Earth Is in Retrograde

OK, maybe just the US. Maybe the rest of you are okey dokey. If so, send snacks…and help.

I don ‘t feel ready for the day. It’s too early. There are too many meetings. I wrote 7 emails in Spanish yesterday. I talked to a kid using Google Translate. Imma do that today with another kid, if she actually shows up. Sigh. When I care more about a kid promoting to high school than their parents do…then I know their parents have way more on their plates than I do, and that’s saying something. School is a challenge. It’s always a challenge. It’s hard because we’re redoing a unit for the fourth time (for me), and we’re using ChatGPT, but (1) it uses natural resources, which bugs me, and (2) it’s not particularly smart or helpful sometimes.

Sigh. I know it. And I guess I’m not using it to write this (as if you couldn’t tell…I ramble worse than a baby lamb). My school district is really pushing it. At some point, maybe with a different government in place, there will be limits…but not for a while. Not until the damage is done.

Time is difficult too. I had a meeting before and after school yesterday, and before I went to the afterschool one, I drove out into this…

Which could have been way worse (I was on the freeway that isn’t all yellow and red). And after that, I went to an opening at Hyde Gallery, which was cool. More about that later this week. Pro: the quilt is being photographed and I did the other things. I even came back (and collapsed for about 30 minutes) and got work done. I sort of set up a worksheet I need for next Tuesday (sheesh) and then started grading stuff. Always behind on that. Significantly so at the moment. That said, building roller coasters has been relatively good, except for some minor stupidity (ah, middle-school boys…operating without a frontal lobe). I got a little grading done even, which rarely happens (and won’t today, I suspect).

Ceramics update: I went on Monday, despite the two-hour staff meeting before it, and amazingly, the woman in charge was there and all the kilns were empty, and the upper torso had NOTHING BROKEN (OMG, this never happens), so it must have been fate, so we loaded it in.

I also refired the base because it needed some refinement on the underglazes. Understand that it’s probably $75 of firing fees right there, but I don’t feel bad, because I haven’t fired anything since like March. I’ve been working on the upper torso since fucking January 8. It’s about time I fired the fucker. And it survived! IDK if there are cracks, but it came out of the kiln last night; I saw it in the video. So I might go see it tonight. Maybe. Then I have to make decisions about glazing it. I’m conflicted on that. So many of the underglazes go super dark, so I’d have to put something on them. But I might want to do some iron oxide as well? Not sure. Might have to sit on that decision for a while.

Meanwhile, the head is done and drying…

And in photos…

In case your video is annoying.

I did go a little weird on the head. And yes, I had to make a base and will fire it in the base. And then throw the base away. It’s OK; it’s reclaimed clay.

And then I worked on the very top bit, the tree on the top…

I wrapped it up with like 20 paper towels, hoping it would hold up as it dried, and not dry too fast.

Pain in the ass. Seriously. Why do I build this crazy shit? So this comes out the top of the head. Wish me luck.

In between that and packing up two quilts for the photographer, and driving all over town, I managed to tape two big pieces of paper together on Monday night and start drawing last night. The taping and drawing was complicated by this standoff.

Bowie wanted to play and Nova decidedly did not. But eventually they left, and I started with one of the campfire sketches (I’m changing it a bit as I go)…

There’s a little pencil on there, just to make sure stuff isn’t a stupid size. I can’t make it too complicated or I won’t be able to finish it in time. Bathtubs (yes, there will be more than one) and politics. Perfect mix. I’ll be doing this for a while. Hopefully not more than a week, but you never know.

From the book I just finished…which was eh.

But I liked some of her sentences. Like that one.

This is probably relevant to my quilts…because people sometimes say that to me about my work.

Make the world a better place and I’ll make prettier quilts. Also this…Goodall didn’t mention me at all. And I’m OK with that.

So the barn owl is still here, shitting all over the entryway steps and shrieking occasionally. I accept that as part of the wonder of having barn owls. I also accept the dead gopher they dropped in the driveway. But now we have romantic Great Horned owls…this is one of the males.

Horrible picture, at night, with a flashlight aimed at its horny self.

Not that the video is any better. At least they’re quieter than baby barn owls. But the female…holy crap, the most scary noise you’ve heard. I don’t have video of that. So there are two males and the one female, and the other night, they would not shut the fuck up. IDK how gentle hoots can keep me awake, but I guess it says something about me.

Last meme…

I blame my feeligs on the US actually. Well, and Russia and Israel and a few others. And billionaires. And people with no empathy. So there’s that. Earth does seem to be in retrograde though.

Meeting this morning, another after school. Last day to build roller coasters, so lots of yelling and ‘get on with it’ and recording videos of successful runs. Then two days to shut up and get the rest of it done. Ha! While I try to catch up on grading AND plan the next unit with my coteacher. Fun times. Long day. No pilates; couldn’t get into the class. Sigh. Ah well. Maybe on the weekend. Things my body appreciates…exercise, reading, peace and quiet, nature. Some of that.

A Great Week

Yean, school was hard. Yeah, I’m buried in grading. Yes, yes, I’m tired. YES, I even got a rejection notice this week, but hey, ya ya, I got into a residency I really wanted and I finished (and sold) a quilt. It feels good.

Video of me trying to get Nova off the quilt last night so I could finish stitching the sleeves on…

The actual quilt finished (not the official photos…gotta get it to the photographer for that).

Feels good. Looks good. Needs a title. I’m camping this weekend, so I’ll have brain space to figure that out. Plus a statement. It was hard to make. This kind of quilt always is, but I put space and the planets in there for headspace (ha!) plus protecting all the peoples. Keep doing that. All of us.

What’s next? I need to make a larger piece for a dual show in Virginia opening in January. It’s bathtubs. Don’t ask. You’ll see. It will still have politics. How can it not at the moment?

I also finished my book this morning…20 minutes left.

Fuck Greg seriously. I started another one. I’m supposed to be packing for camping (I’ve been doing that in between all the other shit). We leave after lunch. Aack. I have so much to do, I’m having a hard time breathing. It’s fine.

Aargh. And this.

White boys. They don’t listen. Some do. Lots don’t.

If you don’t understand the 6-7 reference, consider yourself lucky (and not a teacher at the moment.

The boychild is taking amazing nature photos…he’s in Montana at the moment. This is gorgeous…

Glacier National Park. One more thing on my list of places to go.

OK, but right now, I need to pick up something and then come back and cook chicken for tonight’s dinner and pack all the things and then get in the car and head to nature. And draw some more! And bask in the not-here-ness (because so many things need to be done here). And enjoy the great art stuff.

Another Hole in My Finger…

No matter what I do, I’m always sitting on the couch on Sunday night, wondering why I didn’t get more done over the weekend. Like I shouldn’t have gone to ceramics yesterday, despite not being able to get there all week, because I should have graded more. I should have finished that one assignment (I have a class and a half left to grade…at least an hour, probably closer to two). I should have finished grading the homework from two weeks ago (I have two classes left, maybe three? Can’t remember). I’m two weeks behind in grading advisory assignments. Ah well. And I’m going camping this coming weekend, so I won’t be grading then. Unless I can get the Man to drive (then I might get sick…hmmm) so I can grade homework on the way up. Meanwhile, I’m trying to not waste my ceramics studio membership by not going, I haven’t made it to the gym in weeks, and I have a quilt I’m trying to finish so I can start the one that has to be done by mid-December. Minor panic. I did manage to pick a binding from the three and get it sewn on…

Although Friday night, all I did was trim it. It was all I could handle. I graded a lot Friday night. On Saturday, I had more mental energy…so I got the binding sewn on and pinned down, and found a cat to sit on it.

Thank you, Nova. Then last night, I started the stitching and ritual poking a hole in my finger until I give in and find the sticky thimble things.

So I’ll be here a few more nights, then contact the photographer, and start the next one, which has been simmering on the Art Brain stove for a few weeks.

Ceramics has been frustrating lately; I can’t get there (I don’t have the energy or the time) and then when I get there, someone has bumped the big piece shoving stuff next to it, and it’s broken again. This is the head, though…and it’s almost underglazed…

Still some work to do on the hair…

And I think I did the teeth too? Maybe? I can’t remember when I took the photo. The mid-torso piece is hopefully ready to bisque fire, but that takes coordination with the person in charge of the kilns, and I haven’t been able to show up during her work time for weeks. I could just text her, I guess. I’m hesitant to commit to putting it into the kiln. I’m afraid it’s all going to fall apart, honestly, and if it does, I’m gluing it all together. There is a piece that goes on top of this, and the base needs to be bisque fired again, so there’s a lot going on…I just haven’t been able to get there enough.

When we go out on Saturdays, I draw until they bring us the food. I don’t always get much time (some places are super fast).

But it helps my drawing hand remember the things.

And sometimes people comment…this one got some random guy telling me it was good. Thanks random guy.

This one was two restaurants, two date nights.

The first one served way too fast.

This one too.

But it seemed mostly finished.

And yet, here is what I get from students…

I could just about read his writing. There were a couple that I really couldn’t read. This is the con to putting stuff on paper. The pro is that they can’t copy and paste from Google. The con is my brain explodes. This is what I didn’t finish. It’s not hard to grade, really…just time-consuming. What is that, you say? A person falling out of a moving car. If you stare at it long enough, you might see it. I only know that because the horrendously mostly illegible writing to the right explained it.

So more of that.

While I was grading, I was watching stuff, as you do…and this amused me. ALMOST?

So you have 26 pairs? Or you have part of a pair? Also, yeah, so do I, at least.

This after a conversation on Thursday with two staff members who admitted to originally being afraid of me.

It’s OK. This was found on Saturday’s hike before dinner…

Also the sun is going down earlier. I forgot that would happen.

Same cat (Nova) on another quilt.

It must be fall, the cat-sitting-on-quilt season.

This after the Man went out with man friends. Although they did actually ask some questions this time.

I ask stuff when he gets back, and he’s like, “We didn’t talk about that” over and over again until I’m like, WTF did you talk about?! I’m not invited anymore (it’s all just guy stuff, no gaming mostly), and I just wanna know how everyone is doing. And I can’t ask them.

Let’s finish up with my favorite disappeared female aviator…

Go Amelia!

OK. It’s a short week because our school board has set these idiotic 3-day weekends (the next one isn’t even a 3-day…it’s entirely stupid) because they say parents want them. It’s true that a bunch of our kids are absent on Fridays or Mondays…but it makes it harder to teach. I’ll take this one though…we’re going camping up in the local mountains. It’s a full week though…three Zoom calls at night (none are work-related), plus at least three meetings? Four? Not sure. I give up on keeping track. Teaching something today…ah, reviewing potential and kinetic energy for roller coasters, which they’ll start designing on Thursday. Fun times. Then two meetings or three, not sure (principal says one thing then says something different in the weekly email that comes whenever he feels like it…I miss the principal that scheduled them for the same time every week). Then I’m either going to ceramics or coming home and grading, because I have book club tonight. Good book for that one. And then stitching a hole in my finger. NO! Finding the sticky thimble pad, so I DON’T stitch a hole in my finger. That’s the plan.

In My Head…

I have this post-it on my desk at home that says “2:07 damn x 2, WTH”. I stared at it for a bit this morning until I realized it was from the recording my co-teacher had two students do for us of the lab stations. I needed to edit out the swearing, best I could (and I did on one; the other one had to be redone for other reasons). IDK what your day job looks like, but that shit is part of mine. I do edit my language at school. In case you were wondering. I did get called out for a student for using the word ‘crap’ the other day (oh my; after being told to shut the fuck up by two different students…fun times). And I had a student years back who didn’t like it when I said “my lord”, which I do all the time. That was a hard one. I get her complaint, but I couldn’t fix that one. I think we settled on the fact that I wasn’t talking about HER lord, but some random British lord. And also some teaching about the fact that not everyone had her beliefs and she needed to relax a bit. I wonder where she is now? I wonder what she’s doing…

OK, so I’m still not done quilting, but it’s not the thread anymore. When I switched to the new spool, it did keep breaking, so I used some of that Sewers Aid stuff on the spool, but also, suspect the outside thread of the spool was more dry than the inside, because it stopped breaking. I would have finished quilting last night, but I went to a concert instead. Can’t say no to Billy Idol, Joan Jett, VIP table, and free tickets, can you? Yeah, it’s a school night, but I didn’t go to bed a whole lot later than normal, and I fell asleep right away for once.

Back to the quilting though…too many variables to know what solved the problem…science teacher should know better, but I was so frustrated that I just needed it to work…and it did.

I’ve made it all the way around three sides. I have half a side left and two little bits in between things, and then I’m done. The two possible binding fabrics were purchased Saturday morning before I went to LA, because the store I like is only open during my work hours, except for Saturdays, which is yes, in fact, totally annoying. But hopefully trimming it Thursday night and getting the binding on, done over the weekend, photographed next week? That’s the goal. And I had an awesome idea for the next one, which needs to go to a show and be done in December. Ha! OK, I know. I can do it.

I finished grades Monday night at 7 PM, so I allowed myself some stitching time…still stitching things down on this.

Those are pomegranates, so there are little circles going in each of those fruits as well. I will never finish.

So yeah, great show last night. Both singers in their late 60s. Joan rocked it.

She did not throw herself around like a 20-year-old, but she had the voice and the attitude.

And still played guitar.

Impressive.

Billy fucking Idol was good too…

Although seemed to show his age a bit more…for some reason, he reminded me of William Shatner. Not the sexy guy he was in the 80s, but who is? And he had a few musical moments that were questionable. But it was a good rocking show.

Definitely worth going out on a school night.

I was in bed before midnight. But then woken up after midnight. Ugh. It’s fine. He’s more tired than I am this morning, and the dog is just sad that barely anyone talked to him yesterday. Poor pup.

Cute Nova/Luna moment.

And this…not so cute acknowledgement of the current fuckery.

Oh so true. Get the fuck out.

OK. School. Fuck me. I was going to do something low-key chill today, but then I got a bug up my butt and now we are cutting and gluing. Because I’m nuts like that. It’ll be fine. I’m just concerned it won’t take the whole period. I have a couple of periods that literally can’t complete work assigned on previous days…if you give them 10 minutes to finish stuff, they spend it all goofing off and talking. I guess that’s the difference between me at that age and them. I would’ve been finishing everything so I wouldn’t have to do it at home. They just never finish it. After all that, and after torturing my co-teacher into planning for next week, because we literally have NOTHING planned (I’m freaking out), I will have pilates and I will have to take the trash out (with help) and cook dinner (wtf) and THEN quilt. Oh and probably grade shit too. Ugh. It’s fine. I got my grades done. The world is not ending. Yet. I have the next quilt in my head. Deep breaths.

I’ll Be Quilting at the End of It…

It’s pajama day at school today. It’s also supposed to be 90 degrees. Not sure those two things go together. But I am in pajamas. Flannel. Yup. With pockets though. I have a lighter pair, but they don’t have pockets. Yes, I know how to sew…clothing even…I could easily add pockets. In my spare time. I got none of that. In good news, the parentals are home, safe, not ill, and their lovely aged very deaf dog is back to their responsibility. In bad news, the day job continues to give me acne, bad sleep, and canker sores. I’m sure it will get better. Someday. Not this week though. This week is our first real lab and IDK how that will roll…this is where we can really see what last year’s teachers wrought upon us…that and the first long writing assignment. My hopes are not high. I realized (we realized?) last week that this group is not particularly independent, even when assignments are. I couldn’t grade anything, prep anything, even sit and help a kid I know needs it and won’t ask for it, because of all the kids requiring help who just didn’t listen to directions or quashing attempts to be social when supposed to be working. It was exhausting. Yes, there’s always some of that, but this was too much. So I brought home all the grading I’d been trying to do all week and did it at home…much faster. But eating up my time. Not OK.

Quiltwise, I knew I needed to do some embroidery on a couple of ICE vests that were too small to cut out words for…so I did that Friday night.

I was exhausted; I went to ceramics also and then my parents for the mail, so even though I had mostly prepared the night before to sandwich and pinbaste that night, I figured I wouldn’t have the energy. The boychild went to bed, then the Man, and Art Brain persuaded me to mop the floor, iron the backing, pin it to the floor, finish drying the batting (someone pulled it out of the dryer not dry…yes, I know who), iron the front, and then pinbaste the whole thing around 11:30 pm.

Absolutely some level of fucking nuts.

But honestly, much easier to do with everyone in bed. Dogs, cats, people out of my way.

Saturday night, I started quilting…

Made it through a healthy chunk of the dirt…

Then last night, I did the little people and most of the ICE agents dragging children through the swamp.

I’m sure I’ll be doing this most if not all of the week. And then I realized, how the fuck am I gonna buy binding? The store I usually shop at is open stupid hours and I’m going to LA on Saturday for basically the whole day. I’m not sure how I’m solving that problem yet. I’ll figure it out. Shop somewhere else, probably. Fewer choices in fabric unfortunately. Oh well. If you’re never open when working people can come in? Then they won’t come in.

This was the bed when I tried to get in it on Friday night. Eventually some moving happened.

Cute though. The Man is in there and those are all his babies.

I’ve been hiking every Saturday, late afternoon, about 3 miles, so I can eat a dinner I choose, instead of one my body allows.

It’s also relaxing, mostly. There were a lot of people this last Saturday. Less relaxing. There’s a fine line between hiking safely as a woman and being annoyed by all the people on the trail.

I drew at dinner…this was a two-dinner drawing.

The faster they serve the food, the more dinners it takes to draw.

Speaking of drawing, some of my students are truly amusing.

The arm gestures of Josh. So cute. Yes, I realize they drew a dead person, but it’s also a stick figure.

Girlchild is in Japan…I’m so jealous.

I asked what was going on in this photo, and apparently it’s joy.

This is not very iconically Japan…

But she looked more cool. So we get daily photos and videos of cool things in Japan. I’m very jealous. It wasn’t really on my bucket list (I was last there in 1967 at the age of nine months. OK it might have been 1968.), but maybe it should be?

And in political news…

Yeah maybe I should start saying that. What is your problem?

This is too true.

Sadly so. Also so much disinformation about this. I’m sad for his kids and wife; I’m also sad for the family of the shooter. I’m sure this isn’t what they wanted for him. But hey y’all…it was a white, religious, right wing extremist. Not the democrats. Not a trans kid. Not a woman. Not a person of color. Can we focus on the bullshit coming out of all those politicians’ mouths? And the guns…can we ever say the guns are the problem? I’m boggled by the about-shifts in social media with some of these people.

And this…with teachers and professors being fired over statements about Kirk. My partner says the world is a better place now. Is that a fire-able offense? Dowd is divisive? Seriously? I’m boggled by the rhetoric and the bullshit. Maybe I shouldn’t be. But I am. And the ignorance of history. That too.

OK. Well, all that aside, I do still have to teach middle school today. Energy! Still. Transformations of energy. Writing about energy. Using more than one vocabulary word in a sentence. Writing complex sentences. Things most science teachers don’t teach. Welcome to a literacy school. And two teachers who are readers. Then two different meetings after school. I’d like to go to ceramics, but I’m also trying to go to my quilt guild meeting, because Lea McComas is speaking there. It’s on Zoom, but it’s not the same thing. So IDK how the rest of the day will go; I just know I’ll be quilting at the end of it.

Hot and Ironing…

There is a delightful breeze coming through the window of my office right now, unlike the last three nights, when it has been hot as fucking hell in here and I remember again why I consider putting a room air conditioner in here every year around this time. And it was only in the 90s yesterday…last year, it hit 109 degrees during September (knock on wood; it’s only September 1, so it’s still possible). This room holds heat like crazy and the sliding glass door is a combo of unusable and unreachable, which is silly. Need to remodel this room with A/C and a slider on a remote. I guess one or the other. It does cool down at night…outside…but not in here. Bad design and/or no insulation in the walls. Certainly we didn’t see any when we did all the fixes to the rain damage. Houses built in the 1970s…they still didn’t build them well. So enjoy the breeze (and the day off of work!) because it’ll be gone and/or hot as hell in a few hours.

So it’s really hard to iron when it’s hot, y’all. I don’t even try until 8 PM and then I sit in here and sweat anyway because the fan can only be pointed below the level of the ironing board, or I’d have pieces flying everywhere. Plus the iron is putting off heat in a room that is already warm. Just since I started writing this, the room temperature has gone up 2 degrees. Anyway, on Friday, I came home after ceramics and ironed for 3 hours.

I was working on all the body pieces and the stuff around or attached to the main figure.

When I went to bed, I was missing some hair pieces, but I found them in the trash bin (which is why I don’t throw that out until the quilt is finished). Then Saturday night, I did the head and some other stuff around it.

I did an explosion and one of the Starlink things and part of the swamp. Here’s a better view of the head…

So many of Musk’s things blow up. All the pencil cups and the stapler and tape are there to keep the weight of the fabric from pulling the teflon sheets onto the ground. As it gets heavier with more pieces, this gets to be a harder balance and I need more weights.

Last night, I worked on the swamp and got all the base parts done; just the trees are left on that.

There’s some embroidery of the police/ICE badges to go on later. This puts me in the 1000s, so about 300 pieces left to go. Two or three nights? We’ll see. I mean, I could finish it today if it weren’t supposed to be 95 degrees in here and I didn’t have a thousand other things to do. Next up? Input grades. I think I finished most of the school stuff yesterday though. Besides inputting them. Oh wait, and advisory. Fuck. Forgot about that. Ugh. I have not fully found my routine yet. It takes me about 6 weeks usually. And Friday was super stressful for trying to get all the things done. This week is back-to-school night, plus two morning meetings, plus 7 new kids (ugh) and 3 kids moving classes and whoa…just found the fly yesterday that was buzzing everyone in the house. Either it died or Bowie killed it and didn’t eat it. Mmmm. Dead fly.

I need to try to get to ceramics today (oh my, it’ll be warm)…I got things attached and underglazed and felt really positive about this project that is more than a little stressful at the moment.

Not even sure how I’m going to get it in the kiln without breaking it…again. Ah well. Hope survives. I need to underglaze the flesh, fix more cracks, and fix the one piece of the flag that keeps popping off, which is better than the entire flag popping off, which is what happened last week. So frustrated with this right now. Remind me to do some smaller, less complicated things next. Really. OK, still need to finish the head. Ha!

I crazily hiked on Saturday, by myself, at like 5:15 PM (still 90 degrees, I think, but there was a breeze).

Three miles. Then I can eat things that might kick my blood sugar up…because they are less likely to have that jump. Well, they should be, but I ate too many fries and blew that. Ah well. Still working on it. Definitely more under control than it was three months ago, but the blood sugar still crashes kind of randomly at times, like last night. No reason. Definitely think my Saturday night glass of wine does it, but I didn’t have any last night and was still awakened at 4:30 in the morning with a low. Ugh. Sometimes if I get up (to pee and check my blood sugar with a finger prick), it’ll pop back up, like it thinks I’m getting up (no fucking way I’m getting up at 4:30 AM; you’d think my body would know that), but then it crashed again an hour later. Fuck me. I’m sure eating skittles at 5:30 AM is not a good life choice, but I don’t have another solution at the moment. And when I asked the diabetes nurse about it, she didn’t either. She wanted me to get up and have a real snack, and I’m like, no, not doing that unless it’s really bad and continuing to crash. I’m TIRED. I work during the day…with KIDS. I need a full night’s sleep. And I already reduced my insulin…so if it happens again this week, I’ll reduce it again. Supposed to be contacting doctor about that stuff, but I haven’t yet…maybe this time.

So the baby owl finally got chased off by mom…well, or did she? She has finally stopped hungry squawking though…but the other night, I hear noises on the slope and then a screech, so I look out there and two owls are in the tree outside my office window.

The lower one is looking up at the other one…and is smaller. Might be baby? This was the same night but I think that’s one of the parents, probably mom.

They were staring intently down on the slope, where this opossum was digging around…

I’m totally OK with the owls prowling the slope. I’ve got gophers and they’re tearing it up. Annoyingly.

I mentioned it was hot, yeah?

Cat evidence of temperatures.

And there’s this…

Also, let’s talk about how many of them are white men. But sure, y’all will pick on the one thing you think made them do it. We could just take the guns away from the mentally ill (well, honestly, mostly everybody), and that might help.

OK. I don’t have to work today! Well, I do, but not all day in a classroom. This is a short but painful week; I will be mostly dead by Friday. Good times! It will also be cooler by Friday, which will help. It’s September! A fun month for school…where things change daily for no apparent reason sometimes. Also we think our A/C at school might be out. They’ll have to fix it quickly because there’s a new state law about maximum temperatures in classrooms. But the rest of the day, I can read, iron, plant things (I did some of that already), anything I can stand in the heat. Working on a wool quilt has been out (ha!). I keep thinking I’ll start the embroidery on the border flowers on Homegrown, but I’d have to have the whole quilt on my lap, so that is not happening. I’ll just keep sewing little things down on blocks I can hold in one hand. I have a huge to-do list in my bullet journal, but I won’t get most of it done; let’s be real. It is nice to have a day off…thank you unions! And no, I didn’t make it to the protest march today because I didn’t know about it until too late, but yes! Protest the bullshit! Also the Zoom yesterday…I’m so glad that the closing ceremonies for my dual show at the Virginia Quilt Museum will be during Spring Break, so I’m planning on going out there and meeting my co-exhibitor, Lena Meszaros. Should be an awesome show, opening in January…come see us in the last week of March!

Seriously Bad Plan

OK, I think I remembered everything for today. Maybe. I’ll find out later if I did. I did come home yesterday and just finished my book. Because I wanted to. I worked too, unfortunately, but that’s a given with this job. You’ll come home and work at least a few nights a week, sometimes all the nights (ugh), or you’ll stay at school or come in really early to do it. Unpaid overtime. Fun times. Yesterday, my job was to get my rosters in order, figure out where all the special ed kids were (I mostly knew that) and read all their IEPs (individualized education plans)…they give us these short versions and they are mostly useless. Also, we have kids who should have these plans and don’t, because no one has ever identified him or the parents don’t want to know. The stigma…is apparently worse than your kid struggling in school. So I have one kid who doesn’t talk and another who never stops and two with Tourette’s but so far, no diabetics, kids who need heart monitors, organ transplants, or vision or hearing issues, beyond the normal “I have glasses but won’t wear them” and “I can’t listen to an adult because my brain is not fully developed”. No cerebral palsy or other diseases that will shorten their lives. We’ve had all of those. And they packed my classes full of neurodivergents, which is kind of my people…although I’m technically not one? Or am I? Hard to say. Art brain is a little whack and no one really tries to categorize it. So my rosters are done, my seating charts are mostly done, the first assignment is mostly handed in, and I’ll have to start grading things soon. Not today. Today I need to plan some during prep with the other two 8th-grade science teachers…and probably doing that for the next few preps. We’ve avoided it so far because brain power low. But we’re gonna have to psych ourselves up and do it. Ugh.

The art is slow right now. I only barely get an hour a night; partly, that’s my fault for reading when I get home and sometimes, if my blood sugar is running high after eating, I have to get on the stationary bike, and you know, one thing I can’t do on that bike is cut out little pieces of fabric. Unfortunately. Because I’d do it if I could, y’all. I totally would. So here’s Monday night…

So close, looking at the bottom of that top box of untrimmed pieces. Also, Nova was still supervising, but from below.

She likes to be around. Then last night, I keep thinking I might finish, but it’s like the box is the same amount of full at the end of the hour…

OK, I know it’s not, because I can see more of the bottom of the box, but do I know for sure that I’ll be done tonight? I do not. And tomorrow night is an artist talk at night, so IDK how much I’ll get done after all that. Ugh. I might be sorting pieces by Friday? And then starting to iron Saturday, but I already know my Saturday night is co-opted, so probably ironing all next week though…I know that. When is the 3-day weekend? I’ll be ironing then. For sure. So close to done!

Last night, I was dogsitting Annie and trying to type up rosters and this is her uncomfortable, need to be right next to me, position.

Yup. Paw touching me. Head down. Blood running into brain. She doesn’t seem to mind.

We ask the kids what they’re most worried about for the year…I did explain that worry is not the same as scared, but I also know who wrote the note on the right and he’s never telling us what he’s worried about. The one on the left is telling though…that’s a 13-year-old.

Me too, friend, me too.

No ceramics the last two days; too tired. I do like owls though.

Makes me want to draw a whole bunch of weird owls. In my spare time. Also I got my kitty’s cremains back and they are in this tiny box. She was so small at the end. At some point before I die, I need to bury all these boxes and cremains of all the animals who have helped me get through all the days…but right now, they live on a shelf in the bedroom. Weird, I know, but whatever. Maybe that’s a drawing in itself, all of them watching over me. Anyway, it was hard to pick those up and then think about going to ceramics, where I might have to interact with humans. Like nah.

So. To school…finishing up the safety assignment and then…well, we’ll see how it goes. Then pilates…my body will appreciate that. Then come home and blessedly not cook, but maybe read and definitely cut things out. MAYBE FINISH THAT. Nah, probably not. We’ll see. Staying up late to finish when I have to get up early tomorrow and have a really long day would be a bad plan…do you hear me, Art Brain? Seriously bad plan.

Totally Forgot…

Hmmm…there’s nothing like waking up on a Monday morning, getting ready for school, sitting down to the computer, and realizing there was something you were supposed to do over the weekend and you totally forgot about it. Oh yeah. I totally remember how school feels. Like that. Like this morning. Damn. It’ll be fine. Really. It will. There’s always tonight. Sigh. Even yesterday, I knew I had work, some work, and normally I would have done it in the afternoon, but I didn’t feel like succumbing to school on the weekend yet, so I didn’t do it until 8:30 PM. Not the best plan. Oh well. It’s done now. I will go write this other thing on the to-do list (which I made Friday and did not look at all weekend). Also, there’s nothing like food prepping a variety of breakfasts to get you through the next two months, and not wanting any of them when you get up in the morning. Score! Fun times.

OK, first full week of school with kids. Always a challenge. I think I mostly prepped today’s activity on Friday, which is good, because Advisory is only 6 minutes and I have to be on duty at 8:30 and I’m rolling late already. On Friday, I was amazing! I made it halfway to school before I remembered I hadn’t taken my insulin. OMG, yes, I had to turn around and drive back, so I didn’t have the day prepped, and first period suffered. I too suffered. I’m going to take my insulin right now. I used to take it at night and it was much easier to remember, for some reason. Morning brain foggy? Sure. That’s probably it.

I am still chugging along on the trimming…closer to done. Here’s Friday night, when we were going to go out to see a band, and that totally didn’t happen…

I can see some of the main figure pieces in there. Saturday night, I cut some more…

Saturday, we vacuumed the whole house, washed all the cat bedding, and I got the special pleasure of washing all the cats. Fleas. Ugh. The meds the Man was using were totally not effective. More meds are coming, but blech. It was a lot of work. So I’m glad Nova still loved me enough to sit with me. She made the most amazing yowling sounds during her bath. I think I started cutting out the flag there.

Sunday night, I’m definitely in all the little people and the gravestones.

And some veins and stuff from the main figure. I can see the bottom of the box, but I still think I’m two or three days away from done. I have almost 12 hours in at this point.

I went to ceramics on Sunday afternoon (hence part of the work chaos)…I need to get this part of the torso in the kiln, so I need it to stop breaking. Fuck me. Here’s me with everything laid out to reattach and reglaze.

Luckily, there was only one other person in there. She was spread out even more than I was. I have over 75 hours into this piece. Crazy. That’s the head in the front, under the plastic. I’m hoping to work on it today. But also to finish fixing things. I think there’s only one unattached thing right now (knock on wood), but some glazing needs to happen. Depends on how crowded it is. Hard to do with a lot of people around.

I did a little stitching down of things on Friday…with Nova’s droolio help.

I am really hoping to get these all stitched down soon. Too many other things to do. I delivered two quilts for a show up in Newport Beach on Sunday…the show opens September 12, but I can’t get there for the opening (it’s a Friday night…can we talk traffic?). So I cleaned those up, put a label on one, cut slats, packed them up, etc.

I hiked 3+ miles on Saturday…trying to make sure my blood sugar stays down for date night! And they moved the trail…

I hadn’t been here for a while and the entire middle section of the trail moved…not a little bit, but a lot. Weird. Maybe there was a sensitive environment over by the river that they were trying to protect? I could probably figure that out eventually.

This crazy ass caterpillar was in my yard this morning…it’s apparently a Rustic Sphinx moth…

Or it will be, if a bird doesn’t get it. It does seem like it’s ready to cocoon itself. Massive.

OK. School. I’m already getting texts this morning. Fun times. Teaching safety today. Then going to ceramics, then doing the work thing I forgot to do this weekend. I took pictures of all the kids and I need to put names on them. Ugh. It’s fine. I do it every year. It’s just time-consuming. Useful though. Helps me learn names and faces. Time to go. Get out of here. Go to school. No really, go.

Meetings…

First official Monday of the school year. Yesterday was the first Sunday and I totally ignored it…went to ceramics, prepped breakfasts (OK, that’s not really ignoring it), cut stuff out, stitched some things down. OK, I also did laundry and grocery shopping, so still not ignoring it…just not sitting down at the computer and sending emails. I did that Saturday briefly…wait, no, I did that yesterday. I so often end up in charge of things that I’m wondering, when I’m retired, if I will miss that. I will probably find something else to be in charge of. It is the way of my people.

Still need to get used to getting up at 6:30 in the morning and functioning. Not there yet. We night owls have a hard time with normal work hours. I do anyway. Today is an all-morning meeting about things, then nothing in the afternoon but classroom and prep. I’m sure I will have a few meetings pop up; they always do, but I’m going to try to leave everything at school for the rest of this week. I can do that for one week, right? Then my weekly emails from my team start, sent on Sundays. No grades until next weekend; that’s a plus, but I will have to do rosters and that stuff. Let’s hope there’s no other crazy stuff about to rear its ugly head. Here’s my team; apparently this is our 10th year together…

Mostly we get along. No really, we are like any group in that there are people who do certain things, and we work really well together and support each other, but sometimes, we need to isolate. So we do. That’s probably how we made 10 years.

I ironed Friday night; I really thought I’d finish, but then I looked at the clock and it was midnight and I was tired (up at 5:30 AM y’all)…so I stopped.

With about 5 planets to go…

So I did finish ironing on Saturday, despite having a long, mostly unproductive day, wallowing in Kitten missing. I’m still doing that daily…she was so tiny at the end and I held her until the end. And like I said before, here I am, in her space. Bowie keeps coming in and looking for her. Ugh. It’s fine; I’ll get used to her not being here. Maybe. So here’s the 187 fabrics I used in this quilt…

I love to sort by color. And here’s what I’ll be working on for the next week or so…trimming all of those.

I started that Saturday night as well.

Didn’t get very far; did another hour last night though.

It never looks like much at this stage. I’m going backwards through all the pieces, unless I flipped the pile at some point (which I did). But right now, I’ve cut out most of the planets, the stars, the sun, and I’m working on the spacey pieces in the sky. I barely started the barn owl. It’ll be a while. But it’s delightfully relaxing to sit on the couch and bingewatch stuff and not have to think too hard about anything. The sitting will help with the first two weeks of exhaustion too. Seriously.

I’m making a very strange head with a tree coming out of it for the ceramic sculpture I started in November.

Still needs eyes and stuff. Ears. Maybe. Yeah. Ears.

And I actually drew at dinner.

I’m going to have to start hiking on Saturday afternoons again so I can eat the dinner I want to eat. Revised. Blood sugar was high all day and then crashed Sunday AM at about 3. Fun times. When my body decides to be logical about how it deals with food, I’ll let you know. I think I’ve got it, and then it’s like, NO. You don’t.

Always true.

OK, meeting, then prep, then other meeting, then meeting here about trees, then collapse with a book. Then cut things out and repeat. Well, I don’t have to meet about trees again, but I’m sure tomorrow will be more meetings, just not full-school meetings in the library. For 3.5 hours. Ugh. Remind me to skip long meetings in retirement (which is still years away, but I’m still gonna think about it) unless they’re about things I love.

And There She Is…

People ask me sometimes what inspires my work (or sometimes, why the hell do I make what I make?). It’s just what’s around me…what I see, hear, read…and cats have been in my art since the early days. Kitten was no different. In fact, if I’m correct, she was in 45 of my quilts in the last 17 years. Geez. I must have liked her. Why do I put cats in quilts? They are in my life, my world, on my fabric, literally IN my quilts (that fur, y’all), on my quilts, on my computer, on my book, and they are comfort to me. They lie next to you, on you, claws in your clothes, drooling on your arm, biting you (Kitten bit me so many times, and once I needed antibiotics…she was mad), licking you, making biscuits on your near you, pouncing on your toes, waking you up in the middle of the night, in the morning, bounding on top of you, disrupting your book, your sewing, your ironing, your grading, your sleep, your yoga, and your meditation. Cats are pretty judgmental and often snooty, but they do love and come when they’re called…sometimes. Kitten got out once, through a screen, and disappeared for 24 hours and I freaked out. She came back though. And she swallowed thread once, after 10 years of totally ignoring thread, and cost me over $3000 in the summer to save her life. She had some weird genetic disorder and lost half her teeth, but still ate the hard food happily. She was feisty and sometimes vicious, but loved in the best way ever. And every time I come in here, into my studio, she is not here and I’m having a hard time with that. Do you know that this is the first time I haven’t had a cat (of my own…there are three here who belong to the Man) since I was 22? Yeah. Crazy. And no, I’m not ready for another one. There will be one…just not right now.

Oh man, the old sewing machine. On the left, Limbo, who was also 17 when he died, and Kitten at about 2 years old.

So here’s a retrospective of quilts with Kitten in them (Limbo is in some too…they all end up in the quilts at some point). From oldest to newest.

Disrupted, 2010.

Huge piece, made for the Sightlines exhibit. All the quilts connected with the two smaller pieces on each side.

There’s the detail. I didn’t always put the color behind her eyes…I had simplified cat drawing at some point. But in this one, it looked like her.

Green Tea, 2011.

I hand-dyed that background. Crazy how simple this piece was.

Water, 2012.

Most often, she’s on a shoulder.

And I often picked weird fabrics for the calico parts. A bell? She might have worn a bell in the early days. We did put collars on the cats early on, so we could hear them. Not any more.

Babygirl, 2013.

Interestingly named after another cat we had, an adoptee when my great great aunt died, but Kitten is in this piece, which won a Pussy award.

Earth Day, 2013.

Still simple.

I remember drawing this quilt in a cabin in Julian.

I Gave Already, 2013.

She’s in this one twice…the big plate the woman is holding was a list of all the things that were costing me money at the time.

But she’s also on my shoulder (and Ivy, the dog, is on my hip).

That might have been the year she swallowed thread. Can’t remember.

Wise Choice, 2013.

This is the quilt I made about Planned Parenthood International providing birth control to women who wanted it overseas, who couldn’t get it otherwise. It was considered political (why our bodies are political, I don’t know) and there was some questions about whether it was an OK topic for the show, but the curator, Carolyn Mazloomi, talked to me and said OK. It was my first introduction to Carolyn. This traveled with the Earth Stories exhibit for three years.

Here’s Kitten…

Bottom right, protecting the baby in the basket.

Love (not), 2014.

Rough year.

But there was a cat. Those Australian aboriginal fabrics are one of my favorites for calico cat coloring. So much variety.

Absolutely Nothing, 2014.

War, what is it good for? Yes, that’s a pile of men she’s standing on. Those who freak out about penises in my quilts should count them in this one. And there’s Kitten!

Awakening the Crone, 2014.

The crone, mother, and maiden in this one. Plus cat and owl on a shoulder. Look, barn owls before I had any!

In 2015, I made a bunch of smaller cat quilts and sold them all. The last one sold last year actually. Took it a while because it was the weirdest one. Here is Cat 6, 2015.

Owned by a friend of mine.

Here’s Cat 3, 2015…

One of my favorites.

Cat 2, 2015, owned by my mom…

And Cat 1, 2015, also owned by a friend.

Earth Mother for Ventura, 2015.

One of two quilts where I hid a cat in a boob.

In Deep, 2015.

Ivy the dog is on the right, fully asleep, and Kitten is checking out the bathtub. This is the first of a series of bathtub quilts, and she shows up in all three.

Part Time Oasis, 2015.

I can’t remember who argued the cat should have a heart, but I did add one.

The Goddess of Never-Ending Chaos, 2016.

There’s a lot going on in this piece, but Kitten is sleeping through it. That’s a Kaffe Fassett fabric I think.

Holding It All In, 2016.

Second cat in a breast. This was a response of mine to Earth Mother for Ventura, where I was told I could not have nudity. So this one has nipples. And a uterus. Although one nipple is part of the tiger pattern and one is a flower.

Give Me Time, 2016.

I actually have all the Wonder Under cut out for the head reversed. I somehow flipped the drawing and traced the whole head backwards and had to go back and retrace because the bird wouldn’t fit backwards. Haven’t made it yet.

Finding Peace, 2016.

The next bathtub quilt.

And Then There Was One, 2016.

A remarkably small piece with over 800 pieces in it. Crazy.

All Stacked Up, 2016.

Kitten hated water.

I Can’t Be Your Superwoman, 2017.

Simba is on the right of the stove, and Kitten is on the left AND on the burner.

More than one appearance…

MomSleep 2017.

This is a quilt that actually laid on a bed.

Not Less Than, 2017.

Midnight, our black kitty, died just before I drew this one. She’s on one shoulder…

She looks pissed off. And Kitten is on the other one, playing with a rocket. She was pretty playful until the last 18 months.

Some Like It Hot, 2017.

Calli (the dog) is on the left in this one, but also Kitten, who would occasionally walk on the edge of the bathtub.

We Won’t Go Back, 2017.

More man piles. Probably a penis or two. And Kitten.

Womanscape, 2018.

Yup. She made it into this one too.

Sweet Delicious, 2018.

Based on a poem I wrote.

Portrait of the Artist As a Young Woman, 2018.

Always a cat.

This quilt got stolen from a venue and put in the trash, but someone saw it there and called me. Thank goodness.

Heart-Shaped Box, 2018.

Curled up in a ball, paw over her face.

Bigger in the Outside, 2019.

Back to the shoulder.

Swallow Me Whole, 2019.

Can’t have a quilt about anxiety without a cat in it.

Oh wait, I was reviewing this post, and I found another Kitten in it.

Space Cat, 2020.

These are in order by year, by the way, but not in order within the year. I made this one after I put an astronaut cat in another quilt, Connected at the Hips, 2020.

So this was the first one.

Coronawood, 2020.

No pandemic without Kitten.

Here Comes Life, 2021.

Apparently she shows up for childbirth too.

The Way Out, 2022.

I’m making this one in clay. I think it has a cat too. It does.

Same As It Ever Was, 2022.

Shoulder cat. In real life, she never sat on my shoulder. She rarely sat on me. She was a right-next-to-me cat.

War Zone, 2024.

This was drawn well before 2024 though. The bottom bit was drawn at the end of 2023, but the original drawing was much older. I added to it though.

Seeking the Crone’s Protection, 2024.

That crone deserves a cat. Kitten was a head butter. Even at the end.

Lost in the Trees, 2024.

This was another old drawing made recently into a quilt.

Same fluffy cat that was in War Zone.

Portrait of One Self, 2025.

I mentioned before that Kitten spent the last year getting really sick and we’d think that was it, and then she’d rally. I drew this in one of the really sick stages. Didn’t think she’d survive to the end of making this quilt. Hence the wings.

She’s in here twice too. Another castronaut. Catronaut?

And last, but probably not last…because my brain does what it does…AI Is Not My Friend, 2025, the last quilt I finished with Kitten in it.

The original drawing on the right was repurposed into this drawing, so it’s older.

But there she is. She’s not in the one I’m working on right now, but I can guarantee she’ll show up somewhere in the next few months. Hard to imagine her not being here in the room, and all over my stuff. I’ll be finding her fur in fabric for years, trust me…Midnight’s is still everywhere. And she’s obviously in my heart and mind at the moment. Today is International Cat Day and everyone was posting cats and I’m like, but I don’t have one anymore. But I do. She’s in a whole ton of the things she made, and I even have a quilt my mom made of her. I’ll post that next week. I kind of feel like it was appropriate to spend a few hours today searching through all my work, looking for her. And there she is.