Post-It Note

Well hello there Saturday. You’re finally here. Yesterday I determined there was a full moon coming, which might have explained my students’ behavior. Or not. It was a rough week at school. Too much administrative crap. And grades are due Tuesday. And I’m not done. Or ready. Today I am working all day on school and fabric. Seriously, I have about 2 errands to run and I have to cook/prep some stuff for tomorrow, but otherwise, I’m just working until my brain shuts down. It’ll be OK. I’ll feel better afterwards because I can cross some shit off the lists that are taking over my brain. Just in the last 24 hours, I’ve crossed off a million things, like rescheduling the boychild’s flight to school because of Snowzilla or whatever they’re calling the blizzard back East. Now he’s flying Monday. Better than Thursday, which was the other offer (school starts Wednesday). I managed about 17 online issues last night and this morning, but the post-it note for this weekend still has 7 things on it. I’m really liking this method of writing it so I can see it (don’t think about the fact that last weekend’s post-it still has stuff on it that you haven’t crossed off). OK. I put two things from last week’s post-it onto today’s. Even though they won’t happen. Not sure that’s logical, but I did it anyway. I am nothing if not logical. By that I mean I’m not logical at all.

I did not do art last night. I barely did it the night before. Last night turned into a giant mess because of the flights and the girlchild’s phone and a bunch of other stuff, so after dinner, I tried to get caught up on grading and I ended up not getting it all done and just getting frustrated and then I was too tired to do anything else, so I went to bed. Sometimes that’s all you can do. I expect more today though.

I did recently put some new stuff on Etsy, if by NEW I mean stuff that hasn’t been there before, because it’s journal quilts from 2005 I think. I was part of the Journal Quilt Project that traveled to International Quilt Festival that year, and I still have the little quilts. Although there’s one I can’t find, so I haven’t put it up yet. Wait. I just found it. Dammit. Have to write something else on the post-it note.

Because honestly, I don’t remember to do stuff except go to work and make art unless my phone calendar tells me or it’s written on a post-it note. Sad but true.

So these are about 8 1/2″ w x 11″ h and I did one every other month for the year 2005. This one normally hangs on my wall…

This one is a little strange. Couldn’t tell you what I was dealing with…postdivorce?

Another one. The relationship I was in was all phone-based due to distance and it was difficult.

Another bird from last year that never sold…one of the few.

And this one! Ha. I’m not putting this on Etsy. And it has a big sister that’s never been quilted…for those who flipped out over the vulva in One Paycheck, this would give them paroxysms.

Eh. Whatever. There’s another one of the journal quilts, but it’s not up yet. My Etsy site is easy…it’s just my name. Or the link is over there to the right on the sidebar. I don’t know if my stuff belongs on Etsy or not, but I figured it was a good place to stash the less artsy quilts, the smaller ones, in case someone wanted a bird or a cat. I will probably put the birds up there as custom orders at some point. It does take time to post stuff, and I don’t have any of that at the moment. In fact, I’m done here as well. Gonna go grade (torture myself) for a while and then do fabric I think. I might have to grocery shop first. But there’s a plan to make art today, and that’s all I care about. It will motivate me to speed through the rest of it. Damn post-it note.

Less Molasses and More Lightning…

Oh My Lord the molassesness of it all. I have this to-do list that is miles long and I’m trying to get through all the things on it, one at a time, and then other crap inserts itself into that, like writing teacher recommendations with 6 essay questions that I can’t answer without interviewing the child sometimes and that means I have to find time during teaching to do that and THEN write the rec as well and administrative crap is burying me and everything takes so LOOONNNGGG. Girlchild’s phone has worked fine for months and now that she’s back in Boston, NOW it’s acting up again. Not even sure if I can handle that thing, because she might have to take the phone in (it’s an AT&T insurance thing now). Plus grades and college money and writing a new genetics test because the other one won’t work and managing science stuff in general and don’t even throw my family into that mix or the boychild who will probably have his flight cancelled tomorrow morning. Hopefully before we have to get up at an ungodly hour. And taxes and FAFSA and financial aid are all hanging over me as well, because it’s almost the end of the month.

I will get through. I went to the gym yesterday and worked out and it was glorious. Plus I got to read my book. Which was also glorious. More of that please.

Girlchild owes me $20 for making me sign her back up for the gym for a month and then never going. But the guy there saved me an additional $5 a month by changing my membership from family to single until she gets back. How am I going to spent that $5 a month? Oh joy, I do not know. Who can I hire to help me at $5/month?

I graded last night. I also spent time on the phone dealing with family stuff. So I didn’t get as much ironing done as I wanted, but honestly, I would have had to stop there anyway…I did all the stuff on the rug…a mug, a cat, and a book…

I had done the rug the night before. So at this point, I think I was up into the 50s. Pitiful amount of time for that many pieces really. I’m moving like molasses. Too tired? I don’t know. Too stressed maybe.

There’s the not-very impressive pile.

The reason I had to stop there is because the next batch of pieces is the human figure itself, which honestly is most of the quilt. I need to pick all the flesh colors at the same time so I don’t forget what I’m doing…which basically means picking about a run of 10 fabrics on this quilt from light to dark and then going through each bin and pulling all the flesh pieces, because they’re spread out from piece 60-something to 900-something. Yeah. That’s gonna be a bitch. I’m going to start tonight and finish who-the-fuck-knows-when. If I knew I didn’t have to deal with grades or flights or baby quilts or other shit in the next few days, that would be awesome, but I know none of that. Or I could come home tonight and grade for hours and be done with it (I’m never actually done with it) and then pick fabrics tomorrow. I may decide to do that. Sunday is already a goner, so I’m wiping it off the list of available days. I don’t think I can get all the fabric ironed this week. Realistically it’s not gonna happen. Not even this weekend.

Sigh. I’m aiming for Monday night done now. If I can get all the fleshy bits picked and ironed by the end of Saturday, then maybe I can pull it off. There’s a lot of non-flesh bits in there (hearts, hair, rockets and the like), but I don’t think they’ll take me long if the flesh is done. I just need to be moving faster than I am. Less molasses and more lightning.

So I was looking at this mug that’s on the quilt and thinking to myself, I drew a pizza slice on the mug. I often draw things on the mugs, although usually rainbows…very 80s. I don’t actually own a rainbow mug. I mostly use mugs I painted myself, although I’m down to one. Which sucks. I have others people have given me that fill in, although I usually drink milk out of them instead of tea (don’t ask…it’s just what I prefer). But there’s a pizza slice on that mug.

Pepperoni. I drew this on New Year’s Eve while watching sci fi. I was thinking (yet again) about being a woman, a mom, a teacher, trying to do everything and be everything to everyone because that’s what you’re supposed to do, and then I remembered last Friday, after my first week back to school, and I tell the boychild I’m ordering pizza because I can’t handle dinner and he says “I figured.” Because I’ve been his mom forever and a teacher for as long as he can remember (he was maybe 7 when I started teaching…or 6? Can’t remember.) and the first Friday back to school after a break is almost always pizza delivery. So it makes total sense that the pizza slice is on the mug. Sign of a busy mom.

It’s all gonna work out. Some things won’t get done or will get done late. And that’s how it always is. I should probably find time for meditation though. Because not doing that is kicking my butt. Gonna calendar it now.

Moving to the Next Step…

The next project is already moving…good thing, because I only have a short period of time if I’m going to get it done. Five and a half weeks, to be specific. It might not be possible. But so far, I’m doing OK. I finished cutting out Wonder Under last night, with just over 5 hours into that. Trash on the left, pieces on the right.

It was still early when I finished, so I sorted them…missing the two boxes on the right in this picture.

Apparently I have the brain power to sort pieces late at night but not the brain power to take a decent photo of them. They’re in boxes by 100s, so there are 10 boxes total. Well, that’s not true. Here’s box 11.

The Wonder Under is separating again. Sigh. It’s OK. As I iron, I go through this box and find the piece of fusible web that’s the same size as the paper piece. Or retrace. Whichever is easier. And that one piece is missing a number. I don’t usually do that…forget to write the number down. But it does happen.

I’ve been using WU for so many years and been through so many chemical compositions for this material…this last one has been the best. It releases well, but usually only when it’s supposed to. I do keep it “sealed” (not really sealed) in a bag when I’m not using it, which is supposed to help. Oh well. It makes my life a little more complicated, but it’s not a lot of pieces that released.

The next step is to pick fabrics…AND to quilt the baby quilt. I have a mostly free day on Saturday I think, but grades are due as well, so I need to deal with that. Too many things. I did not do any schoolwork last night (well, not true…I emailed myself some stuff and answered some email), because I spent all day helping kids call home about missing work. And that’s frustrating. Tiring. Even annoying. Plus watching kids do the interactive stuff on the website and then yell out, “I’m done!” Done with what? Playing around? Awesome. Go back and answer the questions and write the paragraph. What paragraph? The one I told you about in the beginning of class. But I already did the whole thing? No you didn’t. You did the playing. Now do the work.

SIGH. We have two parent meetings set up already, working on the third. A fourth is coming in with a possible meeting time today. I hate parent meetings…hate scheduling them…hate having them because 80% of the time, maybe more, nothing changes after the meeting. The kid continues whatever they were doing before and if I call the parent NOW, they get all irritated because Insert Reason Here. They’ve already come to the meeting. Why am I still bugging them?

I really need to walk away from the school stress…hence the art when I get home. The most I can…because I do have to grade things…but try to come home and be a real human instead of a teacher.

Kitten agrees. Apparently I finished that other traditional quilt so she and Midnight could fight over who lies on it every night…

The other thing I’m doing tonight is tossing some other small quilts I found up on Etsy.

Not that anything’s happening there, but it’s a place to stash the smaller things. They might sell eventually.

Ah yes, and then there’s the unnamed quilt…

It’s actually Bathtub 5, but it will need a real name…and it’s number 5 because I numbered the drawings, not the quilts. The first one is Bathtub 2. Confusing? Only to you. I know exactly what I’m doing…

She dyes her hair by the way, like the majority of women my age. The next one will have white hair. Here’s where the second owl came from…

I’m also really happy with the wine glass, although it was a heinous pain in the ass.

And those toes. Love them.

Oh look, there’s the glass. I love my photographer. It’s like he’s psychic.

And the sewing stuff. Because I sew in the bath. Don’t you? I would sew in the bath.

Maybe. Anyway. It needs a title in the next week. No, I’m not asking for help with that. It’s in my head and percolating. First quilt of 2016 though. Should redo all the pages so Recent Work is recent. Later. Not now. Now I have to go teach Punnett Squares. Then I get to move to the next step…art…not science.

I Am Installed…

OK. Deep breaths because the installation is done. It wasn’t even too painful. The pieces I really wanted to be in there are up…I had way too many quilts, but it was good, because it gave us choices. The boychild assisted in hanging stuff and was generally very helpful, even editing artist statements, which takes special skill.

And there’s Brandon, the gallery guy, helping as well. I’m not posting pictures of the full exhibit yet because I want you to come to the opening! My work plays well with James Watts’ sculptures…similar bright colors and even noses…

I brought an iron just in case…didn’t need it. You can see it in this artsy photo of a ladder.

We had hung most of the quilts by the time sculptures started arriving.

It was a little chaotic for a while until heads started being placed where they belonged.

We finished up the last wall. It’s a wide range of years for my work. A lot of the most recent stuff is traveling or can’t be shown because of rules for other shows or has to be shipped before this show closes, but I think it works well. The earliest piece is from 2003…the latest from 2014? I think?

What I notice is that I used to make much simpler quilts, but they still have presence in the room.

I was pretty emotional about this yesterday…I’m 48 years old and having my first 2-person show that I didn’t put together. I’ve been quilting for 25 years, making art quilts seriously for about 17 years. When I think about my students giving up on stuff after just 10 minutes or so, I guess I’m a little more persistent than that. I appreciate Prudence, the curator, for thinking of my work with James’…but it’s those weird little opportunities that make things happen. I don’t think I’m going to get a solo show somewhere standard, because so much of my work is challenging. Which is too bad. And no, I’m not giving up on that…I’m just waiting for the right opportunity I guess. My work’s out there. Someone needs to offer me the space.

Anyway, make me happy (if you can) and come to the opening. It’s Tuesday, February 2, from 5-7 PM at the Hyde Art Gallery, Grossmont College, San Diego, CA. It’s a college campus, so there’s no alcohol, but there are cookies! And lemonade! Or whatever they serve.

It is a relief to have that off my shoulders though. And then I came home and collapsed a little before I started putting the baby quilt together. She’s due in less than two weeks now. Had to put the dogs out to lay out the blocks and mess with them.

But I got them all together and borders on them.

Hopefully I can get it sandwiched this week when the dogs are gone and start quilting.

I also wanted to finish cutting these out.

This batch of Wonder Under is cranky…it’s separating from the backing. I thought they had solved that problem, but apparently not.

And the half page that was left took two hours. I guess the other page I did was all bigger pieces and these were tiny. I have a little more than half a page left…maybe an hour or two. Tonight? Perhaps. If I feel up to it.

I’m still fighting off this cold. It hasn’t quite taken hold, but it’s enough to slow me down a bit. Plus I’m tired from all the physical work and stress this weekend. Not very relaxing. I did finally get pictures of the newest quilt, but I’m going to hold off on posting them until the quilt names itself. Better be soon…it needs to be entered into a show.

Not a Diptych…

Long weekends should be relaxing. But they so rarely are. And now I’m sick. Oh well. Get through it. I spent a lot of time ironing yesterday and trying to organize for the show installation today. I’m a little wigged out at the moment, but it will all be better by the end of the day. Well, it will be installed anyway.

I even worked on the other quilt…basically blowing off grading completely yesterday. I did send out the team email, so I didn’t blow everything off.

My couchmate waiting for me…I will have to move the boxes of Wonder Under to sit next to her.

Then she snuggles with her head on my leg. Sweet. Slightly annoying. But she doesn’t usually complain if I move around. She’s not a good replacement for a human though. The next kid leaves Saturday…Calli has big shoes to fill.

I actually got more than half of it cut out in a really short period of time. I think that’s because so many of the pieces are the same color, so I lumped them together, and they only get cut out once at this stage. Once they’re ironed to fabric, it will take longer because I’ll have to cut them each separately.

So I might even (hopefully) finish cutting them out tonight. Although if we get done with the installation early enough and I don’t feel like shit (had to take a nap yesterday because I felt like shit), then I’m putting that damn baby quilt together. THEN cutting out Wonder Under. Then maybe torturing myself with grades.

Hopefully I can get to ironing Wonder Under to fabric tonight or tomorrow (shit, I don’t think I have a background…of course I have a background. I must have a background. Huh.). With 980 pieces, picking fabrics is at least 10 hours. So plan to be done Saturday, with trimming starting Sunday? I have a meeting Sunday. I can trim there. Grades are also due, but they’re only progress reports, so I don’t have to kill myself to get everything in. There’s one thing I want to finish and another I should do, but might not get to, so there we are.

I might get this quilt done in time. Just might.

So this morning, I rolled up all the quilts by semi-size (not really, but didn’t want them all in one roll). These are the medium-sized ones.

Up on the bookshelf are the small ones…with the large ones on the coffee table.

Finally installing. For this, by the way…

Yup. There it is. My first show that isn’t just one or two pieces with a bunch of other people. I’m sure there’s a better name than “two-person show”…like a diptych but not…a dipexhibit maybe. Except apparently the “p” belongs with the “tych”, so that’s diexhibit, which has the word “die” in it. Whatever. Taking my sore throat and my spacey head and my cranky boychild (I meant to remind him of the time last night, but I was a mopey mess) and my cold feet and going to hang a shitload of quilts. Wish me luck.

Just Keep Doing

The routine. Ugh. What did you do today? I got up, ate, went to school and taught all day, dealt with crazy stuff after school, came home, vegged out for a bit, cooked, then ironed and dehaired a bunch of quilts, and then traced some Wonder Under. Attempted interrupted sleep. Did it all over again. But then again…it’s probably that routine that makes all those quilts. Because it’s already in my head…what I’m supposed to do. Get up. Make dinner. Wash dishes so you have time and energy to make art. Do it earlier. Don’t start at 11 (although at some point, I have no problems doing that…not on the week school starts back up). Start early. Make it work. Blow off all that grading. You did enough work at school today. What is your life about? Being a teacher (a little) or being an artist (a lot). Yeah.

A frustrating hour with a parent issue and a bunch of kids who were dragged to detention by admin didn’t help. I’m about to give up on that. I’m about to give up on a lot of it. Usually we wait until April…but Spring Break comes early this year…and the lack of follow-through on the kids and the parents is just wearing me thin. Especially the little stupid things. There’s an answer key on a disk I have at home. I want to put the answer key on my school Google Drive, so I emailed it to myself. The school email rejected it because of the “type of file it is.” You mean a PDF from a school publisher? Because that’s what it is. And I emailed it to myself. Fuck me. So the parent that wanted me to make 14 phone calls yesterday in the very short time I have during the day that isn’t eaten up by everything else…yeah. Same deal.

This is why the art. So much of it.

I had one pile on the left of stuff that was ironed and had slats or dowels, but then it was getting too heavy. It’s supported by a large flattened cardboard box on two chairs and a computer desk. On the right is now the larger quilts, with a couch and a coffee table and a cardboard box full of books. Trying to keep cats off…

And dogs for that matter…

Is not easy. But it’s worked so far. I have about 18 done…and I’m not really sure how many I need, and I’m still culling. I pulled one yesterday, and there’s one in this pile that isn’t going as well. In the first pull, I just grabbed anything that might work.

These are the ones that are still in need of ironing and slats/dowels. I don’t know how many are in there, actually. I just aim to iron about 5 a night. Some have more cat hair on them than others…if there were safely rolled up most of the time (which probably meant they weren’t going to shows due to age or just whatever), then they were pretty clean. It’s the ones that didn’t get put away after they came home that are the biggest hairy mess.

But there’s progress. And that’s good. And I’ll feel a sense of relief when it’s done, that’s for sure.

I did trace for over an hour and a half, and was way more efficient than I have been lately.

Believe it or not, less tired last night. Not sure why. But I’m in the low 600s now with about 5 1/2 hours in. Only about 400 to go, so if I can do 200 each night, I’m on track. I haven’t scheduled out beyond that. That might be an issue. Cutting out Wonder Under doesn’t take much time…ironing will be another 10+ hours. Cutting out those takes a little longer than Wonder Under. Then ironing. Yeah. I can’t see that far out. I have a bunch of stuff going on this weekend, a baby quilt to finish, grades due…all in the next 10 days. Then I can think more clearly. Just keep doing is what I say. I can handle that part. Last night I did well.

Back to the Grind…

You know, the one I never left, because I graded almost every day over break?

I’m up. I’m semi-ready (not mentally, but at least in all the other ways) for school. It was not an easy wake-up call…the dog apparently needed to pee in the dark. I got up and let her out and stood there, eyes closed, leaning up against the back door, relishing the moment when I could climb back into a warm bed and continue that sleeping thing. By the time I got back to the room, the alarm was going off. Not quite dark then. Wake up time. Ugh. It’s not like I did a good job sleeping in over break anyway, but it’s nice to not HAVE to wake up before your time. I meant to go to bed before midnight, but I was tracing stuff and finally made myself stop and then was looking at something online and saw the news about David Bowie…and since you can’t trust the internet, I had to go searching for reliable sources. Sad but true. An amazing musician dead too early.

So yeah, I started tracing Wonder Under for the new quilt yesterday. I did do some prep for school, even went into the classroom, if only to realize all the stuff my custodial staff disappeared from my room, even though I drew a map of the room and counted chairs for them and all that crap. Sigh. Oh well. Who needs a teacher’s chair? Or a trashcan? It will be fine. I made a promise to myself that after the packet that’s due Friday, and my threat to call any parent whose child does not return it or who fails it (no, you may not write IDK for every answer) in order to set up a parent meeting, after that, I’m done. Any kid that comes to me for help or whose parent contacts me with a reasonable request to help (there have been some unreasonable ones), I am there for them. But I’m not chasing down all these failing kids any more. I can’t do this for another 6 months without going nuts. This group of kids is just not getting it. I’m frustrated as hell. And I can’t be. I’m putting it back on them and their parental units. Someone needs to help me do this job.

So balance it is. Art it is. I did three hours of tracing yesterday.

I didn’t get a ton done…only in the mid 200s…but it’s a start. I also need to start on the quilts…I think if I do 5 or 6 a night…iron them, dehair them, make sure they have slats or dowels with eyebolts, then roll them up…I think I’ll be done by Monday. So that’s my goal tonight is to start that as well. I’m not grading at home this week. Not gonna do it. Nope. You can’t make me. I finished all but three assignments, and one of those is half done. I did OK. Not great. Just OK. And there are more Fs now than there were before break. Also sad but true. Makes it all feel kind of pointless…because these assignments were due AFTER I counseled all those failing kids.

Girlchild leaves tomorrow. This sucks. She has both cats here, although I think right after this, she was moving her toes around and Kitten attacked. Screaming ensued and now Kitten won’t come back out on the couch.

Later she replaced the cat with a dog. A very tired dog. We’re not sure WHY she was so tired, but now she’s on the floor in my office, so apparently she still hasn’t had enough sleep.

I did drop my other quilt with the photographer, and he asked about why owls? Owls have shown up on the last few quilts I guess. Or have they? Not sure. Owls are wisdom. But they’re also protective. I’ve always put birds in. The wings, the ability to fly…all fascinating things. I’m not sure the new one has a bird…I know I thought about it…and a dog…and another cat, because there is one on the rug lying in front of the figure.

I’m supposed to provide 1-2 paragraphs about my work for the upcoming show. Thing is, I had to pull work from way back, which is cool, because some pieces have never been in a show…and they’re good enough. I just never found a show willing to take them. They never fit with the others. Hey there’s something I understand. But trying to encapsulate 10 years of art quilts in two paragraphs of explanation is difficult.

OK. Must go to work. Back to the grind. First day…no, the first WEEK is always survival. National Pie Day is coming…there’s something to look forward to. Seriously. January 23…who’s with me? Pie. Yes, my brain’s all over the map. Stay with me here. Some sanity might return.

Lots of Pieces…

Rain does one good thing for us, besides soak the ground and fill the reservoirs (I guess those are pretty good things)…it makes us stay indoors. Now honestly, on breaks, I’m kind of a hermit anyway. At some point, I don’t want to leave the house at all, because there is art to be made. And lots of it! So I do that. And I like it. Even if the weather is lovely out…which it’s not.

I have a leak in the roof…it’s been dripping very slowly through a light fixture (ever so safe, water and electricity). I suspect half of Southern California has a leak in their roof at the moment, honestly. Luckily it’s over a tile floor in a relatively unoccupied section of the house, so I’m politely ignoring it and hoping I can deal with it later…because accessing that section of the attic means pulling my studio apart. Not thinking about that. Might think about it tomorrow.

Otherwise, we’ve had 2.6″ of rain where I live…I’m such a weather geek that I have a website linked to a local weather-info-gathering station about a mile away.

And yes, in Seattle (which was sunny yesterday), this is nothing. But our annual rainfall has been as low as 3.3 inches before…our annual is somewhere around 9″/year. So getting almost that in 2 days? Roads underwater, rivers running through sidewalks, standing water everywhere. Plus no one knows how to drive in it, so when girlchild’s friend asked her to come over yesterday in the worst of it? I said nope. No. Not driving anywhere right now. Sure enough, people had to be pulled out of cars etc.

A damn good excuse to stay home and sew, if you ask me…although I did do a lot of grading too. But that’s just a survival thing. I’ll do it again today. I finished grading another assignment…and one class worth of the big unit that they turned in…just two more classes of those. I’ll do one today and one tomorrow. When I finish that one, I only have 3 assignments left to grade, and one is posters that three kids worked on, so do the math…I only have about 50 of those to grade instead of 155. Not that everyone turns in their assignments anyway. I should probably knuckle down and finish the torturous one that I did one class’ worth and then quit. Sigh.

Anyway, besides grading, I finished the drawing for the next quilt. Now this is for a deadline that I may very well not make. But I’m going to try. So it has to be within a certain size…easy enough for me to do. It needs to be a smaller quilt so I can get it done in time, right? I start the drawing…y’all have seen the headless woman with way too many arms…and then I added more.

She has 10 arms total and 3 heads (way more than anyone really needs). Each hand has an object associated with it as well.

DSCN2833 small

The drawing is about 30″ wide by 42″ high, so a finished size of maybe 40×50″? Same as the last one basically.

And I know I have about 7 weeks to finish it. With a major installation and school starting back up and grades due. But there are three 3-day weekends in there! It might not matter. I did finish one quilt in just under 6 weeks during school (well, with Thanksgiving and Winter breaks, so not really just school)…but I think it had a lot fewer pieces. Because I numbered it last night. And I was a very bad girl. I drew a LOT of pieces. As I was doing it, I was thinking to myself…that’s a LOT of pieces, Kathryn. But I did it anyway. Because it asked for them.

OK, the one I did in 6 weeks was 768 pieces…this one is 980. Big-eyed stare. OK. I own that. And I will figure it out. Either it will get done on time or it won’t.

I am one step closer to that happening though. Tracing Wonder Under tonight? Maybe.

Most of the afternoon, I spent piecing blocks for a baby quilt…

I was given the colors…cheated a bit with the one on top. Oh well!

I don’t make baby quilts often, and I always use the same pattern.

It took about 2 1/2 hours to make 20 blocks, and that’s because I was being careful, not fast.

I don’t piece particularly accurately unless I pay really close attention. Now I can lay them out…although I might wait until my parents’ dog is gone again. It’s hard enough to keep the cats off it. It usually takes about 5-6 hours for me to do one of these. Not hard. And it’s for a good person. Hopefully the baby won’t be too early, because I think she’s due in less than three weeks. It’s OK! I got this.

The post-it with tasks on it did not get much crossed off yesterday, mostly because what’s on there is huge things like “fix bookshelf” and “prep Grossmont show.” Which I really should start to do today. Like now. Except I need to grade too. AARGH. Too much. I got a lot done yesterday…and it still feels overwhelming today. Gotta work on that…the FEELING. Because the lots-of-stuff-to-do? That never goes away.

More Do

There’s a day during vacation (and this really isn’t a vacation, people…it’s way too stressful) when you realize you have to go back to work at some point and you have 700 things that still aren’t done. Yesterday was that day. Actually, it kind of feels like Every Single Day of Winter Break has been like that, where I’ve looked at the calendar and tried to parcel stuff out amongst the days and completely failed. I actually went old school yesterday and wrote the to-do list on a post-it. And then crossed stuff off as I finished it. But every time I walked past it, I wrote more stuff on it, and that’s just not helpful. I crossed off 4 things yesterday. I worked on three others, but didn’t finish them, so I can’t cross them off. And I did three or four other things that weren’t on there, but I should retroactively put them on there so I can cross them off, right? Sigh. Sigh!

Meanwhile, all of San Diego is underwater. I did manage to do my driving errands yesterday in non-rain hours (it happened)…well, except for groceries, which were flood-level hours, and that was just in the parking lot. Today is supposed to be worse (I should probably check on the garage…it gets wet in rain). I did sweep leaves out of a drain that wasn’t…well…draining…and in fact, it needs to be done again (I can see that one from this chair). Haven’t seen any roof leaks, so that’s good…it’s a relatively new roof. But it gets gloomy and cold, and I don’t want to run the heating and turn all the lights on unless I have to…too much money. So I rummaged through the firewood and started a fire around 3 PM that (due to the monster-sized pieces of wood from trees that have fallen on my property) kept going until well after midnight. And warmed up that part of the house and looked nice as well.

Artwise, I didn’t finish the binding. Dammit, I need to email the photographer (write it on the list). There are 15 things on the list for today. I need kid assistance on some of them. Artwise, I cut and taped the headless drawing and then started working on it…this was the after-3PM activity, with dinnermaking and some grading tossed in for variety.

So I knew I wanted to add some width, although not a lot, to this drawing, and it definitely needed a head, so some height. Maybe more than one head. She’s already got 6 arms. Again Kali is where I started…I always think of moms as Kali, many-limbed destructive forces, but still earth-mother-like. Earth Mother doesn’t always have to be nice. Nature isn’t always nice. And that’s kind of where I stopped drawing Kali and started drawing something more in the mom range. We do many things, multitask (have post-its with too many things on them), and yet we’re juggling all those things in a not-so-healthy way sometimes. I read somewhere this morning about the purpose of marriage (or partnership) not being all the religious, societal stuff, but just to have a partner to help with all the crap in life. You aren’t the ONLY one emptying the dishwasher and cooking the food. You have help.

Oh My Lord. And there it is. Because I think that’s all I’ve ever wanted. I’ve spent years without it honestly, even with grown-up kids (they’re gone a lot), so many tasks have to be managed or directed or whatever. And I’m so tired of that. Just walk in the house and do what needs to be done. Someone walk in and fix the stuff I don’t have time to do…take a look at that post-it and cross something off of it (because you did it…not because you’re being a smartass).

Anyway. So I added paper to the sides and the top.

Then I started adding arms and a head…I did start with pencil at one point…just to make sure I didn’t screw it up too badly at this stage, although I’ve cut off the additional drawing before and started over, so that’s always an option.

And I kept going. There’s a lot of time spent staring into space or at the blank parts of the drawing, figuring out what fits there. I remember one college painting professor getting mad at me because I don’t draw all those iterations…I do them in my head. He wanted 30 or 40 sketches for each painting. I did one or two. And then argued with him about the waste of time to put them all on paper. They were in my head. He said I wouldn’t be able to do that forever. Well. OK. Maybe so. But I’m still doing it now.

So that tree took a while to appear. I am timing this part of the drawing process…

I don’t usually keep track of the time I take doing drawings in the sketchbook, but I do on the enlarged drawings because it’s usually the harder part, and I like to know how long it takes. HOURS. It takes hours.

And at some point, my brain craps out and stops looking. Hence the liquid paper on the left arm and thumb. Walked away after that.

Granted, it was late. I’d been drawing (well, or thinking about drawing) for an hour and 20 minutes. At some point, it’s diminishing returns. I’ll finish today. And number it. And then figure out a schedule. Can’t really do that without a piece count. This one will be tight. I might not make the deadline. But the quilt will still be a good thing. So I’ll do it anyway. And I already have one in line behind it. Aack!

Because of the cold rainy day and the fire in the fireplace, I had cats…

Any time I sat on the couch, there they were. In fact, Kitten is sitting on the quilt that needs its binding done. You can tell I grade here too, right? Notebook, 17 colors of pens (I might as well enjoy the grading with pen color choices, right?), piles of papers. Ugh. Need to do more of that this morning. In fact, it’s the next thing on my list unfortunately. Which is why I’m still writing. Procrastination.

View of the driveway during some of the worst of it.

It’s a giant pool of water. Yes, I know it rains where you are…but like I said yesterday, when we get our average annual rainfall in one week, we all freak out. Strangely, it’s sunny right now. It wasn’t 10 minutes ago…it was raining. But there’s another inch and a half coming in the next 24 hours…after flash-flood warnings yesterday. So if I had errands that needed driving, now would be the time…except I’m missing the kids, and they’re the ones I need to errand with today. Ugh.

OK, grade, draw, cut, organize, prep. Those are the things I need to do today. Less worry. More do.

Dark Blue on Dark Blue in the Dark…

Progress is slow, but at least I’m moving in the right direction. Now if someone would just clean up the kitchen besides me. I had professional development all day yesterday on coding, which I’m actually OK at, but there still isn’t a clear and easy way to use it in science without sitting down and reading a 38-page PDF. It’s interesting that we walk away from 6 hours of “learning” and I still don’t have something I can use in the classroom without spending more time and energy of my own. But that is how it always is. So I stash it away (with the giant-ass book, yet another one) in my cupboards and will try to implement it at some point, but probably not this year, because I don’t know where it would fit in our current curriculum and I’m finding that this year is already pushing my buttons.

I also graded yesterday, which caused a few panicked emails after midnight last night from students who hadn’t turned in that assignment. OMG! More work. Another assignment to be graded today. I want to start with my head above water next Monday…because it will quickly be under again, right?

Already I have 10 12 things on my to-do list for today, and some of them require going out in the rain…over an inch today. Amusing, since some years we total 5 inches of rain in the whole year…they’re guessing close to 4 inches here just this week. I have a garage that has leaking issues, so boychild and I went down last night and made sure there was nothing cardboard or paper on the floor. Many years ago, probably the last serious El Niño, we put everything up on shelves so that when the water leaches down the slope through the wall into the garage, nothing is ruined. It let me throw some more stuff away too.

I was up late finishing the machine stuff on the newest Bathtub quilt, hallelujah. It took another hour and 20 minutes of quilting, running out of thread (this is why I braved JoAnns hell on Saturday), quilting dark blue on dark blue in the dark (the lighting in here sucks)…

Nine hours and 34 minutes total in the quilting…that was less than I thought. Less breakage than on the last equivalent quilt? Less stuff to fill in? Who knows. Just glad it’s done. Don’t get me wrong…I like this quilt, I like quilting…but school is rushing towards me and there’s a lot of stuff going on in the next two weeks…enough that I’m doing a lot of deep breathing and reorganizing my brain to take it all on.

There it is…like you can see it. I ironed it to get it relatively flat. Mostly my quilts are flat anyway, but ironing helps because I do quilt heavier in the background than in the image. I know real quilt people want even quilting density all around, but I don’t. I want the image to pop, and it does that when I don’t quilt evenly between background and foreground.

Laid it out and stared at it for a while, because it’s not gonna be straight no matter what…and that wonky is OK. There’s no actual straight lines in the quilt. It’s the way my brain is…sorta wonky…made even wonkier by old-lady hormonal surges and fluxes.

I like her. I like her better than the last bathtub quilt. It’s good that I like my own work, isn’t it? (laughs)

I had another backgroundy fabric that I had considered for this one, but I’m glad I didn’t, because it was just a tad darker than this one and worked perfectly for a binding. I have a hard time with binding colors on these dark blue quilts…and yes, I make a lot of dark blue quilts. It’s a good background for the images I do. But you need something darker or a color from in the quilt to work as a binding. I don’t like using the same color, because then it doesn’t frame it. I like the eye to have a place to stop at the edge and then bounce off and wander back in. See. I did have art training. So there.

Anyway. I still have to do all the handsewing.

And email my photographer. Because this sucker is done early (well, if you look at deadlines) and that’s good, because I need to get another one done in less time. Which might be nuts. That’s one of the things on my list for today…tape together the enlargement and finish the drawing…which could be a good 5 or 6 hours of drawing.

But first, venture out into the rain and get the driving errands done. Should have grabbed some firewood for the fireplace…it’s going to be cold all week and I don’t really want to jack up the heat. Hmn…pollute the air? Or make my utilities bill horrendous? It’s a tough call. I only use the fireplace about twice a year anyway, so I’m not sure I feel too bad. I’m sure my footprint is entirely too large anyway, being a carnivore and a quilter (fabric dyes, cotton, electricity for all stages).

Crap. Now I need a name for that quilt too. Sheesh. OK. While I’m sewing on the binding. I know what this one is about (just like the last one)…so I’ll let that percolate.