This Could Be the End of Everything*

Ugh. Get act together. Mornings are hard. Yeah, I know it’s not early. I haven’t been sitting around doing nothing. Straight up, I’m not entirely sure WHAT I’ve been doing, so don’t ask me. There were maps and trails and boychild took over the mousing, and the girlchild called briefly, and there were dogs and cats and all that. Sometimes I think time just does a slippy thing and wanders away from me. Like when I’m quilting and I look up at the clock and go Holy Fuck. Gotta go to bed. But then I lie there and can’t sleep. Welcome to my world. Maybe I should have just quilted all night.

No, you know how with daylight savings time, they always tell you to adjust slowly over the next week, getting up a little earlier every morning so the day of isn’t a shock to your system? Yeah, well, I always try to do that with school too. I don’t like mornings and I stay up way too late normally, and during summer break, I stay up even later, but Friday I have to be at school before 8 AM, which is earlier than we actually start, but they key everything into the elementary schools, which start earlier than the middle schools. And there’s gonna be massive parking issues, because our lot is closed and there isn’t enough parking, so I don’t even wanna deal with that…to the tune of my considering riding a bike or walking to school (OK, it would take close to an hour to do that). Blaargh.

Anyway. Mornings. Nonfunctional. Not efficient at all. Art brain is completely offline. Seriously, do you ever hear me talking about drawing in the morning or making anything useful but a cup of tea in the AM? Fuck no. All you perky morning people, please just stay away from me. Until cup of tea number 2.

I did a bunch of stuff yesterday. Some of it was final shit on the garage. I’m calling it done, even though there’s a file cabinet and some storage stuff that needs to be managed. Boychild and I made another trip to the parental dumpster (no, they really have a dumpster…I don’t just drop shit at their house), plus I sold another thing on Craigslist and then did some stuff, including school shopping and dog food and the library, because ALL the books you’ve had on hold for 17 months WILL SHOW UP THE WEEK BEFORE SCHOOL STARTS. It happens every year. I might have to give up on one of them. I’m desperately trying to read the book for tomorrow night’s book club. I don’t think there’s an Audible version of The Left Hand of Darkness. Oh god. There probably is. I don’t Audible though. I stop paying attention when someone is reading to me.

So dinner was late. Dinner is often late in these circumstances. There also were a lot of animals lying around pretending to be very hot and tired.

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That eyeball…

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I did quilt in the afternoon for a bit. Not much.

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I started legs and stuff…

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Garage before we started. That’s solid crap in the center section, taller than me. It’s been like that for years. The boychild has been complaining about it for years as well. It was just so incredibly overwhelming. I couldn’t even deal. So with his help, we did it.

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Now I should have taken one after this one…because the pile of storage stuff in the middle is piled up elsewhere, and the school stuff on the right and behind is all in my car, to be delivered to school this morning. So the whole center is pretty much empty. For now. There’s another shelf thing being delivered on Thursday from one of my parents’ rentals. There are a few empty shelves in there, but maybe not enough.

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I haven’t fully solved the art storage issue, but it’s all up off the ground and out of my closets. I was a screenprinter before I became a quilt artist. Much harder to store that stuff. And there’s so much of it…

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And that big table is available for screenprinting if I decide to go back to that. I might. I liked it.

No. I’m not putting a car in there. That’s just silly.

More little stitches, mostly French knots, in the feather stitching up top.

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Then back to the machine…cat giving me the Other Eye this time.

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And more quilting…

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It’s very meditative…even all the little windows…

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I got to the top of the rocky crotch. It was close to midnight thirty then, so I quit.

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I was wide awake, but see note above about trying to shift sleep cycle for school. Ha! So I did all the legs…I’m definitely past the midpoint on outlining…

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That was all after dinner. Of course, there’s all the background stuff, which will take some time. So I’m hoping to do another 3 or 4 hours today, but that means I need to get out of here and do the stuff that needs doing…delivery to school, plus thrift shop again and smog the car. Hopefully. I don’t FEEL like doing any of that. I don’t even want to go NEAR school, but I have to get this shit out of my car somehow. And please don’t ask me about the bedroom…I’m definitely stalled on that. The deadline for that is a little ways out (OK, really only about 2 weeks), so it’s easier to ignore it, I guess. I knew with the garage that once school started I might not go in there for a while, and I didn’t want the art down on the ground if rain started.

OK. Get it done. That’s my plan for the day.

*Keane, Somewhere Only We Know

To Sew This Hole Up That You Ripped in My Head*

Decision overload. I have a broken drawer of fabric. It’s been broken for three months. I can’t replace it exactly…those drawers are a good 20 years old. So either I replace one stack of them, which means everything on top will no longer fit, because the two stacks will be different heights, or I replace two stacks, which means less room than I have now, because the new ones are slightly smaller (but on sale right now). Or I have this new vision, might be a crazy one, of a shelf unit in that space that goes to the ceiling and holds smaller containers. Or even just shelves…the ones that slot in, a la Home Depot…because I could put more in and have more storage than I have now. But that sounds like a major time and work commitment, and now is not the time for that. Seriously. Four days before I go back to school? But I don’t have to DO it now. I just have to commit to a plan.

You know, sometimes people ask why I write this blog, and it really isn’t for you (sorry). It’s a brain dump, a motivational device for getting stuff done, a way to make decisions. It’s like once the words are out of my head I don’t have to worry so much about what was said. I think the shelf system is the way to go. It’s harder and more time-consuming, but it’s also the best solution to the problem. I think. Aargh. For now.

So it won’t get done any time in the next month probably, because I’m upending everything here still. But there’s a semi-plan in place. I just did that in my head. Well…in the part of my head that I just spilled out into the interwebz.

I kept stitching down on Saturday…

Sometimes I get antsy and I have to get up and walk around, sometimes dance a little in the hallway, yell out a bit, make another cup of tea or heat up the one I haven’t been drinking. I think my teacup is just an excuse to get up and move around…which is a good thing.

I totally tense up while I’m doing this…

Anyway, I had a plan to go see some art afterwards, so I HAD to finish (I really do much better with deadlines)…

And I did. About 4 1/2 hours to stitch her down. Why less than I thought? Because lots of pieces means lots of time in the early stages, but not so much time now, because this is about distance more than quantity, and the distance is small.

I love seeing them from the back…

I actually look at the back to see if I missed any pieces. I found one and fixed it. There might be more. Hard to say.

Kitten slept the entire fucking time.

Then Sunday, the boychild and I went at the garage again. He was cutting things up for the dumpster/trash…and I was going through the last of the school stuff and moving all the art up and off the ground.

I forgot to take a picture of that…really I should do a before/after thing, but we’re still piling stuff that needs to get out of here.

Nighttime found me on the entryway floor, laying her out, ready for pinbasting.

I had a piece of fabric for the backing that was almost exactly the right size. I also had some batting that was the right size, but then I realized it hadn’t been washed. I use Warm and Natural, and it will shrink when washed. I have had to wash these before, so I always prewash batting. I got the leftover pieces from the community quilts, and that’s what wasn’t washed. So I pulled it all out of my stash and will put it in the bathtub today so it can go back in the stash and be ready to go.

I managed to find an older piece of washed batting that was the right size. And I pinbasted her…

I did all of the ironing and pinning while I was listening to the annual trainings that teachers have to do: Blood-borne Pathogens, Pesticide Idiocy, and the Mandated Reporter stuff. I love how they blamed teachers for abuse at school. OK. It’s OK. I passed. There’s one more we have to do, but they haven’t MADE IT YET. Because I can blow off stuff until the last minute. OK. I actually can blow off SOME stuff until the last minute, but not without repercussions. Like not sleeping due to my brain worrying about shit over and over again. But don’t make me deal with video trainings once the new year starts. I hate that.

I was behind on this. I did three strands of feather stitching on the top, and then for the fourth night, I did lazy daisies in one of the feather strands. I just wanted some different lines up there.

That’s 217 days of stitching. Yeah, I looked it up. So there are 148 days left (yes, I used a calculator).

Yes, I’m quilting today. Hopefully for a good chunk of time, although the shit is beginning to pile up…I want her quilted and the binding at least started or on before Friday. Seriously. I was really good yesterday and got almost all of the school stuff sent to the print shop, but I still have one more thing, plus stuff I need to do in the classroom, and the bedroom…holy god, the bedroom is still a freakish disaster. There’s So Much I got done and So Much I didn’t get done this summer. Nothing new there. The garage is a relief (I swear I’ll do a before/after photo thing). The bedroom will be a relief when it’s done.

But I need to start thinking about the next quilt. The drawing is barely started. I have all the ideas and concepts in my head, percolating, but an image hasn’t fully popped through. Hopefully it will some time this week.

OK. Need to get work. Enough thinking here. Need to do.

*Banks, Beggin for Thread

There’s a Secret Magic Past World*

My brain appears to be blank this morning. Or at least the part that’s available for writing is blank. There’s another huge part that’s trying to make a Saturday to-do list. I already know the boychild and I will be making a dumpster run, but he’s hiking right now. I didn’t have the energy to get up early to do that. I’m very protective of the right to sleep in…because I spent years getting up early for soccer games and driving to the middle of nowhere to sit on a wet field and wait for games to start. Plus sleep is this thing I’m always chasing…trying to do it right. Such a joke! Because one night of doing it right is never enough. So people tell me to go to bed earlier. OK. So then I can lie there for even longer, trying to fall asleep. This is not a new thing for me. My whole life has been about bad sleep.

So I had a number of hours in sleep mode last night, but I also had all 4 animals in the room. They were fussy after the boychild left to hike. And the neighbor’s workers showed up. Then Kitten had to boisterously clean all her parts and Calli started to whine about going out. Then Simba started with the snorts he does when he wants to get out of the crate. Sigh. Midnight was the only quiet one. So I’m sitting here, a little drugged on not-sleep, and Kitten is next to the computer, sound asleep. I guess I make her sleep through typing and The Cure, but it does not seem fair. Cat naps. Smart beasts.

So back to today. The last Saturday before school starts. (NOOOOOOOOO!!!!) Got some art stuff tonight. Just heard about another one of the art buildings we’ve visited multiple times…they’re kicking the artists out (Glashaus in Barrio Logan, for those who are local and maybe have gone there). Ripples from the horrendous Ghost Ship fire in Oakland. Artists kicked out before fixing problems? Hard to say what’s happening there, but I know it’s frustrating for the artists in 21 art studios there. The downtown studio I used to have is now all living spaces. They could make more money that way. I couldn’t afford a studio any more…gave mine up when I was pregnant with the boychild. But I loved those spaces, free from the house to-do list. No distractions. Just a pure workspace. I’m lucky to have space in my home and to make art that is safe to do in a house (although we set up the garage space so I can screenprint again if I choose to do so). People working in glass and metal or needing space for kilns or whatever, living in rentals…they absolutely need reasonably priced space to work and store materials. This town doesn’t support that…never has. Art is so important to our existence…I wish the money people would see that and make space for it.

I had a conversation with an artist friend the other day about how we create alone so much of the time. She’s older than I am and the going out and interacting with others gets harder, for sure. I’ve gone through times when I really don’t interact with other artists at all. I’m socially not the best in the world (hello introvert), so that doesn’t help. I can see as mobility and energy lessen that it would be more important to save what you had for making art. Hard to explain that to non artists. But these studio buildings help with that. Plus the exhibition space. I’m going to miss the openings there.

Yesterday, I did manage some stitch down at my last summer daytime quilt meeting…Susan is knitting something that is apparently very brain damaging…

I got more than halfway done, which is good, although I’m still behind. And I’m not sure how much I’m gonna get done today. Gotta go move some trash.

I worked on this at gaming last night, mostly on the top…but I’m a little concerned about the vast difference in sizes. Hmmm.

I’m pretty sure they should be the same size. Yikes.

Here’s the back of the stitchdown. I got above the midpoint…

So that was about 2 1/2 hours. Bodes well for a quick finish, but first I need to load a bunch of crap in my car and try to dump it in my parents’ dumpster (I have permission…just trying to beat the neighbor). And pick up my Earth Stories quilt, which is home after a long trip around the United States without any protests, despite the fuss when I originally suggested a quilt that was about birth control and Planned Parenthood. Which is good…I have a show to enter where that would work.

OK, no matter what, I need to just get my act together. It helps that I’ve had a cup of tea while writing this. My brain responds to caffeine well. Luckily.

*Rocky Votolato, White Daisy Passing

Infiltrating My Brain

Awww school. You’ve infiltrated my brain dammit and now I’m in panic mode. I keep looking at the calendar and reminding myself that there are hours in there and I will get organized at some point. My brain is unraveling. I haven’t bought supplies, I don’t have my stuff into the print shop, my room is a disaster.

Walk away.

So I had my stitching meeting last night and started the next month’s blocks. This is May though and not April. April is not sewn down yet. I did stems and legs and grass. The legs are awesome…two couched threads with bullion knots over them.

I have lots more to do on these. Obviously. And I should start sewing April down too.

When I got home, I finally started ironing more quilt parts together. I iron the eyes separately and then put them on the face.

There they are. The eyes are the most important part of the quilt, I think.

Aliens in my quilt, polluting my world.

Seriously. Alien ships give off CO₂, right?

Ironed the head/land to the rest. Most of it’s rolled up.

But then I realized that I hadn’t washed the background fabric in Retayne, and the dark fabrics, especially the batiks, bleed like a motherfucker. And then they say not to use the high-efficiency washers to do that, so I stirred for 20 minutes.

Which was good, because it didn’t bleed at all. Midnight did not fucking care.

Then I finally got her ironed down. She’s taller than I am. Not that that’s hard.

Head ironed. Woo hoo.

Now I need to stitch the whole thing down. Like today. Ha! Well. It will probably take 5-11 hours, based on the last two quilts. Probably closer to 5 hours. But I need to do school stuff too and deal with the bedroom and the garage, all of which are stressing me out.

I’m glad I’m at this point though. She’s good. I’m good with her good. But now I need to go do shit so I can stop panicking.

For a Minute There I Lost Myself*

School today. Not the start, just the prep. The stuff we do every year that no one pays us to do but that has to be done. Sometimes I only do this stuff alone, at home, staring at a computer, but we’re trying to finesse what we built from scratch last year, and that takes both of us. Next year maybe we won’t have to meet beforehand. You miss the people…not the workload. Well. And not ALL the people. Just like any other job.

I wanted to be done with the ironing yesterday…COULD have been done, but ’twas not to be. I started well…doing all those stupid little windows in the morning…see how small they are? How many of them there are?

Can you find the two cats? It’s hot and humid here. Cats don’t like hot and humid generally. At least that’s the impression I’m getting.

Then I had a good visit with an artist friend but when I got back, it was apparent to me that thunder had happened. Calli doesn’t like thunder any more. At all.

She tried to dig out the hat tree in the corner of the entryway, she tried to go under my desk, and in doing so, knocked down the ironing board with the quilt and 17 thousand safety pins on it. She also tried to dig through the couch, in my bathroom, and on my bed. Poor baby. There’s more possible thunderstorms today. I’m debating bringing her with me to school, just in case. Not that she’ll be better there, but at least she won’t be alone. And destroy the house. I debate the thundershirt idea every year, but haven’t done it yet.

So she was semi-frantic when I got home and needed about 4 hours of petting and sleeping to get over it. Meanwhile, the internet disappeared, and then so did my time, because fixing that took about 4 1/2 hours and a trip to the not-so-local cable services store for a new modem. And four different guys. The last one was named Lloyd and he promised to fix it in three minutes and he did. That’s all I really need folks. Follow-through and accountability. Or something. Thanks Lloyd.

I did this while I was waiting…

The white lazy daisies up on the top right plus the fern stitch. I also sewed 4 eyeballs down, but that’s not documented photographically. Just imagine the elephants from a couple days ago, but with no pins through their eyes.

Oh yeah, and I stopped by to see my exhibit, because it was near where I was visiting…just sat there and stared at it for about 5 minutes or so. It’s funny, because I walk in and start to explain who I am and they’re like, “We know who you are.” Oh. OK. Hi.

It’s still weird to sit in there and see all my stuff.

Before I left the house, though, I had finished those windows…

And ironed the arm from the night before on top of it all…

Then after the internet fiasco, so many hours wasted on the phone and otherwise, because then the phone was not working once we replaced the modem…I went back to ironing and finished up the torso…which looks ever so strange without boobs, quite honestly.

And then did the last bit of land…and a rocketship, and the wind behind her head. It’s a cheery landscape? No?

Eventually I will iron these two together, once I finish the head.

That’s today’s goal…along with stitching it all down. Hopefully. I have my quilt meeting tomorrow afternoon, and I might have nothing on this to take with me if I don’t catch up. There aren’t many pieces left, but it was enough at 12:30 last night that I was too tired to keep going, plus I knew I’d have to be up early for school today. Ugh. That phrase. Damn day job. I need another month. Seriously. Finish the quilt, the cleanup, the organization. Need more time. Always.

*Radiohead, Karma Police

It’s More Likely to Happen if I Talk about It

This happens every year. I get close to the beginning of the new school year and I decide to just make art nonstop. Like screw the housecleaning and the to-do list. Probably I should be more mature and get the car smogged and the bedroom out of chaos mode (I have two drawers and the hope chest still…just cannot deal. Cannot.). But no. I need this quilt done. I’m irritated that I’ve finished no quilts in months. This one isn’t even that big…although it does have a ton of pieces.

The last week before going back…it just sucks. You realize how many hours you’re going to lose…not just the hours at school, but it’s back to daily grading and planning, to kid problems that never leave your working brain, to adult drama (seriously), to stupid professional development that aims to teach you what you already know (some day they might differentiate…but it hasn’t happened yet), to endless meetings. UGH. I need to change my mindset. Somehow. Maybe if this summer had been more of a recharge and less like hard work. Reminder for next summer, eh? Then again, LAST summer at about this point, I was getting kicked out of an AQS show for an invisible penis. So. There’s that.

Anyway, I had another dental appointment in the morning, but then came back and refused to do anything but art. That’s not true. I moved a few things into the garage. But the humidity is killing me at the moment. Ugh. So I started ironing. Which isn’t hot at all. Stop laughing.

I did the rest of the hills…hard to see it all in this picture. We got oil things and a dam and a cracked highway and a volcano. Like you do. Some power plants.

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I added some oil drums to the top right…

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Then ironed all the bottom stuff to that…

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It’s super long, so that’s harder than it looks to keep it all attached. Right now it’s all rolled up under where I’m ironing. Somewhat dangerous, as I might accidentally iron it all to itself. That would suck.

I did some of this after dinner. I think I was doing blue in the top, above the tree. Just filling in spaces with whatever makes sense.

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Then back to ironing. I did about 5 hours total yesterday…up to almost 14 hours of ironing at this point, but I’m much closer to done now. These flowers were a bit of a challenge.

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Then the body behind it, attaching it all to the bottom bits and building one arm. The hand went in front of and behind the flowers.

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I did some of the torso (the yellow sun thing) and then turned the teflon sideways to do the other arm separately. I numbered it before the torso, but the torso has to be finished before, because it’s behind the arm. Complicated much?

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Awwww. Tiny bird.

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Then I ironed the other arm where it belongs, although it’s not ironed down where the buildings need to go. I just wanted you to see everything I ironed yesterday. It was a lot of little pieces. I gave up when the buildings were next.

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It was after midnight, I was tired, and I didn’t want to deal with all the tiny windows. Although, now it’s morning and I still don’t want to deal with them. Huh.

So then I was trying to figure out how to photograph this thing. Finished, it’s 61″ long…I’m not finished yet.

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This is a slightly better view. You can see I need to finish the torso, the land above it, and her head.

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So I’m in the 1000s. About 320 pieces to go. That’s it. Then iron it to the background and start ironing it down. See now I can see an endpoint, a light at the end of the tunnel. So it’s really hard to NOT work on it right this second. I have about an hour and a half before I have to leave again. But I need to get the dogs. And really I should clean something (ugh I so don’t want to). I could be done with ironing today if I worked hard and if my schedule allowed. Hard to say if that will happen. Stitch down by tomorrow? Quilting by Friday? I don’t know if I can pull that off. Probably not. But I can talk about it. It’s more likely to happen if I talk about it.

Back from That Soul Vacation*

It’s frustrating to keep making plans to get a certain amount of art done, and then you end up barely getting anything done, whether it’s because of limited time or because things take longer than you thought they would (my fault for so many tiny pieces) or even both! Which is what I’m dealing with today…along with a cracked filling that needs replacing because I grind my teeth. The same with exercise and cleaning and organizing and getting everything done. Life is time-consuming.

Anyway, I’m back to the dentist today to deal with the filling, unfortunately…but it’s gotta be done. I don’t know what to tell her about grinding my teeth…I was busted for that the first time my freshman year of college. I need to socket the exercise back in regularly. I am definitely a work in progress. Sigh.

I did some of this while I was finishing something else up…more stitching in the bottom left, the lighter color, pistil stitches and fly stitches.

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And I have almost all of these sewn down…just eyeballs and those big yellow flower things. I need this done by Friday. Maybe Thursday. And I was watching the last bit of an episode I can’t watch on the computer…

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So ironing started late. Same time as when I’m teaching, ironically. What else did I get done yesterday? Some major cleaning in the bedroom again (still not anywhere near done), boychild needed shoes, some other stuff. Then I ironed the rocky crotchland.

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So yeah, this sits right above the legs…and then the land sits above it. Normal people might just do one piece of brown behind all the rocks and water. I am not normal. But I like how it looks, so that’s my problem. I didn’t get much more in height yesterday…

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I did start on the land, but you can see there are a ton of tiny pieces here…

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The sheep will look more sheeplike with outlining. Hopefully. So this afternoon, when I’m recovering from the dental crap, hopefully I’ll be ironing. Before that, I’ll be dumping 10 bags of clothing and other crap at the thrift store. It’s progress. I know when I’m done with this, it will be a good thing. It’s just sucking up so much time. This is nothing new, right? I’m so at peace when I’m ironing though. Makes me want to do more. Less likely to grind my teeth, right?

Anyway. Teeth call. Louder than the other things.

*Train, Drops of Jupiter

Ironing in My Spare Time…

Interesting weekend. Surely was. I think I have 14 minutes to write this post. Already been to the dentist…sigh. This is what happens to the end of summer. Errands and appointments and meetings.

Anyway, so Saturday morning/afternoon, I worked on the other leg…

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There’s a plane in there that will show up better with stitching and a dark background.

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The lowest land bit goes behind one leg and in front of another. You wanna know why? It was not planned. I had already drawn one leg all the way down and I liked it. The other one wasn’t done, so the land went in front of it.

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Why do I have land at all? Well this quilt is for a show where there’s no nudity allowed, so my land bits solve that problem. But I didn’t just want two, because I don’t like even numbers for shit like that. So land…in three parts.

This is how far I got Saturday before I had to leave for the afternoon’s shenanigans…

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Polar bears…very tiny polar bears.

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Snagged a Groupon for a 90-minute cruise on this boat, wine and snacks.

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It was nice…mostly cloudy actually, with people who were good at talking, although I have to say, I don’t know how people afford to travel as much as some people do. I can’t afford it. All their trips sounded awesome (except I don’t want to do cruises)…

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Wildlife of course…

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Then we headed over to Arts & Amps, at the Karl Strauss tasting room over near Pacific Beach. We’ve been here before…we enjoy the mix of music and art. Cohort Collective are a local art group that has a lot of muralists in it…but today they also had Spenser Little, wire artist…

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And I’m pretty sure this is Christopher Konecki, although I may be wrong.

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And this is the Schizophonics, who were very hyper and loud.

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Spenser attaching his wire bits to the sign…

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That’s when we left…needed food. But it was good.

Then Sunday dog sleeping. Some family health excitement in the middle of all that. Suffice it to say that all is well (for now) and hopefully will stay that way.

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I had 4 nights of catchup on this unfortunately. Mostly down in the bottom left.

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Then more ironing after dinner…other leg above the land.

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A recycling truck…

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A city and a tornado…

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Yes. Those are tiny windows. I only lost one of them. So it looks like I’m halfway done, but I’m not in terms of pieces…because hands and fingers and two more land bits. I’m somewhere in the 400s…got plenty more to do and not a ton of time in which to do it.

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Today is errands and more cleaning and hopefully ironing at the end of it. I wanted to be done with ironing by today, but that’s not a thing. Not today. I’m pretty sure it’s another 10 plus hours. Maybe today and tomorrow? It’s possible. Time is frittering away. Drives me nuts. Feel like I am only ironing in my spare time…and that’s what I do during school. It should be better right now. Oh well…there’s progress. That’s a plus.

A Balance of Sorts

I really did take a (timed) nap with the clothes on my bed yesterday. I was so tired. Set the timer for 20 minutes and did the perfect nap, drooling on the pillow, woke up and (here’s the important part) GOT UP when the alarm went off, and felt mostly awesome the rest of the day. I love it when the science works. Now if I could just figure out the falling-asleep-at-a-reasonable-hour stuff, followed by the staying-asleep-all-night stuff and the not-waking-up-too-early-in-the-morning-and-then-not-being-able-to-go-back-to-sleep stuff.

Yeah. Well. Been working on that shit all my life and I still suck at it. I have bad sleep genes.

So I did deal with the hangers last night. The crochet-covered wooden hangers in the bag were all made by this friend of the family, an ancient woman named Craigie. She died when I was pretty young, but I do remember her. Makes it harder to just get rid of the damn things, but I can’t keep all of them. Mom gave me permission to pick the ones I like and thrift shop the rest. I kept some of the plastic skirt hangers, with the squeezy part? You know what I’m talking about? Because you can hang quilts (small ones or blocks) from them. And then I came in my office and realized I have like 10 of them already. Sigh. OK. Don’t need those, do I?

I’m feeling squeezed by time. Again. As always. I know when school starts and I want this quilt to be almost done if not completely done by the time students show up. Looking at the calendar over the next two weeks makes that a little panicky, because I still need to deal with bedroom and garage. Plus put time in there today and tomorrow for relaxation and enjoyment of life, right? It’s all good. I’ll figure it out. But it worries me that the left eye has twitched all summer. I need to slot some exercise into the mess. Boychild has been working for grandpa for days and it’s been too humid and warm for a hike, but trying to fit something else in before he leaves would be good. Plus smog the car, buy him new shoes, read the two books the library just automatically checked out to me (only a thousand pages or so), and geez. I don’t even know what else. Panic. Cull my tshirts. I don’t need that many of them.

Anyway, I managed to iron in the afternoon (GASP!) AND the evening after gaming. A little crazy, that. I toned down the water on this one. The quilt is about climate change and how it affects the earth, and I didn’t think that beautiful turquoise water I love so much would be appropriate, so I went for the grays…

It’s very stylized in places, like with the fishies.

I added the ocean behind, with a couple whales and a shark lurking about.

Then I went to gaming and killed a bunch of goblins and an orc, but also shot splinters into my own people (ah, the chaos star), but they were OK with it (at least they said they were), because I killed the orc. All that’s a foreign language, eh? It’s a story…I like stories. But I stitch during the game, because it helps me focus and not fall asleep. Plus it’s relaxing as hell to do both.

So this is the 9th block I’ve finished in Sue Spargo’s Folk Tails. The embroidery is pretty fun to do. People always freak out that I work on other people’s stuff, but my own stuff isn’t very portable sometimes, and I don’t have to think hard about this. There’s something very relaxing about hand embroidery, especially on wool.

Here’s the 9 finished blocks so far…they aren’t in order. You can see one in the bottom where the left side is done and the right side isn’t. I sewed them together because there’s overlap.

I haven’t quite finished prepping the next month’s worth of blocks…I have one done (that one you see above) and another one almost done. So then I can start the embroidery on those. Probably not today, to be honest. I don’t get a lot of this done normally. But I do enjoy it.

After gaming, it was late, but I had almost finished this leg…so I determined that I could finish both legs below the knee and THEN go to sleep.

Well, see, that’s the crazy shit, because then art brain is awake and wants to keep going until she (or I) collapses. So I got the one leg ironed in place and then started on the next one.

The land goes in front of one leg and behind the other…and there’s other stuff to be ironed higher up on the right leg, so that’s where I quit. After midnight. Again.

I’m hoping to do a couple of hours today, maybe deal with the two drawers in the dresser, the other two drawers in the other thing, the hope chest (oh fuck no, I’m not doing that today…I’m afraid of what’s in there). I’m slowly selling things on Craigslist, I’m slowly shoving shit into the trashcans, I’m slowly moving stuff out of the house (that’s much more slowly…nowhere to put it but the driveway). As I clean out the house, my brain makes these complicated quilts. But I love that part of me. I look back at older work and the new stuff is so full of images and I love the process and the product. I haven’t bought any fabric all summer, but will need binding for this one probably. Maybe not. I’m trying to use everything I have for now. I know that won’t last. I’m too addicted to having as wide a palette as possible. But as I was picking fabrics out, I would search in the very back of the drawers for pieces that hadn’t seen the light of day, give them a chance in a new quilt, let them poke their little fabricky heads out and be seen.

The boychild and I talked briefly about what it would take to redo this room, my studio. I’d have to move everything out (I’ve done parts of it due to water heater issues), rip off all the wallpaper and paint it, then scrape the ceiling crap off, replace the trashed floor. Then maybe do something different with the sliding glass door, which is currently inaccessible. Maybe some built-ins for fabric. But realistically, it’s so low down on the list of rooms that need help. The bathrooms and the kitchen first. Thinking way far out, once college is done and paid for. And maybe there’s extra money. Maybe.

Yeah. Well let’s just get through today, eh? Ironing some stuff, hopefully selling a table, cleaning up a little, then a relaxing boat ride and maybe some art and music later. Food of some sort. Some human time. A balance of sorts.

A Spray of Stars Hit the Screen*

Been up all hours now. Stayed up too late finishing the cutting-out stages on the quilt. Then up bloody early cuz I couldn’t sleep, plus some crazy person drove from Long Beach to buy my serger in the early dawn. I don’t serge. I also don’t early dawn. You don’t even know what a serger is, if you’re one of my non-sewing readers. Do I have non-sewing readers? Probably a few. I can’t even thread a serger. It takes 5 YouTube videos to thread a serger. Certainly not happening with the brain power I’ve got at the moment.

The Don’t Shut Up show is down. I got to leave early to come home and spend two hours writing the blogpost for it. You can see that here, if you didn’t go to the show. Shows are a lot of work, even when you’re not in charge. I still need to suss out the videos I’ve got and post about the artist talk, but that’s not happening today. Straight up, I need a break from all the cleaning and doing shit. Which is silly, because it’s not like I’ve been doing it full time or anything, but it just gets very overwhelming to have to make that many decisions about what to do with stuff and/or how to store it or get rid of it. I found a cardboard box full of silverware yesterday. In my bedroom cupboard. I didn’t even remember its existence. They’re not solid silver, unfortunately, because then maybe I could pay somebody to clear all this out, but they’ll supplement my stash. My eye is twitching again. The internet is ever so helpful. Causes are stress, fatigue, and caffeine. Well yes. I do have those. Thank you, internet.

Anyway, I will deal with the hangers today, but I’m not planning on a lot else. Well, there’s the pile of clothes I just dumped on the bed. More to go through…aaargh.

So yeah, I stayed up way too late last night because I just needed to be done with the cutting out of tiny little pieces…

See…there’s someone who knows how to sleep properly.

I finished cutting stuff out sometime after midnight. I think it was about 13 hours total.

And then early this morning, while waiting for the serger woman to show up, I negotiated space on the light table with Kitten…

Apparently it’s her table, not mine.

I just worked around her. Like I always do.

I sort all those tiny pieces out again into bins…they’re easier to deal with 100 pieces at a time…

I was visited by a hummingbird.

So this took two hours…and most of the last hour was sorting through pieces like in the bottom box. Tiny pieces. Crazy pieces. Who the fuck thought this was a good idea?

These pieces are either missing the paper or missing the fabric. Not bad…and that piece 485 is either the gray or the red. I’ll figure it out when I iron it all down.

All sorted.

Fourteen boxes of pieces for today’s ironing pleasure. If I can wake up enough to do that. I have shitty role models around me, all of them asleep. Think I’m going to go take a nap with the clothes on my bed. They probably won’t bug me too much…then maybe I’ll be able to iron for a while.

*Siouxsie and the Banshees, Kiss Them for Me