My 52-year-old brain sometimes just wants to wander off and be 12 again. Not really 12, because then I’d have to get my mom to drive me places and I wouldn’t be able to drink, but I’d have more time to make art and read books and possibly even sleep and I’d stress out less about money and the to-do list and how to get people to get along and my job and who’s going to go buy more toilet paper (that last one? It’s me. I’m the one who’s going to go buy more toilet paper). I don’t want all the drama of middle-school existence. Ironic that, since I do have to deal with that every day, but at least it’s not ME who is in trouble or has to go to tutoring or didn’t finish their homework or whose friends are bugging her. Or worse.
This week is kicking my ass. It’s only Wednesday morning. UGH.
I did make scones last night for the next 8 breakfasts. That’s nice. They taste good. I had to go buy more butter to do it, because I didn’t realize we had so little in the fridge (my fault…should’ve checked on Sunday. I checked everything else), but for once, the store wasn’t crazy at 5 PM. So that was nice.
I graded nothing. Tutoring just takes everything out of me. I’m done with school when I get done with tutoring. I can’t. I just can’t. I walk in the door at home and I just need to pee and eat (oh body, you are a delight) and then sometimes I just want to cry because I still have to cook dinner and do other stuff and I am just done. It’s not just walking around…it’s being ON the whole day. I gave a makeup quiz during lunch too, so it was ON for too many hours. Way too many hours. Makes me want to build a pillow fort.
I made an animal fort instead…one at my feet…
Another one on the other foot…
The cat was behind me, then on the desk, then to the left.
Eventually I decided to trace. This is yard 3.
I got through most of the second to last figure. Not all the way. It was late, I was tired, my brain is just sucky right now.
Figure 3 needs the other arm and a head. Then I have one figure left and the stuff in the middle and a few things in the sky. I really should be doing some other things, but I don’t feel like it…grading for one. Sigh. I’ll get there. Today I will be trying to get kids to write an essay again. It’s not even really long…just 7 sentences. You’d think I was trying to torture them with they way they react. It’s exhausting.
Positive attitude ahead. I have some paper stuff I can work on. I can move from table to table and check in while working on the paper stuff. Maybe it will work. It works in my later classes…my morning classes are just a challenge. Tomorrow I don’t have to be in my morning classes…I should consider that a gift, I guess. We’ll see. (Comes back to room on fire…)
Kathy Nida 