Weighs on You…

Ah yes. Back to work. It’s been a weird interim. In the last two days, I’ve had the brain power to grade stuff (and input it, because my kids think nothing counts this year) and plan about 4 weeks out of 8th-grade science, which is a blessing, because I have no one to plan with at the moment except my poor overworked co-teacher who is managing all the things. So it was good to have the mental space to tear apart the existing curriculum and decide how to actually teach it. I’m curious how the other 8th-grade teacher will handle 6 pages of reading assigned as homework to our kids, but that’s something I can worry about at another time. Today, I am going back to piles of paper, shit I was supposed to do but didn’t because I wasn’t there, and kids who aren’t used to me yet, except for the ones who already had me. So yeah. Chaos. It’ll all be fine. If I can remember all of it. Spent the hour this morning after the man woke up and before I had to get up (he’s loud) trying to remember how to do the labs I’m doing next week…haven’t done them in years. I’m sure it will come back to me.

I have not been spending hours and hours making art mostly, because the day job is significantly hefty enough that even when you feel sick, it still weighs on you. I have been cutting stuff out every night, though…

Yesterday I had a couple of Zoom meetings, so I got a little more done.

I also lost a letter R in that pile of trash. Can’t find it. I really shouldn’t cut over that pile…I usually use a lid and cut into that, so there’s not a huge pile of stuff for a tiny piece to dive into and completely disappear. My fault. I’ll re-iron it tonight. I’m not going to be done cutting anytime soon…there’s a lot still there.

This was the weekend I needed to be done with this piece…completely…if I wanted to meet the deadline. Ah well. Not happening. It’s OK. It’ll get done and go somewhere. The Man has a show tomorrow (hopefully he practices better masking) and will be gone most of the day/evening, so I’ll have plenty of time to cut stuff out and maybe get it sorted. We’ll see.

Simba likes a morning lie-in on the deck before the sun hits it.

And Nova just likes lying on chairs…

At least I only have to go in for one day…it’ll be fine. Next week will be a bigger challenge…everyone else has had a week plus to adjust…I feel a little off on procedures and stuff, but I’ll figure it out. Also have a weekend to remember what exercise is, maybe go for a hike, do some pilates. That would be nice.

Losing Track…

I keep losing track of what day it is. The plus is that as of yesterday, I feel really good. Mostly well. Still a bit rough on the physical exertion and the phlegm isn’t quite gone, but no more weird spacy things going on with the head and brain. I read yesterday! ‘Twas lovely. I also finished the ironing yesterday…I did a little on Monday night…

Some hair and the other faces…

And then yesterday, I finished…22 1/2 hours total. Some of them pretty spacy…

I forgot to count how many fabrics…150. Exactly. Wild. Not supremely colorful when you look at the pull. Lots of flesh tones and earth tones. We’ll see what that looks like in real life, once it’s ironed together.

I continued cutting pieces out last night…here’s the pile before I started…

And after an hour or two…

There’s plenty left to cut out. I’ll do some of that today. So far, though, I’ve been working…school stuff and some art stuff. Saw the boychild…he starts CalFire for real (woohoo!) on Monday. He confirmed that I don’t know what day it is. I still need to write sub plans for tomorrow, grade some more stuff, set up my gradebook, figure some 8th-grade shit out (ugh), and finish my book. Crucial that.

So Kitten was stalking this poor baby in the pile of shoes by the back door…

It might be the same one as last night…it might not…because I just saw another one in the laundry room. It ran off before I could rehome it. Kitten likes to steal their tails. I told her it wasn’t nice. She doesn’t listen.

I’m sure I’ll be back at school at some point. Not sure when. Worst case…Monday. Or best case…depending on how you look at it. Might go make some peach cobbler right now.

Headbanger…

Oh hey. I think I need to lie down while I’m writing this. Let me pop the pictures in and then head for the couch with the iPad.

Yeah I am definitely better…and then I’m not. Yesterday afternoon, I felt almost normal, same when I woke up this morning. Now I’m fighting (or succumbing to) a rancid headache. So back to the couch. Back to lying down. Back to not reading because the words get all tumbly. Hmmm.

Friday was ok. Not great. But I could cut stuff out and binge watch the telly by the evening.

I did quite well for an invalid.

Saturday was all cutting. Watched Shining Vale and The Bear. Much better than the Man’s binge-watching choices.

And holey moley, although Sunday morning required a nap while thinking oh so hard about the grocery list, I almost felt normal in the afternoon…completed tasks AND stood to iron for an hour or so. Such joy.

No such joy today. Head is wobbly, feel blah, need to eat, want to read or work or something, but head. Is. Ache. Also I may have over-ordered tests from the government. I started testing for school yesterday. Still positive. Also probably still incapable of actually functioning well enough to go back.

Meanwhile I did manage watering the plants yesterday…swallowtail caterpillars are back.

Last night, this baby gecko was on the ceiling in the studio. I lost sight of it. So it’s still in there somewhere.

I read some before the headache started up again. This amused me.

Ok that’s all I got. Maybe should eat something besides applesauce. Hoping for a few hours of functional tonight? I’m supposed to cook, so that would be helpful. The Man is back at work, so that’s good. I will be too…eventually. Until then…naps and forgetfulness.

Finally Felt…

I’ve been copyediting all week; I finished yesterday. I also finally felt like I was on break last night. Finally felt like I might have had a decent amount of sleep (until I stayed up too late last night and was still awakened by the world this morning…although hallelujah, I think the neighbors are done giving swimming lessons to everyone and their mother…BUBBLES! YAY!). Finally felt like everything wasn’t hanging over me. Well, that was temporary. I looked at my to-do list briefly this morning and there are still a million things on it. As always. Finally felt like I could do something besides work.

I finished ironing everything on the current quilt to fabric Wednesday night…just short of 22 hours to pick fabrics for 1100 or so pieces. Not fast at all. Fucking slow as hell.

But here’s part of the why…

171 different fabrics. I’m not sure why, but I needed a ton of different fabrics to make this quilt. Lots of fussy little vignettes in it, I think. Not sure. But that’s a lot of fabrics for only 1100 pieces. I know. I said ‘only’, but I’ve made quilts with lots more. It seems like there are certain things that up the time: lots of little tiny pieces, lots of fabrics, lots of differently colored things going on. Yeah. Well.

I started cutting pieces out a week ago…and then last night, I did about 3 hours of it…

And got really close to done. You can see the bottom of the box there, but there are still a lot of pieces left. At least an hour’s worth…I’ve been trimming for 11 1/2 hours, so that’s not bad. I leave some of the tiny pieces for later. But I’m hoping to be done today with this part, then sorting, and start ironing together this weekend.

I’ve also been trying to finish some stuff from the last three years…just get them done and on Etsy, where they will languish forever because it took too much time to make them so they are too expensive for anyone to buy. Ah well. I cleaned up, ironed, trimmed, and found backings for two of them, found canvases that should be the right size (knock on wood) for two of them to be mounted on, and cut strips for another one, so hopefully I can put it in a hoop.

So I’m hoping to do the sewing for those today and get them closer to done and photographed, so I can put them all in a bag somewhere out of my studio. One of my summer goals is to clean up around the computer in here (it’s my annual summer goal, and I do it every year, and then school happens and things get out of control again)…and these were just lying around, so they’re getting done. I haven’t even started the getting done of things that I’m supposed to be doing for my quilt guild challenge. Borders on the alien bed quilt next, so I can quilt it at my mom’s. Plus two wool quilts that need quilting.

Also need to get this current quilt done and on to the next one, although I can’t keep up with the evil shit the Supreme Court keeps doing, so I need to do a Roe v Wade quilt, a teacher prays but only if they’re Christian quilt, and a climate change quilt. Again. Not to mention LGBTQ rights and anti-female sentiment and and and…sigh.

Kitten has decided that this bag of science books from my co-teacher is her favorite in the whole world…

I’m not sure I will ever get that bag back from her.

Simba says hi…

He’s glad it’s a little cooler today.

And this cat…Nova…really needed my love and attention last night despite my trying to cut things out…

This is why I’m always covered in fur. I stopped and petted her for a while and then she let me cut things again.

Meanwhile, my neighbors are having a tree removed today. Is that better than swim lessons on the other side? Or jackhammering in the back corner? I don’t know. I think I’ll be OK if I turn some sound on…music or Netflix or anything but power tools and small children. Also I think I need to make a cloth cover for the part of the desk in front of my keyboard because my arms don’t like the wood when it’s hot out. IDK why. I’m currently putting two napkins on the desk instead of sticking to the wood all day. Also maybe should walk away from the computer. Copyediting for 7 days straight does this to my brain.

Happy July y’all. It’s officially the only full month I have off from school. So I have jury duty. Yeah. Thanks. I am going to enjoy all the fabric stuff I do today though…in between gardening stuff and maybe a trip to the gym. But lots of fabric.

A Place in the World

Still here, still trying to find a place in the world. I realize for many that the US has never had a place for them. As an educated white female, I always had a place…not a great one, not an equal one, but better than many. We were never 1st-class citizens. And now it is worse. Depressing and worse.

What do we do? Ah well, that is always the question…

There’s that. There’s making art, donating money (when I have it, which isn’t now), writing postcards, protests…

When I can handle them, marches, figuring out how to get rid of half the Supreme Court without violence, voting, persuading others to vote. Sigh. I remember in college locking arms with others in front of women’s health clinics to keep the anti-abortionists from harassing women coming into the clinics. It was the era of bombing clinics, but no part of me considered that. Youth. But I did think about that when I was at the vigil on Friday night. People will die. Many of them will be women who aren’t allowed to get healthcare they need or who find it unsafely, illegally. Women will die. For this shit. Ignorance. Unscientific ignorance.

Still processing all of that.

Meanwhile, there was an artist event at the California Fibers’ show at Visions this weekend. I’ll post more about that on their website and link it here later this week.

They all had better clothes than me…not hard really.

The show is up through July 2…you should go check it out. It’s a wide variety of textile art.

I’m still ironing stuff down and cutting things out…

I’m getting close to done with the ironing…

I’m almost done with the 800s, so maybe 250 pieces left? Or less?

Nowhere near done with the cutting out unfortunately. Getting there. Although now this competes with copyediting, which started Friday and will hopefully be done this week. After this morning’s science meeting. I take breaks in between copyediting to go beat my yard or house into submission. Copyediting means I must be supervised…

She’s not very helpful.

I am trying to finish up some embroideries/small quilts to put on Etsy. I got these done on Thursday…

I’ll let you know when I’ve had time to put them on Etsy…

I might rephotograph too…ugh…

I know I’m trying to do too much. That is always the case though.

Oh yeah, baby owl…see the little white bit in the hole? That’s one of the babies!

That’s the best photo I’ve gotten, though. They hide when I come up further into the yard. Getting brave though!

OK. Science meeting, then copyedit, then more yardwork. Finish my book before it’s sent back to the library. Try not to burn down the country while I’m at it. Huh. Maybe.

Our Revised Existence…

Congratulations America…you’ve just hopped viciously backward fifty years or more. You’ve just confirmed that it’s OK to buy guns to kill a bunch of kids in an elementary school, but women can’t have bodily autonomy. It makes me sick to my stomach. Don’t tell me to go live somewhere else. I was born here. In a military hospital no less. This is my country as much as it is yours.

If you voted for these people who believe this is their right, to take away the rights of half the population, then I cannot talk to you right now. I can’t talk about this without angry crying. In fact, I just walked away from the computer for a while there to let it settle a bit.

I have typed about 17 things here and deleted them. They don’t help except to push some of the anger out of me onto you. I did not ever think that at 55 years old, I would be hoping that sometime in the future, women might get rights back over their own bodies. And to those who told me it would never happen (rich white males, as it happens)? Fuck you. Even if you voted for our rights, you gaslit me and others who saw this coming. This has been 10 years coming, maybe more.

Fuck fuck fuck. My daughter. My friends’ daughters. My students. My students’ daughters. Abortions will still happen…they will just be unsafe. Trans rights. Gay rights. Damn them for interfering where they know nothing. Women who need abortions for health reasons or due to rape or incest? Fuck the Republican Party for this.

Moment of silence. Trying to reorder my thoughts. Trying to figure out what I can do. Besides make art about it. It seems like that’s all I can ever do. It doesn’t seem like enough.

Moment of silence.

Moment…

I have a science prep meeting today. I’m so not in the mood.

Reorder thoughts.

I’ve been ironing. I literally just ironed this down the other night…

And started cutting it out last night. I cut the robe fabrics out…I remember those shapes. I cut his head out…you can see the robe pieces there, all black, on the top left.

SIGH. Reorder thoughts. I spent a lot of time artmaking yesterday, possibly too much when I look at the to-do list. I did ship a quilt. I finished three pieces that will go on Etsy in the next few days. I set up a sale page for my blog to put a few older pieces on sale. It’s not up yet. I’ll tell you when it is. I ironed more flesh yesterday just to clear the ironing board so I could iron the quilt that needed to be shipped.

I only had long strips of this fabric…not sure where it came from…maybe Kris? It’s not the normal half yards I buy.

This is where I had gotten the night before.

I finally hit the halfway mark…I’m in the 600s. It feels hard to be making art right now. Like it won’t matter. Today I start copyediting, so I can pay the summer bills. Because I’m a white teacher who has access to good healthcare and was given a good education so I could have a decent job (don’t get me wrong…teachers are not paid enough for the hours we put in) and not everyone has that privilege. So I have the ability to spend time drawing and cutting up fabric so I can sew it back together.

SIGH.

Kitten surveying the outdoors. Hanging out with me.

I hear petting animals is good for the brain…

The Man is doing a good job of that. Boychild is back from the fire. Pretty dirty. I need to go to school and work right now. Then come back and copyedit, then more art. Get my head around our revised existence.

Give Us What We Need…

We are definitely getting near the end of this school year. My body and brain both agree. My inability to sleep at night does not help. Ugh. I wake up in the morning not sure what day it is (IDK what’s up with that…I am constantly staring at calendars…I should always know what day it is). I am exhausted. I’m also sore and rocking a sore throat constantly from talking with a mask on…but if I take it off, I’ll be out for 10 days with COVID like half the teachers on campus have been. That would get me out of the last two weeks of school, yes, but that’s not fair to the kids trying to finish art projects or the teacher who would have to come in and sub and NOT teach sex ed (IDK what I would give the kids, but not that). This year just needs to be done. I’m picking fights with the district office (they don’t give us what we need…I’m so tired of that) and other departments over legit stuff, but it makes me feel bad sometimes to ask for what I need. For what we need. Wonder of being a department co-chair plus a union rep. Just give us what we need to do this job, dammit. It’s hard enough anyways, and then to be like “oh that’s not possible…”. Aargh.

Bitch. That’s what they call me. I know that. I’m just tired of not getting what we need. Of ignoring what we need.

Somehow this week I need to figure out how to get two programs on two kids’ computers. I just need someone techy to do it for me, but no. If it’s going to get done, I will have to do it.

Sigh. Yeah. Done.

Also need someone to deliver food every day and not be expensive. And the pool guy to figure out what’s up with the damn pump without my telling him to. And for my insurance to send that damn letter without my having to call again. Sigh.

OK. Well. In good news, I finished tracing all the Wonder Under on Friday night…

6 yards and a bit…then started cutting on Saturday night…

And a little more on Sunday night…

Next step…seeing progress. I will hopefully be done with this by the weekend, and whatever time I don’t spend grading will be spent ironing. But I don’t have a background. Ah. Well. Will need to think upon that.

I also gave a talk Saturday at my quilt guild…took some quilts and my sketchbooks and explained stuff. Maybe. And then worked on this…

The neverending scarf.

I also hiked on Saturday…

Went out to Crestridge Ecological Reserve…it was warm but beautiful…

I got lost a bit on an overgrown trail, but found my way out eventually…

Hiking alone sometimes freaks me out, but not enough to stop. I just needed to get outside and walk for a while. It was good.

The Man took a few days off but is now back on trail…

He was here last night…weird-looking area…

He’s not feeling well this morning again. Not sure if elevation is just really kicking his butt or what, but he’s not giving up. Still moving. It’s hard. It’s hard for him and for me…different kinds of hard. Some 20-year-old died of elevation sickness a week ago, so now we’re all paranoid. Hopefully he will feel better soon…since his doesn’t sound like elevation stuff. Just being-on-trail stuff.

Here’s Luna, being her psychotic self…

She misses her dad, but I am an acceptable substitute. Apparently. For both the cats.

UGH. OK. I really need to go to school. Luckily it’s pregnancy video day, so all I have to do is listen to the squawking of 12-year-olds complaining about childbirth being so gross. Actually, I think all the childbirths will be tomorrow…short periods today. Well that’s a plus. Maybe I can get some work done. Maybe I will actually have my prep period today, unlike Friday.

I think what I really need is two weeks of uninterrupted sleeping in and lots of drawing and reading my book. And then maybe I can deal with humanity again. Soon. Maybe.

Unfunded…

I’m at that stage of the school year where every morning is exhaustion. Friday was fun with microscopes, but a lot of running around and then trying to get kids focused, then some adult drama that I could do without. This week has some ups and downs for what we’re teaching…today and tomorrow will be a bit of a slog, no matter what I do to prepare them (and me). But I did everything I could this weekend to be ready for it.

I also did a lot of art, which was nice. I even took a class in something I never would have done if my guild weren’t doing it. So that was good. It’s always good to stretch a little to see if something new will work.

So the current quilt…Friday night, so close to done (not really…there are a lot of pieces left in there…they’re just small)…

Saturday night we went to an art opening and got freaked out by small space, lots of people, but then came home and watched a movie and I cut out the rest…

That’s 21 hours and 21 minutes of cutting. Very precise. You want to know how I price my quilts? By my time.

It wasn’t too late yet, so I sorted them too…

So many tiny pieces. You can see the 400s box has most of the big sky pieces in it. Everything else is small as fuck. I know, I know…I designed the thing. I’m the one who is also hoping it’s done in time, but who the hell knows.

And then last night, I started ironing it together…

Somehow I lost a bunch of tree parts already. They could be in the couch, they could never have been cut out (I found one in the pile of trash I save for just these reasons). Who the fuck knows. I don’t. Kept ironing though…

I’m 150 pieces (approximately) in. My goal this week is to get it ironed. Of course, my schedule and exhaustion levels might not help with that. Plus that grading thing. Whatever. Those tiny animals though…they are a time-consuming thing. I have a tortoise and an owl to do tonight. I’m looking forward to seeing how it all looks though…I never see it in full color until it’s ironed, except in my head.

The class I took was on Zoom with David Owen HastingsInspired by Architecture. I borrowed pictures from the girlchild’s travels, although she’ll be hard-pressed to tell what photo I used.

I could make all of those, but I probably won’t. I cut out the pieces for another one…not one of these…it’s somewhere else. In a pile.

David was a great teacher, lots of info, nicely timed, feel good about the process, although it is incredibly outside of my wheelhouse.

I couldn’t help but put some hand-stitching in there. I’m not sure modern is my thing, but it was an interesting class. Certainly this was faster than my normal process.

I was hoping an art reset would help with this week. Maybe it will. I know I came home Friday night incredibly stressed and overwhelmed. I finished grading one thing that might help with the mindset…although there are other things coming to take its place. One of the issues was my septic. The pumpout this year went fine, but my tank is old and there were some issues…the issues started at being around $1200, and now are a partial rebuild…so 5 times that.

I guess it’s a good thing I sold two quilts…I can pay for this and probably my taxes and maybe my property taxes, maybe? But the summer is now unfunded. That’s really how teachers look at summer sometimes…unfunded.

So there’s a bit of panic in my head. I’ll get through. Just unexpected.

Part of trying to reset my mind was cleaning my studio up for yesterday’s class. I had pieced three of these, so I did the other three.

This is from the Molli Sparkles Cut It Up Quilt-Along. I’m way behind, but that’s OK, because it’s just a fun thing I’m doing. When you make the corner pieces, there are leftover triangles. I hate to waste, so I pieced them all…

I’ll trim them up and put them in the quilt somewhere. You can see that mostly I was doing complementary colors: blue/orange, red/green, purple/yellow. Guess that art degree paid off.

Ah yes, well school starts soon. Back to the chaos. And it’s a hot week, so hopefully they can finally get my A/C really running, instead of ignoring actual class temperatures and going on after school is out. Somewhat frustrating. Three more weeks until Spring Break. It also means I think I only have three weeks to finish this quilt. That could be problematic. Ah well…if I don’t finish for one deadline, it will go to another show, won’t it? Yeah. It will. I am frustrated by my inability to get art done this year (and last year…see the pattern?). My day job is taking too much time. More than usual. Sigh. OK. Well. Tonight I dedicate time for art. Hopefully.

Miracles…

‘Tis a miracle, my loves. We have almost reached the weekend…although at the moment, weekends are fraught with chores and paying bills and catching up on the shit I couldn’t get done during the week. Plus I thought taking a Zoom workshop for 6 hours on Sunday sounded good, so now everything has to get done before then. Hmmm. Maybe not the best choice. Certainly that was behind my thinking as I stayed at school until 6 PM last night copying stuff for the next two weeks because (a) there was actually paper in the copier, (b) there was no one else there, and (c) now I have a “free” prep (full of grading and/or until someone plops something on their to-do list into my time, which happens on the daily). So yeah. Tonight will be working and finding things for the workshop and filling out an exhibit entry form to make up for the reject earlier this week and then writing a script for 6+ minutes of talking. Don’t get me wrong, I can do the talking, no problem, but not when it’s timed and related to photos, which also, I have to find. By tomorrow. Tomorrow goes until midnight, my time, I’m sure.

But it is a Friday and that means we have survived (knock on wood, we have today to get through) another week before Spring Break comes along and gives us a much-needed break.

I persevere with the cutting…this is Wednesday night during book club…

I graded two weeks’ worth of homework before I started cutting. And I did a little after book club too.

Then last night, I had major internet issues and a quilt Zoom call, but I managed to get some time in…

I know there are hours left to cut out in that top box, but I see progress here. Maybe a light at the end of the cutting tunnel? Hard to say. There will be more tonight and tomorrow night.

Someone posted a picture of my quilt Swallow Me Whole at the Excellence in Quilts exhibit, currently at the Virginia Quilt Museum in Harrisonburg.

It’s there through April 9…cool to see it. I wasn’t expecting to get into this show because they had size restrictions and mine was completely and totally outside of them. But there she is.

OK, I might actually FINALLY be getting my septic fixed. First guy flaked, second guy thinks he can do it today, but IDK how much this will cost. Ugh. Stomach roiling over that. I know what it should cost for the first part, but the second part might be an issue. OK though, it needs to be done.

Off to school. Microscopes today. Could be exhausting. What’s new? Not much. I’m going to try to fit in a walk this afternoon after work. I need some physical exertion to deal with the stress. Maybe LOTS of physical exertion. Hmm.

No Nap…

Hey. So I need a nap. It’s morning, it’s 7 AM even, but I already need a nap. I fell asleep worrying about school after grading an assignment that made me rethink my career choices. It shouldn’t have. It’s a relatively easy assignment, and my other three science classes did pretty well on it, but this one class? Was I on crack when I taught them this stuff? Or was I asleep? Because they didn’t apparently get the same lesson everyone else did.

Except they did. I taught all of them the same day and this was the last of the four, so it should have been the most refined teaching of the day for science. So. Not me. Except, I’m a teacher, so we always think it’s us. I seriously half-cried when I got to the third kid (three in a row with zero understanding of the assignment, incredibly off topic). I eventually got to some kids who reaffirmed my faith in humanity and my own teaching (yikes!). So then in the shower this morning, I practiced the conversation in my head that I will have with them this morning. I already know that what I have to teach them today is difficult and requires multiple brain breaks, because I taught it three times yesterday and it was fucking hard. Not because the topic is hard…it’s not THAT hard. It’s just been warm, my A/C refuses to come on, the kids come to me hot from PE, and their brains are only just barely working on school at the moment anyway. It was a painful slog. It will be cooler this morning, so hopefully that will help with this challenged bunch.

I often have Nova overseeing (literally) my grading…

Meanwhile, I haven’t gotten much art stuff done. I managed a little more than an hour of cutting things out on Monday night…

Kitten is absolutely no help. She wants to sit in the fabric boxes but knows she’s not supposed to. So then she headbutts me until I pet her. Sometimes she’ll settle right there and sometimes she leaves.

Last night, I got home from work and went to the gym (good!), came back and started grading that hellacious class, questioned my career choices, almost cried, ate my dinner, finished grading that class, and finally started cutting. At 10 PM. There’s some people who think I’m always too busy to see them because I’m making art…I’m only making art after 9 PM, y’all. It’s the day job that takes up such a huge chunk of time. Even my phone thought I should’ve started earlier…

You’re right, phone. Usually I would have started around 9:30 PM. So it was a shitty night for cutting things out. Hopefully tonight will be better. I have book club on Zoom. I’d prefer it in person, because I need some time and space with humans in person who actually listen to me and don’t stare off into space and then say, “I don’t understand!” at the top of their lungs because they haven’t been listening. I will not be getting any of that this week except maybe at lunch. Maybe. Not even dinner tonight or tomorrow night. Zooms. It’s OK. I’m having a rough time of it, but it will get better…or it will be Spring Break. Either way, I’ll survive.

I cut things out for about 21 minutes last night before bedtime.

I see progress, but it’s slow. I cut out those long skinny cactus last night. That’s it. That’s all I did. I hope I do more tonight, or this quilt will never get done. I also need to enter another show (to make up for the one that rejected me yesterday…it’s OK…rejections are normal) and do my photos and script for the lightning talk for SAQA. I need the mind/headspace to do that one. I think I might have that on Friday? At the earliest? Let’s not think about the fact that it’s due Saturday. It’ll be fine.

Today? This morning, I have a parent meeting, then I teach that class that will torture me, then art, talking about idioms today, then the second part of science, which should be more fun and/or easier than yesterday. I hope. Then a lot of grading during prep period. Then exercise, book club, cutting things out. SLEEP. See, no nap. Hmmm. Must be doing things wrong.