Don’t Know What It Means…*

Tired this morning. Puppy has been Mr. Barks-a-Lot the last two nights. Not sure what living creature is offending him now…sometimes when he’s barking out the window I think he must be able to see eddies in the wind that none of us can see. Or ghosts. Or he hears dogs barking five miles away and they are warning of impending tsunamis…now he’s got the big one barking too. For nothing, as far as I can see.

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Maybe he’d bark less if he didn’t have all day to sleep. I don’t have this luxury, unfortunately. It’s not all his fault…some neighbor was making noise before 6:30 as well. Sometimes I think I need a padded bedroom, against noise and light and all intrusions. Certainly I’m sure someone’s designed it better than mine. Some noise catcher that grabs unnecessary dog barks out of the air and turns them into something else.

Yesterday we started a new unit, the last one besides the sex ed unit we teach at the end of the year. I kinda went overboard on the cover page. And I still need to color it.

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Which should be less of a priority than grading probably (but is more fun).

Came home and ate and watched Walking Dead with my favorite couchmates…although I was not the lap of choice for once…dog nose being warmed by cat.

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They like each other.

OK, I added some pink to the blue squares at the bottom…straight stitches, lazy daisies, fly stitches.

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They look a little like vulvas. Seems appropriate. There’s too much blue and pink at the bottom…need to fix that.

Then I had a choice. Grade or trace? I really want to hit this deadline. Yes, I still have to grade. I just didn’t have it in me yesterday. I did enter a show, so it was already a late start. I don’t like grading after 9 PM. So I traced…for a long time. In the dark background, you can see puppy…waiting for me to sit with him.

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I got to piece 613, which is the neck. So all I had left was neck, head, and crown of fire (don’t ask), which was about 84 pieces. But it was 12:15 AM. And finishing would have been another hour. And that’s not responsible.

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Aargh. So I guess I’ll have to try and finish tonight…although I am going to see Neil Gaiman tonight.

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Definitely a worthwhile way to spend my time…but it’s hard to walk away from all the crap that needs doing. Workaholic. Yes. So grade if I have time, but definitely finish tracing. Then tomorrow is cutting…schedule is tight. But if I get the whole mess ironed down before we leave on vacation, I could take the cutting task with me. Maybe. I’m a little worried about this timeline, straight up.

*Nirvana, In Bloom

What You Gave to Me the Day I Wandered*

Spring Break must be close…I made my trip travel list last night…at least the first version of it. I’ll have to borrow some stuff off my dad, who has all the camping equipment in the world. I’ll need a good book or two to read. I think I’ve actually finished everything that was on my Right Now list…waiting on two books from the library, maybe three. It’s OK…I’m not leaving this weekend. I have NINE whole days of school left before I’m allowed to leave. And in that time, I have 17 thousand things to grade, my taxes to finish, a quilt to get significantly closer to done, and if I look too closely at the house and yard around me, I’ll persuade myself that I shouldn’t take time off.

Yeah. Well. I’m gonna need to take some time. I’m still grading the climate projects. It’s hurting less, because I’m almost done…although trying to watch the videos when Kitten decides she wants my attention and stands in front of the screen is a pain in the ass. I have 18 left. Well, I SHOULD have 18 left, but I’m betting some of those kids didn’t do the video, so that’s much faster to grade, although hard on them.

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That’s the hardest part of creating curriculum…seeing how much work you’re going to have to do before next year so you can get more of what you wanted out of them. I’m trying to be smart and take notes…maybe even start rewriting rubrics now. Maybe.

So I was sitting here writing, listening to the pool motor straining, thinking…what the hell? The water level is high enough. So something’s caught in the basket…go out there. Sure enough. Well that explains the skunk smell. Poor thing…I do like wildlife, even when it smells bad. I’ve pulled possums and gophers out of there before, but never a full-grown skunk. I always feel bad when that happens. Like I should have done something to protect them more. Sigh.

Um. Let’s see…oh yeah, I made boxes out of the triangles at the bottom and added a lazy daisy stitch, and then used up the rest of the thread in French knots, which I do a lot.

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While doing that, three of the four animals in the house came by to lie on me…you can’t see the black one, because I couldn’t get her in the picture as well. You should also be impressed by how my shirt (from school) matches the pajamas and socks I put on when I finally got home last night.

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I got up eventually (it was pretty late by then) and started tracing. I got into the water, which is always a pain in the ass to trace. Figuring out where stuff overlaps and drawing these wild pieces that are all loopy and swirly…can drive you a little bonkers.

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That’s what I get for drawing bathtubs full of water, right? I have not learned my lesson.

So I think I’m in the 400s…like 428 is next or something like that. So I have about 200 pieces to go…but the water ones take longer than normal pieces because they’re so complicated.

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I wanted to finish tracing water last night, just because it’s easier to keep in my head what is overlapping what if I do it all in one go…but then I looked at the clock and it was late. And then I couldn’t even go to sleep, so that sucked. My brain was ready to keep going. To the END! Yeah. Well. That’s the same brain that will get irritated by behavior today, so I have to manage it a bit.

My ex brought me a lemon…with the dog’s pills. She’s now on official arthritis meds, plus more anti-inflammatories, and higher doses of the joint meds she’s been on since she was little, plus some salmon oil. It’s a lot of stuff, but hopefully she’ll feel better.

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She’s obviously aging. Poor girl. I don’t know what to say about the lemon, except that I’m kind of impressed it kept growing, despite its obviously limiting circumstances. It smells very lemony.

So I don’t know if I’ll get through tracing all 200 pieces tonight…which is unfortunate, because I know I have stuff Wednesday night that will go late. And I want to get this thing to the next step. I wonder how hard and fast the next deadline actually is (I’ve been trying NOT to think that, but…it might need to slip a little). Yesterday was a lot of overwhelmedness…too many things to get started and done. A lot of those are still hanging over me today…but that’s kind of been this school year. You are overwhelmed and you will take it all in and breathe deep and then go hike somewhere to try to dispel the panic. Yeah. I could do with less of that. I’m feeling a bit like that lemon.

*The Proclaimers, I’m on My Way

But Forget It All, I Know I Will*

I spent a lot of time grading student assignments this weekend. I’d like to say I’m done, but I’m not. I think I have 23 to go…which sounds like a lot to the part of my brain that will have to watch all those videos. I’ll get through them, but I wanted to be done. I often want to be done with the work part so I can go on to the art part…a split in my life, when normal people plop down on the couch and watch some TV to wind down, I’m getting up to stand for the next two hours, tracing. Which is in fact what I did…eventually…

I did finish the other quilt; well, the binding anyway. I need to do some other stuff to it. I think. Photos will follow. It won’t be officially photographed until the end of April, with the other one, which doesn’t exist.

I’m reading this book that I’ll write about later…but I liked this quote in the frontmatter with regard to art…

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And that might have been what Marker referred to (haven’t seen the movie), but in the context of what I’m reading, it becomes much darker. I still like the quote though. More about my reading later…not today; got a parent meeting. I’m already behind and overwhelmed.

I drew this Saturday night while watching the band play…

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I had done a drawing back in January and had some false starts in the sketchbook, so I turned one of them into something.

Here’s another false start…

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We’ll see what I do with that.

I had to take a walk yesterday to clear my head after grading stuff. I was getting irritated. Getting outside and touring the neighborhood trashcans is always nice. (I actually do just look at plants and the sky…the dog is more interested in the trashcans.)

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Wildflowers abound.

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I skipped Saturday’s stitching…so I did two yesterday. I started a wacky bird to the right of the tree. It’s not done. And then I did the blue straight line triangle shapes on the bottom. I saw someone else stitch something like them, so I wanted to put them in there. So I did.

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Still not sure I’ll (a) make it all year on this and (b) have room to stitch all year on this and (c) be able to stitch on it during my trip over Spring Break. But that last bit is fixable and the first bit is no guilt and the middle bit is. Well. It just is.

I then continued to trace Wonder Under for the next bathtub…this will be the third one I actually make of the six or so bathtub drawings I’ve done.

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I got an hour and a half or so in last night…there’s only 630 pieces and I have 350 done.

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I’m hoping to be done Tuesday…then cutting them out…then hopefully ironing down to fabric by the weekend. We’ll see. The timing on this one is really tight.

I got this thing called a Rocketbook. You can draw in it with special pens (downside) and then there’s an app that will scan it and send it where you need it…like all the ones where I mark the rocket picture at the bottom, it will send them where I tell the app all the rockets go. So I can have one for drawings and one for school stuff and one for art notes and one for one art group I’m in, etc.

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The coolest part though is that when the book is full, I can microwave it and it will be blank again. So last night I tested it out with a really quick, simple drawing, just to see how it worked. The pens are OK…they’re erasable though, so that’s cool. Anyway…it’s just something techie that I thought was really cool and wanted to try out. Plus I have a staff meeting today and I’m not allowed to bring tech and this is kind of like tech in that I can scan the notes and mark the apple, and they’ll all go to my Google Drive for school, to the folder I tell it to send all my staff meeting notes. And that’s cool. Even though I’d rather just type them. No time.

OK, parent meeting (OMG, are we just realizing our kids are failing?) and school and at some point I get to make art. My daily goal…get all the other shit done (or done enough) so I can art.

*Squeeze, Tempted

Now That She’s Back in the Atmosphere*

Well. Tired. Yup. Need more sleep. I try. Well, not very hard. But I do try. There’s just a space between enough sleep and happy because I got to make art, and I lean towards the latter. I also know that should be “toward”, but it sounds weird. Regional vernacular. See even when I’m bloody exhausted, I can figure out grammar. And that’s important. Ha! It’s really not. But whatever.

So yesterday I had quilt class, for the first time since I think September. It’s not going away for a while…but eventually my teacher will move north to her incoming grandchild and I’ll have to find another group of like-minded women (this might be incredibly difficult) who meet locally (also difficult). Sigh. But not now. So that’s good.

I wanted to be handsewing the binding at said meeting, but that would have meant even less sleep the night before, so I just got everything ready. And it’s probably good that’s all I did, because when I started sewing last night, I realized I had been a math dumbass (not surprising after midnight…math is not my strong point and it was an improper fraction too) and had to recut the binding. But the question of what to do at the meeting was easy enough, because I do have another deadline looming (they always loom…they don’t ever just come in and sit down for coffee and biscuits, let alone come in and start doing the dishes)…so I started tracing the Wonder Under for the next quilt. I don’t usually overlap when I’m working, unless there’s a jump in line. I have a couple of quilt tops that aren’t stitched down, for example. And some others that aren’t what I would consider serious art quilts that are in stitchy limbo. But generally I get all the way through one before I start the next one. I think a one-day overlap on these two is not a huge deal though.

I got a little over an hour in and about 100 pieces traced. Hopefully more tonight, but we’ll see…because I had to grade last night and I will have to grade tonight and perhaps every night until June 15.

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It’s such a relief when I don’t have to grade. So rare too.

I started doing flowers on the left side…but I only did every other one. I’ll have to figure out how I’m going to keep handling that.

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Then into the room of fabricky goodness, where Kitten deposited ALL the fur on this quilt. Bindings on, sleeves on…

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Pinned down. Yup. Used an existing fabric, which luckily I had enough of to cut another set of binding strips that were 5/8″ wider. Sigh. I hate to waste fabric. See the cat hair though?

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I think she needs a bath. Not that a bath will solve the hair problem.

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So now it’s all ready for the handwork. Woo hoo! Finished in March. Leaving me 5 weeks for the next one, except I will be gone for one of those weeks. YIKES. OK. Deep breaths. I got this.

Now I know you just come here for puppy pix…and he’s not a puppy…just a little furry asshole.

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Who is often cute. And bitey.

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But yeah…lots of tummy rubs and scratches were needed last night…and this morning, I need to get my butt out of here. Like now. Yikes…

*Train, Drops of Jupiter

Tell Me Darlin’ Please, Tell Me True*

Look! It’s March! Not February! Did anyone notice February? It’s so short. March is a weird month…if Spring Break comes in March, then it’s a nice month, usually punctuated by spring flowers and temperatures, bright blue skies and fluffy clouds, the first sunburn of the year if I go back to the soccer years, mostly because I would have forgotten sunscreen after months of winter (OK, we don’t have much in the way of winter here, it’s true). It’s also my birthday month, which isn’t really a big thing for me, but it’s a day in March. If it’s a school day and kids find out, then it’s a cross between really annoying and amusing. If you’ve never had 90 7th graders sing Happy Birthday to you in the morning, then you don’t know what I’m talking about.

But when Spring Break doesn’t come until April (and this year, not even the first week in April), the month seems to stretch out almost as long as October…a vast expanse of five 5-day weeks where students are losing their minds to pubescent hormonal slush and dreams of summer. This year is one of those, so February slammed by like a drunk clown, but March is gonna stretch out like a bad cold, uncomfortable and exhausting. The plus? Spring Break is coming. It will be here. I see it (I don’t actually…but maybe I will later this week, once I’m done with grades).

Yeah, I’m still sick and maybe a bit delirious. Sorry. I left my cold meds at school yesterday, so I had to go out last night to get more, and the nice pharmacy woman was only a little amused by my discombobulation. Sinus stuff gets me all wiggy. Can’t think straight.

So last night was not the most productive evening of all time, but shit happened. I put more leaves on …different color thread and different stitch. Gonna keep doing that.

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Then I was trying to finish an episode of something I was in the middle of watching, so I finally used the white pencil I found (at a store…ironically, last night, when cleaning the studio, I found one of the ones I had here)…and did the concentric circles behind the bird.

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Yeah, they’re wonky as hell. I like it. This block is done now. So that’s two! Wow. You don’t even wanna know how many months I’ve been working on this block. First there’s about 98 bullion knots in it.

Then I came in here and dealt with the mess. First I had to put all the fabrics away from the last quilt, which wasn’t a small amount. I always clean up the fabric stash between quilts. Helps me think. I like everything put away to start.

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I do need more storage though, and since this room can’t take any more storage, I’m going to have to dream about a larger space. I actually wouldn’t want to move the studio into one of the kid’s rooms (like they’re ever going to move out), because I like my corner view here…but who knows. Maybe I’ll go two stories just for more storage…some sort of loft thing. (Yeah right.)

Then I sorted the first 100 pieces. Sheesh, that’s some tiny shit there.

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Even the drawing, seen from across the room…it’s so small compared to the last one. It won’t take long…

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I didn’t actually start ironing anything, because it was it was almost midnight when I got to here. And I’m sick, so I should probably go to bed earlier (ha! I couldn’t breathe well enough to fall asleep quickly). Ugh. Colds suck. They just drag on forever.

If I feel well enough after school, I’m going to walk the dogs. They’ve been pretty impatient with me the last few days. They’re used to a lot more weekend entertainment than I gave them (rain didn’t help…they got a 2-mile walk)…and this weekend is a repeat of last weekend…they’re stuck with me again. If I don’t feel well enough, I will sit in the hallway and throw balls for them until they quit. But I also need to grade tonight, because I couldn’t deal with it yesterday. And then ironing stuff to fabric. That’s something to look forward to.

*Sarah Jarosz, Tell Me True

Raining in My Head Like a Tragedy*

So 3+ inches of rain later, the house is still here, hasn’t slipped down a slope. All the trees are still standing. The pool, which we finally got blue again (I really shouldn’t say WE, because I didn’t do a lot) is now green again. My pool guy is not gonna be happy. I tried to explain the chemistry of rainwater to him, but he likes to blame dirt and trees (there’s no tree stuff in the pool at the moment). Today? Sun. Oh yeah. I can do that. Looking forward to it, what little of it I might see. That blue sky I see out the window looks nice.

There was no need to go out after school yesterday. If I hadn’t been sick, I might have gone to the gym…but since the first thing I dealt with was this…

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I showed her where the open garage door was. She sat down in the rain and looked at me pitifully…and when I came to pick her up, she was sopping wet and kinda frantic. I have two towels in my car for a reason. She was a mess.

Then I graded for a while. At some point, it becomes a lesson in crazy lack of understanding…

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(head. not bread.) Yes, sometimes I have weird warmup questions…makes them think. Some more than others, I guess. (I would not put MY phone into the bread…)

I started doing leaves. It needs a lot more.

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Damp dog trying to get as close to me as possible…after stitching, I finished trimming all the tiny little pieces…

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Some of them really are small…but most importantly, I forgot to number that one on top. Annoying. I’ll figure it out eventually.

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Then I sorted them all. So yeah, I’m sick, but not so sick I can’t make art. It’s a good marker actually…did I go to work (almost always)? Did I make art (need to be able to concentrate and/or stand…so that’s a bit more complicated). Did I eat? (I made breakfast for dinner…was not really in the mood for food…typical when I’m sick). I am not better today, unfortunately. Breathing was an issue last night. Hopefully tomorrow.

It didn’t take long to sort them…it’s a small quilt!

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I keep saying that because it’s kind of a surprise that things aren’t taking days DAYS to get done. I should always do a smallish quilt after a big one, just to give me a good frame of reference. Or maybe it’s like a palate cleanser. And then later, after some smaller ones, I’ll want to get sunk into a big huge one again. That’s usually how it goes. Summer break…big quilt.

That dog never did leave me alone…

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And then, since I wasn’t going to start ironing last night (that’s a bit TOO much standing, plus it was after 11 PM), I tried that drawing again.

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That’s better…although I’ve lost the rest of what was in my head. It’ll come back. At least I got the chains right. Although I might try this again. I don’t know. Sometimes it takes a while to get it right.

Unfortunately I have to be at school early today for a contentious meeting. I love those. Really. (not) With tutorial after school, I should be well and truly exhausted by the end of the day. My goal is to get the fabric cleaned up in the studio, pick a background fabric, and maybe start ironing. I’d like to start…I just don’t know if I’ll have it in me…we’ll see. There’s no planning for sickness in the middle of this crazy schedule…just play it by ear. Hopefully I’ll be feeling better.

*Eurythmics, Here Comes the Rain Again

I Got Sunshine in a Bag*

It’s pouring again. Ugh. Spring, my ass. OK, I know we don’t get much rain…and we usually need it…but sheesh. I can’t get the garage to dry out. At least the roof isn’t leaking. That’s a plus. I’m trying to decide what to do with the old lady dog. She doesn’t like being out in the rain, and she can’t stay inside all day. I can’t leave her here, because she escapes my yard, plus it wouldn’t matter, because she won’t even go in the dog house (it’s possibly too small for her). She just stands out in the rain, looking pitiful. I understand. I’m sorry. I say that to her a lot. Usually when there’s a puppy biting her face and she swings her head to look at me with those eyes. I understand. I’m sorry. You’re a good dog.

So was the weekend a success? Well shit got done. It’s never enough, but it’s something. I still have kids trying to turn in late work. I made it through three assignments. I have seven to go plus all the makeup work that was turned in on time (cue hysterical laughter). One assignment might magically disappear. One might push into next trimester. We’ll see. I don’t know what to tell the kids who turned stuff in late. I don’t believe in prayer, but it might help them.

In the art world, I seem to be doing OK. I picked up photos of the new big quilt…

Art Quilts and Fiber Arts

I’m not showing the whole thing until the opening in July…sorry. She was supposed to be a triptych…then a diptych…then she was just big enough to be on her own. I still plan to do one more new one, but the deadline is tight and the one I’m working on now is NOT that one. Don’t think about that.

There was a bit of sun yesterday for Kitten to happily sleep in. With my old hub. My old cranky hub. (not husband…an actual hub from my computer)

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I’m sick, by the way. That is not helping. Yesterday I sneezed out part of my brain.

I sat on the couch last night to do my one stitch, and within seconds, I had both of them. One on each leg.

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Makes it hard to move. I felt bad when I had to get up. I did the pink lazy daisies coming off the bush in the “r” in Prosper.

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I did then finish tracing the newest quilt. Yeah, it’s a lot smaller. I forgot how fast small quilts go.

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That said it has a ton of tiny pieces. Well, only 532 pieces, but because it’s small, many of the pieces are small. At least in the last one, I made an effort to keep it simple. Well, simple for me.

It was still early enough for me to start cutting them out. (Notice puppy is back on my leg.)

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I actually got about halfway through. Again…small quilt. It’s only one yard of Wonder Under…the last one was like seven yards. I should be able to finish tonight and maybe even sort them.

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Between grades and being sick, though, we’ll have to see. I’d like to be ironing by Wednesday. Does that seem reasonable? I don’t need to buy any background fabric. I have a bunch of pieces to choose from on something this size. I don’t know if I’m trying to remind myself that big pieces are a big drain on time and resources AND a pain in my ass, or if I’m just rejoicing in the fact that this one is NOT like that. I do like big pieces. They got punch. They take over a room. I like that. Well then…

The dogs do occasionally sit together…more because Simba was already there and Calli isn’t going to stop being where she wants because of him.

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He is slightly nervous about it.

Anyway. Let’s hope for quick recovery on the cold, plus lots of efficient grading and artmaking this week. The rain will be gone by tomorrow. At least I don’t have duty at school this week. I had enough rain when I did have duty. No, I didn’t draw. I wanted to, but it was late…and when I’m sick, I try to get enough sleep. TRY. I said try.

*Gorillaz, Clint Eastwood

Words Like Violence; Break the Silence*

First, here’s a photo that’s kind of what my brain looks like at the moment…

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That’s an impressive piece of sidewalk. So the concrete is my brain, and the dark gray cracks and dirt are school and all the crap I have to get done and deal with. Like closing the gradebook yesterday and having about 40 assignments show up after that. Because I can’t tell time? The real questions are (1) how big of a bitch am I? and (2) can I even get all the grading done that was turned in on time anyway? We’ll see. The green though! The green is artmaking. So that’s a good thing.

So I figured out the piece of wool in the bathroom. It wasn’t me. It was Kitten. Or Midnight. Or both of them. Because another piece was left somewhere yesterday. So I think Midnight pulled them out of the bag (one at a time, because I was organizing the other night, so I know the other piece wasn’t out of the bag), because she’s the one who goes in bags and likes plastic…and then Kitten walked the one piece to the bathroom, because that’s her shtick…carrying crap and depositing it in strange places. The bathroom is her place to sleep. The other piece was just left outside the plastic bag. Kitten hadn’t seen it yet. Here’s the blocks I haven’t sewn down yet…

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Weird cats. Guess they’re bored when I’m gone. Wish they’d do something like put all my clothes away. Or clean something. Maybe I should leave dusting equipment out or a toilet brush.

I had gaming last night, but I’ve been grinding my teeth all week, plus the right eyelid has started twitching…and I haven’t gotten good sleep all week, so I knew I’d probably fall asleep during the game if I didn’t work at it. So I stitched the whole time. It helped me concentrate. I should just do that. It works for staff meetings too. So there’s the warthog block…

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Awww, they’re cute. And here it is with block 1, which still needs a stitch thing in the background, but I need a white pencil, and I can’t find one to save my life. In my house, that is. Kitten? Midnight!

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It’s on my list for today.

When I got back from gaming, I made the intelligent decision NOT to sit down on the couch. I went straight to tracing…

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Even though it was like 10:30…but I got into the 400s, which means I only have about an hour and a half left…just the necks and heads…hard to believe there are about 130 pieces in there. Oh wait, the last-minute cat and teacup are also part of that.

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Yes. I stayed up well past midnight. Why does this shit surprise you? This is how I live. All those stupid ass articles about how not getting enough sleep harms your health obviously don’t understand everything that I need to get done. OR the plus of making art in my life. I WOULD have slept longer today, but some small puppy thing was offended by coyotes and neighbors and I think just daylight and life in general. Dog walks today and tomorrow…seriously. I feel bad for him when I’m this busy, but I can’t fix that shit. I’m doing my best. He needs more entertainers. I need some kid to come by and leave me alone but play with him for about an hour a day.

OK, I have seven thousand things to do this weekend. Seriously. One of them might be to find all the feminist slogan t-shirts I can afford and buy them. OK, that’s not productive. But certainly here’s what’s on the plate for today: pet store for dog food (apparently they like that shit), JoAnns hell for that white pencil (or 10 of them so I can’t lose all of them like I’ve lost the three or so that must be in this house), grading as much as I can, finish tracing the current tiny quilt, probably eat dinner and hang out and watch movies or something (I can grade and/or stitch and/or cut up Wonder Under at the same time). Tomorrow, repeat, but add more school shit and grocery shopping. Pick up my big quilt, which I can’t show you until July. Hmmm. I’ll show you details.

Probably go buy more Motrin. Headaches. Look at art deadlines and make some sort of flow chart, because I’m losing track of all of it. Start taxes. UGH. OK, also need to consider septic pump, new tires, and oil change. If we’re gonna go into the big yuck of life and home and car ownership, let’s just fucking go there. Yeah.

Now I need to add sitting on deck in lovely sun and drawing (I really don’t think I have time for that, but it sounds extraordinarily nice…more likely tomorrow, but it’s supposed to fucking rain again tomorrow). Walk dogs! Walking dogs in sun will work. And I forgot finish filling second greenery trashcan, plus cleaning up the rest of the leaves around the pool. Ha! OK. First morning cup of tea is partially ingested. I can semi-function now. It’s possible that I live by myself for a reason LOL.

*Depeche Mode, Enjoy the Silence

I Got Your Number on the Wall*

I’m unclear on how to start this morning. Maybe it’s the lack of sleep, limited caffeine intake at this point. It’s a beautiful blue-skied day, my pool has almost recovered from all the rain so far (my pool guy says my pool is the biggest challenge he’s ever had…I think that’s a good thing? He hasn’t quit yet…three of them have in the past.), I have lunch already made, the big quilt is at the photographer, the science project for my students is done and just needs to be scheduled (3 choices, 5 periods, so that’s 15 different posts). I almost feel like stuff is under control, except I’m grinding my teeth, grades are due in like a week and a half and I’m nowhere near done, and my bathroom is a mess. Better not to think about that stuff…just tackle it a bit at a time. I tackle the teeth grinding with exercise. I do love to go to the gym and to go out hiking, but it’s hard to find the time. I guess I just have to. That’s true of so much…just have to. Like your taxes. Just gotta do them (unless you’re the President, apparently).

I’m not the President. I think that’s part of the problem.

It was chilly last night. How do I know this? Well there’s an app for that. Plus the heat came on automatically awfully early. And I went outside in it. But even more importantly, I collected evidence from the multiple furry beasts around me…you can’t see the cat to my right in this photo, but she’s there. And Calli is upside down on the couch, head on my lap. Simba came up eventually, but Calli makes him nervous…

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Later, with cat on lap and Calli right next to her.

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Poor Calli…stuck with me all weekend. She loves my ex, who takes her every weekend, but he is off to Boston to visit the girlchild. So she’s sulking early…

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Actually, it’s because I made her sit in the front seat so she wouldn’t sit on my quilt in the back seat, ready for the photographer.

I really need to get some grading done today. It’s stressing me out. I have been trying to get it done in class, since my prep is eaten up by planning, but the kids don’t seem to understand that there are things they have to do each day, so I do a lot of babysitting…literally standing over a kid and saying, “Um. What are you DOING?” It doesn’t seem to help. We’ve planned this project out so there will be research time and project-making time, with regular checks to keep kids on task, but I’m sure by the end of it, all my patience reserves (do I have any of those left?) will be used up on the kids who just goof off. I’m boggled by that. My pool guy asked me what I had done in a previous life to be a 7th grade teacher…like it was a bad karma thing, punishment for a former life. Huh. I guess that’s one way to look at it. The next one should be awesome then. Full-time artist with a big studio, plenty of money, someone to clean the bathroom and help with the groceries. Man. That would be a blessing.

Still making a tree…one or two more strands in the trunk I think…that’s three there.

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And then…then I was exhausted and the thought of standing to trace Wonder Under felt like too much, but I did it anyway. Because I needed to. This quilt is important.

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I guess they all are, more or less. This is more. It’s hard to look out at exhibits I’m supposed to be working for, the ones where I can’t make it political, where I can’t just do what I want. It’s possible that I won’t be entering those shows, because I can’t draw for that right now. Because every time I look at my phone, there’s some other crazy shit happening that doesn’t make sense, things being taken away that shouldn’t even be a thing that can be removed. Oh yeah, and I’d rather have the NEA than a wall. Do I get a vote on that? Fuck no. Articles about tourism drops, about house sales possibly falling, about people being deported for stupid shit, about anti-vaxxers. If you don’t believe in vaccines, then (1) don’t vaccinate your kid, (2) don’t try to force your lack-of-evidence-based-decision on others, and (3) accept the consequences if your child develops polio. Seriously? You can make that decision, but don’t make it for the rest of us (Mr. Not-My-President). I’m confused about people’s inability to look at evidence and see answers. Blind eyes.

Ah, the frustration. So part of my Spring Break vacation is going to be drawing. A lot of drawing. Because I won’t be able to quilt on the trip…no electricity for a goodly portion of it. Plus really? I’m not hauling light tables or fabric or sewing machines. I will have hand work; I always do. But drawing. Because everything is making my head hurt.

In good news, we found 7 new Earth-sized planets…who’s ready? I feel like we could just start over there and leave the crap here.

*Tommy Tutone, 867-5309

The World’s in Trouble, There’s No Communication*

The big quilt is clean and ready for the photographer this afternoon. 168 hours. OK. So the next one will take less time, for sure (it would be hard not to, honestly). I’m crunched for time, so that’s a good thing. It also means I can’t really stop and take a breath…yet…too many deadlines still. I’m juggling as fast as I can.

So I started tracing Wonder Under for the new one last night…but before I could do that, I had to add a cat. You know, like you do.

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And then a teacup. Again. Necessary.

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Which added 28 pieces. Oh well. So be it. As you can see, when I’m under a time constraint, I still do what the drawing needs.

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THEN I started tracing. These pieces are tiny compared to the last piece. I really tried to keep detail to a minimum…

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Whatever THAT means.

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Anyway, I got about an hour and a half in, maybe 137 pieces? So I’m hoping to be done tracing by the weekend. Of course, there are no more luxurious (ha!) 3-day weekends, so I’ll have to function in sped-up time, like always. Where Sunday afternoons are just for getting my teaching act together and cooking for the week. I get so tired of being the only one in charge of cooking and shopping. Seriously. Could one of you stop by Petco this week and pick up some dog food…I think I’m gonna run out. And the car needs gas. Crap. It needs gas this morning. So I can deliver the quilt this afternoon.

Still working on the tree…one strand of thread. Yes, I know there’s still places to fill in. Be patient.

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There’s the quilt ready to sit in my dog-hair-filled car all day.

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I’m being harassed by a puppy who wants the ball thrown, but won’t bring it to me.

By the way, I bought this pattern for a uterus doll through Knot Hate Project on Ravelry. Because who can resist a uterus doll with a monster eyeball? I kinda suck at crochet, but this is worth fussing through. Plus the money goes to a good cause, Planned Parenthood. So go get one. And then help me crochet the damn thing.

OK, with that, I have to go to school and make sense of the water and carbon cycles. And photosynthesis. Not for me. For 12 year olds. I got it already.

*Joan Jett, Bad Reputation