point. I’m hoping to be done with the cutting before the weekend, then iron it together, iron it down, stitch it down, pinbaste…all before we leave to go camping. It’s a short trip this year…the Man doesn’t have a lot of days off, and we have a concert to come back for.

On my lap Saturday night…staring into the corner of the ceiling, where aliens wait to drop on my head…

Invisible aliens, except to cats.

The freesias I planted last year that were eaten by bunnies are finally up.

They got enough rain this year, apparently. We’re well over our normal rainfall. Although I’m done with rain. The universe is NOT done…more Wednesday. Ugh.

OK. So today after school, I have to watch a bunch of basketball games instead of a staff meeting (I have work to do, y’all). Then I can read my book, grade more stuff, and cut more stuff out. A day at a time is how we survive this week. Today is an activity in 7th grade that hopefully they can handle. In 8th grade, we are finishing the stuff we should have finished last week, but the app was being a butthead, so I had to give them extra time. I have a big lab on Wednesday. Then IDK what by the time we get to Friday. I’m probably not the only teacher that is IDK what by Friday this week, so I’m OK with that. I’ll figure it out by then. Meanwhile, books, exercise, and art save the day!

Different Shade of Red

Field trip day. Pros: no teaching in the AM, get to be outside (sort of?), and I’m chaperoning the introvert art geek girls (they picked ME! OK, I was one of them in middle and high school). Cons: I still have to teach 7th grade (hoping the annoying ones go home early or don’t come to school), I’m going to the Midway (ah, me and the military, such a fit), my knee is still not the best (I totally fell off my physical therapy schedule with getting sick), and I’m totally exhausted already. At least it’s different. I appreciate a different day every once in a while. A change in the routine. It isn’t until we’re on the buses, though, that it feels OK. Right now, it just feels stressful, but since my co-teacher did almost everything (!), I really shouldn’t complain. She’s awesome, IDK how she does it, oh yeah, she has a student teacher and I always say no to those. NOT rethinking that. The day I say yes is the day I get some perky little thing that drives me bonkers.

In other news, it’s Friday, hallelujah, even if I have to spend all of tomorrow doing taxes and planning for next week, I don’t care, because it will be here where I can pee when I want and make 7 thousand cups of tea and pet dogs and cats in wild abandon. Plus no annoying, gaslighting 13-year-old boys who are clueless about life. I do appreciate most of them, because most of them in 8th grade seem to be getting a clue or are totally mature and responsible and amazing. Which I tell them all the time. One of the gaslighters told me he would be a MAN next year (age 14, freshman in high school) and he would be nice to me when I was nice to him. OMG. SHHHHHHH. I told him I figured he’d be OK, he’s smart enough, eventually he would figure out what he needed to do.

So being away from all that shit for two days is a plus. I do appreciate a huge number of my kids…I really do. They do the things, they think, they try, they work, they ask questions, they figure stuff out. They’re fun even when they’re having a hard day, because they realize they’re having a hard day. It’s a pretty small percentage of those who drive us bonkers, but this year, the bonkers is taller and wider.

I ironed on Wednesday night…

I started ironing all the little figures the main figure is protecting. I needed lots of small runs of different flesh tones. Hopefully it works out.

Then last night, I finished those and started on the rest of the bits and pieces that make up the figure.

The top left bin is all the fabrics I used for the figures; there are 7 of them. I couldn’t even iron all their hearts onto the same red fabric. They needed their own shade of red. Crazy, I know. I have a few of the 300s left, and then I think I’m in the 400s. So more than halfway? I think? Who knows. My biggest issue is what to do with the main figure’s hair. When I decided to make her blue (on a blue background), I didn’t really consider hair. I might just go for some crazy multi-color thing. We’ll see. Probably tonight we’ll see.

The right eye is twitching again. It went away for a bit, but it’s back.

I also had my stitching Zoom meeting last night, so I worked on one of the May Homegrown blocks from Sue Spargo.

I’ve been working on these forever. Then again, her Bird Crazy (not its real name) quilt is still under my machine, and I think I started quilting it in January. It would probably take 2 or 3 hours to finish it…it’s on my list for Spring Break. So is EVERYTHING though.

I figured this out really quickly…

I have a screenprint from before the kids are born that is called Make It So. Someday I’ll get all my prints photographed (or copied from slides) and posted somewhere. Not this year.

OK. I have to go to school. Need to put a snack in my bag. Need to make sure I’m ready for later. Ha! I’m never ready for later. More tea. Don’t forget to pee. Phone fully charged. Lunch ready for when we get back (I’d better get to eat…it’s always an issue these days and that sucks). Exhaustion level high, but we all know how to deal with that. Six days of school until Spring Break. We can DO this. Also, I want to read my book. Hmmm. Later.