I’ve Gone to Ground*

Oh brain, mush brain, brain with few thoughts, brain that is still making my left eye twitch like a motherfucker. Oh brain. Stahp It.

So the plus is that it’s apparently Saturday and I finished the copyediting project…sent it off to the author this afternoon, about two hours ago…and then paced crazily around the house, trying to focus on anything at all. Nope. Not happening.

It’s apparently July too. So that’s a thing. June was a freakin’ blur. Still have three community quilts to finish. Tomorrow. Today I am done with shit I have to do.

Yesterday, I copyedited…I went to a beach bonfire in between two sessions of staring at tiny letters with new glasses, which caused a weird 3D thing in the middle of the computer screen…it’s still doing it, but I figure I’ll get used to it. I quit copyediting at around 11:30 PM because my left eye was vibrating too fast for me to be able to read well. Sign of tired eyes? You think?

Then I did a bunch of purplish and pink lazy daisies in the bush on the bottom right, to fill in the empty spaces.

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Then I did nothing. Eventually I managed sleep. Got up this morning and went back to the computer for more. Meanwhile, boychild and the ex worked on cleaning up animals…Simba got a flea bath, Calli got combed. I think Simba’s getting fleas removed here…it’s been a bitchy year for fleas…

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Then the boychild washed both cats, brave man.

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The cats have an appointment next week to hopefully get a prescription flea med that will work better than what’s not working now.

I ordered new quilting gloves, Machingers, the other night, because I realized my old ones were getting really gross and dirty with the pastel and stuff that’s all over the community quilts.

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I usually replace them about once a year anyway…so it’s time.

Kitten recovered from her bath…

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That’s what old pieces of smallish batting are for, right? Covering papers so wet cats can lie where they like?

Then I eventually made it back to numbering this…

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Yeah, it’s more pieces than I expected, and yes, I added the damn spaceship. I’d like to think aliens aren’t adding more carbon dioxide to the atmosphere, but maybe they are. So this one is ready to trace, as soon as I get the community quilts done. Let’s not talk about what else I need to do next week. Let’s just have a little happy dance about finishing the copyediting. Now I can pay the mortgage in the summer. No paycheck after the one I picked up yesterday until the end of August…it’s always a rough time of year. I’d like to say that I want more copyediting work, but if I don’t get a few weeks off, I might go nuts. Been working way too hard. Need some time with art and books and drawing and regular exercise and spacing out. Please.

Oh yeah, and here’s a video of me talking about my Quilt National piece, Beyond the Concrete…it’s a little zoomy around in blurry space at times, but just look away if you get motion sickness and listen to my crazy voice…I especially love where it froze on my face for the preview here…I’m singing along to some song, ooooh ooooh, surely.

Ooooh ooooh oooooh.

*Zero 7, Destiny

I’m a Rebel Just for Kicks Now*

So as I age, I am determined to keep healthy, continue to move, to do the things that I want to do, make art or hike or whatever. Last week’s hiking incident made me a little paranoid. I’ve been hiking for years, although less so in the last year, sometimes because of my time constraints and sometimes because one of the dogs who often accompanies me has had arthritis issues. Which sucks, because she loves walks. But I haven’t let my knee, my ACL, my LCL, plantar fasciitis, arthritis in my foot, my diabetes, or any other acronym or health issue keep me from going out and hauling my ass through nature, and I’m not going to stop now. So there.

So the boychild and I went out and hiked this morning. We didn’t do a super-long hike…although longer than I made it last week. I did climb hills, though, and it was only about 5 degrees cooler than last week, full sun though with no shade (I had shade last week). I had plenty of water…just like last week. I ate breakfast…just like last week.

And I was fine. No problems. The only difference was elevation, and yes, that could have been one factor, but I still think that the new medication was kicking my body’s ass. So I’m glad it’s gone. I don’t want to be a scared sick old lady who can’t tromp up the side of a mountain dammit. Medication should help, not hinder (unless you’re fighting cancer, in which case, it’s gotta do its thing and you’re gonna have to survive that shit…but I’ve avoided that so far, knock on wood.).

We went back to a hike I did with the dogs fairly consistently (every other week or so) until I saw 3 coyotes out on the trail a week after being tracked by a pack of them. That was back in March or so. I wanted to go back without the dogs and just sort of explore. Part of the path had been underwater as well, so that was a pain.

The water is gone, but there are a bunch of wildflowers I’ve never seen out there…

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Everything else looked greener, more lush…

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OK, maybe not in that photo…but in general. It is Southern California. Our idea of lush is way different than someone from Ohio.

This tree was still doing its thing…I’m always fascinated with the flowers on it.

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The boy and I tried some new trails, stuff I wouldn’t do with the dogs. The brush was closer in some places, so more chance for ticks and snakes. He dragged me up this hill (you can see him at the top…he ran up there to see if it would go to the right, which is where we needed to go, but it didn’t, so he came back).

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But then we went up this other trail I’d seen someone going up once, and we found this…THIS!

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Holy crap. There’s a baby lake up here. OK, it’s a pond…but we never knew it was there.

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Baby frog in that photo (sure, he’s tiny, but he’s there)…

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We analyzed footprints…pretty sure this and the others around it were deer. We didn’t know deer were up here.

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So pretty and serene and watery.

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Then we followed what looked like an old trail, mostly coyote trail now…

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Saved some yucca pods…we’ll see if they grow or not.

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We’re hiking up on the slope…normally I walk the trail down in the valley.

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Yo. Julie. Fungus or fruit? There were dried-out pods on the trail too…looked to be filled with dirt…which is why we thought fungus. They’re right on the branch…no stems we could see. There are two smaller, yellowish ones further down the branch.

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Those pink ones…never seen them either…

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So we hiked. And I did fine. I’m happy. Gonna keep going, although my plans for next week might have just been kicked in the ass by the current weather report…over 100 degrees next week again. Ugh.

The best part? They redid this section of the road. You used to need 4-wheel drive to get through this. Now it’s Bee-YOO-Ti-FULL.

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Seriously. It’s awesome.

Yesterday I worked on the quilts. It takes about an hour to put binding and sleeves on one quilt, once the sleeves and bindings are prepped. I did the sleeves at quilt class and started prepping bindings. Then I came home and did three of the quilts last night.

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I still need to stitch down by hand the loose parts of the sleeves, but I can see a light at the end of the tunnel. I have three more to go. There’s three done…

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At 10:30 or so, again, I sat and worked on more chain stitch on the right, plus filling in one of the flowers in the orangey color.

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I had to cover the other quilts with a quilt of mine. The cats kept trying to lie on them. Kitten was very happy.

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And then I started numbering the long skinny climate woman (not-so-shorthand for it until it has a name)…

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Why do I put windows in? Why don’t I just pick a fabric that has boxy bits in it? I have such things. I did manage to tell myself that all tiny eyeballs (fish, birds, sheep) should be French knots. FK for short.

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Because the sheep feet aren’t tiny enough? I didn’t finish numbering. It was late and I knew I had to get up early to hike, so I’m in the 900s and not done. I’ll finish today sometime…after I finish copyediting and run some errands and I don’t know what else…hopefully get some more quilt shit done. I’m hoping to be done with all the copyediting and quilt stuff by Monday and to finally be FREE to be on vacation, to make art every single day (although I’ve been doing an OK job of doing some on and off, eh?). Of course, I’m still considering doing a Nida Art coloring book for my opening. If I’m gonna do that, I need to get my act together. Like now. Sigh.

*Portugal. The Man, Feel It Still

I’ll Be Here Patiently Waiting*

Well. Nothing is going quickly this summer…except the summer itself. I spent a good 8 hours yesterday quilting community quilts. The plus is that I finished the quilting. Now I’m putting bindings and sleeves on, and even though I’m doing it the quick and easy way, it’s still a lot of mileage. The first clue was when I had to cut 43 strips to make the binding. And then another 18 or so for the sleeves. I haven’t even finished one complete quilt, although I’m close. I guess my dream of having it all done by Saturday is a no go. I am going to have the copyediting done though…if it kills me.

Quilting yesterday included sewing through plant material…

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My own quilt block…

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Glitter everywhere…plus that’s the closest Trump has been to my sewing machine…

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Sleeping Kitten (shocker)…all those threads are locked down into their spools, for those who remember the thread surgery from last year.

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Here are 5 of the quilts piled up on the light table so I could trim them down. No fancy rulers for these.

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Did I mention glass shards and metallic threads pulling loose? Ay chihuahua. Never again.

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At 10 PM or so, I gave up. I did more chain stitch, this time in blue, on the right side.

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Puppy took some time to sit with me. He hears the TV go on and he runs for me and the couch. It’s sweet, but then I feel bad when I get up.

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And get up I did. I folded the quilts over (don’t want that black cat to puke on them) and I finished the last leg.

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This thing has a lot of climate change in it.

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It also has a lot of tiny pieces in it, even though I tried (not really very hard to be honest) not to draw those. (and I just realized I had drawn bones in the lower leg that didn’t continue up to the mountain, so I’m going to go do that now and probably put them above the city skyline too…because I’m fucking nuts like that…that’s why. Now you know why I had to stare at it for a while. Damn. Plus the bones in the upper leg. Now I need them too.)

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I should say that I THINK it’s done. It doesn’t have to be done until next week, I think, although I could number it if I thought it were really done. I’m a little scared to number it. No Fear! It is what it is…

*Jason Mraz, I Won’t Go Back

You Need Something Warm to Embrace*

Well all my problems are solved. I have $12.5 million dollars coming from some guy in the Netherlands who’s managing some dead guy’s estate. Of course, he had no living relatives, so I’m obviously the best choice for getting all the money.

Sigh. Morning email check is always a bust. Do you know how hard it is to fall asleep with 22 mosquito bites in unreachable places? Don’t eat outside, I guess…but it was way too hot Monday night to eat inside. Now we pay the price. Here’s Kitten demonstrating what cats do when it’s hot…they get LONGER and FLATTER.

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I can’t do either of those things.

So the good news is that I’ve made it all the way through the book I’m copyediting…one time. Well, more than one time, because I did a bunch of global changes that needed doing. But I only need one more clear read through before I can shove it off my plate (and get paid the rest). That’s a plus.

The other good news is that all of the community quilts are now pinbasted. Today is quilting day. Seriously. When I’m done with this, I’m going to shower and eat and then quilt until I die. And bind until I die. I want this shit done. Gone. Fini. Here’s the two I pinbasted last night…

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My block is in this one.

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My plan is to make it into it’s own small quilt when it comes back. We’ll see. Or I’ll make it again. Whichever.

I branched out with chain stitch last night…on the right…

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And then the girlchild posted this yesterday…

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I do miss her.

So this is one of the reasons I haven’t been able to work on this drawing (well, honestly, it was more a matter of brain power). So I moved the damn cat. Multiple times. She was not happy about it.

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And I worked on the legs…trying to remember to keep it simple, because this is not getting enlarged any more.

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I forgot I wanted a third landmass, so I added that. I briefly considered covering the bit of leg I’d already drawn, but then I didn’t. So this is how drawing decisions are made. Whoops! Forgot that. Damn. Well it will have to do.

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Not sure why one foot is so much bigger. Oh well. It is what it is. I’m not really a perfectionist.

I tossed it on the ground for a different view…

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Still have some leg bits to do, plus the stuff under the feet. But it’s almost done.

Here we are by section…

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I keep adding things up here.

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Even up here…although the top is mostly done. I’m still a bit bothered by the top left. Thinking about it.

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Why are UFOs the only thing that pop into my mind?

So I’ve put in about 2 1/2 hours of drawing once it was enlarged. Honestly, a lot of that is just staring at it and pushing the cat around.

I also had a great idea for the piece I started with the gun in it. So I need to enlarge just the guy and the gun (I started drawing more on there but it sucked). Maybe today? I have a list of errands growing again. Hate errands.

So does Kitten. She avoids them like the plague.

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Then again, she avoids a lot of things, like the grocery store and school and work and cleaning and all that. Speaking of work, we had a flurry of texts going back and forth yesterday as school released the schedule for our first day back, lots of useless professional development. Oops. I’m not supposed to be so cynical, except, Hey You Bastards…I haven’t started my vacay yet. Could you leave off reminding me that I have to go back for a bit? Really?

Yeah. I’m good. I did draw yesterday. That helped. I have to remember that shit when the other shit is getting me down.

*Gnarls Barkley, Smiley Faces

Give It to Me What You Say*

I have to say the hardest part of vacation so far is the part where I’m not on vacation and I’m making less art than I would be during the school year. I’m really just trying to bully through it and get to the other side, but it’s kinda driving me nuts. Yes! I did manage to not get onto a jury yesterday. It was actually pretty easy. I sat in the “quiet room” (there is nothing quiet about a room that is located right next to a bathroom…I heard more flushing than I ever had before in my life.) and worked on the bibliography for the book I’m copyediting…

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‘Twas a mess. I sat there and fucked with it for about an hour and a half and then they called names for one trial. And the rest of us did the No Jury Duty Dance out the door. Of course, then I spent the next 5 hours working on the Bibliography. Ugh. What a mess. I said that already. Then I copyedited one more chapter. It was about 99° yesterday. No I don’t have air conditioning. I turned all the fans on and opened windows and we ate dinner outside, but blech. Ugh. Blah. Gah.

I finally gave up on being mentally present and worked on this…

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I did a yellow-green straight stitch with fly stitches on each end, then did some lazy daisy leaves with the tail end of the thread. Up in the top right. Like you can tell, right?

Then I sat there and vegged out for a good long time. I would send tiny tendrils of what was left of my mind out toward this drawing or that one (the cat was lying on that one, the other one needs copying and a do over, the third one is just not gelling in my mind). I considered cutting Wonder Under. And then I just did some cleaning instead…going through piles of paper and tossing shit I don’t need any more. I filled a recycling bin. It was the only thing I could do.

I’m frustrated about the no art thing. Really I could have done something, if I could have fought the heat and brain lethargy. Sometimes I’m really good at that. The first week or so after school gets out? I suck at it. Seriously. Every year.

Anyway. The solution starts now. Copyedit the last 5 chapters today. Then pinbaste the last 2 quilts. I’ll quilt tomorrow and then do a final readthrough on the book and get it the hell outta here. I bought the last batting and the binding fabrics yesterday. Get this shit done so I can have some of my own brain-powered work going on. Don’t let myself sit on the couch, even if braindead. Yes, the cleaning needs to happen too, but I can’t do this no-art thing any longer. Seriously. I need to be making stuff.

*Rick James, Give It to Me Baby

We Need New Dreams Tonight*

The plus about today is that I will have a/c. I have the bibliography of the book I’m working on all ready to go, so I can skim through and check all of those citations, a relatively safe thing to do with a different version of Word. The transfer from PC to Mac and back again is never a good thing. I have a book on my iPad, some snacks, and my sketchbook. No, it’s not another episode of Draws in Bars…this is my first episode of the sideshow Draws in Courthouses, involving people who PASSED the bar. Ha. Ha ha. Yes, I have jury duty. I’ve heard every trick for avoiding it, including just throwing away the paperwork and pretending I never got it, but my civic duty has been pounded into me since birth (hence the public-school-teaching gig), so I’m going in. And hoping, because I am buried in work right now, that no one wants a cranky old barely tatted feminist-ranting lefty on their jury. Boychild says not to dress like a suburban housewife. Huh. OK. Is that something I can even do?

Anyway. We’ll see where we’re at by the end of the day. I know I don’t have time to deal with this, but I never do or will, so here we go.

I did initiate the summer officially with an episode of Draws in Bars on Saturday, watching the man’s band. I obviously started out in a stellar mood, as this end-of-times drawing shows…

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I had been copyediting all day. What can I say.

But I really like this one…not sure what it means.

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I did a lot of copyediting over the weekend, although not enough…never enough. And then last night, I sewed the second of these together and pinbasted it.

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And then I did this one, which was much easier to handle, except for that block on the left with the glass shards on it. Stabby…

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The backs are pretty easy, and I’m really happy Linda sewed them all for me. She sewed everything else together too, so all I have to do is quilt them (which is not the easiest thing in the world)…

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This is partly why I’m getting not a lot of art done…

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And today I need to go get more batting and some cheap black fabric for the bindings…which will be fused on. Trust me. I’m trying to figure out how to do the sleeves without handsewing…that’s a little harder. But I have an idea. With 6 of these, it’s gotta be easier. Not harder.

Then I did some lazy daisies and fly stitches on the left, two nights’ worth. One is in a thread that goes from orange to blue and one is a brown and orange thread.

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Anyway. Wish me luck. I’m still feeling a little off after the medication issues…been drinking lots of water and trying to eat well, although the heat doesn’t help with that. I need to get the other two quilts pinbasted tonight and then start quilting at least one a day, despite the possible jury duty. PLUS copyedit. Sheesh. Panicking. Yes, I could move it again, but I think I can only move it one more time, and I’m not sure when I could guarantee I wouldn’t have work. Sigh. Oh well. I don’t really know how to do things the easy way. I think that’s apparent.

*U2, In God’s Country

Things Don’t Feel Right Over Here*

Yesterday we had a nice hike planned, and it started out that way, but didn’t end so well. I almost wasn’t going to write about it, because on some level, to me at least, it’s embarrassing, but realizing that first of all, I do write about a whole shitload of my personal experiences on here because it helps me process stuff and get it out of my head, and second of all, I really have nothing to be embarrassed about…that shit happens and I should try to see the interesting and the good in all of it. That’s how I’ve been trying to roll for the last few years, and I should just keep on keeping on.

So we started the hike and I was fine for quite a while…it was Sunset Trail, planning to come back on Big Laguna, up near Mt. Laguna off Sunset Highway. I’ve done portions of this hike or exactly this hike maybe 5 or 6 times, so this is not a newbie thing. I was fueled by one of the boychild’s really tasty apple cheddar scones (Smitten Kitchen, amazing taste)…

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It was warm, but no warmer than other hikes. We had expected it to be a little cooler though, based on the weather apps.

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There was a wide variety of seedheads to wonder about…this one was huge.

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And beautiful views, although lacking the partial cloudiness that had also been promised.

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I took a photo here of both kids about a year ago…

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And here as well…

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I was still doing OK here. I had plenty of water and was moving slowly because of the heat, but I was moving.

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Here’s Water of the Woods…no cows this time (boychild says they were just beyond here to the right…)

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Certainly more water than we saw last year…which is partly why I wanted to come up here…to see water in Big Laguna…

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Going up the hill to the second section of Sunset Trail…this is where I started to really feel the heat…

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But I was still OK enough to see and photograph wild strawberries.

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And then sometime after that, in the next mile, my body revolted. I’ve had heat exhaustion before, but this was pretty bad. I started a new medication earlier this week that probably contributed to this…it causes dehydration and dizziness. I’d had one bout of dizziness early on after starting the med, but was fine the two days before, so I wasn’t expecting my body to just stop. But stop it did. Every time I stood up and tried to get another few 100 yards, I would feel like I was going to fall over. At some point, the boychild and I decided to call…so that’s my helicopter. I got lifted out to a local park where they evaluated me. After some cool air and rest, they released me to my promise to get electrolytes in me and that the boychild was coming back to get me…which he did. He hiked back and got the car and came to the park for me.

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I had 5 Forest Service guys, who helped out and trained a newbie on how to assist a heat-exhausted hiker who had plenty of water (I really did…this is where the med was an issue), then 2 guys with the helicopter, 3 in the ambulance, and a paramedics truck with 2 more guys in it. Another newbie was training in the ambulance. I’m glad I provided them with a willing victim on which to practice.

One of the best parts was the helicopter ride…there was no door, but I was strapped in and holding on with both hands. Pretty awesome…although as he landed it in the park, there were 17 people recording the landing with their phones. Oh yeah. I thanked everybody, except my own body, which wouldn’t follow directions. Came home, called doctor, and she pulled me off the medication. Seems that’s not what it’s supposed to do, shockingly. I’ve drunk a ton of fluids and I’m still nauseous and headachy…it takes up to three days for the medication to get out of my system.

I’m often frustrated with my body’s inability to behave. I’ve been diabetic for 15 years now and I try to deal with it the best I can, but it’s frustrating as hell some days. If you’ve seen my piece Fully Medicated, you can see the issue’s been around for a while…

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Yeah, that’s the second penis-free quilt that AQS pulled from their exhibit last year…all about managing medications and how they affect your body. I would love to be medication free, but it doesn’t happen. So I’m back to a previous medication now and trying to find a better balance, whatever that means.

I will hike again as soon as I get this shit out of my system. Although now I’m nervous about it, worried my body might fail me. No matter how stubborn and persistent my mind is, my body needs to be well enough to follow through.

I did finish Block 9 of Folk Tails last night though. This is not the 9th block I’ve finished…just Block 9. I think it’s the 7th one I’ve finished…

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This looks like the 6th one I’ve finished, but there’s another half-done double block lurking somewhere…not sure where. Attached to something else probably.

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This is Block 10. A bigger hippo this time.

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I have two nights stitched on here as well…mostly two different blues on the left, filling in the herringbone stitches with fly and straight stitches.

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On Thursday night, we did an artists’ talk at Sparks Gallery for the Allied Craftsmen show…

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It was interesting, although it would be nice to have more people show up. It is downtown though, and a Thursday night. It was nice of them to host it. The best part was hearing fellow artists talk about their work and process…sometimes what we do overlaps and sometimes it doesn’t. Turns out I’m a planner (didn’t used to be…and I wanted to do one this summer that wasn’t planned…not sure that’s going to happen at this rate). But you probably knew all that by watching what I post.

OK, so I have work planned out for the next few days. I’m hoping the nausea goes away and I feel more like myself soon. I’m hoping the new med gets out of my system and lets me exercise without feeling like dying. I’m hoping to get back out on that trail and next time pass by that meadow where the helicopter landed and keep on going, strong as I ever was.

*The Roots, Don’t Feel Right

Choose Not a Life of Imitation*

I’m glad to say the heat has shifted today…it’s much cooler. That’s a good thing, because the boychild and I are hiking tomorrow…first hike of summer 2017. We’re basically repeating a hike from last year, because I’m not willing to do 10-13 miles. I’m looking forward to it, but hoping I don’t have a repeat of the dizziness from the last two days. If it happens again today, I know it’s the new medication and I’m calling the doc. I was so disoriented yesterday afternoon that I tried to nap (and mostly failed). But eventually I felt better.

I think the catalog for the upcoming show is done…at least as far as I’m concerned. I need to get my butt in gear on these community quilts…I’ll be doing some of that this afternoon. The copyediting is going pretty well, except the topic is…well…it’s stressful. I can’t read it without thinking about how brains work and how mine fucks up and how we try to deal with our students and this is why they can’t deal. Hopefully the later chapters will have magical solutions for dealing with our kids. Yeah right. Nothing is magical when you’re dealing with the brain and trauma.

Speaking of copyediting, I need to get some done this morning, so this will be a short post. I’m jumping around on all my art stuff anyway…can’t really stay focused on one project at the moment. I have the Wonder Under ready to cut on the first climate project, then I’m still drawing the long skinny climate piece, and then last night, I ventured out into another drawing (remembering I still have another drawing that’s smaller that is barely started). Focus? Yeah right.

Before that, I did work on the hand again, continuing the buttonhole stitches around it.

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A closeup so you can see what I’m talking about.

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And then I started this drawing.

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It’s wonky. It’s scary. It’s what I needed it to be. Now it just needs to be bigger and done.

So that was my brain last night. Who knows where tonight’s brain will go.

*Red Hot Chili Peppers, Can’t Stop

Not as Daft as They Seem*

I have this goal every summer, maybe every school break, to get everything in the house cleaned up, voted out, put away, dealt with in some way. There’s too much stuff and a lot of it should just be gone, but it honestly overwhelms me on a regular basis. I started to clear off the eating table (it’s not in a kitchen or in a dining room, so I don’t know what the fuck to call it) and to put away some of the stuff that was on there, I had to clean off the bench, which meant a pair of scissors and trimming fabric. Don’t even ask. It’s a snowball effect. I’m trying to do 20 minutes or so a day, and then once I get some of this editing/art exhibit stuff under control, I’ll spend more time on some significant issues…like the garage or my bedroom. With the boychild’s help. But now, just looking at a pile of books, it’s not like I have anywhere to put most of them, with every bookshelf in the house filled, so I either have to go through and get rid of stuff, or I have to build a library into a second story, and that’s gonna take time AND money, both of which I have very little.

Yesterday I worked and I put off other work and it was hot and I couldn’t think straight. I did get new glasses though, which is good, because these are not always great. Mostly that’s because I’m tired though. I’m still tired. I didn’t sleep well last night…the cough is getting better, but I felt wired, like it was time to get up (it was…if I were going to school)…and I couldn’t go back to sleep. That will get better. I know it takes almost two weeks some years to settle into summer. It takes two weeks on the other end to get used to waking up for school, adjusting back to my work sleep schedule.

I found this in the front yard…a beautiful hawk feather. Symbolism? I will be observing more, become more aware, and then act decisively.

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It’s beautiful, whatever it means. I stuck it to the front of the house…protection against something.

I was giving this blue buttonhole stitch fingernails, or fingerrays. Or something.

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I finished the hippo and started work on the water.

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I had enlarged this again, but only 150% (I math) this time. It’s about 21″ wide, which works.

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Kitten is back in her hidey hole of paper…

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She sleeps hard. This photo reminds me that all my leftover mechanical pencils are in that leather thing behind her. I’d forgotten that.

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I added about 30″ to the bottom of this and drew out her legs in pencil, just to get the proportions where I wanted them (I won’t say “get them right” because I think she’s already out of proportion…but I’m OK with it). Then I was trying to figure out what to do about the crotch area, since this one has to be no nudity for the venue…and yes, the rocks are reminiscent of that, but they’re not that, so there. I still need to fill in that area with more stuff…

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Then decide where the third ground area is going and fill in all the rest. And remember this needs to be done by September. And it’s not the only one. Scary deadlines? Somewhat.

I also need to do a coloring book for the July opening. Yikes. I really need to get kicked off jury duty next week.

But today? Another drive to the north to finish the catalog for the first exhibit, then the chiropractor, then copyediting and maybe the gym, if I can pull that off. And quilting the community stuff, and also drawing please. I’m trying to carve vacation time out of the list of things that need doing. Plus that 20 minutes of trying to put shit away or toss it out or rehome it. And I need to meditate more. Ironic that it stresses me out to find time for meditation. And showering. And eating.

Oh yeah, tomorrow is the talk at Sparks Gallery. Again, I’m going to explain my connections to modern weaving. I think you’ll be surprised by what I’m going to say! I might be surprised too…

*Arctic Monkeys, Fluorescent Adolescent

Nobody Knows Me at All*

OK, I finally woke up without my eyelids twitching…that’s a good sign. Still coughing some. Still feel like warmed-over crap. Still tired as hell. That will work its way out, although not any time soon, I think. The heat is not helping. I don’t do well with heat.

Yesterday, everything took way longer than it should have. I set up the copyediting job…although I have yet to start. Today! Today I start! I don’t know why my brain refuses to get there…the heat and tiredness I suspect. But I need to start in case I end up on a jury next week.

So this is not my studio or my computer. I drove up to Miramar to another artist’s studio because she had the program I needed to edit the catalog for the next show.

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Lots of fussy little changes…and there were too many unanswered questions. I had to leave it. I’ll go back tomorrow to finish up. Pain in the butt…but it needs to get done.

Then I came home and pinbasted the first of these…which went OK. It was a pain getting pins in the interfacing. I thought about spray basting it, but would need to get that shit online and I can’t wait for that.

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I started the quilting, just in the ditch. Manhandling these is a pain as well…although it worked out OK in the end. I just got hot and tired and quit. I’m not doing a lot of quilting on these…just enough to hold them together. Remind me to do an easy fusible binding. I’m not even sure I’ll be able to sew the two halves together…this stuff doesn’t squish or roll easily. I have an idea of how to do it. We’ll see. Hurts my hands to do this though…can’t grab on and the pastel is coming off still. Maybe I should spray again now before I start quilting again.

I sat around for a while before I worked on this…some lazy daisies and cross stitches on the right in a greenish yellow. I feel like I should put another thing in, like the tree or the hand or the eyeball. Not sure why I feel like that. I think I need a focus.

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Not for the piece’s sake, but for mine.

So I went and got these copied, but I wasn’t thinking clearly. I need a finished size of no more than 24″. The sketchbook is 14×17″…so 200% is too big. I didn’t get far in the cut and paste before I realized it was too big.

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That was a fuuuuck moment. So that’s on my redo list for today…along with all the things I didn’t do yesterday. Plus remembering to eat lunch. Because that was an issue yesterday. Honestly it’s an issue today because I’m going to get my eyes checked (good thing the twitching is gone) for new glasses. And I’m supposed to leave in 23 minutes and I haven’t eaten anything. Nothing sounds good. Nothing sounds even edible. The heat really fucks with my ability to do anything.

I sound cranky. I feel cranky. It’s summer. I wanna be making art, my own stuff, whatever I want. And I can’t. YET. Growth mindset (that’s a teacher joke). I’ll get there.

Kitten enjoys all the things in my studio that she can lie on.

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I only got one thing done on my to-do list yesterday. Fucked up day. OK. Today I will do better. Besides the glasses, I have three things I can absolutely do, and maybe a fourth. Plus the next community quilt laid out and pinbasted. I feel like I need more room to quilt…but that’s not really an option in here. It’s just crowded. Ugh.

(OK, here’s an example of how crazy I was feeling yesterday. I was on my way home from the studio and the copy place, spent ages in traffic yesterday, and I was following this woman who had obviously been to Costco and bought toilet paper, which is one of the things on my list. I hate Costco. I really do. But we’re running out. And that’s easy. So I’m sitting there behind her at a stop light and wondering if her doors are locked, can I just get out of the car and run up there and steal the toilet paper and drive off with it. Luckily it was too hot for me to get out of the car for any reason.)

It’s OK. I will get through all this stupid angst and onto the stuff I love. I will get enough sleep. I will get rid of this cough. I will check stuff off the to-do list. The heat will ease. Hopefully.

*The Weepies, Nobody Knows Me at All