Writing is hard, y’all. OK. Not for me. The words spill out of me like drool, honestly. But that’s practice. I wrote my first blog post in 2004. Even writing essays in high school and college, I just sat down and let it pour out. I’d do one readthrough and that was it. Done. And that was back in the day of typewriters and that weird white tape you’d type over to cover up whatever you’d mistyped. I can’t remember why I used that over liquid paper. Because you didn’t have to wait for it to dry? It wasn’t as lumpy? There’s a fine line between coverage and lumpy. MY ANALYSIS OF LIQUID PAPER. Exciting stuff. But often frustrating. But writing? Writing this every day lets my brain just spill all this crap out, plus I make plans for the day and the rest of the week and projects, holding myself accountable for shit. It’s probably how I can get so much done, even when it feels like I’m getting NOTHING done. Do I want to be sitting here the next morning thinking WTF I did nothing? Well that happens sometimes and it’s OK when it does. But making art makes me feel better as a person about the other stuff, so I want to be damn sure I’m doing it. Lots of it. Tell my students it gets easier when they practice? Uh. They don’t want to practice. They get frustrated. Sometimes I wonder why I work so hard at their writing in science, and then I remember how you keep the really high level science jobs. You write. You communicate in words. You document your shit. Sigh. They have to write so much on the state tests and some of their writing is so difficult to read. So no, I didn’t grade any of the other written assignments last night. That stuff just hurts.
Meanwhile, I’m up early for another parent meeting. Maybe this one will actually show up. I’m not sure if I should email the one who didn’t show up yesterday and make some comment about how I have to get up early and get to school early and set up my classroom early to prepare for their being here, and even go pee early so I know I get to pee before school starts, but their lame-ass behavior, like if it’s an emergency and you couldn’t make it, then call or email, but don’t just blow me off. Annoying. So many of those this year. And then they never reschedule. The kids react to it too…they’re all worried about the meeting and then when the parent doesn’t show, then what does that tell them? Sigh. Ugh. Parenting is hard too, but you still gotta do it.
Lecture aside. For now. I won’t have a voice for it in class. I gave a quiz yesterday. I graded it last night. All of them. 160 or so. Good stuff. Still behind on grading other stuff, but I’ll get there. While I was grading, Kitten kept sitting on all the papers…so I turned on Cat TV for her.
Not that it stopped her from sitting on all the papers…she did watch the birds though.
I graded until about 9:30 and then started ironing…I hit the tiny pieces stage…
Her thighs have a lot of nature on them…these California poppies and the bees we’re trying to keep alive out here.
Plus a Joshua tree, a turkey vulture, and some cactus.
I wanted to get further last night, but these are tiny fussy things. I got about half of the 600s ironed…maybe a little more than that. I have another couple cactus to iron and then the monarchs…speaking of fussy. A rattlesnake, a bunch of toes, legs…and then that’s it. I have a science meeting after school today, though. I wanted to be ironing to the background tonight and I’m having to revise my plan. I suspect I’ll be lucky to get to that. So I’ll hope I get it all ironed together tonight…I’m still on track, still OK. Mostly. Still tired. Still got too much work to do. Still wondering what I’m working on next. Still don’t know what to get my dad for his birthday. All the things in my head. Plus I want to read my book. And be healthy enough to go to the gym. Ugh. One thing at a time…well…unless I can do two.
Kathy Nida 