May There Be Change and May It Be Drastic…

I want to write today, if just for me. My head is full. As are many of yours. We are all processing, many of us angry, frustrated, many of us looking for solutions, ways to support. I donated to Campaign Zero…

You should do what you’re comfortable doing. But do something. I have some reading to do, when I’m done with this and some other school stuff I need to do tonight. A little reading a day is good for you anyway. It should be about race and racism right now, I think. I tried to have a conversation with my students this morning…they ended up writing some things, but not saying much. Anything. I know if we were meeting in person, they would. But we’re not. So there’s that.

Saturday was a lot of TV noise, which eventually gets heavy and hard to watch. I hiked.

I went somewhere with big wide trails and not a lot of people.

This clears my head. Although it doesn’t really make it better.

I always tell my students that white people have messed up a lot of things in the world.

Things we had no right to do. I guess my place in all that is to keep talking to the kids.

I went to Crestridge Ecological Reserve, by the way.

It was warm. My legs felt like spaghetti. I felt off.

I did not hike fast. I just walked and looked and breathed.

Something that we don’t allow everyone to do.

I’m looking for other ways to spread my care. Someone suggested going to buy from our local shops that were broken into…I’m giving them a day or two to clean up, and then will head over there. I think my dentist is one of them. Not quite ready for that, unfortunately.

I’d like to buy some fabric, thread, or embroidery stuff from BIPOC, if someone wants to point me in the right direction. Googling for that is not effective. Although I found this and will make my way through it.

Did I mention that I totally freaked myself out on this walk because I was alone? And the crows were everywhere and circling and cawing and just being kinda nerve-wracking? I don’t like hiking alone sometimes. I get anxious.

Eventually I decided they were just enjoying the thermals and soaring all over for fun.

Intent is important.

All of our intent.

It was an OK hike. I didn’t feel well. I was freaked out. I didn’t go as far as I wanted because I was worried about my blood sugar and being alone.

So there’s that.

I did a dot on Saturday night…the crab to the left of the purple spool.

Small…

But cute. I did start Sunday’s dot, mostly finished it, but now it wants beads, so I have to deal with pulling those back out and trying to find a thread and needle that will work with beads. I was too tired last night to deal with that. I also made a mask for an art show I’m in, but I delayed the posting of the show for a week to allow space for all the protests and comments. It feels wrong to be putting up a COVID-related show today. Next Monday, I’ll feel better about it. Maybe.

Sigh. I cut some stuff out Saturday night, but work and packing up art (oh wait, I packed up art for my Patreon patrons…but forgot pictures of two of them. Oh well.). Here’s two of them.

I finished the edges and packed them up. I also repotted a bunch of succulents that were having issues. And watered things. It was a busy day.

Today too. But I did cut things out. I said that. Here they are.

I didn’t cut anything out last night. Maybe tonight? I hope so.

I still haven’t exercised today. My brain. Is fuzz.

I spend too many hours on a computer these days.

OK. Well. Decisions about tonight? It’s almost dinner time. Book? Maybe. Stitching? Definitely. At least finish a dot or something. Exercise? Hopefully. Sleep? Well I didn’t do that very well last night. I’m losing my hair and the horrific hot flashes are back, after being gone for about 9 months or so. Ugh. Plus my brain is not apparently into falling asleep. Oh yeah, got 7 hours of training to do as well before the end of the month. I went to school today to try to pack stuff up. Eh. Chaos in there. I’ll have to go back after they do the floors.

Until then, forward me places to send my thread and fabric money. I have relevant books to read. I put more on hold…they are 22 weeks out! Ah, the library. I might buy a few of them instead. Peace to all. May there be change and may it be drastic.

A Matter of Voice…

Hello America. Protests abound, and rightfully so. Those taking advantage of that to be assholes, sigh. Stop it. Here in San Diego, I see many posts for protests that are then denounced as being organized by police sympathizers and white supremacists. We are tired of being inside, of being trapped by a viral enemy that we barely know how to fight. It’s true that America didn’t like the peaceful protest of taking a knee…or not saying the pledge of allegiance (I never liked that thing)…so this seems over the top, but it’s not. A black man was killed by four police officers. We need a protest that sticks and forces change. Of course, we don’t want more to die. But we need change.

As one person in all of this, I decide what next, where do I put a small amount of money, because that’s what I have…what do I bring up in my Zoom class…it’s so hard to have a discussion online that I would totally have in a classroom, giving all my students emotional support in person. We did have a discussion of protests a few weeks ago, where we talked about author’s intent…calling protesters THUGS when they are not white Republicans with guns. Calling out how what we say colors what people think. Making them think about that. Again, hard to do without the back and forth of class discussions. My Zoom kids are quiet and sometimes respond, but mostly I wonder if they are even listening. Sometimes they type and I read it out and answer. It’s not what I’m used to, but I will decide by Monday what to say and how to say it, how to talk when they won’t talk, and some will only see it online and won’t be with me when they do. The majority of my students are in a group that is subjected to prejudice of one kind or another, whether because of race or color, or culture or religion. I’m the old white chick who stands in the middle of them and tells them how fucked up the actions and words of white people are. Sometimes in their eyes, I see I am the first white person who has called out my own race in front of them. OK. It’s about time. There should be more of that.

I also hope the protesters are staying safe from the virus. I worry that in two weeks, there will be worse consequences…and I blame those four cops for that as well. Although, these things were happening already…still…and getting them out and effecting change in the police departments, the unions and legal systems that protect them, the attitudes of some who think this is acceptable…so that is the positive play on all this. HERE IT IS. Now let’s fix it. Please. By the way, shut up, Mr. NotPresident. You’re not helping. You’re making it worse. I can’t understand how that angry little man’s heart does not just stop with all this chaos it is trying to make.

Deep breath. I had plans for today. They’re not gone…they’re just sort of messed up at the moment and I’m having a hard time focusing on them. Finishing this is first. Making an art mask is next. Wait, packing up and shipping my Patreon rewards is next. Getting my drawing cleaned up to post on Patreon. Also getting some posts prepped and maybe even done for one of my art groups. That’s all today. Also the current quilt.

I’m still cutting stuff…

A little at a time. Sometimes way too late. It’s quiet. It’s meditative. It’s not school.

This is after Thursday night (up way too late)…

This is after Friday night (too tired to stay up TOO late)…

I can see progress. It’s probably harder for you to see it. I’m cutting out backwards from how I ironed down. I know I’m working on the third figure right now…the angels are cut out and everything in the air…so not halfway. But progress. More tonight.

Dots…ever-present dots…the orange flower on blue next to the sheep.

This thing is getting full.

Less than a third left…

It’s a quiet moment (of 30 minutes to two hours) each night while I do these.

Last night is the blue dot between the sheep and the strawberry.

I had to pull out all my beads for that…

While we were gaming online too.

A little 3D pop on that. And since we were still gaming, and my friend Julie sent me a couple of light-colored dots because I wanted to do a COVID dot, I started that. Someone had objected to the cat, so they did a COVID-19 viral particle instead. So did Julie, adding sequins under the drizzle stitches. We both looked at the CDC photo of the virus and interpreted what we saw. First I had to add a dot to the 90…

And then embellished it…

Commemorating the shit we’re sitting in while stitching this.

The world is weird. I keep saying that. Except some things are the same…things that need to change.

Girlchild made donuts this week. I was craving donuts…

I’m glad she’s been able to try all these new things. Before the glaze…

The dough was very tasty…the glaze was decadent. Holy moley.

Yeah. I know she’s going home soon and we’ll be back to eating the lame-o crap we usually make. It’ll be fine! I’ll be able to make the frozen waffles and pancakes she makes. Yummy. I saved some of the recipes on Pinterest. We will survive.

I exercised almost not at all in the last three days. That has to change today. I might go to Crest…it’s wide trails and pretty safe. My succulent is flowering again!

I need more of these.

I moved this little guy because he was in the weeds, not on the milkweed.

That’s not food dude.

Kitten follows me…

She wishes I would stay in one place. She loves days like the last three when I was on a computer for just HOURS. My hands hurt, my wrists hurt. Bad seating arrangement.

Nova knows a good thing when she kneads it…

Pokey cat.

More late-night Kitten…

Look! It’s a normal pieced quilt that I made. What a concept.

Sigh. OK. A hike later, when it cools off a bit, although it’s pretty nice today. I don’t think I can get the man to go with me. Oh well. It’ll be me and my music. Before then, some art work tasks for a variety of things. Some lunch. I want to draw, but all this protest is in my head, and as a white person, I have a hard time commenting artistically on racism. It occasionally shows up, but it’s not something I feel like I have a voice for. I feel like people of color should have that voice, and then my job is to promote it, support it, and buy it when I can. Maybe I’m wrong about that. Maybe there is a way to show how I feel, which is all my quilts are ever about, without taking over the conversation. But probably not. Anyway. Watching for change. Being a part of it when I know how. Dropping my voice into it when it makes sense to do so. When it’s not drowning out those who really should have and need their voices to be heard.

All Stuff

I’m sorry my country (and the world) has not eradicated racism. I’m sorry my country can’t put the health of the many over the freedoms of the few. I’m sorry my government can’t make the best decisions for all the people, to take care of all the people. I’m sorry my students feel like they’re losing out on something by not being able to come to school in person. I’m sorry first responders are having to put their lives on the line and risk their families’ health in the process. I’m sorry we aren’t all better educated in science and humanity and kindness and equality and equity and and and. I don’t want to write about my personal struggle with fabric and school without acknowledging that there are things going on that are wrong and stupid and need fixing.

I do have personal struggles with fabric and school though. And they’re minor and first-world struggles, an artist brain thing…when the art brain thinks about racism and what to do about it, she doesn’t know where to start. So I am engrossed in the process on a COVID quilt and thinking about everything else that’s happened since I drew this. And yet, this quilt needs to be finished, so I will keep working on it. While other issues roll around in my head, waiting for processing.

I stayed up late two nights running, Tuesday night, because I just wanted to finish the ironing, to be done with it. I used 173 different fabrics in this quilt. Here they are.

It’s not super colorful, honestly…lots of browns and greens in the background. We’ll see what it looks like when it’s ironed.

The box of stuff to be cut out is chock full. It’s seemed full for a week, but more stuff kept fitting into it.

The angels were last…so now they are first.

Interesting color/fabric choices for the angels.

It’s a big pile there…I do keep the fabrics I used in the quilt out until I finish ironing the quilt together…

Actually, until I finish the quilt completely and start the next one…in case I lose a piece or need to change something…it’s easier than going through the stash again and trying to find that one piece of fabric. It took 27 hours and 52 minutes to iron all 1541 pieces down…longer than usual. I blame the pandemic fog my brain has existed in for the last two-plus months.

I had already started cutting pieces out at a meeting last week…and last night, with my brain racing, I stayed up too late to cut some more. This is about 3 1/2 hours of cutting…cut pieces on the top right, trash on the top left, what’s left in the bottom box.

It’s gonna be a while. I’m estimating 20 hours…that might be a little high, but we’ll see. But it’s easier for me to make time for the cutting…I can do it during Zoom meetings if I need/want to. I’ve been averaging about 8-12 hours of artmaking a week since school went back in session…that’s pretty normal for this time of year.

I only have three weeks of school left. Although a copyediting job will be showing up in June, so that’s more computer time. Ugh. Computers. School. Such a stressful thing. I’m extremely anxious about going back, about getting sick. I can’t afford not to go back, so there’s that. I don’t really want to be an online teacher full time, which might be another option. I’m on these Facebook teacher groups, and so many respond to people who say what I say with “so go somewhere else, teach at a charter school.” Well, thanks. I can’t afford to leave my district…I have too many years in. And the point is that we want ALL teachers and students and school staff to be safe. ALL OF US. Which is going to mean we need districts and boards of education and our god-damned government to support a safe way to do that. I’m still wading through the 50-page document my County Health Department put out with suggestions for schools. Braindead. Principal says we won’t know anything until the end of July or early August. Good to know. We go back August 19. Whatever ‘go back’ means.

So that. I walked Tuesday. No new flowers, but this is another neighbor putting succulents out for propagation. I took one of the blackish ones and strapped it to my pack…then planted it out yesterday.

Someone else put more of the agave out, so I took another baby. I know where they’ll go. But first, I need to see some new growth on them. Maybe plant them out in the fall. Yesterday I did pilates…I’m so stiff and sore. Need to do more of that. Need more time. Nothing new.

Dots! It’s the blue flowers above the magenta spool.

This was easy and cute.

An even better closeup.

And then last night, a sheep…just under the black/brown ball.

I didn’t have a sheep-colored dot, so she’s blue.

I think today we are officially at 2/3s done. It’s been interesting. Almost as interesting as Luna.

I want pets. Can you give me pets? Plus it’s hot. Sometimes when I wake up in the morning, I have one, sometimes two, sometimes three. It’s nice.

OK. Today is half over. Sort of. I mean, it’s noon, but you know I’ll be up until midnight so that’s 12 more hours, and I’ve only been up for 4 hours. I have progress reports to get done, more Office Hours, a quilt meeting, and who knows what else. I’m tired. I’m smelling donut-making (that’s exciting). I have a lot of stuff to cross off the list today, art group stuff, making stuff, work stuff, watering stuff, house stuff. All stuff. I am alive, though, and well, and so are those I love, and one of my favorite students finally showed up back to class today, and I’m so glad. So there’s that.

Not Making Sense

I’m trying to watch a video while I’m typing this, which should be interesting, if I can keep the two things separate and make any sense here. Perhaps I never make sense here. I have to say it’s not my goal, making sense. There’s a song about this. Maybe more than one. I’m watching a fabric designer explain her new line, which won’t come out until 2021 probably. I like listening to her process, and since I can’t meet people in person, this is kind of cool; all the people with daily or regular videos right now are maybe helping with sanity? Who knows.

I’m in between my morning class and science meeting and my afternoon class right now. I’ve peed the dogs and eaten my lunch and tried to figure out what I need to get done for the rest of the day. I need to add some exercise in there somewhere, but it’s starting to get warmer and that’s harder. I want to do it in the dark. There are mosquitoes though. And the dogs can’t deal with high heat. So it’s just a logistical issue. So many things are logistical issues. I forgot to assign something this morning and went to do that and it didn’t work. Three times. So I kept assigning, and then it assigned it once on two classes and three times on the other three classes, and kids are already turning it in on ALL THREE classes (of course), so my Wednesday/Thursday are going to be a self-made (well, tech had its way with me kinda) hellacious fuckbeast. Ah well. What’s new? The kids are doing yardwork for Grandpa and probably they are all infecting each other, which is annoying, but the man is also back at work, even though he’s supposed to have today off, because you know, when you’re the person in charge, you get the shit shift. Unless you’re a shitty boss; we all know about those, they give YOU the shitty shift and they barely work.

I barely see/hear from my boss these days. Which is OK, because there’s enough other stuff to make up for it. This week, we added a new program to track plus a new category of assignments, and I’m about to run screaming into oblivion, but it’s too hot out there for that, so I’m sitting here with the fan on, realizing I have 39 minutes until the next Zoom call. Today is pretty chill, actually; we’ve figured out next week’s science assignments and have the following week fleshed out a little better. Tomorrow will start the crazy race into the weekend.

So the last two days…I did finish cutting out all the Wonder Under last night for the new quilt…

Let’s see if you can tell the difference between 10 yards cut out and 11 yards…from Monday night to Tuesday night…11 1/2 hours of cutting…

Looks the same. But it’s not. Tonight I will be sorting them…or maybe even this afternoon. Hard to say what I’ll be doing after class. My brain is usually pretty fuzzy. I need to check some work, see if kids are turning things in. Set things up for tomorrow. Get my head around my existence. Persuade myself not to eat cookies (pretty easy since we don’t have any). I finished cleaning the office yesterday. All my fabric is put away except for stuff I saved for napkin-making, so I’m ready to iron to fabric. Looking forward to that.

This will be another big crazy complicated quilt…sometimes people wonder why I make them, when they never sell (too big and expensive), but these are the ones that get into lots of shows and win awards, so no, I’ll never make the money back on them, but there is a reward for me in the acknowledgement, but honestly, more so in the time and energy I put into them, that’s a good place for my brain to be, especially when things are hard or complicated, like now. Yes, they’re time-consuming, and no, they won’t sell, but they are the most ME. So I’m OK with that. I’ll get this one done and do a smaller daughter quilt or something after. Maybe. If I feel like it. There are deadlines coming up. I’m just not sure I care about them.

Still doing the dots…here’s Sunday night’s…just under the blue ball of thread…

It was a pretty simple one, even with the trellis-stitch center.

Some of them are amazingly time-consuming. This wasn’t too bad.

Then Monday night’s…just under the blue spool…

I’m getting better at bullions with Razzle, a shiny rayon bitch of a thread…

The center looks like a starfish on its way out. I think I’m on Dot 37 today? Or something. Simba was helping…

He never really helps.

What else is up? So much schoolwork. Yardwork, which brings bug bites. NOT sleep, unfortunately. These guys don’t help with that.

Here’s Kitten bringing me one of my slippers…

She’s a freak. Drops them in the hallway half the time. Every night, I round up my slippers and put them back so she can bring them back to me.

These guys are sweet until they’re not.

They get mopey when their dad is gone and sleep more.

I did walk the dogs, but a shorter walk, yesterday…only 2.3 miles. Like I said, it was hot.

No one else wanted to go…to their credit, the kids did yardwork in the sun all afternoon yesterday too and they were tired. Legit excuse. I just wanted to get out and move. Like every day. Here’s a flower I didn’t see before.

I like to look for the new things or changing things.

Also, Fantastic Fibers is all hung, although no one can go in to see it…yet…

There’s Womanscape on the left…a big complicated quilt from two summers ago that is just weirdly popular. The black and white piece is paper and ink, so not really a quilt…it is by Emily McBride, i never wanted you. On the right, before the corner, is Rachel Major’s Still Life. Just to the right of it, around the corner, is Alicia Decker’s Culture Shock and Hannah Zimmerman’s Place.

Funny, I thought it was huge until I saw it next to that black and white quilt…I need to go look online to see if I can figure out whose is what (not a quilt, see update above). Here we go…on the far left is Orb by Evian Zukas-Oguz.

Originally, this was three different drawings that ran for about 95″ horizontally…and then I pulled it apart, redrew, and added.

It’s always interesting to see what detail shots other people choose.

The show is open for a while longer…Not Open. But there.

Fun masks by Sarah Pramuk, Balaclava Tryptich…might be a little warm for Southern California right now. Pandemic fashion Winter 2020. Seriously, these are NFS because she needs them back.

OK, going to look for names on this…but class starts in 13 minutes, so…I got them! In time. So I can post this right before class starts. Wait. No. After class. My brain. Is fuzz.

The rest of today? Sort Wonder Under, exercise, start ironing to fabrics. Taco Tuesday! All good. This is the part I really like. Need to make some margaritas too. I think I have stuff for that. Maybe. We’ll see.

More OK with a Mask Than a Bra…

Now THAT’s the truth of my current situation.

There was this thing in my head last night that I was going to remember this morning to write about, but no. I was thinking, no, you’re not going to record it somewhere, because you are trying to fall asleep and you are exhausted, and it does not matter if you are exhausted, sleep will still be difficult, and I didn’t record it anywhere and now it is gone. I’m sure it was crucial to your day, to my day, to the development of the world. It probably has to do with people being stupid or making art or teaching, because that’s all I think about these days. But I got sidetracked by emails and plans and whatever my stomach is doing right now. I fed it good things last night and it liked them, but this morning it wants to talk about those things. I’m OK with it shutting up right now.

So even though no one but me was around for dinner last night, I wanted to get takeout, because I was tired and I’ve cooked a lot this week just for me and I’d like a night off, even if it’s by myself, so I picked a restaurant I’ve never been to in real life, mostly because I don’t think the man would eat there…maybe he would, minus all the green things, but that’s difficult. It’s the Garden Kitchen, which they claim is in Rolando, but that’s funny, because I used to live within a short walk of their location and it wasn’t Rolando then. The food was wonderful, even when I had to mess up the presentation by spatulaing it onto a plate (I don’t like eating out of the takeout containers) and it was still the right temperature and wonderful in taste and complicated combinations of stuff. And the old grocery store we went to was now a gym. Maybe it’s nicer to live there now, although the porn bookstore is still there, so maybe not.

The plus is that I have made stunningly awesome progress on cutting out Wonder Under, despite all the shit that’s in my brain. Although sometimes there are creatures who want to interrupt me.

She needs to pee. It’s OK. I took her out. She doesn’t ask anyone but me for some unknown reason. By the end of Friday night, which included a short gaming session to make characters and a movie, I had 5 yards of the 11 cut out.

Saturday included a quilt group meeting and some alone time at night, where I watched another movie, and I got 3 more yards cut out…

Two of them sitting here, which isn’t particularly comfortable, but works better for video meetings.

This is what 8 yards cut out looks like on the right…unless I’ve miscounted. Maybe I did 2 yards during the movie and 1 during the video meeting? I don’t know.

The trash pile is growing…

So if I’m right and there are only 3 yards left, I could do that in the next two nights, I think. I started cleaning the studio on Friday, did a little yesterday, and then gave up. I need to finish that and then sort all the Wonder Under, which will take an hour or so. By Wednesday, I’m hoping to be ironing onto fabric. Even though I won’t have background fabric until Saturday? I think I’ll be OK. At this stage, I only need the background to make sure that anything that will be showing on it will be enough of a contract to show up. This is the fun part! Although it will be long and hot, because ironing when it’s over 90 degrees is always sucky. Oh well. Making art is nice. And hopefully the kittens will stay out of here. This stage was exciting for them on the last quilt too.

I’m still stitching dots on time…Friday’s…

Is the pink dot with 4 leaflike things…

The one to the right of the pink spool. I was waiting for the right design for that shade of pink and finally got it. Generally, I just pick the next dot in the area, but sometimes color is an issue. Like with Saturday’s, the ladybug…on the far right at the bottom…

I wanted a color that contrasted with the red. So not a red dot…

The dark background is unfortunately a little TOO dark for the legs and head. Oh well. I’m not redoing anything.

Here’s the Anna Maria Horner fabrics I got for her color packages…the ones I think I will make into a different version of the naked lady Applique Stories.

We’ll see. It doesn’t have to happen right away, luckily.

Sleepy cats abound in the last two days…Nova when it’s hot…

Kitten follows me and then sleeps…during video meetings…

And movie-watching…

Sometimes they are into everything…like drawers in the coffee table. I thought she was too big for this now. Apparently not.

Sometimes they just want some love…

I will be ON you, even though you are doing something.

In food news, the girlchild is upping her cheese plate game…

And I excited the sourdough starter yesterday…

That IS exciting.

OK. It’s Sunday, which means putting a bra on for the grocery store. Oh yeah, and a mask. I’m OK with that. I’m more OK with the mask than the bra. Then a bunch of school stuff, and hopefully some exercise, because I’m feeling it, and a yard or two of cutting shit out. Plus sewing a dot. And gardening. And getting ready for another 5 days of what school looks like now. Ugh. It’s OK. We’ll make it, whatever it is. The sun is out, the flowers are growing, there’s a possibility of further-away hikes this week, and that is all good.

Ah yes. Teaching children. I remember having this conversation with my brother many years ago, although it wasn’t because he didn’t know the vocabulary.

Notice Something New…

It’s Friday. And I sold a quilt! Woo hoo! Someone from Arizona saw Desert Daughter at the Front Porch Gallery back in January some time, and recently contacted the gallery and it sold! I’m very excited…here it is with Arline Fisch’s wired art.

It’s nice to have people buying work right now…although I will turn around and pay off part of the girlchild’s college loan with it…getting close to done with that, and then all the income from these sales will go into the fund to remodel the bathrooms and kitchen, which really really really need it.

I need to make another Daughter quilt when I finish this big one, which is nicknamed Rona at the moment. I laid out all the Wonder Under I’d traced…

So that’s about 11 yards…one of them isn’t full, but the rest are. That’s a goodly amount.

I started cutting them apart Wednesday night…and luckily, the kittens weren’t interested.

Somewhere in the middle of cutting these out…well, at 1 AM that night, while I was trying to sleep, my brain started to fixate on how freakin’ big this quilt is and that there’s no way in hell I have a background big enough for this, and I don’t really want to piece it, because the quilt has so much detail on it that making the background busy is not a good plan. I hate buying fabric online in this situation because I can’t see the color properly. But one of my local quilt shops is doing one-on-one appointments. I can do that. I texted the owner and I have an appointment (with a mask and maybe gloves?) next Saturday. I need 5 yards for the background and if I’m smart, I’m going to find a couple of possible bindings and buy them too, because I’ll need a yard and a half for that. Fewer trips, better…much as I love fabric, it’s not necessary to be shopping regularly for it.

Thursday afternoon was my weekly stitch-in via Zoom. I actually did schoolwork for the first 45 minutes, but then sat there and cut out a yard of Wonder Under, yard number 2…

Not the most comfortable cutting space, but whatever…does two yards look different than one?

Hard to say…nighttime put me on the couch for yard number 3…

My hand hurts after switching to cutting, but it’s OK…only 8 yards to go…

Three yards seems to fill up the box a bit. I’ll probably get done with these sometime early next week, then sort them, clean my office, and start picking fabrics by next weekend. I’m hoping.

There’s been a ton of overwhelming work stuff going on this week, the second official week of teaching online. Wednesday and Thursday were crazy busy with work and meetings and to-do lists and texts. At some point, overwhelmed was all I felt. Today is better, but now I have to prep a ton of stuff and forms and shit for next week. I’m trying to keep Saturdays free of work, but that’s getting harder.

This was Thursday’s (? or was it Wednesday’s?) attempt to collect data from all the science assignments for all 160 kids…

There are pros to this…I remember how to be outside…although when the high 90-degree temps hit next week, I will NOT be out here.

Another pro…seeing kids in video! I totally miss this kid.

I was so happy to see her. And her happy brother.

I finished stitching the Nasty Woman cross stitch in staff meeting number 1 on Wednesday…

It’s been washed and needs to be ironed and finished into the hoop provided. Then it can go on the wall in my office under my Feminist AF hoop. Where the kids can’t see them.

I worked on this drawing a little bit during that meeting as well.

She has a head now…still not done. This is relaxing too. Seems like Calli is more relaxed than I am…

I had to go get her arthritis meds from the vet, who have a very good setup.

No interaction with other dog/cat parents. Super easy.

There’s not much on my destinations or events at the moment…

Although my phone knows when Summer Break is…it will feel much different this year.

Still sewing dots…Wednesday night was a butterfly…with the metallic thread being a pain in the ass…

Mine got all twisty and had to be stitched down.

And then last night’s…the dot wasn’t quite round, which became very apparent in the stitching…

I ripped the Palestrina knots out once, because I couldn’t get them to go down the middle…finally just left it the second time…

It’s the one on the far right…not round. Oh yeah. Oh well. Butterfly is wonky too.

OK. So what else? Girlchild is socializing with the puppy, who is kinda bitey.

All of us need a chiropractor and/or masseuse. I found an old electric massager (circa 1960-something…came with my house), but everyone is scared of it. I’m not. We also have an amazing stash of heat pads and creams for such types of pain.

This plant is in my yard. I don’t know what it is.

But it probably needs to be planted for real and not just half-assed shoved in a pot.

Speaking of that, I’ve walked three days this week, with the goal each time of noticing something new, a plant I haven’t seen or hasn’t been blooming…this was a great find…

We have agave, but not this type, so I shoved that babe in my pack.

Man that’s bright…

And this is sweet…

Gotta keep those eyeballs open…

Plus it’s good for me to get outside and moving after spending hours sitting in front of a computer.

These guys are either napping intensely or rampaging intensely.

It’s difficult to keep up.

So my goals today include trying to get all the schoolwork I can get done…done. Filling out forms, fixing typos, setting up online posts, attempting a new form of organization to support the kids (and me!). Also I need exercise today. Pilates would be a good choice. I’m also gaming tonight, but will be cutting out Wonder Under as well. Maybe I’ll draw. Maybe I’ll nap (that sounds really good at the moment…REALLY GOOD). Stay safe, stay well, buy some art, make some art, get outside if you can and just soak up some of that Vitamin D. With sunscreen. Seriously.

Weekend Requests…

Oh my. Friday is tired. Or I’m tired. Not sure which. I’m still fighting the tail end of the flu from two weeks ago…my lungs have crap in them and my sinuses are not happy. It’s not bad. It’s just annoying. Much like some of my students. Nothing is really bad…they’re just annoying. And the unit is actually rolling along pretty well, mostly because we’ve taught this many times before, so it’s comfortable. It’s not a new thing. It’s easier because of that. Which is good. We still need to figure out how to do something that needs the sun on a day it’s supposed to drop an inch of rain, but I’m sure we’ll be fine. FINE I say.

I finished grading one of the big assignments last night. Now I need to start the assessments, which just feel painful. I can’t do that this weekend, though, because it’s my birthday weekend! So we’re leaving town. We’re not going very far, but it’s far enough away from the pile of papers that I won’t be able to do anything with them. Which is OK. Probably that’s a good birthday gift. I’m OK if I’m buried next weekend in papers. It’ll be worth it.

This quilt is going slowly still, although I’ve done a lot on it this week. I keep track of my hours, so I can see a daily, weekly, and monthly hour count. I’ve been way down since November. I’m not really sure why. It feels weird though. This last week was almost a normal amount of artmaking. Anyway, I did finally finish cutting all those pieces out, 806 or so of them…

It actually only took another 25 minutes to finish them, so that was cool. Now they need to be sorted, which probably won’t happen until Sunday or Monday. I do hold onto the cut trash until the quilt is done, just in case I need a small piece of something. It’s easier than cutting a new thing sometimes. I don’t like to waste fabric, which is funny, because I have tons of it and will never run out. Some remnant of my grandmother’s Depression-era sensibilities. So next week, I should be able to start ironing it together. Sounds good!

So last night, I did a little cooking, some exercise, some grading, some reading (I love to read…wish I could do more of it)…but didn’t get around to cutting these out until after 11 PM somehow. I had to pack for this weekend too, so that took up some time. My faithful couch companion…

Who did come sleep with me last night…sometimes when it’s warm, she stays away, but it’s not warm yet. And yeah, the kittens are on the bed too, so it gets a bit crowded. When they’re full size (they’re only 6 months old), it will get worse, I think.

Yesterday’s #igquiltfest was about Quilting on the Go, I think…I often work in other places, although last year, it was all embroidery for some reason. Top left is waiting for the man’s band to go on, top right is the girlchild’s college graduation, bottom left is I think driving to Arizona? and the bottom right is the campground at Bryce Canyon National Park.

We have a trip coming up in about a month, another National Park trip. We’ve talked a little bit about what might happen with the coronavirus here in California and how that might affect us. Our plan is to go with hand sanitizer and soap (if there’s any left by then), but the other part of my plan is what am I going to stitch on during the trip? I stitch in the car, in campsites, by the campfire. I also draw most nights…which is easier than trying to stitch in the dark. But I’m not sure what I want to work on. It needs to be small and portable. We’ll see. I haven’t decided.

#Marchmeetthemaker yesterday was Close Up…which is easy…

People spend a lot of time close up on my quilts. There’s a lot of stuff going on usually. I like to fill all the spaces.

No parent meetings today, hallelujah. I’m not sure how useful one of yesterday’s was…the other one was easy peasy and successful, which is nice. It’s good when you can get a kid the help they need.

I think I need to take the big sketchbook with me this weekend. I want to sit on a deck/porch/something outside with a view and just draw. Will that be a thing? I’m not sure. I’m not totally in charge of this weekend. We’ll put in a request, eh?

I do actually miss these buttheads when we’re gone.

I know they look sweet there, but last night, one of them knocked a guitar over (loud), and the other one climbed halfway up one of my quilts (seriously?). So they got yelled at and/or frightened by loud noises. They are boisterous babies…which I’m sure we will miss at some point.

OK, school. Finish the things. All the things. Ha! So not happening. Then weekend requests: plenty of sleep. Some drawing time. Some physical outside stuff. Some relaxing. Some stitching. Some reading. Some decent food. Some quality time NOT thinking about coronavirus or Trump or the environment or stupid people or school. Aiming for that.

So Close…

I was so close to finishing the cutting-it-out phase last night. It’s hard to stop, but realizing I needed to be up early for another parent meeting persuaded me to stop…plus experience that tells me it doesn’t look like much in that top left box, but it’s probably an hour’s worth of cutting.

Which means I will finish cutting tonight, but probably not start ironing it together until next week. Just because I won’t be around.

This was the setup…there’s all the grading I did, a cat, and my boxes of pieces…

I think I did almost 2 hours of cutting last night, although it didn’t feel like it. Tonight, I need to pack for our weekend trip, make breakfasts for next week, go to Pilates, and grade the last period of the science unit. It’s a lot. I don’t actually know when we’re leaving tomorrow, so I might be able to push packing until then. We’ll see.

I did a little embroidery on this last night…

Gonna outline a heart and arteries. Probably should be using a hoop. I’ll think about it.

I took that photo because the #igquiltfest2020 prompt was Creative Hands…but then I decided to photograph hands I’d made in quilts…

Some new and some old. I make a lot of hands. I also make a lot of uteri. The #marchmeetthemaker prompt was branding…what am I known for? Missing penii. I didn’t post for that one.

OK, so I have a plan to get 14 thousand things done tonight, right?

These guys. There used to be decorative things in these openings and on that bookshelf.

Now there are cats.

I’m tired. Today will be fine. Did I mention I’m still kinda sick? Can’t kick the sinus stuff. It’s low level but annoying. And my brain wants me to be healthy when the coronavirus kicks in, right? Sheesh. I’m floored by the level of stupidity coming out of the government regarding the SCIENCE of all this. But also the mistakes we made because we don’t have scientists in charge. It makes me wonder what politicians are actually good for, if they don’t understand when they are NOT the experts and they need to call the experts in. I think the West Coast is in for a bumpy ride. Plus I gotta make some hand sanitizer that I’m not allergic to. Woo hoo! Yes, wondering what this will do to our Spring Break trip…hopefully nothing…and hoping we get a handle on it and limit the deaths. Sad for families to lose their loved ones this way…surprised my school district hasn’t already started the ‘clean the desks every day’ thing we had to do with SARS. Give it a week.

Peace out. Make art. Wash your hands.

Me. I’m the Good Cause.

I was supposed to grade this big pile of stuff I brought home, but I decided not to. I did another smaller, easier assignment. I’m OK with that. It was a long day, lots of climbing on counters (just don’t even ask…it’s for science) and meetings and then walking the dogs…wait, I liked that part…

It was raining on my way home, but stopped in time for this. I don’t mind walking in a bit of rain anyway, but the dogs were muddy enough as it was. I’m trying to break my new hiking boots in before our trip…think I’m going to have to take both pairs.

This is what grading looks like sometimes. Sleepy puppy on the left, bitey asshole trying to break into my grading bag on the right.

She likes to tear papers and bite them and eat plastic bags. All very annoying. They are kittens. They do annoying kitten things when they’re not sweetly sleeping with each other.

After all that, I just wanted to cut stuff out. For 3 1/2 hours…

So I did. No, I’m still not done. I still have the stuff in the top right box to cut out.

Maybe I will be better tonight about grading? Or not. It’s not like I didn’t grade. I just chose a simpler, quicker assignment that I didn’t actually finish because my printer is out of ink and I needed a printout to finish it. A printout I already made but left at school. Uh huh. Not on purpose. Grades are due today. I should check them and make sure they’re done. I think they are.

Anyway, a little left to do and then I can iron this beast together…but I will be gone this weekend, so that will make it a little difficult to get a lot done. It’s OK. It’s for a good cause. Me. I’m the good cause.

I’m getting into some shows…Fantastic Fibers yesterday, but also Contingent Upon at Southwestern College…

I have two pieces in this show…it’s only open Mon-Thurs, 10:30 AM-2:30 PM. The opening reception is 3/12 at 11 AM and the artists’ talk is 3/12 at noon. I won’t be at any of it, unfortunately, due to my day job. It’s up through 4/14, and I won’t even be around for my Spring Break enough to go see it. Oh well.

I also got into a book show at the downtown library. The opening is Saturday, March 14, from noon-2 PM. I will be at that one at some point, not sure when.

OK, but today it is photosynthesis day, so I am grateful for the blue skies and sun that are out today (and weren’t yesterday)…to make this lab easier. I’m wondering about next week’s sun-related lab though, since there’s rain in the forecast. We might have to adjust slightly. I remember it raining when we did it last year too, but not a lot. Just a sprinkling. No biggie. A little water won’t hurt them. The kids. Or the lab. We’ll see. First I’m going to work to find that printout. Make some attempt to be efficient.

What They Need…

Grades are done. This is good. It feels good. Ignoring the pile of crap I still have left to grade, because it is never-ending until June 17th or so. Yup. Totally ignoring that. Can’t hear it screaming from in here. I shoved some in a bag and brought it home, and then ignored it all weekend. It’ll get done. Somehow. I have four parent meetings (so far) this week. One is a legit we-gotta-fix-this meeting. Two are probably a waste of time, but we have to document stuff, although I was trying to avoid one of these with just a phone call, and that didn’t work. The kid tells one story; me another. One is interesting in that I’m not sure where the parents have been for the last 6 months of their child not succeeding, so that should be interesting.

March is always a long month for school if Spring Break starts late, which it does this year…not as late as last year, as the man tells me, as he’s checking temperatures in the national parks we’re visiting this year. I’m like, it’s a month out! It won’t be snowing then. Ha. Ha ha. Will it? It could be. Last year, they closed the road in Zion 9 days before we left, and we had to scramble to get new reservations, and it snowed in Bryce 4 days before we got there. And we survived. We spent some time (and money) at REI on Saturday and will be doing some online shopping too. I got new boots…now I need to wear them in a bit. Hopefully that will be easier than last time.

But school stretches out right now. It’s long and kids are often checked out and/or difficult…or it’s Spring and love is in the air. All in all, it’s a difficult month. We’re filling it with plants and animals and ecosystems, so hopefully it will all turn out well. Goodbye rocks! We love you, but we’re done with you for a while.

Saturday afternoon and night, I worked on the February drawing for my Patreon…it looks like I plugged Kitten in here…

She likes to lie on the cord.

A little bit of editing, cleaning up, and later…

She’s ready to post. I keep trying to schedule the drawings earlier in the month, and then I get sidetracked by life. Always.

Sunday I ran a million errands and still didn’t get everything I needed. Frustrating. I cooked and graded and then around 10 PM, I got to cut stuff out…with Simba for a bit…

He was very tired…on the other side…Kitten…

My staunch couch companion…

Still plugged in…

I feel like I’ve done a ton of the cutting, but there’s still a healthy chunk left to do in that bottom box…

Can’t quite see the bottom of the box yet. So more tonight. After walking the dogs, I hope, for the first time in a while. If all the meetings go well and I can get off campus at a reasonable hour.

I’m participating in #igquiltfest and #marchmeetthemaker on Instagram…the first day is intros.

I’m not good at the days after the first day, because they focus either on the business of making or the making of quilts in a more traditional manner, neither of which are really my thing. But I try. Plus yeah, life gets in the way. I missed an entry last week because of that. Spaced it. Oh well. I did get into Fantastic Fibers, so that’s cool…Womanscape will be traveling to Paducah to stare at the AQS headquarters with disdain. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, consider yourself lucky.

They do love each other. This was a little bitey for a bit…

But it started out with Nova cleaning Luna after Luna landed on Nova.

Here’s one of our resident hawks…

On the fence, looking for rodents. I’m OK with that. Our owl has wandered off. We miss him. Her. Whatever. IDK how to tell in the dark.

Last pic is the fabric that came in the mail this week, from Anna Maria Horner. Adding to the stash in a different vein…

Fun stuff to add into the mix. This month, the color was blue. Obviously. Certainly a wide range of types of prints.

OK, so we’re ‘planting’ (no dirt, thus fucking with their idea of what plants need) seeds today, so that should be interesting. I have learned to ignore what my first science class of the day knows or doesn’t know, because they are not indicative of the general knowledge. They are either still asleep or they were asleep all last year…or both…so I wait until the next class to evaluate what they know. It’s better that way. Two parent meetings today, and then hopefully walking dogs and cutting stuff out. Oh yeah, I’ll probably have to grade something. Sigh. Seems I spend a lot of my time (awake when I should be asleep) worrying about what things need. People, animals, papers.