People and Carbs…

This week is just never relaxing. I’ve been to the grocery store four or five times, the pet store twice (I know, that one is my fault for adopting a new kitten), plus trying to catch up on cleaning (ha!) and yardwork (double ha!), and to finish grading? (triple ha!) …nothing is happening the way I’d planned. What’s new? Nothing. It’s always like this. I try to steal moments for reading or artmaking, but there’s other stuff that snuck in…like all the emails about stuff I needed to do that I totally ignored for the last three weeks? Yeah, those. And the four things that need renewing, but now I can’t find the renewal emails. Ugh. And then being invited to be on a cool website…awesome, but it required an hour of photos with the boychild (thank goodness he has a clue, because I don’t) and I’m sure he spent a ton of time resizing, and then I had to find art photos too and send all of them, plus fill out three pages of forms. I appreciate the opportunity, but I don’t have extra time lying around for all of that. So the bathrooms are still dirty and so are the floors. Oh well.

The kitten is adjusting. She has a name finally…Scribble. She’s like a little ADHD and very balls to the wall with the other cats. Right now, she’s sleeping, after racing around for 5 hours this morning. She’s definitely a curious little thing and won’t let her inability to jump high enough stop her.

We started out with my hanging out with her in a room with no other cats, but once we let her out…man, she didn’t want to stay in.

That said, she’s not banging on the door to be let out when I do put her in the room, which is when I leave the house, because I don’t entirely trust the other cats with her yet.

This was a very tentative moment between Scribble and Nova. Both wanted my lap.

I think we’ll all be OK in the long run…it just might take a while. Certainly last night, when Scribble was all puffed up, jumping sideways, I’m Big! I’m Big! toward Bowie and he’s just staring at her like she’s the scariest thing in the world…I think Bowie is having the hardest time adjusting. But he does appreciate an animal that will run around and parkour like he does, so he’ll come around.

One of the boychild’s photos.

OK, so artwise, I’m mostly still cutting things out.

Which is not particularly fast…

I really wanted to be ironing things together by now. Oh well. I’ve got another 2-3 hours of trimming, I think. I’m going to go do some more in a bit. I might do some yardwork first, before it gets dark.

I also spent a couple of hours at ceramics on Monday…and did most of this. It’s very relaxing.

I need to fix the cloud and a couple of other spots, but I think otherwise it’s ready to fire. I was hoping to get there today as well, but so far, that hasn’t happened? Maybe in an hour. We’ll see.

Found this in the yard.

Such a perfect mushroom.

This…I know some people are leaving for legit reasons, like being afraid of deportation…that’s a real thing and I don’t blame people for leaving. Detention or deportation to Venezuela or whatever other psychotic thing this government has come up with are legitimate fears. Go. Be well. Come back when the crazy is over (knock on wood that this ends at some point).

But if you’re a rich white American-born citizen and you’re leaving? You’re not staying and yelling with the rest of us? WTF. Seriously. I guess it’s easier than living here and being stressed about it, but those of us who don’t have tons of money and the ability to just up and go, we’re here and loud and not putting up with it, and y’all with money need to stay and be part of the fight…OR…take those fucking billionaires with you, the problematic ones, the racist misogynist ones. Take them. I mean, we can’t get rid of the ones who aren’t even here legally and have committed multiple financial crimes, but we’re trying to deport Native Americans. It’s just nuts. And if there’s no one with power and money left behind to yell louder than the rest of us, that’s on you, what happens next. You ran away? So stay away. Because you’re making it worse. You’re not helping.

Sigh. This is a frustrating world we live in. By the way, yes, we’re celebrating Thanksgiving, but there’s so many cultural things wrong with this holiday. So much that’s made up. So much violence toward the native cultures that was just shoved aside for the pilgrim story. So I’ll be thankful for a hike tomorrow, and thankful for spending time with family, and thankful for good food (although at the moment, the thought of people and lots of carbs is not really something I want…I’ll get there. But going to the store yet again today made me want to pillow fort for about a week), but remembering all along that we white people are appropriating disease-carrying xenophobes who don’t really belong here. Positive thoughts to all. It’s a rough week for a lot of people.

Teacher Dreams

Wrong day. I’m all discombobulated. Usually I work Fridays. Well, I still worked Friday; I graded all day. But not at school and not with kids. I finished one big assignment; today, I started the second one and got side-tracked by the possibility of a new kitten tonight plus having to clean out the girlchild’s room for new kitten AND girlchild (not at the same time), and then took all those assignments (packets in plastic bags, cat toys!) back to school and went for a hike and then came back here and continued to try to organize quilts and the room. Didn’t finish. I can’t get a handle on storage at the moment. I have some ideas for boxing stuff up and putting it in the garage at this point. I don’t know that I still need all the books I used when I started teaching school. I don’t use them any more. Not quite ready to totally get rid of them, but close. Because I use the internet now instead of books. So much more. But organizing takes time and this week off never has enough time to do a lot. Too much family and other obligations. Plus grading is always an issue. It’s not enough time off for all of it.

Anyway, so I’m still in the stage of hoping to get a lot done but haven’t gotten a lot done. Fun times. I forgot to write yesterday because it didn’t seem like Friday. I don’t know what day it was, but it wasn’t Friday.

So Wednesday night, I ironed things down…

And didn’t freakin’ finish. So frustrating.

Thursday night, I finished.

18 hours and 54 minutes, 152 fabrics. That’s a lot. There were a lot of small detailed things in this quilt…stuff I love, but that is time-consuming on all levels.

Here’s everything that needs to be cut out.

And then I barely started cutting things out.

It never looks like much. Last night, I did some more…

We went out and watched friends of ours play in a different band, so we got home at 10:30, but I still had about an hour in me.

This is the Chameleons, which is really the lead guy and then whoever he decides he wants to play along with him…

But three of those people are in the Radio Thieves, so we got free tickets and hung out and watched them and talked to some friends, and then skipped the main band, because we’ve seen them before and we were both tired. The Man did actually go to work yesterday; and I am tired all the time, so there’s that. There will be no sleeping in during break. Cats don’t care that I need more sleep, and I stay up later, so I’m fucked. Ah well.

I did manage to gently chisel the base off the head; I used the base to hold up the head in the kiln and the clear glaze dripped down and attached them.

And managed to seat the head, although not quite how it originally fit.

There’s going to be acrylic paint on this thing. No way not too. And there’s a lower part too. Anyway, I’m hoping to epoxy these three pieces together, but also to get the tree for the top of the head into the glaze kiln too. And add the wire for the coathanger, and then design and make the little quilt that goes in the belly area. There’s so many hours in this thing, it’s insane. It’s definitely been a learning experience. So many things broke off so many times.

I did hike about 3 miles today to make up for not moving at all yesterday.

It was nice and cool out.

Threatening rain with no rain.

As I was walking, I thought I saw something up on the hillside, but it didn’t move. I even walked forward a little ways and then came back, decided it was a tree stump, then took a photo of it as far as my phone camera could zoom, and still couldn’t decide. It still hadn’t moved. I hiked on and figured I’d check the spot on the way back.

Of course, looking at it now, that’s a fucking coyote, but at the time, I really was seeing a tree stump. My eyes vs the camera’s eyes. It seemed too dark to be a coyote.

I got home to a beautiful sky.

We had a lovely cool, rainy in bits but not horrible, week. This coming week holds no rain, and then it comes back the following week. It’s pretty cold at night (for me)…definitely in my sweats and socks and slippers stage. I must be getting old, because my neck gets cold, but I hate turtlenecks. I have a couple of scarves, one a friend made and one the Man brought back from Denmark? I think? They are doing the trick.

I saw these on a friend’s reels and loved them.

Please pause. I shall return in a better place. I will be pillow-forting for a few days first. Don’t mind me.

Yup. That too. Bingewatching bad TV, reading books, and dreaming about all the things I could finish if I just stopped sleeping and eating and peeing. Really.

These sweet boos.

It must be cold for them to not be killing each other. And I’m about to shake up their existences with another cat. Woo!

This is too real.

Anyway. There’s no school all next week, and I am thankful for that. I am thankful for being done with the packets, and for getting a new furry baby tonight. Whichever one I pick. I was interested in one and then someone else had gotten in before me (this was the third time it had happened), and I’d been offered a slightly younger one, and figured it would be fine from the description, and then the 3rd one came back up as available, so I’m meeting both tonight and somehow I’m supposed to decide. Which is why there are two carriers in the back of the car right now, just in case. Then home to acclimatize whomever ends up coming home with us, some cutting stuff out, some kitten time, more cutting stuff out, more kitten time. You know how that goes. And grading. I should do more of that unfortunately. Ugh. But also relax and hike and read and pee when I want. Plus drinking my tea warm instead of cold. Teacher dreams.

Long Shot…

OK, so struggling to make art, but I have managed to get into a new show, get rejected for the first time ever to a ceramics show (!)…also never gotten into one, but that’s OK, and mostly packed up another quilt to send to a show. Plus organized photos and sizes for a 2-person show in Virginia this spring, which needed to be done as well. Organization is hard. Art management is hard. Having to be at a school board meeting to persuade the damn people in charge of the money that we are the resource they should be supporting? Also hard. Followed by an early meeting this morning and tomorrow morning, also hard. Plus my knee was acting up yesterday; actually had to wear a knee brace all day…and we did a lab, so it was kinda necessary that I be mobile. I don’t know what’s up with my knee, but it can fuck off. I do lots of physical stuff to stabilize it, and then it just randomly decides…nope…today I’m not gonna. Ugh.

Anyway…I did do art-related stuff. Monday night, I sorted all the Wonder Under, so technically I’m ready to iron to fabrics…

Hopefully tonight? I need to finish packing this quilt up so I can get a shipping estimate, and then I need to clean up the fabrics from the previous quilt. That might take all my available time tonight, but I hope not.

I made it to ceramics after finishing grades on Monday afternoon. For once, they canceled a staff meeting so we could get actual required work done. I had spent a goodly chunk of the weekend getting grades done, so I finished what little was left and headed for the studio. My piece is waiting for the head to go in the glaze fire and my tree to go in the bisque fire. The rest of it is at home, waiting to be put together and fancified. Fabric and paint I think. So I wanted to try out some of the things I had listed as want-tos before…one of which was sgraffito frames. I may have thought myself into crazytown again though. Instead of just doing a plain square or rectangle, I got fancy. And complicated.

Twice.

We’ll see how it goes. It’s something new anyway. And smaller. By far.

And yes, I entered my first ceramics show ever and got rejected. I’m OK with that. It was a long shot. But you know, in the beginning of my quilt career, Quilt National was a long shot too…so we all get there.

This sweet weird thing, Why. Not., got into Art Quilt Elements.

I entered one of my big complicated pieces and then two smaller pieces that were not as complicated, both in construction and concept, and the big one did not get in. Which is fine. I made this piece in between two big complicated political pieces. And it is its own kind of complicated. It will be at the Wayne Art Center in Wayne, PA, opening the same weekend I’ll be in Virginia at the closing ceremonies of my 2-person show. Same coast! For once. But too far to get to, I think.

Anyway. My art travels. Sometimes I get to travel too. Just not as often.

OK. Today. Sigh. I don’t think I got into pilates this afternoon, but I’m taking my stuff just in case. I have an annoying meeting this morning, then am getting kids through ideas about force and mass and motion all day. Then hopefully pilates and then book club. I know I read the book, but I don’t remember which one it was. As always. One day at a time. Then hopefully getting this space clean enough to start the fun task of picking fabrics. I really do enjoy that part. So that’s a good thing.

Finished One Thing

I didn’t forget to write Friday. My team texted me that we were meeting before the meeting, and it was in about 20 minutes. So I sped everything up and thought, oh hey, I’ll write Saturday morning. Ha! I graded Saturday morning…and afternoon…and then Sunday evening. Grades are due tomorrow and I’m almost done, which is a relief, even though it all starts up again almost immediately. I already have four assignments from last week for the new trimester, which starts today. It’s fine. Really. This is how the job is. I could do without all the last-minute extra crap (this week is full of it), but that doesn’t seem to be changing this year. So I didn’t write Saturday. I completely forgot, honestly, until this morning. I have a routine, so when I bounce out of it, I forget everything.

I don’t think will get better in the future unfortunately.

So I did finish trimming Wonder Under. I should’ve finished Saturday, but the Man had a show and I worked right up until it happened and then went and came back and had a snack and went to bed. So I finished last night. Here’s Wednesday night…

Thursday night…

I think that was the last bit of the fourth yard? Maybe?

Friday night (Halloween), I finished the fourth yard and started the last 1/3 yard.

Then last night, I finished that.

Exactly 7 hours to trim them all. Now to sort them tonight and then start ironing to fabric. The office needs to be straightened up first. I did have the presence of mind this weekend to buy some possible background fabrics, so I have that going for me. Ironing to fabrics tomorrow probably? Although tomorrow is a school board meeting. I’ll be sitting around for 3 hours. Fun times. Maybe they could just pay us enough to cover the healthcare increases? That would be nice. All my other expenses have increased. The money stuff is stressful.

I’m not sure how to prepare for a dying empire.

This one made me laugh…the second part.

Both good though. I have to say, my co-teacher and I have beat the AI issue by not letting them have computers during academic assignments…or running them in assessment mode, so they can’t open anything else but the test. It’s saved us that stress point. Not sure the other stress points aren’t still there (it takes so much time to grade their writing). Working on that. Always.

And this. I love this.

And leave me alone. OK, I mostly was left alone this weekend, minus the Man’s show, where he wore a silly hat…

And the one art meeting I had this weekend, to vote on new members. Interesting conversation about being a master craftsperson but having no new ideas since the 1960s. Not sure how to deal with that. What’s more important? If they are equally so, then are they in the group? Good points made by all.

The Man found a slug on Simba after I’d put him in bed…

We released it to the wild. Glad we found it before lights out.

I do worry about people getting fed.

I’ll be looking up donation info for the San Diego Food Bank later today. It’s on my to-do list, after teaching new vocabulary and finishing grades and maybe going to ceramics. We’ll see. Those are all first-world problems, although the one where I do my job is what makes sure I have food (and money to donate). So I’ll keep doing that. I can’t believe how people are spinning some of this stuff. But please, build a fucking ballroom. Finance Argentina. Tariff Canada. Deport some US citizens. Wander all over the carpet with your post-stroke gait, while the rest of the world looks on with amusement tinged with horror. Meanwhile, I’ll be wearing red so my district realizes that their piddly offer (less than cost of living) is gonna piss us off, in a classroom, saying ‘6-7’ as many times as I can while trying to educate the future generations to think critically. Someone should.

There Is No Free.

Ah the challenge of existence. In one class, every time I say the word ‘job’, half the class gasps and groans. Oh hey, I get it. That’s how I feel at the moment too. I was getting ready for bed last night, and four separate student emails came in and I ignored all of them. They had all already been answered during the day. I will have to deal with all of them again today, because apparently once (or in one case, 17 times) is not enough. I think maybe 10% of what I say in class sinks in for most kids. That may be normal but it’s also exhausting. I’m trying to get caught up on grades, but have to deal with all this other stuff: this kid wants to move to a class with their friends (no; so many other reasons why that kid can’t move), this other kid wants to move to be with HIS friends (still no, not jamming everyone into my morning class to accommodate your friendships), this third kid wants to move with her friend and sister (also no), I finally email counseling and tell THEM to start saying no (OMG what a load of crap). Then the same kid who emailed 6 times on Saturday, 2 times last night, questions that were already answered during class…every day since last Tuesday. I take ashwaganda for all that. It’s not enough. Also, you should teach and plan and grade and fill out forms for this kid and that kid and then go to meetings for this other kid, and that other kid (there’s three this week) and then there’s an emergency meeting on the one day you thought you’d be free. Ha! Not free. There is no free.

Aack. That’s probably a statement for the year now. And for some groups, always. Land of the Free, my ass. I just watched yet another video of ICE hauling off an American citizen. And you know what? I don’t even think they should be hauling off someone who is illegal. Unless they’ve committed heinous crimes, which most of them haven’t. So many of them are in the process of being here legally, or they came here legally and we changed the damn rules on them. So stupid. They pay taxes. They contribute to a working economy. They are part of a community. This shit is stupid.

Really trying to keep my chill today. It’s a lab and I have a few kids who lose their minds with labs. I need the materials to stay usable and unbroken today. Oh, we also had to fire our teacher’s aide yesterday, a student, because of his other behaviors. So now we don’t even have that. Frustrating. It’s fine. School is always some level of frustrating. I’m just finding it overly so this year. Again. Sigh.

Art! I am finally shipping my newest quilt off to its owner. Got the photos back. Here is Humanity Is in Your Hands…

Lots of crazy stuff going on in this quilt.

First quilt I’ve had someone give birth to the Statue of Liberty. NOT the first quilt with ICE in it, scarily.

First quilt with ALL of the planets; I’ve done some of them before, but not all of them.

Anyway, hoping the owner likes it. She’s good about showing the work she owns, which I greatly appreciate. On to the next one! I’m still trimming stuff.

Didn’t get a full hour the last two nights. Stupid day job.

But there’s progress. I’m in the 2nd of the 4+ yards. I thought originally I could be done by tomorrow night, but ha! Life says no. I’m supposed to have a finished approximate size by November 5. I think it will be very approximate. Pro? I need a background and the damn store isn’t open late enough for me to go until Saturday, so I’ll be doing that. And not wasting time trying to iron things without a background fabric to compare the fabrics to. I’m so discombobulated this week that my weekly bullet journal isn’t done yet. It’s fucking Wednesday. I’m sure there’s shit I need to be doing (besides what’s in my phone calendar); I’m just not sure what it is (order needles. vote. buy slats and boxes to ship a quilt or two.).

I wanted to go to ceramics yesterday, but I needed to buy the stuff to ship the quilt and then put a label on it and pack it up and prep the box. The Man is being nice enough to have them pick it up from his work, because it needs insurance paperwork and picking up from school is problematic. Today is pilates, which I really really need. Tomorrow is now an emergency union meeting. Luckily it’s on Zoom, so I might be able to pull off going to ceramics AND sitting through a Zoom (we’ll see if that’s a thing). Because the head is out of the bisque kiln and ready for glazing.

When they trimmed the trees down below, there’d been a squirrel up in those trees and we were worried. We don’t see many squirrels around here. Well here’s one. And there was another one in that tree, so maybe it’s the same one? I don’t know. But I never trim all the trees at once (who has that kind of money?), so there’s always somewhere for them to live.

Fence squirrel.

You know, every morning, I take deep breaths and try to find some zen for school.

Also that’s Newton’s third law, which I was writing a worksheet for yesterday.

It’s Spirit Week at school and we’re supposed to wear a specific thing each day, and for some weird reason, the staff is competing with the kids (no one is winning). Today for staff is supposed to be something with 6-7 on it (if you’re not a teacher or living in a house with a teacher or living in a house with a kid, you probably have no idea how annoying 6-7 is right now), so I refused…I’m twinning like the kids are. But I would have worn this (and gotten in big trouble for it).

Tomorrow is pajamas and luckily it won’t be 97 degrees tomorrow like it’s supposed to be today. Fall, my ass.

And this…

We could feed the poor if we weren’t assholes.

OK. Sigh. Lab. Newton’s first law, inertia. Crashing cars into each other. Should be fun. Then pilates, then grading, then shit, I think I have to cook again (ugh this week sucks), and finally cutting things out. Maybe earlier because of the last two nights not successfully getting an hour. I will GET AN HOUR. Oh man, I hope so.

Forgotten All the Things…

OK well that was a lot. I think I graded for 9 hours yesterday and didn’t finish. Need to adjust something. Might be me. Not sure how though. OK, so what art did I do? I finished tracing pieces on Wonder Under…

Well, I traced Friday night and almost finished…and then traced Saturday night and finished…

It took almost 13 hours to do about 4 1/3 yards of Wonder Under.

Then last night, I started trimming it and didn’t even finish a yard.

Also, that’s just under an hour, because that’s all I’ve been able to pull off the last week or month or eon. And this week, I think I have to be at school early 3 days, so I really should go to bed early the nights before, but I never do. Sleep is so HARD y’all. I just am not very good at it. I finish meditating, I’m all chill and relaxed and ready for sleep and then my brain yells “HIGHLIGHTERS! THE KIDS WILL NEED HIGHLIGHTERS TOMORROW!” and I’m like, Brain, you could have told me that tomorrow morning and it would have been fine, but no, “HIGHLIGHTERS!”. Ugh. Anyway, I will be trimming most of the week. I did get my quilt photos for the last one back from the photographer yesterday, but was too busy grading and cooking dinner to look at them. I’ll do that tonight and pack up the quilt and ship it to the new owner, which is exciting in itself.

In other cool quilt news, Kathy Ford was nice enough to photograph my quilt Portrait of One Self at Quilts=Art=Quilts this weekend.

Apparently it is right up front at the entrance, which is cool.

I wish I could have been there, but I also greatly appreciate the photos. Sometimes my work goes to shows and I never see it in the exhibit and I wonder if it’s actually there. Of course it is, but it doesn’t seem real if I don’t see it. So there it is!

I also went to the ceramics studio on Friday and did a copper wash, mostly wiped off, on the base and the upper torso, and then a light clear satin over that, and then put it in the pile of stuff to be fired. I also put the head in for a bisque fire, and fixed the tree again. Hey, compared to all the fixes on the upper torso, this is nothing.

Remind me to work on something smaller next time. Way smaller. Yeah, I know, it’s not in my nature.

I also went to the dentist on Saturday, where they did this weird 3D scan of my teeth.

Creepy shit.

And then I graded for a million hours.

Fun times. We’re having to go back and reteach some stuff, like the difference between evidence and inference, and where explanation goes (not in your claim), so they can write about science without making it sound like a narrative of their lives (tough one that). One of the more frustrating parts about teaching 8th grade is the obsession with getting Principal’s Honor Roll so they can sit on the stage for promotion. Except they’re learning new skills and it’s really hard to get an A on a new skill in the first month of doing that skill. And they’re so obsessed with the A that they can’t focus on what they need to do to get there. Anyway. It’s a challenge for them (and me) to get them there. Hence 6 emails from one kid and then one from his mom, all on Saturday, until I sent one back about hey, school is about learning. If he already knew everything, he wouldn’t need to come here. And some more stuff. Parental pressure like that is also not helpful. But also, it’s only going to get harder from here on out and I’m not sure he has the A in him. We’ll see. But that’s the point, right? That they grow and progress? Not that they are an A straight off the bat. Sigh.

So I graded in the car as a lovely person drove me to Huntington Beach for a meeting that I also graded through (I contributed to the meeting, so don’t think I blew that off…it was a lot of discussion of how to meet and get members moving forward, which was necessary but not fun), and then graded on the way back. I think I finally quit in Oceanside on the way back…so from 9 AM (I left my house at 8:30) to probably 3:30, and then I picked up my quilt and went home and graded some more. So yeah, at least 9 hours just on Sunday. Another 3 or 4 on Saturday. And an hour or two on Friday. I’m not done with that assignment either, although I didn’t do that in the car/at the meeting mostly. I did all the other things that needed grading. So three homework assignments, all their warmups for the week, plus essays, probably about 100 of them. I have 18 left…that’s probably 2 hours. Seriously. Ugh. I took one picture at the person’s house of this really cool piece of art…

I meant to ask if it was the same person who made the piece I saw at Sebastopol over the summer. I’ll email her and ask.

Otherwise, my weekend was a bunch of memes when I would take a break from grading…

It’s weird. And this really bugs me.

And harassing people who are following the law to be here. Or were BORN here. That’s fun. I totally want my money going to that when you can’t fund special education any more. Or rural schools.

I would love a Schoolhouse Rock song for this…

Someone will do it.

Yeah. That.

And lastly, though I’m going to BREATHE in instead of BREATH in…I think this is how my week is gonna go.

It’s been like that since the beginning of the school year.

Today, my coteacher is out, so I’m not sure whether I can copy the things I need to copy. We couldn’t meet Friday because she had to sub our prep period, because teachers called out without any warning and we couldn’t get subs. I get emergencies, but also, leave sub plans. Have emergency sub plans. I do. I also need to grade those 18 essays, but get kids through a review of what the fuck a CER is, because they’ve forgotten all the things. Next year, we’ll do this earlier for goodness’ sake. We will NOT assume they were taught things last year. Even if we’re the ones that put all those things into the 7th-grade calendar. It’s fine. Really. I love reteaching when I have a shit ton of content to get through before the state test. Then staff meetings about a debrief of something we didn’t do because they never opened the list of sign ups for us to be observed doing it. So yeah, that’ll be a fun, “hey y’all dropped the ball yet again”, in fact I don’t even know if you know where the ball is. Then ceramics today? Or tomorrow? I can’t decide, so I’ll take my stuff with me…I think it needs to be tomorrow though. Yeah, it does. I forgot about book club. I don’t even know what book I was supposed to have read, so hopefully some other part of my brain took care of that and already read it. Yes, that’s where we’re at right now. It’s not great and it’s not particularly enjoyable, but at least I’ll be doing art stuff at the end of the day to make up for all that crazy nutso fuckedupedness.

Say Yay?

I’d say yay Friday but I have such a huge pile of things that has to be graded this weekend that I’m not really looking forward to it. I’m not even sure how I’m going to pull it off honestly. It seems impossible. But grades are due in a short time and I have to give these kids a chance to fix their mistakes, although I was significantly frustrated with the last batch of redoes. I don’t know how many times I can explain evidence vs inference. ALL the times, actually. With some people, it just straight up doesn’t seem to matter. So I’m a little frustrated, because I have kids who want Principal’s Honor Roll so they need all As but they don’t always do A work. Or be quiet, which is the citizenship part of it. Sigh.

This school year is a lot. I’m thinking they’re all a lot right now. That might be saying something right there.

Artwise, I’m struggling to keep the hour a night…still. Usually by October, I’ve got this, but October is almost over. So I’m tracing every night, but I think last night was the first time I managed an actual hour. And it’s because I stayed up late. And made myself stop working at 9:30 PM even though I wasn’t done with that class. My brain keeps screaming about balance.

So tracing…Wednesday night…

Which looks a lot like Thursday night (except I obviously made it out of the 600s and into the 700s).

The bathtubs are done; the figures are done. That snake is next and then all the bits around the bathtubs, minus the two rugs that are already done. I think there’s about 250 pieces left. So I could finish it this weekend…but also, there’s grading. Frustrating. Really really frustrating.

I’m there, y’all. Also here…

‘Tis witchy season.

From Interpretations…Betty Busby’s Subterranean…

So much handwork.

How does she get it all done? I love this type of stitching and want to do more of it.

Also Claire Passmore’s Anchored is fascinating…

The construction…the thought process behind it…

So cool.

We had to trim the eucalyptus trees. It makes me sad. The birds! The shade…

Poor things. The neighbor’s roof now visible. Bleck.

Owl pellets so far from the entryway.

I’m going to put them in a ziplock baggie for my neighbor’s kid when he comes trick-or-treating (he wants them…I’m not being a mean neighbor).

And here’s where I’m at.

My inner raccoon, more like it. But possums are also cool.

OK. I really am just surviving day by day and looking for the moments that sustain me. Yesterday was a bit much at school. I could do without it. The teaching was fine. The other stuff. Ugh. Make it stahhhp. So today is supposed to be an independent assignment so I can grade shit. We’ll see how that goes. Based on previous experiences? Yeah. Not so much. We keep trying though. Then after school, I finally got my wash for the ceramics pieces. I remembered gloves and brushes…there were no gloves last time. I’m going to do the washes and consider glazing. Then home for dinner and grading and tracing. I can stay up a little late tonight, but had to shuffle pilates, dentist, and groceries to tomorrow because Sunday is a meeting up in the OC. All day for that. Plus trying to grade. I’m not driving this time, so that should help. But one assignment has to be done on computer AND paper. So is my phone a hotspot for that? Or do I just take all the paper stuff. SIGH fucking SIGH. I did get an email from a coteacher last night who saw my banned book piece at the library. That was cool. I don’t know her very well, so it was a nice connection.

Anyway, send good thoughts into the air for your teacher friends. It’s a week from Halloween and the staff drama is just as good as the kid drama. Plus I can’t find last year’s costume and I don’t have the time or money for a new one…so there’s that.

Buggin’…

So hi. Coupla things that are bugging me this morning. 1. Tearing down part of a historic landmark (historic or historical? I argue both) without permission. That is truly shitting upon the American people. 2. The people who don’t understand the idea of No Kings. Um. Really? See previous remark. Or any of the other laws broken so far. The president has a specific job and rules and if you don’t follow them, you are not a rebel, a rogue; you are breaking the laws you swore to uphold. Like a king. 3. Not swearing in a representative that was voted in by her constituents, even though you swore in others (who supported your agenda). Not trying to control things at all, are we? Reeks of some crazy shit to me. (Release the Epstein Files; I’m OK if Democrats are included. I want EVERYONE revealed.) 4. Not to mention dragging away people who are going through the legal immigration process, following all the rules, contributing to the community, paying taxes, and have committed no crimes, or minor crimes so LONG ago, that if we held some of our white males accountable in the same way, I think the entire government might no longer exist. Which does seem to be what they are aiming for. 5. My school board’s idiotic decision to vote against the sex ed curriculum, which might now affect every 8th-grade science teacher and their students in the district in a very negative way. Because they wanted to push forth their political agenda…not do what’s best for the staff and students. It’s so frustrating at the moment. There was more. There’s always more.

Deep breaths. Moving on. Am I moving on? Well no, because my art is political at the moment and that makes it frustrating to make, even though I would be more frustrated NOT to be making it, not to be voicing my opinions, not to be putting it out there. I’m tracing. I’m close to an hour a night, but can’t quite get there (cough cough day job cough). Here’s Monday night…

I actually forgot to take a picture, because honestly, this part is fairly boring to look at. It’s very relaxing to DO, to stand there and just trace around things that are already drawn. The most stressful part is when I’m doing the water because the pieces are weird-ass, complicated shapes and I have to remember what overlaps what. So it’s a pain to not be able to get it all done in one go. But that just isn’t happening right now.

Here’s last night…

I almost made it to the 600s. I stopped with that leg in the middle because it was a good place to stop and it was already past my bedtime, because I did pilates last night because I have to deliver a quilt to a show this afternoon, and then I packed up that quilt and did some email stuff and some organization stuff for school and graded all the tests and wrote them down and decided against inputting them and then decided how I’m dealing with the kids who were absent yesterday and then I traced. So I got 50 minutes. That said, that’s better than nothing. I’ve been tracing for over 8 hours so far and I have another 400 pieces to go. I’m gonna push for a whole hour tonight, but then it gets complicated, right? I need to grade stuff too. I forgot the pile of papers I’m supposed to be working on; I left it at school. Aargh. Considered going back to get them but decided that was crazy (it was 7 PM by then).

A lot of what I do seems crazy sometimes.

The owl left us another pellet.

It was much larger but kind of falling apart. I feel like the established owls leave more solid owl pellets? I’m not sure how that works. But I’m up to 6? Maybe 7 I’ve collected (teachers everywhere just screamed…and if you don’t get it, be thankful).

More art from Interpretations! This is so appropriate: this is Helen Geglio’s Mind Map: Overthinking.

Her stuff is fascinating.

I’m jealous of her being able to sit down and stitch. I have such a hard time with that right now. Also, I’ve been mispronouncing her name in my head all these years, so I will now correct that.

And this…by Lena Meszaros, True Haven.

This piece will be hanging with mine in Virginia starting in January, which is cool. I think it will go well with mine.

More on Friday! I have to get to work. We’re wearing red so the school district can see that we’re pissed about the lame offer they gave us for the next contract. Reminds me of the other thing that was bugging me: How expensive all the things are now: food, electricity, goods. All my expenses are going up and my salary will be going backwards if the district has any say in it. A $28 million surplus is apparently not enough. I know what I’d do with that surplus, and it’s not ‘send it to Argentina’. I have to take photos of all the people in red PLUS copy tests for the absent kids so they can’t cheat with AI. Then teaching vocab and Newton’s First Law today (ah, inertia, if only I knew you). Then drop off a quilt, come back, and grade like the wind. Or not like the wind, because it would just throw things around like a middle schooler having a tantrum. Then tracing some more water. Like a king. No. Like an artist who has no desire to be king.

Another Dimension

It was a busy weekend, even though I canceled/missed three things. The next two weekends seem to be just as bad…lots of meetings, driving, going to things, getting things done. I feel proud of the 20 minutes of yardwork I managed yesterday. I can’t keep up, for real.

So let’s do the tracing stuff first. Still doing it. Thought putting that yellow post-it on the drawing marking where I’d last been, writing the next number to trace on there, that’s smarter than I have been in the past.

Mostly I would just document the number and approximate location of the next piece in my phone and then spend 2-5 minutes the next day trying to find that on the drawing, which might be a reflection on my late-night ability to describe positions of things.

You would think like “left bathtub” would be enough, but is that left when it’s right sides up or upside down, how I trace it? I just never know. So the post-it seemed awesome…until I lost it last night as I flipped the drawing.

Super problematic since I hadn’t documented the last number I traced in my phone, so I had to stare at it for 5 minutes, trying to figure that out. I still couldn’t find the post-it. It flipped somewhere into another dimension. Fact is, I managed to get to piece 500 last night, so I’m almost halfway through. I’ve been finding it hard to even get an hour a night, which might still be a problem this week. I have a ton of grading to do…still…always…and this week does not bode well for big chunks of grading time unfortunately. So much of what I need to grade is deep-thought grading. I actually have to be mentally present to get it done. And it’s time-consuming. Of course. Anyway. Day job.

I had a moment Friday night about the No Kings protest…and made a last-minute decision to march…canceled myself out of two other things and made a plan to make it to the last thing that involved parking two miles away from the march, walking in, doing the march, and walking out. So it was over 6 miles in the long run.

Pro: I felt good about the march; it’s a plus to see so many like-minded people with a goal, when the news is so hell bent on the shit show (literally, if you pay attention to our president wannabe king). Also, I got plenty of exercise. It was all uphill on the way back though. I did go by myself, but you’re never really by yourself in a crowd of 80,000 people.

Yeah, I love my country and I don’t want it ruined by racists and people who say they’re Christian but don’t behave very Christian. And they are ruining it right now. In so many ways.

The Man and I went to a new place for dinner. It was fancy. You know how you know? I took a picture of my plate…

Yeah, if I did that every week, you’d see a lot of standard burger plates. But this was pretty.

Speaking of pretty and cool and fascinating, I went to the Visions Interpretations artist talks after the march. I was hoping to see a friend, but thanks to the military and Vance and probably the Republican party, they closed the freeway so they could shoot things over it, and many people had to leave early to miss that. Thanks to the government. They dropped shrapnel on a CHP vehicle. I find that amusing only because no one was inside and no one was injured. Maybe don’t do that again dumbasses. I’m sure that expenditure was warranted. Like the ballroom. And the parade.

I did meet an artist, Eden Quispe, whom I’d only known online. Our work has been in shows together but I’d never seen it (or her) in person. So that was cool. Here’s her piece, Grandma Pearl, made from linens from her grandmother.

She has a truly fascinating process.

I want to be more freeform in my work, but I never really get there. Maybe when I retire.

I took about 3000 pictures of Diane Nunez’s piece Multifaceted…

I took a lot of pictures because it was fascinating.

Also because I couldn’t take pictures of some of the stuff I wanted to because people were standing in front of them.

That is one of the issues with artist talks…too many people.

Although I do enjoy hearing the artists talk about their work.

Unfortunately, I’m running out of time this morning; I’ll have to post the other photos I took later this week. I’ll leave you with this sweet baby…

Ah Nova.

And this almost daily donation of an owl pellet on my front steps…

And this life truth.

Although the new system does not work the same…I actually have to think ahead about what I might want to read next, and that is truly annoying. I cannot make more decisions than I already am.

OK. School. Reviewing net forces and then sending them off to do the things without my help. Ha! Like that’s gonna work. And then dinner out with a book club group that I rarely see in person anymore. Then grading (well, grading before and after) and tracing. Then hopefully more sleep than last night (ha! more funnies) and do it again, slightly differently.

Today the Oatmeal Exploded.

Monday was burning oatmeal. Today was exploding oatmeal, all over the side of the bowl, where it will stick like concrete. Fun times. And yesterday kinda felt like that. Or maybe Monday. Or both. The workload is a challenge. Too many parts to it. I’m pretty sure I was supposed to have some literacy thing done by the 27th but they haven’t provided a calendar for it, so it’s just not gonna happen. Or they’ll tell us on the 20th that it has to be done by the 27th (‘it’ being something where you schedule admin to come watch you do it), and that’ll be the end of me.

Teaching-wise, the content is fine, the kids are OK (except for the dingbat who couldn’t shut up yesterday about all the reasons she didn’t want to sit where she was put). I just can’t get far enough ahead to not feel like I can’t breathe. Might be a me problem.

Monday, I made it to ceramics, where both pieces were out of the bisque fire. I tentatively put them together (it’s a little wobbly, hence my hand)…

I go back and forth about what to do next. I know these colors won’t survive a glaze fire, so the plan is to iron oxide, darken it all up in the crevices, and then use a satin matte glaze on some areas for color. Or all areas. I don’t know.

The only crack in the upper torso is where that finger attaches to the breast. And the crack in the bottom piece got smaller in the second bisque firing.

I fixed this, which will hopefully go on top of the head. Scary to get to the point where I have to put it all together.

Not sure where to store all the parts at the moment. I don’t have enough shelf space for any of it at the moment. I could move the head out, but there probably still wouldn’t be enough room for more than the base. I’m hoping to go Thursday to underglaze the tree and maybe put the head in the bisque fire.

Meanwhile, at home, I finished drawing the big piece…added that target and a few other things.

Numbered it Monday and Tuesday night…it’s a little over a thousand pieces. Not bad for trying to keep it simple (ha!).

And then last night, I started tracing…

I didn’t get far. But that’s OK. I’ve got fewer meetings at night this week. Should help. Although I’m trying to catch up on grading still. Always.

We got a chunk of rain yesterday…my app had been saying 0.04″ so I wasn’t really prepared for being sopping wet after school…just walking to the car.

And at home, checking all the new gutters (one had an issue) and digging a trench…in the rain. Fun times. Then pajamas on and finally finishing the book I had left in the morning, under duress.

So many uses for this.

I stayed late at school yesterday to document all the behaviors from the beginning of the month on our digital system and to call two parents, one of which didn’t answer and his voicemail was full, so I texted, used our parent communication app, and sent it to the translator, so there’s no question of their understanding the issue. The other one tried to say “you know he’s ADHD” as an excuse. Ah ma’am…I raised one of those, and you better stop enabling that shit right now. I always counter with, oh yeah, I raised one of those.

I love Gemma Correll’s drawings…

And they feel very real at the moment.

Especially that…I’m thinking of some specific buildings. Empty of humans of course.

I feel like I post this every year. And it’s true every year.

OK, trees are being trimmed today (stress!) plus I think I have to come up with something for the kids to do for the last half of the period, because I’m ahead of my co-teacher. Or not. Just have them finish their cover pages. There we go. Simple. Then pilates and grading and tracing. And reading. All good.