Come as You Are, as You Were*

147 fabrics. Over 19 hours. 1350 or so pieces. Finally completely ironed down to fabrics. At around 12:20 AM. As always, I made an attempt to use fabrics I hadn’t used ever, or at least in a while. I do have my favorites…they’re easy. I need a challenge sometimes to branch out and use up all the crazy stuff I buy.

Here’s all the second cat pieces, except for the eyeballs…

Kitten is fun to put in quilts because she has lots of colors…

And here’s all 147 fabrics I used…

I won’t put them away until the whole quilt is ironed together. Just in case I missed something or need to recut something. It happens.

I’m a little wigged out by my schedule at the moment. I’m losing today and tomorrow to family stuff, I still haven’t finished the copyediting, not even one readthrough (Microsoft Word is being a cranky bitch), and I haven’t finished grading the big project (should be able to finish that on the drive today). Last year, I had a quilt that had to be done by January 1 (and photographed), and today last year, I was already ironing it together. Probably because I blew off the grading and didn’t go to another family event and didn’t copyedit anything. But I was significantly ahead of where I’m at this year.

Then again, it was only an 800-piece quilt, I finished it by December 6, and it was way smaller too. I will get this one done. Somehow. I’m actually way more efficient when I’m in school. Seriously twisted that. Because I don’t have time to waste, I guess.

I did two nights’ worth on here…on the chain stitch at the top.

That’s about 330 days of stitching on there. I won’t do this again, I think, but I’m seriously considering piecing a small crazy quilt in black and doing some stitching on that, with this as the center. I miss all the stitching I used to do. It doesn’t fit the art I do now…or there aren’t enough hours in the day to do it anyway.

OK, need to be in a car in 38 minutes. Or less. Long day. But worth it, I hope. Seeing some people I haven’t seen for a while. Ideally I’ll finish grading this monster project (in the car) and get started on cutting out the 1350 or so pieces that need trimming now. Realistically, that will probably take me all next week, and maybe December 2 I’ll be able to start ironing this beast together. Do that for the next week? That gets me to the 9th. Stitch down and quilting and binding. Yikes. I think I’ll be OK. It’ll be tight. But in previous experience, when it’s tight like this, I rise to the occasion.

Still avoiding the shopping though.

*Nirvana, Come As You Are

I Couldn’t Get Away*

Happy Day after Thanksgiving, the day that splits your friend/family groups in two: either you avoid shopping like the plague or you’ve been doing it since midnight last night. I am the former. I need cat food, though, so I might venture out for that. Maybe. And people food. Although I currently have a turkey in my oven. That’s because I will get no leftovers from the two Thanksgivings I went to, and that’s fine, but I want turkey sandwiches for the next two weeks, and there’s only one way to get that: cook it yourself. It’s easy enough. She brined for a day or so and I tossed her in the oven this morning. I need to make biscuits for tomorrow as well (to go with the poop emoji rolls). But that’s easy to do.

Still on my list: the entire vacation has been all about grading, copyediting, and ironing. I should have been able to finish the ironing last night, but my brain was fuzz…I graded for about 3 hours after Thanksgiving dinner…and then tried to finish the ironing. More about that later.

So my monsters (the ones I birthed) met in Ithaca, NY, for the Day of Food, and I asked for good photos, but didn’t get any of them together (sigh), but got this…

And this…

Well. I guess that’s something. They did a great job of making a Thanksgiving feast, although the girlchild used to make pies from scratch (something about a 6-hour drive each way and an essay being due)…

Here was mine…

It was good.

Then, like I said, 3 hours of grading. With this guy. No I’m not freakin’ done. Sigh. This one project is taking hours to grade. I’m going to do more tonight. Or at some point today. Who knows when. It needs to be done by Monday.

So this is all I have left to iron, less than 100 pieces, but it was late and I was tired (it was after midnight by then), so I gave up. Today. I swear. Sometime.

This box keeps getting fuller and fuller. More and more full. And yet I’m not ready to cut them out. I’m starting to panic on timing.

I will do what I can…it will hopefully get done. Along with everything else. Maybe I should just stop sleeping. Or hanging out with people. Or both!

Huh. Puppy.

He’s such a dork.

I keep forgetting to put this link in…this is the blogpost about the show I’m in at the Rose Gallery. I have to write it there, and I don’t want to write it twice…sorry. You will have to go to the link.

Anyway. Today I bust my butt to finish all the things, realizing fully that this will not happen.

*Flock of Seagulls, I Ran (So Far Away)

Whole Days Turn into Holes in My Mind*

Happy Thanksgiving y’all. I’m cranky as shit, didn’t get enough sleep, and have way too much to do, so I have to tell myself to slow down, calm down, let it go (don’t sing that damn song right now), and take a moment. I have too much to do as always and it’s messing with my equilibrium…not that I ever really have a good handle on that anyway.

I’m plodding along on all three holiday tasks: copyediting, grading shit, and making art. Usually in that order. I didn’t sleep well last night, so that’s not helping my current mood. Girlchild did make it to the boychild, which is why I have a few photos of him. We’ll see if they manage photos of the two of them. Together.

Last year, at this time, I was cutting out pieces to a quilt…I finished ironing a few days earlier. I thought I’d be at the cutting stage on this one by now, but no.

Sometimes these two get along…

Two more nights’ on this…a weird looped chain stitch below the eye and then a pistil stitch and cross stitch to fill in space on the right.

I usually do this after eating dinner, while I’m watching the rest of whatever 42-minute-long show is on for dinner.

Then to the ironing board (yes, this is at night…during the day, I brined a turkey, made rolls that look like poop emojis, copyedited, went to the store like a crazy person, and graded one assignment)…

These are condom wrappers. You know, like you put in all your art. (Access to birth control, ALL kinds)

Words. I use words a lot.

Rainbow DNA! Yes!

I did not clean up that pile last night. I got tired. I went in to read (you know, relax on vacation) and fell asleep with only 40 pages left in my book. Got up and went to bed instead and then couldn’t sleep. Sigh.

The box is getting full…

I keep squishing it down. I’ve been ironing pieces down for over a week now, and I have 16 1/2 hours in. I have about 200 pieces to go, I think. Maybe just under that.

So that’s less than two hours. Hopefully I’ll have some brain power later today to do that. Unlikely. Turkey day sucks your brain out (carbs plus alcohol plus eating in the middle of the day…not a good combo for me). I do have about an hour now before we have to leave for festivities…I could start now, but my adult brain is telling me to go grade something. Ugh. Stupid adult brain. Well I think there’s a movie on for tonight…Netflix says…so maybe I can grade then? We’ll see. I do have all tomorrow as well…but I’m just not as efficient on break as I am when I’m working a million hours a day. Strange that.

Anyway, I’m grateful for the time off, even if I’m buried in stuff. I’m grateful for the texts and pictures from my kids. I’m grateful for the guy that peed the dogs this morning. I’m grateful for that one goofy bird outside my window that’s making that funny chirp noise. I’m grateful for the quiet of my neighbors (this morning). I’m grateful that someone else is cooking today. I’m grateful that Thanksgiving is not at MY house, because then I would have had to clean instead of make art. I’m thankful for the walk we did last night with the dogs. I’m thankful for that gorgeous blue California autumn sky.

Peace out, y’all.

*K. Flay, Giver

Everything Looks Perfect from Far Away*

My efficiency was compromised yesterday by life. And my eyeballs. And the girlchild, who sobbed into the phone that she just wanted to come home. Well. That made me cry. I do miss the little fuckers. Big. They’re bigger than me. Anyway. I copyedited, I hiked, I ironed. That kinda sums up the day.

This is what copyediting looks like. Hallelujah for that raccoon, let me tell you. He makes me smile every time I look up. There’s a window above that and another one to the left. But I didn’t get as far as I wanted yesterday, because there was a girlchild incursion.

So I sent her lots of pictures of these guys. Although I couldn’t get both of them to sit picturesquely, dammit.

Then I did a 4-mile hike in the dark. It was a bit of a challenge, just because there were lots of rocks and no visibility. Yes, I had a headlamp, but I was having some issues seeing anyway.

But since it was in the 90s yesterday, at night was the only way I was gonna hike. So I’m in this hiking group, but they changed the rules to make it more active, so you have to go on one hike every 6 months to stay in the group. I begged the leader last year to leave me in, but I suspected I needed to do an actual hike with the group soon or I’d be booted. It’s just hard with my current schedule to find something I can do. After work is difficult…most of the hikes I would do are on the day I do tutoring, so it’s already a really long day.

So I went to the top of Black Mountain in the dark. Hence no good pictures. Four miles total…not bad for a Tuesday night.

Apparently she does this one all the time. I’d do it again…but I wouldn’t get there in time for after work. Too much traffic.

I came home and vegged a bit with this freak…

And girlchild FaceTimed again, now calmer and more decisive…this face is because she misses the dogs. Simba sucks at FaceTime.

I did iron last night…but not as much as I wanted to. Hikes tire me out. But there’s Midnight ironed down with her wings…

Damn I miss that cat. I made a mess again.

Got up early this morning to talk the girlchild through part of her drive to her brother…found the dog eating student warmups…luckily I’d already graded them.

Then made the dough for rolls (need to deal with those), plus brine for the turkey (mine is cooking Friday), talked to girlchild some more, talked to SIL, finally showered, my eyes are so tired right now, but I need to go make the rolls and then copyedit. Or go to the store (damn) or drop my book at the library. I graded a little bit this morning…I need to do more of that too. Ugh. And it’s dry and 95 degrees today. My body is rejecting all that. I want a nap.

What I really want is to FINISH everything. Yeah. Not happening. Gonna try to finish grading the one assignment, finish the first readthrough on the book, and iron all the pieces down (that might be a stretch). Today. TRY. I said TRY.

*The Postal Service, Such Great Heights

There’s Still Time to Change the Road You’re on*

So I spent a couple hours last night worrying about the girlchild, who was on lockdown in a dorm where a robbery took place at gunpoint. Because we need guns for protection, right? Because if anyone else in that dorm had possessed a gun, a whole lot of people would be injured or dead right now. As it is, everyone was fine, although I think both girlchild and I (and quite a few other parents and students) had the shakes for a while. But please don’t ever say to me that you have a right to carry a gun. Nope. You don’t. Not unless you’re a cop…and even then, I have misgivings because so many of our cops are racist and/or reactionary.

Anyway. That’s done.

I did some lazy daisies on the right that look like bull heads.

And then I ironed all those inner bits and pieces…here’s the layout for the heart and arteries…

And the pile of fabrics I went through last night…another 3 hours or so yesterday.

I’m up to 13 hours in the ironing…with about 400 pieces to go, I figure. It’s not been quick, that’s for sure. Here’s just one of the reds in the heart/arteries section…

Lots of pieces ready to be cut out.

And all the fabrics I’ve used so far…

I’ve been working to 1 AM and then falling into bed exhausted. The nighttime hours are better for this, I find. I did copyedit during the day yesterday…more of that today. I haven’t graded any assignments since Sunday, and I need to do some of that too. So I’m probably not going to finish the ironing today…can’t really blow off the moneymaking part of my week yet. I need to get significantly further along. I do have most of today (I’m hiking tonight), all of tomorrow, a few hours on Thanksgiving (mostly nighttime probably), and all of Friday. But I’m realizing it’s never enough. This quilt has to be done and photographed in less than 40 days. I can do that…but the copyediting has to be done in less time than that, and I have to deal with school. I can’t just push that off. Where do the hours go? Staring at fabric, I think. Mostly. And dealing with dogs. Stupid stuff like eating and peeing. I made lasagne from scratch yesterday…but that’s 3 more dinners on top of last night’s. So that was a good thing.

Sitting here watching a hummingbird on the flowers outside my office window…supposed to be in the 90s today. November, my ass.

OK, so shower, eat, copyedit. Consider venturing out for the chicken broth I should’ve bought on Sunday for the turkey I’m making for myself. Gotta make some rolls too. Should do that tomorrow…

Now get up and go.

*Led Zeppelin, Stairway to Heaven

I Wanna Be Your Left Hand Man*

I’m up! It’s morning! It’s a beautiful day! Can you tell that I have the next NINE days off work! I mean, as OFF work as you can be with 5 assignments to grade, a worksheet or two to finish creating, 140 pages of copyediting to do, and 1200 pieces to iron (OK, the last is a joy). So yeah, if you’re thinking, AWWW LUCKY, then you don’t really get that I bring home work almost every night and do these stupid 12-hour days sometimes and work every Sunday and sometimes Saturday as well. Honestly, you give teachers vacations so they don’t all quit their jobs and/or duct tape a particularly annoying child to a chair. Permanently. There’s a reason 50% of teachers quit by their 5-year anniversary.

With that said, I’m not copyediting or grading shit today…maybe tomorrow I’ll start. But I try to keep Saturdays free of that stuff.

This cat and people food…he’s got an issue…”I will stalk the plate crumbs.”

Two nights’ worth…chain stitch on the left top and then cross stitches. Maybe something else…can’t remember. I’m mostly just filling space.

Finally made it in to iron around 9 something. I did both sides…the landscape in the background. Although I have a little left to do on the right side. I’ve done about 150 pieces, that’s it. Not fast.

But I do love doing it…

I also love mornings where I can just sit here and text the kids back and forth while drinking my tea in my pajamas. It was nice.

This cat…she’s a bit psycho. I’ve been trying to persuade her to come back out into the living room and my office, where she used to hang out, but she’s nervous about the other cat…

She does love bathmats though.

Anyway, work, the good kind, is on my mind. Gonna do some art stuff today for sure. There’s a balance. I’m working on it.

*Vance Joy, Riptide

If I Kiss You Where It’s Sore*

Oh hallelujah dear Friday before Thanksgiving Break. Although today will be like managing wild and hungry chimpanzees while holding a chocolate birthday cake, I can see a big fat light at the end of the tunnel…at about 3:30 PM this afternoon, to be specific. Of course, I have 5 assignments to grade (not bad, actually), my author contacted me this morning and his manuscript is ready for copyediting (it’s OK…I asked for it over break…I need the money), and I just made a to-do list for all the shit around the house that needs doing, but hell…I just don’t care at the moment. I want to SLEEP…and most importantly…MAKE ART. Yes. That. With gay abandon. Throw confetti all over me. I wanna art myself into the ground.

Yes, I’m a little punchy and a lot exhausted.

Exhausted after doing this cool rock cycle lab all day, which started with teaching kids how to grate cheese (well, crayons) with a knife, in case they don’t have a cheese grater. Well, no, we were making sediment from a crayon rock.

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And then I missed photographing all the other steps in between because brain fart. Totally. But here it is after we compacted it and then melted it and then blended it and let it cool off.

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So lab days are always exhausting. But it was cool. I have no voice today, but that’s OK.

Then I went to the opening of California Fibers: Points of View at the Rose Gallery, Francis Parker School…there are my three pieces: Feeding Time, BirdWatch, and You Pollute Me. I look like I have a lot more energy than I really did.

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The show is really nice. I’ll post the whole thing sometime in the next few days. Not right now.

I came home after grabbing dinner and sat for a moment, trying to find the energy to do ANYTHING. I had Simba on one side of me and Satchemo on the other. My arms aren’t long enough to show both. No, I don’t need a selfie stick. It’s OK.

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And then, miracle of miracles, I came in the studio and put all the fabric away, cleaned up, and started ironing the new quilt. This thing is gonna be SO FUN.

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OK. Yeah. It’s huge. I get that. But I’m so excited about working on this. Really.

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I have my Nida Powers sign in here now. Although I really wanted it to be one word. I need to put it up on the wall, but I decided doing that on a rolling chair while tired would be a big fucking mistake.

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So I’ll wait. I will fully enjoy the 9 days off I have, even with all the shit I gotta do. It’s OK. I get to make lots of art in the middle of all that. Yay.

Regina Spektor, Better

We Don’t Notice Any Time Pass*

Insert pithy statement about being a middle-school teacher two days away from a week off from school. Make a Venn diagram about your feelings about the next two days versus break and your students’ feelings about the same. In your case, add in holiday stress because food, family, and travel. Then drop in some missing-your-kids feelings, because they are a million miles away. And take two Motrin for that headache that must be caused by something other than drinking heavily at night, because you didn’t.

I had plans for last night! I got about oh say maybe 45% into my plans and my brain and body gave out. So be it.

Somewhat strangely, on this day last year, I had just started ironing Wonder Under to fabric for my last quilt of 2016. Ironic that, because I did NOT start ironing last night, although that was my plan.

Here’s a puppy for you to look at, because he’s cute. He’s not actually a puppy. He’s over 2 years old. But he will probably always be the puppy because he’s small.

And hyper.

I did French knots on the righthand side to fill in some of the empty space in there.

Apparently empty space offends me. Actually, that might really be true.

I did manage to go shopping for background fabric yesterday, wash all the other things I bought (it was a weak moment), and then make piles of that and all the fabric from the last quilt that need to be put away.

So I guess there’s that, because I didn’t put any of it away. Or start ironing. In fact, I went to bed early, because I knew I’d have to be up early today for another ~~stupid~~ meeting. OK, they’re all stupid at the moment.

I couldn’t decide on a background fabric. I just knew I wanted it to be dark, and these are dark. So it will be one of them and then the other will get used for another quilt…or on the back of this one.

I wish I could say I’d get further along tonight, but I have an opening on the other side of town and it’s a lab day today (gonna melt crayons! in the name of science!), so the odds of my having any energy at all at the end of the day are decreasing rapidly. But I always have hope.

That’s how I get so much shit done. Hope. And crazyassness. Mostly the latter.

*The White Stripes, We’re Going to Be Friends

Anchored Down in Anchorage*

I’m feeling awesome because I’m three days ahead on the quilt! For now. Shhh. Don’t break the spell.

I had tutoring after school yesterday and taught a lot of one- and two-step equation-solving. Math…I used to be good at it, but now my brain freezes sometimes when trying to do it. I wonder if what I’m doing makes sense. I wonder if that’s because I don’t use it as much as when I was younger. I have to talk myself through solving a problem: I paid blah and he paid blah and we each owe half so without using an Excel spreadsheet, how do I figure that shit out? Ugh. I feel like quilting makes me Math all the time. Yesterday, I had to measure the drawing and figure out how much yardage I needed for the background. That’s math. I do have to draw it out, though, because I’m a visual learner. I don’t have a problem admitting that.

But first I graded more stuff, because that is the way of the teacher.

Some weird twisted chain stitch and some star stitches on the far right…

And then I cut for another hour, making it a total of 9 1/2 hours to cut out all those pieces. I started last Friday and now I’m done. Not bad.

I was tired and I knew I had to be up early for a meeting, so of course, I went ahead, grabbed all the boxes I needed, and started sorting Wonder Under…

There’s the requisite glass of wine, a boxful of pieces, and 14 boxes ready to go, all labeled with part numbers etc.

This is a new one for me. I don’t usually forget to write numbers on the pieces (then I can’t figure out where they go)…but I did it not once, but three times.

Sheesh. Brain dead much? It’s OK. It’ll be obvious what they are once I start ironing. It’s like the one kid who didn’t put her name on the test…if she’s the only one in that period, then it’s easy. It’s only if there’s more than one and they don’t have distinctive handwriting…then I’m fucked.

There they all are sorted. That took almost an hour. I wanted to quit about 300 times, but I persisted. As always.

So I can start ironing to fabric tonight? Well, first I have to clean up in here and put all the fabric away from the last one, plus I need a background fabric (hence the measuring and mathing from the night before). It’s on my calendar for after school. Looking forward to that. But first, I’m going to see what kind of chaos I can create in the classroom today (yikes…three days until vacation for the kids…this is where they turn into scary beasts, worse than a full moon). I can do this…

*Michelle Shocked, Anchorage (song note: I was born in Anchorage…some day I’ll go back)

So Take That Look out of Here*

My new oatmeal tastes funny. I couldn’t find the old stuff. Instant, but low carbs. I don’t need a million carbs for breakfast, but on a cold morning, a quick and easy oatmeal is nice. So the new one, ironically, being low carb, is way too sweet. I’m sure they’ve been uber-healthy and used some fruit juice or something, but blech. Yeah I’m a diabetic who doesn’t like sweet things. More irony. So I’m forcing myself to eat it because I need food and I hate wasting food (Hello Grandma…that’s you talking)…but yikes yuck blech.

Yesterday, my students started a new unit, so I got to draw…I know how meditative that is for me, but I was noticing how it worked for them on a Monday as well…just time to sit and color. To interact with the new content merely as pictures first. They were relatively calm for a Monday after a 3-day weekend…a Monday before getting a whole week off…

It didn’t take me all day to color it…I was done in 4th period…so I could grade stuff.

But then we had a 2-hour staff meeting afterwards, watching a video. The guy we were listening to was fine, although I don’t focus well at 3 PM on a Monday after teaching all day, so I had to draw to stay awake.

It was a long video…

I’m not disagreeing with the guy…I just think I’m already trying to do what he says. Not quite at the level he does, but I’m not sure I needed a video that long to get it. I fully understand the difference between equity and equality…there just aren’t enough hours in the day sometimes to do all the things teachers are supposed to do. Teach content. Take care of their basic needs. Give them the self esteem they’re lacking. Teach them the difference between their, there, and they’re. That one alone is a bastard.

I have no great insights after all that. But it makes me feel better about how I was trying to deal with the one kid a few weeks ago.

Home to the dogs and grading a couple of assignments (I’d really love to go into the week off with no grading…which is just about impossible)…Simba got his toy to stand up.

I did two nights’ worth on this…that weird chain-stitch R shape and some pistil stitches below it.

I don’t know why the dogs were so tired…they did nothing all day…

This one is really tired apparently.

I cut out another yard, the second to last one. I should have been more focused and finished, but I wasn’t. Tonight hopefully. Although I still have to grade.

Then I can sort and start ironing to fabrics…early! That’s a plus, for once. I’m looking forward to that part.

*Big Country, In a Big Country