When I was in college, I took art classes (duh, it was one of my two degrees), including a couple of painting classes. I don’t remember much about the one class except that the professor was really nice and I liked his work. The other professor (are they professors if they’re hired as working artists who taught us AND took time off to make their own work? Not sure of their official titles) was traumatic for me and I came away from it knowing I wasn’t a painter, never would be. I had a friend at the time who was an amazing painter as well, and it’s hard to compare yourself.
That said, I found my art way, it’s good, but also realized with ceramics, that here I was doing all this painting, but more to denote shapes. Dye painting though… it’s painting, and I’m still trying to find my place in it. Originally I thought I would be all loose and freeform, and I did a few of those last year, but maybe drawing, which is much more controlled, and then filling in the drawing is just how my art brain processes the world. Because that’s what I’m doing so far here. But now that I’m realizing that, maybe I can flail out of that mold in the next week and do some things that are looser, less about line.
So I washed this one out.
And painted this one Wednesday…
I also flipped one tray of colors onto the floor…whoops…in case you thought I’d outgrown my klutzy stage.
And yesterday, I painted this one after some unfortunate experiences with men in the big wide world.
Reminiscent of a smaller piece I made a while back that is part of a larger group piece.
Today, I mixed three more colors (was waiting on additional supplies being shipped here) and made more mixers. I’d like to try some looser stuff this afternoon.
We had some beautiful clouds the last two days, plus a full moon, where we went out on the Playa, drank some wine, hung out, cut a lock of hair, and threw it to the wind. Like you do. Seriously, it’s not the first time.
Wait, those are last night’s clouds. Still beautiful though.
The smoke from one of the fires (not sure which one) is really bad here today, so I have everything closed up. Tomorrow I’m actually going to drive an hour to the local grocery store, mostly for veggies, but we also have some potlucks coming up. Today, I’m still eating a weird mishmash of leftovers. Kinda over it. I also met with my school team on Zoom for a couple of hours…wondering how this year is gonna go…sliding start of some kind. Not ready, but never am.
Ok. Mornings are just not my good art brain time. It might not help that someone is weed whacking (not a huge deal; my brain will currently distract itself no matter what).
I have to write down the day and date every day at the moment. Helps me focus. I did three dye paintings that first day, but have branched out a bit since then. And filling in lines I painted last year is different from creating anew…and the ideas are mushy, and the brain is trying to process everything, so that makes it harder at times. So my goal is one dye painting a day. But also leaving the cabin sometimes. Maybe just to take the trash out. Definitely the heat and air quality affect my desire to go outside during the day.
Monday, I filled in one of the drawings I did last year…
And I washed it out yesterday.
The fires near us are still affecting the air on a regular basis…air quality was in the purple range midday yesterday. It’s better today, but makes you think twice about when you go walk. So she obviously came from that.
Yesterday I started a new one from scratch.
Definitely considering war with that one. She’ll get washed out later today. Sometimes the colors change drastically; sometimes they don’t. And they’ll get a final washout at home, which will change them again.
I’ve been hanging them up in the studio once they’re washed out, so I can see my progress.
I do need to see what I’ve done and document it for myself, but I am also resting my brain and letting ideas roll around in there. I started doing a freehand cutting/stitching thing too.
Both these things are looser than how I usually create, which is harder for me…and one of the reasons I came here. Stretching the process, the brain.
I’m also still embroidering this every night…
This is taking a while, but I like how it looks.
I finished the one drawing…
But haven’t done any more. I really wanted to sit outside yesterday but everything was so buggy. I removed a spider, a beetle, and a wasp from the cabin yesterday. One unalived because nope, big spider, ick, no. I’m still dealing with some crazy bites.
I also spent a couple of hours yesterday morning in the local wildlife viewing area, which is all about birds.
What’s funny about that is that I draw a lot of birds, but they’re all made up.
These are real, and I rarely knew what they were. This goose refused to move for a very long time, then ambled down the road (this is a driving tour, not walking).
And I think this was a Bittern…
Unfortunately, my rolling my window down scared it off the pole it was sitting on. It’s so weird to me to drive through this…I spent the whole time apologizing to the birds for disturbing them. Also did not know pelicans lived inland. And I think the big dark birds I keep seeing are ibises. I’m not really a birder, but I like birds. Honestly I think I’d rather drive, park, and then hike it, but even walking makes birds leave, and I don’t have the patience to just sit for an hour.
Ok, so a dye painting today, plus wash another one out, plus do some fabric/embroidery stuff. Sounds lovely. might even paint a bird…but probably not a real one.
I’m sitting here in the quiet morning (well, there’s birds). I’ve had most of one cup of tea, breakfast, a shower, went and refilled my water jug (issues with arsenic in the water) and got my dyes out of the big fridge…hoping they last longer, although last year, I painted one piece 10 days after I mixed them and there didn’t seem to be much color loss. I made sure there’s enough money for the mortgage (don’t get paid in summer). The skies are smoky again today from fires well east of here, so no danger, just hazy skies.
There’s a lot of sitting around and staring at stuff, interspersed with dealing with food (not my favorite and the kitchen is small and a bit of a challenge), and reading. I’ve managed to finish stitching the binding and sleeves on this piece from last year…
And I started the embroidery last night, which is gonna take a while…but it’s kind of rhythmic, meditative, and a little brainless honestly, so I do this at night.
During the day, I started dye painting yesterday. The first one was a line drawing I did last summer, so I just colored it in.
It’s gotta sit around for a day, and it will be much less bright after I wash it out. They all will. I aimed for pastels (some) on this one because the landscape here is more in that range. We’ll see what actually comes of it.
I’m a pretty haphazard dye painter. I don’t test things out; I don’t keep track (much) of what I’m doing. I just wing it and hope for the best. Like this one…
It won’t be that bright.
I started a drawing yesterday but it’s not what I meant to draw…
It’s also not done. I sat on my porch for an hour or so and drew for a bit, stared for a bit, read a little, repeat. Like this is what life should be like.
Here’s the three drawings I did on the way here…I think all the fire pix were blurry.
I also used Inktense pencils and fabric painting medium to color this drawing from last year.
It’s not all art, all the time though. I went swimming in the local reservoir with some of the residents.
I went to the Paisley Mosquito Festival…the parade…
And the quilt show in the church…
Voted for my favorite. Also had some BBQ for lunch and checked out the two local convenience stores, which have milk and some other stuff, but not much in the way of veggies.
I’ve walked out on the Playa twice, once just a ways out…
So many crazy ground textures out there.
The next night, I ate dinner earlier, then set out prepared with a wet washcloth for my feet, plus water and a headlamp. At 3/4 of a mile, I hit mud that was collecting on my shoes, sticky stuff, so I went barefoot.
At about 1 mile out, it was so slippery, I knew I’d have issues…damn knees. And the water was still not close! So I turned around and came back. I walked some on the dried stuff but it got to the point that it was too painful…
The top layer wiggles a bit as you walk across it. Eventually I got some of the mud off and shoes and socks back on. If I try again, I’m taking my poles. We have muck boots we can use, but the mud is so sticky, it just builds up on the shoes/feet and you lose grip. Not today…too much smoke. Even sitting here, it’s gotten worse. All these poor people (and animals) being evacuated.
Morning sky…
I can’t see those mountains any more.
Ironing view…
Including cute little iron my mom gave me. Hoping to track down another table today for a dry setup. Not enough flat surfaces to cover for me.
Today’s plan is to dye paint some more…I’ve got a couple more line drawings that need stuff, plus a ton of fabric ready to go. Maybe finish that drawing. There’s a resident dinner tonight, so that should be fun. I realized I barely talked to anyone yesterday, but I did a bunch of socializing the day before…so that seems to balance out. It’s cooler the last two days, which is also nice, and less windy. Peaceful. I miss my kitty, but I get a daily pic…
Sometimes with bonus animals. And the Man sends a daily update on how annoying my chores are 😂. Yeah. Well aware. Anyway, gonna go make more tea and check the dye temperature…and then make some more art.
I’m half-lying on a daybed (who thought these were comfortable for sitting? They are only comfortable for lying down…maybe that’s the point)…wondering how hard it would be to bring the nice comfy chair from upstairs down here. Do I want to end up in a cast in the first week of my residency? Not really. Hmmm. Will think that over. Right now, it’s in the mid-90s, I have a fan blowing on me, and I’m processing lunch in my normal afternoon lull of energy. I’m on a computer, but all my photos are on a different set of devices, so I’m going to write and then add pictures, I guess. Or I could go over to the device and add all the photos and come back here and type? I do not have the brain power for this level of decisionmaking at the moment.
It seems the app also has issues. Ah well…back to the smaller device that is more difficult to type on. I’m a few days behind my actual existence. Honestly, I’m not sure what day it is. Friday? I think so. So on Wednesday, we made it to Crater Lake and it was much cooler than the apps claimed it would be. Something about a big body of water and elevation seems to make that happen. We were OK with it…also flabbergasted by the size of the lake/crater/mountain that existed before the volcano blew.
Really that’s what we do…stare at the valley/crater/lake and imagine the size of the volcano that used to exist there.
There were a few hikes available, but we only did one…
Out to a version of pinnacles…we’ve seen a lot of pinnacly things in our time (Bryce, Chiracahua, Pinnacles), and these were definitely different.
Caused by geothermal things (shockingly). Cemented minerals from the inside of fumaroles…mostly hollow. Very bizarre. But cool to see. Hot out though, so the Man refused the hike to the waterfall after. Not a problem…just a reason to come back. I always need a reason to come back.
The next morning, we were up and out early to get the Man on a plane home.
We drove north to Redmond, where the smoke was bad; lots of fires going on north of here. Hope they are improving. We did follow this truck.
Definitely smoky. I worked on this bird. I dropped the Man at the airport, and then ran some errands (gas is cheap here, y’all), picked up one of the other residents, went shopping at a variety of places, and headed south to Playa at Summer Lake, where I will be for the next 17 days, which sounds like forever. So I just saw a group of residents heading off to the local reservoir to go swimming. I’m OK. I’m tired, honestly…water might help? But I think I need some quiet headspace more than I need to swim. There’s plenty of time for all that.
Painting from Bend.
It was hot when we arrived, and a lot of the stuff in my car is from the trip up, but I moved it all in and just piled it up in places.
Mine is the building in the middle. Bedroom upstairs, living area, kitchen, and bathroom downstairs, and the one-story bit to the right is my studio, which is bigger than anything I get to use in my house. I’m debating going and asking them for another table at the moment.
There’s a pond right across the grass from me. It hosts coots and grebes and a muskrat I saw last night (first muskrat ever).
Then way out there is Summer Lake…we’ll walk out there eventually. It’s too hot and windy at the moment.
I woke up around 6 AM and saw this out the upper window.
I breakfasted with a marmot.
Here’s the first, relatively clear version of the studio, with everything unpacked. It’s all moved since then.
I spent time today making print paste and urea water, plus doing my laundry. I’m waiting for the print paste to set up a bit and then I’ll start mixing some dyes. I don’t have a ton of fridge space in my cabin, but I can store things in the Commons, which is the building just to the left in the photo up above. I might need to store the dye concentrates there. It’s too warm here.
There’s the wind picking up earlier.
So yeah. I’m here. Doing different stuff. I have some commercial fabric with me, not a lot. I have two dye paintings that need embroidery. I have a few line-drawing dye paintings from last summer that need color; I brought some Inktense pencils to try, but also might just dye paint them. I have about 10 yards of prepared fabric that can be dye painted. I have paper for a few quilt drawings for upcoming shows. And of course, I have my sketchbooks (only 3?). A lot of the people here have admitted to just needing headspace for a while, and I’m with that crew I think. Prepping dye things is one part of the brain (mix this with that and label it) and actually making something with it is another part. That part is not ready yet, but it will be.
Woo Wee what a week. Short week. Kicking my butt. I’m currently on crutches, just scheduled another brain MRI, waiting on podiatry, and dammit, I need to go take my antibiotics…hold on…be right back. Luckily, it’s Eid, so half the school has been gone…a few more came back yesterday, and we’ll get a few more back today (and lose a few more because it’s Friday…certainly some kids are NOT gone for Eid, just based on their last names). A couple of kids I think believe school is already done, because I haven’t seen them in two weeks. Fun times. I wonder how they function as adults sometimes. I hope they figure it out…and I know sometimes it’s parents making those lovely decisions. Sigh.
Anyway, to summarize, on antibiotics for a UTI (haven’t had one of those since I was pregnant with one of the kids who are now late 20s, early 30s), then woke up in the middle of the night unable to put weight on my left foot (probably a really bad flareup of plantar fasciitis; haven’t had that for 20+ years)…here’s my cankle at urgent care Wednesday evening…
I don’t think it ever got swollen when I had it before. Not like that. That warranted crutches. Probably need a boot…found my old one and it’s definitely very worn and has way too much velcro and padding. Sigh. Acupuncture? Frozen bottle of water? Tennis ball? IYKYK.
Also, Wednesday morning, I had this weird visual disturbance (weirder than the one I’ve had for two years now) and ended up on the line with the nurse triage, who originally said go to the ER, but then the symptoms stopped, so she said, uh, contact the neuro-opthalmologist you saw before, so I emailed. Got to work, got a call from my primary doc telling me to go to the ER until I told her symptoms were gone and I’d contacted the eye doc. Eye doc called during Period 1 and scheduled me for the end of the day, so I went for 90 minutes of testing to find out I had a typical migraine aura without the headache (damn lucky there) and the retinas were still fine and there were no weird things that weren’t already weird in there. Then down to urgent care for the crutches (x-rays show bone spurs…woo! I think it’s the other foot though, different from 20+ years ago). MY GODDESS. CAN WE JUST NOT. Apparently my body is ready for summer break; it’s gonna take me out for the last few weeks. Dudes, we have 2 1/2 more weeks…14 days of actual school, 4 of those are not teaching days. I just need to be able to walk and make art and see. And pee when I need to. (UTIs are common for teachers…I’ve been lucky).
The foot was better yesterday. This morning was a little hinky, but I’m sure being on crutches to get to the bathroom is OK (really rather not, y’all. Really rather not.).
Tuesday night, I traced. The foot wasn’t as bad Tuesday night and I have a pad I stand on and I really lean on the light table when I’m tracing anyway, so very little weight on the foot.
I iced and elevated for 2 hours before that. I wanted to go to ceramics but there was no way I was getting my 25-pound sculpture off the shelf and limping over to the table with it. The Man just wants me to rest nonstop and I can’t deal with that.
Wednesday, I spent 3.5 hours at the doc, between urgent care and eye doc, so I was in a lot of pain and exhausted. Iced, elevated, honestly cried a little, very frustrated. Eventually cut these out because standing? Not so much.
Scribble was so helpful.
Honestly, I moped for about 2 hours and then I’m like, what CAN I do? I can cut out all the stuff I’ve already traced and get a head start on that, tried to have a good attitude, took pain meds, went to bed, and it was better the next day. Took pain meds all day…stayed off my feet (watching student presentations)…and I was able to trace last night.
I’ve made it halfway through the 1100s. Yes, there are over 1400. But hoping to be done this weekend. Slight slowdown due to stupid body making demands.
I also worked on this, the first flower of 16 in the border of Homegrown (Sue Spargo).
I’ll be done in 2035. Maybe.
I got this from the doc’s office (on top of all the other stuff).
That’s mostly because of my mom’s breast cancer (which is fully in remission). But you know, I breastfed my two kids for a total of about 3.5 years, and I want to know what my discount is for that…because they always said it would reduce your chances of breast cancer. But this damn risk assessment model doesn’t give a shit about that. Annoying. I want my credits.
And guys, here’s my residency location from another view.
Oh man, can’t wait. I’m in the smaller cabin on the left in the middle. That’s a dock on the left by that tree. There’s a person sitting on it. Can you see me sitting there? I fucking can.
Also, I’d be there, but the crutches are slowing me down. It’s fine. I can handle it. Today, we are hopefully getting most of the presentations done (in my rolling chair)…solar system, planets, gravity, mass. Then home to ice and elevate and then trace some more. All day tomorrow hopefully…canceling pilates again (sigh). Maybe. Grading stuff. That will go away soon too. Never too soon. And it’s Friday, so that’s a relief. Short weeks aren’t necessarily easier.
It’s Friday. Pro. Con? We’re dissecting eyeballs today, which is cool, but I’ll have no voice by the end of the day and I’ll feel like I need a shower after touching all the gooey things. With gloves, sure, but it still gets old after all day. Also, the weekend sounds great, but I’m still buried in school stuff. It’s not fun. Trying to manage all the assignments for kids who were absent, make sure they have everything they need, make sure the kids who are in the classroom are caught up? The end of the trimester AND the end of a unit…make me want to scream, honestly. Sigh. Ah well. I will survive it, as I always do. It’s a frustrating job and becomes more frustrating when you have very little support. And as much as I appreciate days off (I worked during both though), it’s hard coming back. It’s like the work doubled while you were gone. Today will be nuts. I’m hoping to get to ceramics in the afternoon, but it’s entirely dependent on my exhaustion level.
Wednesday, I got borders on the littlest of the dye paintings I’m working on now…
Then pinbasted it…
And stared at it…and decided it needed some body parts in there to make it make sense. So I drew them out on paper…although, on the right, you can see my edit with my fingernail in the fabric below.
Then last night, I cut those out (edited) in freezer paper and appliqued by hand…
Better. Tonight, I’ll start quilting all of them. Mostly outlines and then the backgrounds and borders. Then hand embroidery after that. I might bind before the hand embroidery. Kinda backwards from what I normally do.
I also remembered that Stitchpunk (the SAQA exhibit) will be in Grants Pass, Oregon, this summer, and I originally had a plan to go see it. This is the closest it gets to me, at least so far. Fierce Planets goes to New Mexico in 2027. Also a plan (Winter Break road trip?). I’m planning my drive up to my artist residency, which is in Eastern Oregon this summer. We had planned on Lassen National Park and Crater Lake; and I think we can pull off Grants Pass too (just don’t tell my partner yet? He’s gonna be stressed about the driving I think). Bend is where I put him on a plane home before I drive southeast to the residency.
Busy trip. Gotta get up to Lassen too, which is no small feat. Gonna work on that trip this weekend, plus hopefully start my taxes…fun times. Plus grade shit and work on the burgeoning greenery of my yard in spring.
Today though…today is eyeballs and chaos and clay and fabric and maybe reading my book a little bit. I need to finish one by Wednesday, so I should get on that, but it’s an old actual physical book and the font is tiny and crowded and annoys me. Ah well. I’ll get through it, all of it, enjoy the sunshine, playing with fabric, petting a cat or two and maybe a few dogs and then realize there’s only three weeks until Spring Break and I might actually survive that. Maybe.
I’m back home. Briefly. Like four days, then gone again. I seem to have squished all my travel into a two-week time period. Like it’s almost not worth unpacking before packing again. Different trips though. For the residency, I needed to take seven thousand modes of artmaking. For visiting my daughter, I can stick to a sketchbook and some stitching. I do want to finish up using the dyes today…I should already be doing that, but I got distracted by things. I am very distractable. Distracted. Possibly distracting.
So here’s the last bit of things from the week at Dorland…this is where I dye painted every day in the morning and the evening, when the wind stopped being a crazy dick.
Sometimes it would pick up again right at 9:30 AM; sometimes it wouldn’t even have died down at 7 PM. I’d get a random 20-mph gust and be holding onto everything. But that was part of the challenge. Get up! Get off the chair, out of bed, and go paint before the wind or the dark comes! I’m having that problem today…no wind to make me move my ass. But I will paint today. As soon as I’m done with this, I’ll go set up the table in the driveway and paint until I run out of prepped fabric and/or dyes. I think I can do another 3 or 4. I like it! I don’t like all of what came out of it, but some of them I LOVE.
This is the last one I painted up there; the dyes washed out a lot (but I don’t have a picture of that yet).
I still love it. I’m going to wash all of them this week in the washing machine, final wash. Then decide what to do with them next.
Here’s these two washed out…I love the different ranges of brown in the top one. It all looked the same before I washed it out.
And the bottom one is perfect! By the way, I finally got test results and contact from Sharp…the test results popped up around midday (yes, I was obsessively checking the goddamned app every hour). Benign! Damage from last year’s surgery, probably from the radio transmitter thing they put in, because it went in in a different location from the surgery. Probably next year’s MRI will show damage from this biopsy. Sigh. Thanks body for inflammation and necrosis.
I also finished the second leg on this thing…
Just needs arms and a head. Not sure when I’ll get to that. I like doing it, but it’s so freakin’ slow. Not that the other methods I use are fast really.
I also tested out some of the other mark-making devices I had around the house. I need to wash these out and see what survives.
Some of those line drawings need color or something.
This view is of the valley during the day.
Oh man, I killed so many spiders in the house, mostly littles, but some bigs. One might have been a scorpion and one was a yick ugh camel spider/wind scorpion, not really either of those. It was under my bag when I moved it, went under the wood stove. Then the leather chair. I was obsessively watching it because it was huge. Went to bed and it moved across the room, under another bag (or worse…there were TWO of them). It was moving sluggishly and then sped the fuck up, when I screamed and brought in the shoe. I was gonna put it outside, but fucking no, not if you are that speedy and aggressive. Apparently it doesn’t have venom though…it just wants to be UNDER. Blech. No pictures. You can google it if you want.
I think this was from Sunset Point, which has a similar view to my porch. Closer to sunset.
There was a need to see the sun set each night. I’m going to be honest and say I never saw it rise. Mornings are not my thing. I did do one hike, but didn’t bring poles, so I didn’t do the whole thing. Probably did a mile and a half. Was strangely paranoid about wild animals and/or falling. Anxiety is a fun thing. It manifests wherever the fuck it wants.
Here was the indoor space when I had multiple projects going. I was in a Zoom or webinar, one project on the porch, a pile of stuff under the table, sewing machine to the left, the beginnings of the woman on the right. It was chaos.
Probably a smaller space wouldn’t have worked for me. I didn’t play with everything, but I did play with a lot of things. It was good; it was nice that it was close enough for me to fill the car with things to try. A longer trip? I’d focus on one type of thing, I think, and probably not the dye painting. It is chemical/supply heavy and a pain in the ass, honestly. It doesn’t mean I won’t do it again. I just am aware of the time suck now.
Once a day, y’all.
Some things from what I was reading over the week…
Drawing boobies whenever you want to. Still Christopher Moore’s Anima Rising.
This is intriguing…
From Rebecca Solnit’s Hope in the Dark.
Terrifying to think of…
More about education…
It’s mind boggling. But true. As is this…
Not my Supreme Court…still.
On fire.
I didn’t consciously know about the poet Andrea Gibson…I don’t follow a ton of poets. Maybe that’s a problem. But their stuff is beautiful.
And the world is less full and rich with their being gone…although their poetry remains.
While I was gone, two artist friends of mine were at the Lubeznik show in Indiana…in front of my work.
Which was cool to see.
I got home and unpacked a lot (not all of it) and cleaned part of the fridge, ironically, because to check out of the cottage, I had to clean it to save the cleaning fee, and I probably worked harder there than I ever do at home. That said, there were some things I pulled out of the cupboard that were sticky and I cleaned them prior to using them. But my fridge at home is mostly gross and I needed to get rid of some stuff, so I did all that. Kitten is now full time closed up in my office, to avoid Bowie interactions. So I’m living with a litter tray and food and water. This will be a little problematic when I need to start ironing tonight, but we’ll manage. She’s seriously old and needs peace. She’s currently on an old office chair and can jump down for what she needs. What she really needs today is a bath. Maybe later.
I also sorted the Wonder Under I finished cutting out up at Dorland…
I was tired after that. I’ll need to do some cleaning in here to be able to work on the next step. I also need to go into the ceramics studio…not sure when that is happening. I’ve got three doc appointments in two days (and one is a root canal, fun times), plus pilates (my hip is looking forward to that). Still trying to figure out the patterns of my blood sugar. Oh! And I need to make a video for Quilt National…I should do that today. Maybe. Maybe I should clean first.
Nova was glad to see me yesterday…
Lots of love. The others too…
OK. Dye painting today. I should shower first. I have pilates later today, but in the middle of the day, like a freak. I need to eat something. Might go straight to eating lunch. I have a headache. Sleep related? Not sure. My hip really hurts for some reason. The weather is weird, all cloudy and delightful. I should take advantage of that. So many things to do! That’s why being gone was so much easier.
Sure I’m never gonna have just one thought. My brain works way too fast in a branching psychosis that may be helpful in some situations, but sometimes ties neurons up in knots and creates flailingness. I’ve been working on art stuff most days for about 4-6 hours on and off, depending on the state of my brain. I should be able to work for 12 hours, right? I do know that pre-COVID, I would spend 6-8 hours on a break day or a Saturday, just working on one piece…but that’s a known process, it’s ironing all the pieces to fabric, it’s cutting things out…the idea already exists, the process is something I’ve done for years. This? Is not. This is fucking around with new ways of making. New ways of thinking and working. Somewhat exhausting. GOOD, but definitely the neurons needs breaks.
Here’s my thought. And it’s one I’ve had before but it is just being reinforced by this week away. I need to do this full time. Well…I first was going to type “more”… but full time is the reality. Nope, the reality is that I can’t afford full time right now. I’m watching a webinar right now where I know these artists are full time…and I don’t know HOW (retired? Partner supports? Independently wealthy?). I am none of those things. I am aiming for the first. The other two are out of reach. That said, I can do more. I think. I say that and then school punches me in the face. Imma punch back this year.
SO. I just posted all these pictures in order of when they were taken using the ancient iPad, and that’s not how I usually write. I usually do it more thematically, but I don’t want to waste two hours like I did Wednesday. So it’s gonna be that way.
The dye paintings have to sit MOIST and DAMP for 24 hours, so I make piles of them in cut-up and taped plastic bags with the dates/times written on them that I painted them, and then I wash them out as I go, more than 24 hours later. I knew that peach would get less orange, but I love that the blue stayed so blue. I love the top one…the bottom one I also love, but it will need some handwork, I think.
I’m trying things out here. On the one hand, I like the thin line I get with the tiny applicator, but it’s hard to draw with on fabric. The thicker ones are easier, but bleed more. But I also want to mess with just color and dye. So this is all trying stuff out.
Scrub jay. It’s loud and visits every evening. Last night, they brought a friend.
I forgot to take a picture of this piece before I covered it; the thin lines dry out really fast and it was in the afternoon, so it was warm and windy and I was afraid it would dry out too much and not set. And I haven’t washed it out yet…so I don’t know whether it set or not. That’s on my list for this afternoon.
Here’s the other line one I did that WAS washed out, although it needs more washout with Synthrapol…there’s a shadow as I let it dry. Obviously, these need color. Or maybe not. I think they do.
I have fabric paints and pencils and pens and a whole host of shit I brought and am not going to get to try. I overplanned. Wait, I always do that. It’s not a surprise. The Man is coming to visit today through tomorrow, and I’m going to send some stuff home with him, because I’m either done with it (threadpainting) or I’m not going to get to it (ceramics, probably paints & pens & pencils…still thinking about that). Once he leaves, I don’t have much time left anyway…just Saturday afternoon and evening. Sunday is mostly packing and cleaning.
This one…I love this one. I outlined with a thin brush, not the applicator. Still a pain, but less than the applicator. Then painted. The color, the orange, a lot will wash out. but I still love this.
Once you mix the dye paste, it’s hard to know how long it will last. One book says 5 days; the other says “keep track as you work so you know”. Um. Well. This was yesterday morning, and I mixed all the dye paste on Monday (took forever because of the wind). I think today is day 5. I still have a bunch of paste left, though, so I might just keep going and assume they’ll get more pastel with time? It really is just a matter of how much of it washes out. I have a shit ton more fabric. And a lot less wind at home. And a few days off before school starts. Actually, there are a million doc appointments in three days, and then I leave for San Francisco and the girlchild and more looking at art. I love this for me!
I read Christopher Moore’s new book, Anima Rising. It was great. Lots of art and cultural and literary references.
I love Sedna.
This is either the same alligator lizard that was on the door or another one (I think it’s a bigger one, honestly). NATURE!
Luckily, this one was outside. With the snake and the squirrel and the fox and the ravens and the owl. But NOT the spiders. I’ve killed 5 so far, 4 of them giant ugly grass spiders who survive multiple shoe whacks, and one bit me while I was asleep (not the grass spider; something smaller and bitier)…on my NECK. Freaked out by that. And yet, I continue to walk around barefoot. I did leave out the spider-killing shoe though…as a warning?
I was on two Zooms yesterday, one where an artist explained how she bought a church and remodeled it to be living space and studio (not happening here in San Diego…Susan Lenz, in case you’re interested) and one was my local SAQA meeting, with a presentation by another artist (Angela Jean). Both were interesting, but I couldn’t focus on anything else, so I embroidered the…is this June?…block of Sue Spargo’s Rooted. Finished this one…
And started July. Here’s the setup where I’m working on the female figure. I thought I might work on that, but apparently the brain can’t listen with intent AND make art with intent.
I need to edit some of these photos, but I might have to go back to the iPad for that, OR leave them be. Frustrating process. Not sure why I can’t do it on the app here.
Here are these two washed out. I love the top one. The brown washed out but still looks great. I can quilt this and it’s done. The bottom one…well, I loved it when I painted it, but I used the thicker bottle applicators and it bled like crazy…which doesn’t work for this. I’ll have to decide whether to fix it somehow? Or chalk it up to practice and make a cat blanket.
This one I think will wash out well…the browns have a lot more colors in them that will show up after the washout. I had a plan, but then accidentally dropped dye in some places I didn’t originally have dye…
A learning experience. I did this one last night. It was dry and the wind kept picking up randomly. There were storm clouds floating around, but nothing stuck…until the 5 seconds of rain at midnight or so.
I just take lots of sky pictures…weird for someone who isn’t really a landscape artist. The sky is way more complicated in person.
In the afternoon and evening, I worked on this. OMG this is so time consuming. I guess I didn’t come up here to find faster ways to make art. This is with 9 hours in.
I get one section pinned and then stitch it all down (by hand…that may be part of the issue, but hand stitching doesn’t make things as flat as machine, and that’s what I want). I had to add another section to the bottom to accommodate the feet. I still need to work on the lower legs and then the arms, and goodness, she might need a head. So it’s not getting done here. But I like it. It needs a lot more. Also, I so did not need to bring two giant boxes of fabric for this. But I ran out of time to edit fabrics.
So yesterday was business day 6 of not hearing back on the boob biopsy. I called in the morning and they said all the things, I found out that my doc IS on vacation this week (she’s allowed), and I asked for the sub doc to call back or something. The nice man (who is a man and maybe doesn’t understand boob anxiety) said “oh I’ll send a message and they’ll answer in another 3-5 business days”. OMFG. I explained that I’d already waited that long. I have an appointment with my doc next Tuesday anyway, but I really don’t want to wait another however many business days to hear. Did I hear yesterday? Nope. Nothing. Kept my phone on all day, nothing but fire warnings. SIGH FUCKING SIGH. So this morning, I wake up, slowly, and I check my email while trying to get functional enough to do another dye painting, and Sharp sent an email that new test results were released, check the app, and my heart races until I get the app opened…and there’s nothing. No new results. No letter. No message. Nothing. Fuckers.
So I painted this.
The wind picked up, but I think I got my point across. It’s not even the correct boob, but I don’t care. And then I sat through an art webinar that told me I needed to quit my job and make art full time. Ha! It didn’t actually SAY that; I just thought it afterwards.
OK. So I’m still boob anxious. Betting that doesn’t change today. I need a walk, I think. I need to wash out like three things? I think. Maybe two. I have a meet and greet tonight with the other people here. Need to bring an example of my work. Ha! I need to clean up and organize a bit so the Man has a place to sit. I need to work on the lower legs of that other piece. Oh shit, I drew last night too…apparently that picture didn’t come over. Let me see if I can do it on the phone (how many devices do I need to post one thing???).
Answer: three devices, because two of them suck. Well, they all suck in some way, or I wouldn’t need more than one. Original post started on ancient iPad, added most photos there. Saved draft. Typed most of words on laptop. I am old school. I am also old. It’s just easier to type with a real keyboard than hunt and peck. Edited photos and added the drawing photo on the phone…too small for typing.
Walk, then eat lunch, read book, then clean up. Wait. Check Find My app to see if the Man left already. Nope, he’s in the bedroom (scary, huh? He’s actually probably in the bathroom.). So I have at least 90 minutes before he gets here. Then wash out any dye painting that’s more than 24 hours out. Then do other things. Art things. Maybe talk to a human today. I haven’t in a few days. Except on Zoom and the phone with Sharp. OK. Do the things.
Hello from Temecula still…it’s not far from home, but it’s far enough. I wished yesterday for my ironing board, but survived without it. I forgot Q-tips, but someone had left some. I might leave the center today to buy some stuff…or I might not. I’m feeling like town would be a shock to my system. So do I really need the stuff on my list? Probably nots.
Things I’m realizing so far: I hate rethreading my machine. It’s not hard. I just don’t like to do it. On this thread painting, I rethreaded it at least 25 times. No 35. Too many (for me).
She needs a base to live on…not sure what that looks like, but I’ll figure it out. Maybe when I get back.
I made about 14 dye paste colors, then painted one Monday night…
I think a lot of the orange will wash out, but we’ll see. I will be washing that one out after writing this and watching the SAQA Textile Talk about art communities. I will be washing Tuesday morning’s piece too…
Dye is nuts because it has to stay damp for 24 hours and then you still don’t know what it’ll look like. I’m embracing that. (Update: it’s taken over two hours to try to get this post to publish even as a draft…the iPad is old and apparently couldn’t handle it any more…so I’ve washed both out…I’ll post pics of those once they’re dry. I’ve also spent the last two hours listening to sirens going by; there’s a fire about 10 miles east of us that ballooned up to 200 acres. It’s moving away from us, but I did walk up to see the smoke–I’m down behind a hill–and was distracted by the Watch Duty app and evacuation warnings. None here…)
I did a black outline piece Tuesday evening, but the wind kept popping up and I didn’t want it to dry, so I didn’t even take a picture of it.
Finding places to store these is getting problematic as they get bigger. Now I’m just stacking them under that table, but the oldest ones are on the bottom…which is only an issue if I’m being systematic about washing them out. I want to see what they’re gonna look like. Am I wasting time on these? No because it was something I wanted to try.
Trying to beat the wind, I got up a little early this morning. I went to bed early but then had a blood sugar issue and didn’t get back to sleep until late. I might need a nap later. This one has a lot of color, and I used the dye bottles to draw.
I can’t say it’s easy to do and the dye paste might be a little runny, but I wanted to try.
This one I started because the wind hadn’t picked up yet, so I decided to try a small one with brushes instead of the bottles. The first one I did was all brushes too.
The dye paste mix is apparently good through Friday, so hoping for two or three more a day.
I also pieced a background for a more free form piece I’ll be working on today…I think.
I have a limited amount of non white fabric (I have a shit ton of that)…wait, not true. I have a lot of crazy-quilt-type fabric with me, but wanted a cotton base to build on.
This is where I wanted an ironing board… but I figured it out. I have a small pad, but it was hard to get this done. It’s still not flat but there’s gonna be stuff on top, so it won’t matter. I’m very cavalier about flatness. A lot of it quilts out, thank goodness, because I am not a master piecer.
There was a sunset meet and greet, although only two of us showed up. We had a good conversation though.
It’s really hazy up here, apparently still from wildfire. Little ones keep popping up, but nothing I can see from here, thankfully. I have my phone on in case my biopsy results come in…pretty sure my doc is on vacation unfortunately. I may call if I haven’t heard by tomorrow. Today is 5 business days. Stressful. So the phone keeps chiming in with fire notifications instead. I did not realize the original arts community up here burned back in 2004…so this is the rebuild. So it’s a good idea to keep the phone on.
In the evening, I like to sit and cut things out or stitch. I finished all the Wonder Under on Monday night…
7 1/2 hours. It’ll have to wait until I get home to get sorted and ironed to fabric.
Then last night, I pulled out the embroidery threads and that black and white improv quilt I finished last week and started working on it.
I don’t really have a plan, which is fine. I’m going to be here for a while (here being handstitching on this piece).
Ok, some random things…I brought way too many clothes for someone who was gonna spend 50% of their time in one set of barely acceptable dyeing clothes.
On Monday night, a huge spider (ok my Australian readers will laugh at my idea of huge, but a lot of ours are poisonous too, so bear with me) ran across the floor into the pile of stuff I brought and I got up and halfheartedly looked for it, but figured it would just stay out there. Until I went to get ready for bed, and faithful readers, either there are TWO of them or that fucker followed me into the damn bathroom. Big and stalky. Nope uh uh. Got a shoe and waited for it to get out of a corner and whacked it 5 times before it succumbed. Flushed its body but there were three legs I couldn’t deal with…too creeped out, so I left them. Next morning, two legs were gone. This place has ants….not horrendous but enough that you don’t leave your dishes out, and those annoying bastards had taken the two legs for me. By this morning, they took the last one. I feel more friendly toward the ants now. Also there better not be another giant spider in the house. I killed a big red ant and a smaller spider, and then there was this guy…
I called it “Sir” about 10 times before persuading it to leap from the door.
I was going to go run errands, but none of them are desperate. Fire makes me anxious. Plus I haven’t gotten much done (besides dye painting two things, washing out two others, watching an art zoom, and trying to write this beast…way easier on a computer than the iPad, for sure. I need a new one. It’s ancient.) and I feel sort of reluctant to go anywhere. I’d have to put a bra on probably. And fight all those fire engines to get out (not really, but I’d rather stay out of their way).
OK. Rest of the day? (Note to nosy self: bring binoculars next time you’re on a hill.) Start freeform placing the figure on the pieced base. That’s all I’ve got. Brain is tired. I have lots I can work on…not worried about that. Play some music to drown out the sirens…that damn fire app will tell me if there’s an issue, but the fire is definitely moving east, away from us. Drink more tea.
Oh hey. Monday…first full day at my residency at Dorland Mountain Arts in Temecula…really just a week away from all the shit I need to get done at home and a chance to try out some new and/or different stuff. Right now, I’m waiting for the midday wind to die down so I can make more dye paste. I made some this morning and had to make more print paste. When I went out to make the rest, the wind was a bit crazy, so I did some thread painting instead.
Meanwhile, I had two pieces in the Infinite Rivers exhibit at The Front Arte Cultura gallery in San Ysidro on Saturday night. This is My Body. My Choice.
It’s about abortion rights, looking at different types of people who might need an abortion, pushing back against the bubble people who try to force their beliefs on everyone.
This is Same As It Ever Was.
When I got there, the little girl was leaning up against the quilt and eating. Her mom or grandma was selling some baskets and woven things, so they were sitting next to it. I asked the little girl not to lean on it (it is mostly washable, but I try to avoid it if possible) and then later told her she needed to be in the photo, so she produced a perfect smile (unlike me, who often produces some fake smile and I don’t even know where it comes from).
This quilt is about a lot of things…white women’s feelings about Roe v Wade falling, while people of color, indigenous folks, and LGBTQIA folks remind us that for some, it has always been this way, big red-faced white men in suits and robes yell at us about all the things we don’t get.
It’s a great show with a lot of variety. I’ll try to post more when I get home. Some things are just easier on a computer than on an ancient iPad.
I’ve been cutting out more Wonder Under up here…now 3/4s done.
I will probably finish tonight, ready to sort and iron when I get home.
I packed Saturday night and Sunday. I wasn’t sure it would all fit; I’ve got 4 different types of projects I’m working on here and they each use a different part of my stash. Kinda nuts really.
Here’s the cottage I’m staying in…
And the porch where I’m dyeing…
Fabric dyeing. Not end of life dying. that silent ‘e’ is really difficult in a conversation.
Did a short hike yesterday…up to the tiny lake, down to Sunset Point, up part of the Dorland Mountain and Bee Canyon hikes. It’s too warm to hike until 7 PM-ish, which doesn’t leave much time. I’m not an early riser. I also prepped some of the chemicals for today. I should have done more, but I didn’t realize the wind would be so boisterous.
I also prepped the fabric. Then last night, I tried some line drawing with the machine…
Thread tension was cranky as shit, even after I cleaned everything out. But eventually I got something to play with. Then today, I tried some thread painting.
Got a lot more to do on that one.
I still have the dye stuff set up outside (consolidated now because the wind blew most of it off the table…wind is not joking)…
Storing some in the bathtub so it doesn’t dry out.
I’d like to take a nap (didn’t sleep well), but I feel like I’m waiting for the doc to call with biopsy results and don’t want to sleep through it. Silly. I’m sure I’d hear it. Just tense about it.
Ok, the wind is still nuts. I know it calmed down last night. So I’ll do some more stitching inside until it chills out. Here’s a treat from last night…