Trying to Relax…

Yesterday was the day I did all the errands I blew off for days. I’m not quite on vacation yet. Although I did stay up past 1 AM last night to finish a book, but I have to be honest…I’ve been known to do that during the school year on a work night, so it’s really not an indicator of relaxed Kathy. I’m not there yet, for sure. It usually takes a week or two past the last day. A week or two of not having to plan or type something out for school or put something on a website or email a parent…then maybe my brain lets go of some of that work tension and lets me sit and draw, sit and read, watch a movie without guilt, make art without squawking about grades.

So I’m negotiating that space right now…the part where I just want to make art and nothing else. The house does still need cleaning and purging, as always. There are projects all over the place, the boychild chipping away at some of them. It’s nice to have help with that.

I still don’t feel like I’ve slept enough. I need to make up for 10 months of too-little sleep. Sure, I’m never gonna catch up. I know that.

Anyway, progress is being made on the quilt. I set up for sorting yesterday…

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It took 30 minutes just to find enough bins. I have more; they’re just in use. So I had to be a bit creative. And then I found another pile of them, so that was lame. Seriously, there are 20 of them.

Well, 21 if you count the one holding all the pieces…it’s full. Of 1954 pieces (or whatever it really is, because sometimes I miss pieces, so I have a’s and b’s). I think I did pretty well numbering this piece though…

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It took 2 hours and 18 minutes JUST to sort the fuckers. I did take a break in the middle. It’s funny though…I would move to a different section of the table because the majority of the pieces I was dealing with were in that section, and I can’t reach ALL the boxes from any one position, and then all the pieces would belong in another section. Sigh.

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So there was lots of piling little tiny pieces up on my hand by their number and then carefully walking over there, without any wind so they wouldn’t all blow away. Kinda crazy. Also means no fan on…

And the smaller pieces did a really shitty job of holding the fusible. This is frustrating. I mean, it’s still easy enough to deal with these…I lay them out on a colored box lid, so I can see the shapes, and then when I have a piece with no fusible attached, I either match it to its fusible piece or I redraw it. I just wish I didn’t have to do this…that it would stay attached.

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Because that is not a small number of small pieces.

Today, though, today…I get to start one of my favorite parts of the quiltmaking process…the fabric choosing. Although I have to clean up first…that table is where I lay them out. So yeah. That’s a bit of time…just to find homes for all of it. There’s piles of fabric under all that too. I didn’t feel like dealing with that last night.

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Maybe with another cup of tea.

Meanwhile, Kitten stalks all the windows in the house for this every night. This is her most exciting moment…

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My ugly bathroom window…one of the three thousand lizards that climb my house every night (I don’t know why they do this…because the house is warm still?)…a cat who will now come in my bathroom every night looking for this guy. Because it happens once every 6 months.

This is the book I stayed up late to finish…

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Uprooted by Naomi Novik. It was good. I liked it. There were a couple things that threw me off, but it was well-written and you cared about the characters. The boychild is still trying to get me to read her naval dragon series, but I’m not really a fan of naval wars. This was for book club…not sure what I need to read next. I already read the September book club book…and I think August is on order with the library. So wait. I can read what I want? Seriously? Those piles of books all over the house? I can just pick one and read it? Huh. Wow. Must be vacation. Seriously, I spend the school year trying to be caught up on book club and reading the occasional thing in between. This is strange.

I think I like it.

OK. Need to clean. And drink more tea. So I can iron…and then hike tonight. Looking forward to that. Should probably check batteries in headlamps…because no way are we hiking in afternoon heat…temps drop at 6 PM. Sounds like a good time to start. Then approximately (based on the last big quilt) 23 hours of ironing fabrics…without school every day, I should be able to pound that out in about 2 or 3 days (ha. that’s funny.). Or not. Let’s say by the end of the weekend? Ya think? Maybe? I can always set a goal that I don’t meet. Yes. This is how I relax. By setting deadlines. Crazy ones. It’s OK. These are art deadlines. I can handle those.

Clearing My Mind…

So today we will apparently lose 10 degrees in temperature, which will be nice. I’m also done with the chunk of copyediting I got up front. I’m waiting to hear from them about whether it was acceptable and if I’ll get more, but meanwhile, I don’t just rest on my laurels…I’ve got quilts to make! Well, after I get my eyes checked and run the 17 errands I didn’t run over the weekend, because I didn’t have time. But also, I finished cutting out all the Wonder Under pieces…

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There’s Midnight inspecting them. That box is full of pieces, 1900+ of them. The Wonder Under is not great on some of the small pieces, but I’ve dealt with that before. I can retrace or match tiny pieces of WU paper with tiny pieces of WU fusible. Both work. It took 13 hours to cut them all out, so a little less than I thought. I suspect the next phase, ironing onto fabric, will take 20 hours at least. And I need to straighten up in the studio first so I have room to do that.

So once I’m done with errands, I sort pieces, which will take an hour plus, and then clean up, and oh shit. I don’t have a background. Hmm. Crap. I hadn’t even thought of that. I know I have some big pieces that might work…or do I? I have one 2-yard piece. That’s not big enough. OK. It’s a good thing I started writing this before I left…I need a background.

This was while editing yesterday…he’s sitting on the chair behind me…

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I’m pretty sure he can’t get up there by himself.

Anyway, I’m hoping today is artistically successful…because I’ve been missing it and don’t want to get too far behind. Work is good for paying for college, but it’s not necessarily good for clearing my mind. And that’s an important part of the summer.

Managing the Heat…

So it’s not just warm. It’s hot. I’m managing with lots of ice water and fans on my body. I’d walk around naked, but the kids are here. Plus clothing sops up some of the sweat. (Ways to keep your neighbors away…and UPS…and the Jehovah’s)

I worked a good chunk of yesterday, copyediting, but also got close to done on the Wonder Under, which is good. I’m hoping to finish cutting today and then sort them, so maybe I can start ironing tomorrow, because it makes sense to wield a burning-hot device when the sun itself is trying to set me on fire. No really, it’s supposed to be like 8 degrees cooler tomorrow, so that’s almost bearable. Those 8 degrees are key. Girlchild has run off to the beach, and boychild is hunkered down under his fan in his room. We won’t be hiking or running or even venturing outside if we can help it. Well. I want to go to the gym. But it’s air-conditioned. Mostly because I want to read my book and I can’t do that right now without doing something else at the same time. I gots too much to do. (sigh. vacation.)

The box is almost full…

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I am halfway through the second-to-last yard, and the last yard is not filled up…and it’s mostly big pieces.

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I’ve done almost 11 hours of cutting so far…

Last night, girlchild made an awesome Father’s Day dinner for her grandpa and her dad. Taco bar!

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Perfectly followed by cookie ice-cream sandwiches. Mine were storebought (because I don’t eat chocolate)…they had handmade chocolate chip cookies.

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There were lots of dog moments, as always…

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That dog isn’t spoiled at all.

We talked about the front yard and how to prepare it for possible planting in the fall or winter. I drew this before I went to bed, but I don’t like it…

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So I’ll try again. But we are thinking about what to do next out there. Free labor…

The cats finally came back out of their hideyholes, now that Katie has gone back to her parents…

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Plus where there were people, there were fans. So that was a good thing for the furry beasts.

I have two more chapters to finish up today, plus gym time…and a few errands, but hopefully finishing up Wonder Under as well. It’s hot, so I can’t be expected to do much. I could go sit in my classroom (it’s air-conditioned…during the summer? I don’t know. I hope not.). But probably I’ll stay here in the oven that is my house. Drinking ice water. And hot tea. Just to confuse my brain. At least I don’t have a fur coat…managing the heat sucks.

Warm…

It’s warm here in my part of town, hovering around 100 degrees, although they say the “real feel,” which is the sweat dripping down my back, is 110 degrees. Ugh. Love summer out here in non-air-conditioned land. All the animals are flat and splayed out. I don’t blame them.

I worked most of yesterday, and will continue that today, as much as I can…waiting on a decision between style guide and opinions. Apparently not everyone works all weekend. Shocking!

I got no Wonder Under done yesterday, although I could have…but I decided to draw instead. I was driving and this drawing slammed full-force into my brain. You could almost feel the impact. I have a couple/several shows coming up that I need to make work for this summer, and so they are always floating up there in the netherwhere that fills my brain, percolating in a smelly corner, fires fanned by crazy-ass artistic fairies who form images and then squish them together until they are almost fully formed. So I drew. And this isn’t really it…this is the practice drawing…

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For one thing, the real one needs to be big, and this is the 9×12″ sketchbook. So I’ll do it again and stretch it out. I think the largest figure does actually need a head. And more of a torso. And something in the background. Maybe. But it’s the first official drawing of Summer 2016. So that’s cool.

I drew it while watching the second of the Somm movies about wine sommeliers and winemaking. I liked the first one better.

So here was my view most of yesterday (and continuing into today…).

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As time went on, the cat got longer and more into fondling the keyboard and the mouse…not helpful. Right now, she’s covering the number pad and blocking half of the mousepad and trying to whack my hand every time I touch the mouse. Must be warm…

Boychild decided to teach Simba about the pool…Calli already knows how to cool herself off…as is apparent…

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Simba was not thrilled, but did know how to doggy paddle (apparently some don’t). But then got out and rubbed his entire body in dirt. So he got his first bath from us right after. Apparently that was also traumatic. And exhausting.

The heat certainly does suck energy out of you. OK. Back to work. I will resurface for Father’s Day dinner and then see if I can get some of that Wonder Under done, despite the heat and the workload. I can’t actually finish the editing without a definitive answer, so that’s OK. It’s good to have an excuse not to work all night.

And maybe I’ll get another drawing in there too…

Not Vacationing…

Here’s one of those life mysteries: Cat starts to puke, you recognize that hurk hurk movement, you move her off the carpet and onto the tile, a nice big open spot, and then right before she hurls, she scuttles over and throws up ON something that just happened to be on the floor. What is that about?

So yeah, I know you’re thinking, “Oh good, she’s on summer vacation, she can draw and relax and we’ll see some great art coming out of her,” but I got the copyediting job, so I’m working. Like monster hours. My brain is not happy with me. My art brain even less so. I explain the whole dilemma of money in, money out, how much college is gonna cost. Nope. They don’t care.

I don’t blame them really. It’s been a rough year and I’m not giving them a break yet. I can’t. I’m not going to make it through the year if I don’t do more paying work. It’s frustrating, but it’s reality. Then ironically, because I was able to make more this year, they’ll assume I can make it again next year. Sigh.

Anyway, I’m glad to have the extra work. Really. Yesterday, I checked out of my classroom, watched the girl get her hair done while cutting out Wonder Under, and then worked for a good chunk of the afternoon. I gave myself a break at night, because I was pretty tired and didn’t think copyediting was a good plan, so now this morning, I’m panicked about how much I need to get done today and tomorrow. Not just copyediting either…I still have errands to run. Think I’m going to get those kids up and out for that.

So my room…was easy to straighten up, for some reason. I guess I get better every year?

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Everything had to be put away and locked up, or consolidated on counters. There’s some argument in the district that the walls should be empty. I’m gonna kick someone’s butt if they come after me on that. My walls are like that because I can’t stand plain walls…in my house, at school, at other people’s houses. Put stuff up! Give me something to look at. Especially if I’m staring at a computer screen for hours…I need somewhere more interesting on which to rest my poor eyes.

Girlchild had her hair done…looks like an alien here…

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And I got about 4 hours of cutting done between the hair appointment and my brain deadness in the evening. The box is getting full. I think I have three plus yards cut out at this point?

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So more than halfway through…9 hours and a bit. So yeah. I can do more tomorrow at Father’s Day dinner…because I can’t copyedit then. Maybe tonight. We’ll see. I still want to be getting this done, but I have a significant deadline on the copyediting. I’d rather be ahead on that and then take a break before the next batch of chapters comes in.

I’ve had 17 people ask me if I’m going anywhere this summer. I have no plans. I’d love to have plans. I don’t know how people afford these things honestly (laughing there). I’ll make an effort to go away for a few days I think, but not quite yet.

This is the view for the next few days. Music on…calendar to stare at…actually, the calendar to the left is much nicer for staring…it’s a Sue Spargo one. Lots of beautiful embroidery detail.

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Like I said, get through the work as quickly and efficiently as possible to get some free time. Focused. Not vacationing. Yet.

It May Take Me a Few Days…

Someone just texted me that phrase “cold hard facts are hard to ignore” as I told her the results of a particularly long and difficult email exchange with a parent (school ain’t over ’til the parent believes we can’t change any grades). But my editor brain wants to change one of the hard’s to difficult or something else, because they’re too close together. Ironically, although I’m on vacation, I just bid on a copyediting job that would start today and go hard and fast until some time next week. So much for rest and relaxation, eh? But I have to find some way to pay those college bills. At least the book is not about school (although it appears to be a textbook of sorts). I’ll know later today if I got it. That’s a tough one, because although I need the work, I really also need time OFF.

Oh well. This is how it rolls. So I had quilt class last night, after teacher last-day party and counseling, and I didn’t feel well, so we basically sat and talked, which I think teachers need to do on the last day of school, spill it all so you don’t have to take it home with you. And I got nothing done. Until I got home and felt better with a cup of tea inside me, and then managed to spend an hour or so cutting out tiny pieces of Wonder Under.

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I don’t even think I’ve cut out 2 full pieces yet of the 6. Yeah, I’m a little behind. What can I do? I’ll be a lot behind if I get the copyediting job. I just checked…I’ve been trimming Wonder Under for just under 5 hours and I barely have 2 yards done, so based on that, the estimate I made earlier of 15 hours seems pretty accurate.

I came out of the office at some point to this…

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Yes, she has two animals ON her and another very close. And she doesn’t seem to mind.

Really it’s impossible NOT to have multiple animals on you at the moment.

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He’s a very lovey dog. Here the boychild has whispered him to sleep…

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This dog is good baby experience. He’s freakin’ hyper all over the place, then gets cranky, then wants to bite all your parts, and then falls asleep because you’re rubbing his belly.

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Anyway. Today is technically my first day of summer (yay!), so I should use it wisely. Although honestly, I still need to go to school to check out and then watch the girlchild get her hair dyed and cut (thought about trying to cut out Wonder Under there, but it’s really not set up for it), then I have something to do tonight. And if I get the job, I’ll be copyediting all afternoon. Maybe I can schedule drawing breaks. Or nap breaks, because I’m still exhausted. Sitting on the deck breaks. Reading my book breaks. Holy shit I really need a break breaks.

Because I can’t even think coherently at the moment and I just posted about five puppy pictures, proof that I have no working brain. OK, off to work to figure out if my room is clean enough, bring my plants home so I can kill them with neglect here, and hand my computer over so they can try to make it work better.

It may take me a few days to feel like I’m on vacation.

I Got This…

It’s the last day of school. Can you hear the party going off in my head? I’ve spent the last three days thinking today would never come. Silly really. It always does. My room’s not ready. I’m already scheduling family hikes…well, after the crazy heat wave comes through.

I got nothing done last night…well, except dinner and a card game…Gloom…where you try to make all the other families happy and yours miserable.

After playing (and almost winning the second round), I was so tired I couldn’t do much at all. I pulled the scissors and Wonder Under towards me on the couch and then just sat there. I made a cup of tea at one point, and still, just sat there. I love it when my body gives me those obvious clues that I need rest and recovery and relaxation.

I’m listening. I am. I just can’t do that yet. Some time on Friday maybe? Certainly it was nice to come home yesterday and not have to really think about school. That’s the part I love best about summer break. School is off my mind. Until they email me about something I have to deal with. Seems like one of the trainings I thought I might have to do over the summer is a webinar. Oh please please…don’t make us all meet in a room to watch a webinar. Let me do it on my own. (They don’t trust us to do it)

So a short summary of summer art projects: one small commissioned owl, one giant-ass time-consuming Earth Mother, two largish new projects that only barely exist as ideas (these aren’t due until late Fall, which helps), one coloring book page AND managing that project, one nightstand collaboration, one oldie but goodie that just needs quilting and binding. I think that’s it. No minor thing, all that.

I would hope to have the big one and the owl done in July, which means I need to start drawing the other two. Which is FINE, because I’ve been missing drawing like crazy. I’m dreaming of sitting on the deck with a cup of tea and some music, drawing like a crazy woman. First coloring-book meeting is next week. Nightstand starts after the 22nd. It’s all good. I got this.

One Less Problem

So you know how you hear one of the animals puking in the morning and you think, oh hell no, I don’t want to deal with that, but you also have a few dogs lying around and you know that if you don’t deal with it, they will, which sometimes is a good thing, but if I think about it at all, it grosses me out, so I have to go out there and clean up whatever it is by whomever is the puker?

Well that’s this morning.

I’m exhausted, I have all the stress signs except a twitchy eye (that’s probably coming), and luckily I only have to teach for three periods today. I hate this last week because everyone is showing movies and I’m still teaching STDs and how the hell are we supposed to do anything BUT let them do whatever they want when grades were already due and OMG was that fun, because of the two boys who only JUST realized they were failing and were not failing by much, but didn’t turn in any makeup work at all and were missing multiple warmups (easy fix, seriously).

THE DRAMA. I’m a little over it. Awards ceremony today, which is why there are 504 cookies, 10 gallons of juice, and 500 napkins in my prep room. Never let me volunteer for that shit again. Yeah. I know. I will. Someone’s got to do it. Then tomorrow is just survival.

I hate the last week of school.

I did come home and go to the gym and finish my book. Those were good things. And ate a decent meal. And then settled down on the couch with Outlander and a puppy, with a big fat dog at my feet…

I cut out one full yard and part of the next one…

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It’s slow going. Especially when I think that I have 5 more yards to cut out. The pieces are in the bin and the trash is on the lid.

Puppy slept and barked and slept and tried to bite and got distracted and slept. The kids found a tick on him today, reminding me that he’s not on any flea/tick medicine. One more thing to deal with.

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Side view…cutting on my lap, where the dog wanted to be.

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Alas, the cutting must happen, dear puppy, or I will never get to the next phase, which is one of my favorites…the ironing of fabric to the Wonder Under. I wish I could guess when I might get to that, but at the moment, I can’t imagine getting 15 hours done any time soon. I’ll probably get an hour or so done tonight. Thursday is a clusterfuck followed by a meeting. Friday is up in the air. We check out and usually it doesn’t take long, but sometimes it does. And I have stuff Friday afternoon and evening. I think at some point I will just collapse and sleep for three days. Hopefully that will wait until after school ends, though it seems questionable right now that I will make it that long.

This is the song that’s banging through my head…think on that…

Weighing in…on…

So I’ve had a few days to process all the crazy around the shooting in Orlando. I think it’s true that we have now seen so much gun violence and gender and racial hatred, and we’ve seen so little change in our policies, that it’s hard to even say anything, to even think…well what DOES need to change and HOW do we make it change, when we so obviously can’t even agree that a huge part of the problem is the gun itself and access to it, and the other huge problem is how much hate there is in our country. And there’s one presidential candidate who seems to be making that intensely worse. It’s hard to have any hope when you’re staring at all of that. My students were asking me who I voted for in the primaries, and I won’t tell them, but I do tell them that if Trump is elected, me and all my smart women friends will be in an internment camp (I read that somewhere)…because the likes of the Donald doesn’t like women who say no or argue. Hell, I’ve been around men like that in my life. One was a boss. That was a hard few years.

Anyway. It’s weighing on me, as I’m sure it’s weighing on many of you. I don’t see an easy solution as long as people are convinced weapons are necessary to their safety. And that a religion they don’t understand is at fault…I am amused at the anti-Muslim sentiment from people who are also anti-gay. You hate both? And yet you use the deaths of one group to try to oust the other? Fear is such an ugly stupid thing.

So yeah. Trying to survive the last few days of school with all that…and yeah, we will be talking about that and Brock the Rapist and consent during sex ed this week.

Meanwhile, hiking seems a good solution to the feeling and stress parts…we’re down to one car and it’s not particularly large, but we piled three dogs and three adults into it…then Simba tried to tie up the boychild.

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This is one I haven’t done in a while, Old Sweetwater Bridge…because I think of it as a mostly flat and not very long trail.

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There’s been a lot of water this year, so there are new plants…

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And eventually, they showed me the hilly part, which I didn’t know was there. We came in through that river valley. So now I have another hike to add to the local within-a-5-minute-drive options…

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They’ve gone in and fixed trails and added signage in the last year or so, which is why it’s easier to find existing real trails that don’t just wander off into the side of a hill.

Coming back, dogs were tired and hot…so were we…

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But it really does help clear the brain.

Grades were apparently due yesterday (it’s always Tuesday except when it’s not!)…and everything is done except for one kid, who may show up with stuff today. This morning hopefully…

I traced the small owl onto Wonder Under…

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Then I cut out Wonder Under pieces for the big quilt while we watched Deadpool as a family. It was just as good the second time around.

Simba as a neck warmer…

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He is a very lovey dog, when he’s not trying to bite you. Still working on that part of the training.

OK. Maybe a drawing will come out of the other stuff…not that it solves anything except the chaos in my brain. Still working on the other part of the solution. Because Australia’s version isn’t staring us in the face or anything. Sigh.

The Light…

Amusing that I last posted about blurry, because now my camera won’t take anything BUT blurry pictures (it’s not me…it’s the technology). Frustrating. I kill cameras quickly. I don’t even think it’s a year old, so I’ll chase down the warranty and see what I can do. Meanwhile, the phone takes OK pictures, so I can use that.

There are four days of school left. I have 700 things left to do in four days, but I’m sure it will be OK. Most of my grades are done…which is good, because they’re due tomorrow. I finished printing all the certificates. I still have a field trip today, teaching tomorrow and most of the next day, an award ceremony, and that hellish last day when we have our kids for just over 3 hours with nothing real to do.

I worked my butt off yesterday getting stuff done because I could see the light at the end of the tunnel…the vacation light. The light of no more grading. Of no more lesson plans. Of no more trying to get all the tech to work and the kids to behave. Such a relief this year. OK. Probably every year I feel this way; I just forget it until it’s upon me.

One of my quilts is in an article in Textile Fibre Forum…

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An article by Tanya Brown on Censorship in Art…with my One Paycheck nice and big in the front…

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Of course, this picture is blurry. My fault. It’s a good article, especially for those who make abstract or less in-your-face art (although I don’t consider nudity “in your face”)…if you don’t realize this is happening because it doesn’t happen to you. Certainly the notion of ART in the quilt world is still troubled. Hopefully that will change over time.

I finished tracing Wonder Under last night for the new big quilt…

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Just over 19 hours to trace…I think I thought it would be 20 hours, so not a bad guess. There are 6 yards of Wonder Under that now need to be trimmed. The last two pieces had lots of big pieces on them from the hair and the sun. In fact, I don’t think I filled all of the last piece. So I’ll start cutting out tonight. I wanted to be done cutting out “by the time I got out of school”. Well technically my last day is Friday, but it usually only takes me about 20 minutes to check out…so we’ll see. I’m figuring 15 hours to cut the pieces out, so that’s a lot to do this week, but I am mostly done with school crap…so that will help. Being able to come home and do NOTHING that is school-related…that is bliss. Seriously. I can’t even tell you.

I started working on Owl 3.0 as well…a commission pulled from the most recent drawing. There’s an owl on the left side, under a rib and a Fallopian tube. I drew the whole thing out and numbered it.

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It’s 102 pieces, which is not bad. A lot of them will be the same color, so it won’t take long to pick fabrics and iron. I’m going to start tracing it tonight before I put the light table top back on.

Puppy was deeply asleep while I graded yesterday. I guess he got tired out on Saturday and Sunday morning.

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We are up to three dogs for the week. We were a little worried because my parents’ dog, Katie (on the right), had been bullying Simba when we visited on Sunday, but they’ve been fine…

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Calli is the alpha dog (well, behind the humans). Simba is a spaz and the older dogs school him. Katie is kind of a freak sometimes, but they’ve been doing well with three adults to entertain them.

So yeah, not the most relaxing week, but it helps to see into the future, where sleep happens and reading books and shee-it. I keep dreaming of the same stuff. No Jamaican beaches and fruity cocktails. Just don’t make me get up early and teach for a few weeks. Please.