Ironing Things in the Dirt Again…

Well today started at 4 AM as a 5-skittle morning, thanks to my blood sugar alarm. Better than Saturday night, when the alarm kept going off because (according to the guy on the phone) my antibodies were attacking the filament of the continuous glucose monitor and I would just need to wait it out OR the monitor was faulty and he’d send me a new one. Sounds like something my antibodies would do. I love that all my medical staff is trying to figure out why my body doesn’t do what they think it should…when I ask about the early AM crashes, they move things around, meds, when I take my insulin, etc, and damn if those crashes don’t keep happening. Fun times. Yes, I do keep skittles in a drawer next to the bed; don’t you? I’m down to one crash a week, which is…um…still annoying as fuck. But maybe we’ll figure it out. Maybe they’ll start doing more science on women and how their bodies are different than men’s (ha! Oh holy fuck, not for another…1243 days? Is that fucking right? And that RFK guy? He’s a scientific dearth of information. He doesn’t understand anything since the early 1980s, I think. He certainly doesn’t understand how the food pyramid works (that we don’t use anymore). Froot Loops at the top of the pyramid…YASSS, because we’re not supposed to eat a lot of the stuff at the top you dumbass and you’re not supposed to eat a lot of Froot Loops! We’re all gonna have brain worms at the end of this. If Biden or Obama had put a guy in charge of the Department of Health and Human Services that was this incompetent, the Repubs would have lost their fucking minds, but now they’re all for it. Crazy shit. Absolutely batshit. Go get your measles shot if you’re like me and only had one as a baby. I feel like that’s gonna be our downfall.

Anyway. This was an arty weekend, as well as being a weekend full of trying to get my work head on straight. I have a bunch of pictures from the Oceanside Museum of Art opening that I don’t have time to deal with today (maybe Wednesday), but we did go to that and I’m glad…it was really cool to talk to some people there. I also ironed things together…here’s Friday night…

Didn’t get far, because I also had to lay stuff out…here’s the first 100…

Laid out in groups of 10…check out the tiny bones on the bottom. And then I had all these that separated…

This is after I paired up a bunch of them…so I’ll figure this out as I go. I’ve already found about four of them, but also had to retrace another 10 or so, which is annoying. Ah well…this is what happens with tiny pieces. And one of them that I retraced, I found it in the next box, so sorting is also sometimes tiring and hard and I fuck it up. Fun times.

Saturday night’s ironing…

With a closeup…

So you can see the skeletal hand that will look way more awesome when it’s outlined in stitches so you can see all the bones. Some level of insanity there. Then last night’s ironing…

I’ve ironed about halfway through the 200s, I think? There’s a pile of stars to go on that flag, and then I start on the little people who are kneeling on the edge of the flag. This is not fast, but it is pretty rewarding, because it’s the first time I get to really see it in color, besides in my head. I really love the red African fabric I used in the volcanic bits…it shades from bright to dark and looks really good. Yes, fabric makes me happy.

I also spent a shitload of time trying to get my classes organized and the basic shit documented. I didn’t finish grading, because there were two harder assignments and I wanted to save those (aka, not grade all weekend). I did read all the kids’ surveys though, for the first time ever. This kid is a snarky one…

Also, so many of them want to not work at all this year or at any time in the future. So that bodes well for the country…not really; I don’t have huge expectations for 13-year-olds. Also the kids who don’t want to be scientists; they want to be engineers. Um. Hello. What do you think an engineer does? So amusing. I wish them all luck in their futures.

I finally finished appliqueing all the border flowers on Sue Spargo’s Homegrown…

Looks really cool. Now I have to spend the next two years embroidering them all. No really. I don’t think this will be fast. It’ll be amazing when it’s done, but it won’t be fast.

Saturday was hot (real feel 103 degrees), but I need to walk/hike on Saturdays or I can’t eat what I want for date-night dinner…and we were going up to the museum show, so I had to go at like 3 PM, which is earlier than I would normally hike anyway, but still hot. I headed for the hike that was closer to the mounting rain clouds, and I did have a breeze and eventually it cooled off a bit.

I only did 2 miles instead of 3 because of the heat, drinking water and dribbling it over my head the whole time. The Man almost texted me at some point because he heard thunder (I was already in the car on the way back) and thought I should get the fuck off the trail. Yeah. Nobody else was out there, for sure. It worked, though. And so that’s my thing for Saturdays, when I can pull it off. Go hike so you can eat stuff.

This is too true. The pendulum of shit they do care about makes no logical sense.

You care about our health, but you get rid of programs that feed children. I guess it’s OK if they starve as long as they’re healthy about it.

The Man took this picture of his bug-eating plants…with an actual bug NOT being eaten.

Impressive.

And here’s my sweet, very hot, very panty boy.

He’s been a pain at night (because he’s hot and then he makes me hot and then he pants and I can’t sleep through it). But he is a sweet baby.

Speaking of not being able to sleep through it, our baby owl is still here.

So the deal is that they squawk when they’re hungry, expecting mom/dad to provide, which they were a couple of weeks ago. I saw a parent deposit a mouse/rat/small rodent on top of the box for the baby (much squawking ensued), but last week, I saw the baby in the tree outside my office, squawking very loudly about catching their OWN rodent and tearing it to bits (predator birds are impressive in that way), so I know it can catch it’s own food. In the past, we had a pair of babies and then triplets, and the mom/dad chase them off at some point so they get the fuck out of the nest and go take care of themselves. They would still come back sometimes, but not sit on the box and squawk all night. This one is an only, and IDK if the parent is the problem, not chasing them off. We’re pretty sure last year’s parent died in the box (not sure why, but we had two skeletons and one was definitely adult-sized and one wasn’t). We never got a fledged one last year. Maybe someone poisoned the rodents? Who knows. So owls return to the same nests every year, pretty much, so maybe this is one of the previous babies as mom? And she’s enabling the SHIT out of this baby. I’ve heard her a couple of times in the last week or so, screeching away, and then the baby leaves for a while, but keeps coming back. Last night, it was gone for longer, so maybe we’re close to being a big bad adult owl, but it just cracks me up that some parents let their babies live at home and take care of them for so long…I joked that housing prices are so high in San Diego that the baby can’t afford to move out. Too true.

OK. School. Teaching about AI today…responsible uses of it and unacceptable uses of it. It’s not going away, so I’m going full disclosure and how you will fail my class if you use it to take a test. Fun stuff. Then a 2-hour staff meeting after (ugh) and book club tonight on a book I didn’t love. But ironing after. And I think it’s supposed to be cooler today. So that’s a plus. Real summer hasn’t hit yet. We’ll go over a hundred degrees for some time in the future. Not looking forward to it.

Totally Forgot…

Hmmm…there’s nothing like waking up on a Monday morning, getting ready for school, sitting down to the computer, and realizing there was something you were supposed to do over the weekend and you totally forgot about it. Oh yeah. I totally remember how school feels. Like that. Like this morning. Damn. It’ll be fine. Really. It will. There’s always tonight. Sigh. Even yesterday, I knew I had work, some work, and normally I would have done it in the afternoon, but I didn’t feel like succumbing to school on the weekend yet, so I didn’t do it until 8:30 PM. Not the best plan. Oh well. It’s done now. I will go write this other thing on the to-do list (which I made Friday and did not look at all weekend). Also, there’s nothing like food prepping a variety of breakfasts to get you through the next two months, and not wanting any of them when you get up in the morning. Score! Fun times.

OK, first full week of school with kids. Always a challenge. I think I mostly prepped today’s activity on Friday, which is good, because Advisory is only 6 minutes and I have to be on duty at 8:30 and I’m rolling late already. On Friday, I was amazing! I made it halfway to school before I remembered I hadn’t taken my insulin. OMG, yes, I had to turn around and drive back, so I didn’t have the day prepped, and first period suffered. I too suffered. I’m going to take my insulin right now. I used to take it at night and it was much easier to remember, for some reason. Morning brain foggy? Sure. That’s probably it.

I am still chugging along on the trimming…closer to done. Here’s Friday night, when we were going to go out to see a band, and that totally didn’t happen…

I can see some of the main figure pieces in there. Saturday night, I cut some more…

Saturday, we vacuumed the whole house, washed all the cat bedding, and I got the special pleasure of washing all the cats. Fleas. Ugh. The meds the Man was using were totally not effective. More meds are coming, but blech. It was a lot of work. So I’m glad Nova still loved me enough to sit with me. She made the most amazing yowling sounds during her bath. I think I started cutting out the flag there.

Sunday night, I’m definitely in all the little people and the gravestones.

And some veins and stuff from the main figure. I can see the bottom of the box, but I still think I’m two or three days away from done. I have almost 12 hours in at this point.

I went to ceramics on Sunday afternoon (hence part of the work chaos)…I need to get this part of the torso in the kiln, so I need it to stop breaking. Fuck me. Here’s me with everything laid out to reattach and reglaze.

Luckily, there was only one other person in there. She was spread out even more than I was. I have over 75 hours into this piece. Crazy. That’s the head in the front, under the plastic. I’m hoping to work on it today. But also to finish fixing things. I think there’s only one unattached thing right now (knock on wood), but some glazing needs to happen. Depends on how crowded it is. Hard to do with a lot of people around.

I did a little stitching down of things on Friday…with Nova’s droolio help.

I am really hoping to get these all stitched down soon. Too many other things to do. I delivered two quilts for a show up in Newport Beach on Sunday…the show opens September 12, but I can’t get there for the opening (it’s a Friday night…can we talk traffic?). So I cleaned those up, put a label on one, cut slats, packed them up, etc.

I hiked 3+ miles on Saturday…trying to make sure my blood sugar stays down for date night! And they moved the trail…

I hadn’t been here for a while and the entire middle section of the trail moved…not a little bit, but a lot. Weird. Maybe there was a sensitive environment over by the river that they were trying to protect? I could probably figure that out eventually.

This crazy ass caterpillar was in my yard this morning…it’s apparently a Rustic Sphinx moth…

Or it will be, if a bird doesn’t get it. It does seem like it’s ready to cocoon itself. Massive.

OK. School. I’m already getting texts this morning. Fun times. Teaching safety today. Then going to ceramics, then doing the work thing I forgot to do this weekend. I took pictures of all the kids and I need to put names on them. Ugh. It’s fine. I do it every year. It’s just time-consuming. Useful though. Helps me learn names and faces. Time to go. Get out of here. Go to school. No really, go.

Today We Color!

Well some cat just puked on my bag apparently. I’m staying in here; letting someone else deal with it. Too tired. Did not sleep well last night…too much noise, too much dog. We had kids for the first time yesterday…my first period was a shitshow (actually changing seating chart on day 2), but the rest were fine. I’m in my 23rd year of teaching (I officially started midyear in my first year, replacing someone who quit midyear…crazy, huh?), my 18th at this school, my 10th with this team. Nuts. Here we are…my team on top, the 8th-grade team below.

Yesterday was as exhausting as you would expect it to be. Today will be pretty chill. I think. Except for first period, which will still be a shitshow and kept me up repeatedly throughout the night. In between the dog barking and the owls and the coyotes and IDK WTF else. I should sleep well tonight anyway.

I’ve managed an hour or so of cutting things out each night…no grading yet, so that’s a plus. Although this weekend will be the first weekly email to send out. Joy. Here’s Wednesday night…

Again, looks a lot like Tuesday night….I’m in the 800s here, still mostly in the swamp with swamp things (ICE agents and kids mostly…an alligator).

Last night, I went to stitching with a friend, so I did some on the July Rooted block (Sue Spargo).

These are very relaxing to stitch, but it’s taken me forever to do all those fly stitches. And then I came home and cut stuff out for another hour…

I can see 700s and 600s now. Yes, I’m going mostly backwards. I’m in the main human figure now. I suspect I won’t be done until sometime next week. I’m hoping to be ironing together next weekend. Goals! Of course, that will be all standing after the first full week of school, all standing. Still watching the blood sugar. It was all over the map yesterday.

I love this guy and his medieval picture translations. I am one with this elephant.

I’m not really angry. I’m frustrated with some things. School hasn’t hit a particularly painful stage yet. Give me a week. Seriously, that’s all it will take. Now my government? Yeah, already frustrated, well beyond that honestly.

There’s a lot of not good people out there right now. Sigh.

Anyway, today we color! First cover page, very chill, but I will also be walking around, learning kids’ names, and taking their pictures. Fun times. I forgot to set up my classroom before I left last night (I had to be home to meet the tree guy), and my morning self is a little stressed about that. My afternoon self has to be the responsible one because morning self is a little out of it. Then I’m going to ceramics after school (still fixing things that break), and I think we’re going to see some music tonight, depending on how we feel. Then SLEEP. Oh joy. Maybe. I mean, the dog could bark as much as he did last night and I might get very little sleep again. But I won’t have to be up at 6:30 AM at least. And that’s a plus.

Remember Your Why!

Heyo. It’s halfway through…well, there’s one more prep day and then kids. That’s the hard part, although the first few days aren’t too bad…just a lot of talking. I could do without that. My voice could also do without it. I’ve actually enjoyed the last day and a bit in my classroom, because for the first year in a long time, I’m not panicking. I’m not unpacking everything out of a locked cabinet because they used my room over the summer, and I don’t have a lot of newbies to deal with, so I’m doing things that have waited for years. I moved some stuff in my room to be more logical. I put together a shelf thing I brought from home two years ago. I actually looked at the bulletin boards I never finished for 8th grade (I only looked at them; it’s OK). It’s been pretty chill. Hopefully that bodes well for the new year. Today I have a meeting and I need to copy stuff (the copier is not so chill, but that is always the case), but otherwise, I’m going to pilates. Yesterday I went to ceramics. Almost like a normal person. They let us sign up for afterschool duty for the first time ever, and I got an easy one. I never get an easy one…I’m always walking a long way because my classroom is closest to the front of the school, so I get the crappy duties, while other people waft through the easy ones for years. I get the same ones over and over again. But this year, I picked the easy one. I chose. I know, it’s silly, but let someone else do the light or the crosswalk or the bike rack. It’s time. I’m sure next year, I’ll get assigned something else, but the new principal wants to do things this way and I’m going with the flow. There are some things where I’m not going with the flow, in typical Kathy fashion. But whatever. I do my job and I do it pretty well most of the time. And when I don’t, it’s because I’m tired and burnt out. So yeah. Aiming away from that feeling this year.

Artwise, I haven’t had a ton of time each evening. Things like cooking and dishes…not so fun, but have to be done, ya know? And less time at home affects that. Always, it’s a bit of a shock to go back to the long days, although we are still in that sweet spot when I can come home and NOT work (well, I did on Monday). I can sit and read or stitch a little. Or go to the ceramics studio. I’m still breaking things on the torso. So frustrated with it at the moment, but I’ll get there. I’m building a crazy head for it though.

I’m gonna need room for the tree on the head though; it won’t fit on my shelf. Problematic. I’ll figure it out.

Monday’s staff meeting was long and mostly boring. Some new info, but they read the slides to us. And the ones they didn’t read to us were small and hard to read. But they won’t give us the slides until the end of the meeting, because they don’t want us on our computers. But there are still people on their computers. So I drew for the first hour or so.

I can’t just sit in meetings. My brain doesn’t work that way. It needs entertainment. This was good for that. The next hour or so, I read my book on my phone. I did listen. I heard most of the things. I just wasn’t particularly engaged. A lot of it is stuff I already know. It’s hard, because we have so many new teachers who know nothing but I don’t need to hear all that again, but we also have a new principal and some fairly new assistant principals who don’t know or remember how things work here. Like there’s a reason we don’t let kids in the hallway behind our classrooms. We used to and it was a behavior disaster. So now we have to deal with that again. Whatever. I won’t be responsible for the hallway; I already told them why. They can deal with it.

Certain parts of the quiltmaking process look the same every night. I mean, I can tell the difference, but when all I cut out are tiny pieces, the piles don’t change much in an hour. I think I’m in the 900s mostly? Going backwards…so not even halfway done. So here’s Monday night, right before I started cutting out the swamp trees.

And here’s last night, as I start cutting out the people in the swamp.

Still some swampy bits in the top bin, but there’s progress. I can see it. I’ll be here for a while though.

I’ve been stitching this stuff down all summer…in bits and pieces.

Most of the wool pieces are on…I think there’s a few more, but mostly I’m appliqueing cotton now. Which is maybe faster, IDK. And after they’re stitched down, they all need embroidery. I’ll be here for a long while.

We are back to one juvenile owl, I think. I could have sworn I heard a second, but I’m not seeing it, so I feel sorry for this lonely. It’s very loud.

That’s the moon, believe it or not.

It’s started flying around and squawking from other trees, so we are a few days to weeks out from it leaving. It’s weird how loud they are as babies and how mostly fucking silent they are as adults. They do squawk as adults, but it’s different and mostly threat related. And it’s usually just once, not all night. I apologize to the neighbors. A little.

OK, I have a morning meeting to deal with team stuff, plus meet a new teacher for some of our special needs kids. I get to ask why I have paraprofessional support in one class with only one kid who needs it when I have another class with six of them and no support (that actually goes over the 20% mark, so they will have to support in there…they just don’t know it yet). The email thread back and forth yesterday about one of the kids with the admin in charge of scheduling them ended badly. I’m just not going to sit and not say anything when what they’re doing is not best for the kids. Or me, for that matter, or honestly, the poor para who is sitting there with only one kid to help…which is fine if the kid needs that. I’m just curious if there was thought behind it, because last year, there wasn’t.

Then pilates after school…my body will appreciate that, even if my blood sugar doesn’t necessarily go along with it. Transitioning to school and stress and a different schedule has been interesting. I did very well yesterday. Let’s not talk about the other three days around it. It’s fun. My doc wants me to check in with a nurse once a month about the diabetes, and I’m like sure, here’s my first question about crashing sugar in the middle of the night (again). They have not called yet. Probably trying to decide which nurse will have to deal with me. I’m having positive results…I’m hoping to keep that going as school really goes. September is the best test of it…it’s usually absolute daily chaos. Then after that, I get to read and stitch and cut things out. Bliss. Remember your why! (teacher in joke)

Remember Fabric

Summer Break is officially over; ironically, summer in Southern California is just beginning (it was like 97 degrees yesterday). We’ve got at least two months of ugh weather, depending on how bad the apparently nonexistent climate change wants to make it. At least I’ll be in air conditioning during the day, right? With 140 kids. It’s fine. I’m totally not ready and had to be up at an ungodly hour this morning…it was early enough that the baby barn owl hadn’t gone to sleep yet.

It was light out by the time I got out of the shower. I’m not feeling positive about today. I know some people totally get into the first day back, they’re all hyped up. I’m an introvert. A million people in the mall (yes, we are meeting in a mall on the first day) is not my idea of fun. Honestly, talking to people at 7:30 in the morning is not my idea of fun. They give us popcorn and soda (can’t have those) and then the new guy posted all the treats he has for us, and I can’t have any of it…it’s either chocolate or sugar or both (I’m allergic to chocolate, if you didn’t know, and diabetic). So whatever. I already have the nutrition menu pulled up for our lunch options, so I know the carb issues. How does a salad have so many carbs in it? Sigh. And that doesn’t even count the dressing. So I bring my stitching with me for the morning part, and I have a book on my phone, snacks in my bag, ready to walk if the blood sugar alarm goes off. Wearing my new school year shirt (we had to go in early and pick one up). I’ll be OK next week when the kids come. Just not a fan of the adulting part (the part with the hundreds of adults). And I get to be one of the first people to talk at our meeting this afternoon. I actually don’t care about that part. It works OK after so many years of doing it. Get up in front of a hundred people and talk? Whoopdidoo. Got it.

Here’s baby owl and a parent…

I’ve had a hard time being in the studio the last few days. Kitten is supposed to be in here. When she was an actual kitten, she was in here…

That’s my old office chair. I’m three chairs past that one now, I think. They’re always covered in cat fur though. Already just hanging out with me. Sigh. Poor baby. Miss her. Maybe I’m the poor baby in this equation.

So I spent a bunch of time futzing with Spargo stuff in the living room yesterday instead. I still have a million things to stitch onto the borders of Homegrown…

And then all the embroidery. I then checked on some of the other in-progress Spargos and cut out pieces for another month of the mushroom one (just finished a mushroom book…seemed appropriate), reminded myself I was close to done on one of the forest blocks, and remembered that the critter blocks are next on the embroidery list when I finish the Rooted trees…think I’m on June or July with that one, so another three? I think. I appreciate the brainlessness of following someone else’s pattern sometimes.

I did iron in here: two hours yesterday and two and a half the day before. I know it’s hard for you to see the difference between the days, but I can. Here’s Wednesday night’s progress…

Made it through all the swamp trees and maybe a little past that…looks like there’s two rockets in there.

Then yesterday…

I did all the space stuff…well the ‘sky’ stuff, which is the big blue and purple pieces you see, but not the planets and stars and sun…that’s all that’s left. About 100 pieces. Complicated because I try to decide what each planet looks like in terms of color, but not super hard like all the people pieces. I should be able to finish tonight and then start cutting them out. A good part of the process for the start of the school year…sitting on the couch and bingewatching a show the Man is calling “Call of the Midwife in India”, which it kind of is: The Good Karma Hospital. Light fare, but about helping people, certainly, which is what I need right now.

I was reading a book by T. Kingfisher, one of her shorter soldier series based on old stories (I liked the second better than the first, which was based on House of Usher)…and she wrote…

That’s definitely from the second one. They are definitely dark. And in the acknowledgements, even better…

I’m amused by that. The first is What Moves the Dead; the second book, which both of these quotes are from, is What Feasts at Night. The third comes out this fall.

When it’s hot, cats flop.

Nova makes biscuits. It’s adorable. Bowie is less adorable, but I still like him.

OK, damn, I have to leave in 15 minutes. Ugh. I did make it to ceramics on Wednesday, but it was packed, so instead of trying to get the big torso out, I worked on the head.

This thing will never be done.

And as we go back into the school year, one run by AI apparently (even in my district, they are pushing it)…see in June, when school gets out, what happens to the graph?

I am so amused. And not. Ah well.

OK. Back to the crowd in my head and my personal space. Remember to keep fabric at the forefront. Remember Kitten. Finish ironing tonight. All good.

Still Down With It

OK. So I’ve been sick with COVID since Sunday night, apparently (sorry to my plane mates…I didn’t know). Yeah, I should have been masked, although I’m not sure where the girlchild and I both got sick. Hoping today is fever free. I am better…the first few days were very low energy and sleepy. I’m definitely increasing in energy, but was still running fevers yesterday on and off. I’ve canceled/rescheduled the dentist, exercise, lunch, not sure what else. I was planning on getting a booster shot this week, before going back to school. Oh well. Interestingly, the last time I tested positive, I had almost no symptoms. Not so much this time. Lots of sleeping and reading going on, and when I felt more energetic, I started appliqueing wool bits down to the borders of Sue Spargo’s Homegrown.

It’s mindboggling how long this takes.

Once I had tested for COVID, I moved into the girlchild’s room and my office, trying to limit the other people in the house from exposure. Hoping I wasn’t too late. It didn’t even cross my mind when I first started feeling sick. Silly really. The Man starts his new job on Monday and we’re hoping he doesn’t come down with it.

I’ve stitched down all the stuff on the top and bottom borders; I’m doing the side borders now.

Five flowers a side. Big ones. Time-consuming. Not hard though, which is good, because my brain is mostly nonfunctional. Amusingly, I’m also doing my district/state-mandated online trainings today, with about half my brain. Seriously, I’ve experienced over 20 years of integrated pest management and bloodborne pathogen trainings. The assessments are often stupid, making you memorize things that are not useful, like how big an opening a mouse needs to get in a building (all of them were small; you literally had to memorize which small thing they had mentioned in 28 minutes). I’m not saying we don’t need to know these things…it’s just a lot of minutiae.

Back to the stitching…there’s about 85 pieces that need to be appliqued down on the two side borders, and I probably have spent 8 hours so far. Not all of it this week…

Last night, I had Simba on the bed (past his bedtime) and Bowie coming to visit.

I kicked Bowie out later because he keeps climbing on shit and knocking things over.

Sleepy boy.

So I still have a ton of those to stitch down if I need more down time, which I probably do. I’d like to be energetic and well enough to stand in here (I’m in the office right now) and iron things to fabric…the thing I started before I went to San Francisco. I’d also like to have enough energy to go to ceramics, because it’s been a while and I’m worried about my piece. Not much I can do about it at the moment. I’ve had to move a bunch of stuff to next week that was supposed to happen this week, so it’s all of a sudden more full than I like. It is what it is, I guess. It’s now officially August and I have to think about school. Total mindset flip.

Meanwhile, the cats are all exhausted.

And hot…

Kind of with them.

There’s this…

No hubs but…and this is a joke, but I’d rather spend time making art, thanks.

OK, back to mandated reporter videos. I would like to thank them for making up a new complicated story for each year. Just watching this set of videos is traumatic. And having reported more than once, it’s too bad that humans can’t be better across the board. I have one anonymous card that I’ve kept for three years now. I do often wonder about that child and how they’re doing (multiple reports, police were involved, they sent the kid home with parents). Ah yes. And watching this training while thinking about the current government and the Epstein files? WTF. There’s a gap there that cannot be explained.

Sigh. Hopefully no fever today so I can be a little more active…starting tomorrow, I can be out of the house if I have no fever, although I need to track down a mask. Pretty sure there’s one in a purse or bag somewhere, or maybe in the car. I have a million at school…ironically. My gym bag? I’m glad I had enough books and brainless stitching lying around to entertain me, and furry beasts to provide sighs, boofs, and love. And someone to go out and buy more meds and food. Not that food is very exciting at the moment. I’m doing a lot of revising what I eat to get blood sugar to behave (hard when you’re sick). The CGM has been really helpful and I’m glad I finally agreed to it. Insurance is covering it completely, and if I keep up how I’ve been doing, my A1C will be coming down in the next three months. All good. Art. Health. Balance.

Kick Them Out…

Summer is the time for all the doctor stuff. I am squeezing in three appointments this week and two next week. Pro: I got the tooth pain hopefully taken care of this morning with a root canale (been dealing with that on and off for a year) and got rid of an early morning ultrasound (fasting before school; torture). I’m doing the best I can with this aging body. I have a team of specialists trying to help. I just need one to drop off meals! Is that a thing? OK, I know people can cook for me but it’s completely outside of my means and not required. I’m just tired of trying new things and having them taste blech or react badly with my digestive system or just make me feel crappy. Working on it.

I might be done dye painting for this time around. I need to type up a document for myself so the next time I do it, everything I need to know will be in one place. I painted two more at home here, but won’t have time to do any more, and I’m pretty sure the dyes are wearing out. We’ll see when I wash these two out…here’s the first one…

I think a lot of the vibrancy will wash out, but it will still be cool. I set up a table in the driveway in the shade, no wind, very nice.

That said, my table is ancient, water-damaged, and heavy as hell. I should replace it with one of those fold-up plastic tables, yeah? First need to find somewhere to dispose of this beast, which is probably 25+ years old.

Then I spent 2 hours painting this one…

Crazy. We’ll see what it looks like. It’s the biggest one I’ve done.

Then I sorted the first 100 pieces, after cleaning up the studio and moving Kitten’s stuff around.

She’s almost 17…and much slower.

Bowie doesn’t leave her alone, so I moved her food and litter tray into here, the smallest room in the house (besides the bathrooms), where I have the most shit, but I can close the door against the teenager who wants to bug her. I can’t get to a chunk of my fabric at the moment unless I move that really old chair with her on it. Sigh. It’s fine. I’m working around her. She’s peacefully sleeping most of the time.

A lot of the Wonder Under was releasing this time, so I have this lovely selection of web that belongs to a piece somewhere.

I started ironing last night…

Dirt and rocks and a little bit of grass under the gravestones.

I also managed to make my Quilt National artist talk video (only 4 tries to get it under time without my staring off into space because I’ve forgotten the plot multiple times). Today, I need to clean up the dye stuff, wash out those two, and pack for leaving tomorrow midday. San Francisco is like 20 degrees cooler than here, so packing is intriguing. Plus two days in hot. It’ll be fine. I’m actually really looking forward to all the art stuff. And the kid. She’s cool, mostly fun to hang with. She probably says the same about me.

I finished one tree at the residency (during Zooms) and started this one. I’ve worked on it a little this week.

I think there are only three left. This is my post-dinner, still watching our show stitching, assuming I don’t need to jump on the stationary bike because my blood sugar is blowing up. Really fun times.

This concerns me. As I age and my partner and parents age…

I’m not worried about 99.9% of the undocumented, except making sure they have food and healthcare and their kids are in school and OK. I realize that makes me woke or liberal or an activist. OK then. I am all those things, because I care about people I don’t even know. And I know that ICE is trying to deport people that we need here. And they’re not qualified, most of them, to do the job they’re doing, as evidenced (evidence y’all!) by their trying to deport children and US citizens and people with green cards who have committed no crimes. Who pay taxes. Dumbassery. But cancer…damn, not paying attention to that? That’s gonna fuck all of us up. Even MAGA. Even Republicans. Maybe especially them because they’re so busy saying it’s the undocumented immigrants causing all their problems that they don’t have time to go to the doctor for those weird symptoms that are actually cancer.

My dad and I had a conversation about socialism the other day. Because what we do here in California is not socialism…it’s capitalism. It’s just capitalism with some empathy for the not-rich, not-white, not-man. Some. Not enough. Ask the mentally ill. Because they don’t get what they need.

Anyway. Sigh. Politics. Always. It’s hard to get away from it. OK. Wash out dye paintings. Clean up dyes. Eat lunch (mouth is still numb; they said an hour, ha! Not even). Talk to diabetes dietician on video call. Go to pilates. Pack. Probably need to do laundry again to do that. Then iron some more. Maybe buy some snacks for travel. Maybe not. When is TSA gonna get rid of the no-liquids over 3 ounces rule? OK great, I can wear my summer flipflops through TSA again instead of going barefoot (that’s a plus), but I want to bring my tea and water without having to search out a drinking fountain and wait in line in a super-expensive drinks line. Maybe that will make me stop wanting the Epstein files released (it won’t…but they can try). By the way, in case it was ever unclear, I think everyone on the Epstein list should be removed from government. EVERYONE. Don’t care how important they are, don’t care what their politics are. Kick them out.

A Thought

Sure I’m never gonna have just one thought. My brain works way too fast in a branching psychosis that may be helpful in some situations, but sometimes ties neurons up in knots and creates flailingness. I’ve been working on art stuff most days for about 4-6 hours on and off, depending on the state of my brain. I should be able to work for 12 hours, right? I do know that pre-COVID, I would spend 6-8 hours on a break day or a Saturday, just working on one piece…but that’s a known process, it’s ironing all the pieces to fabric, it’s cutting things out…the idea already exists, the process is something I’ve done for years. This? Is not. This is fucking around with new ways of making. New ways of thinking and working. Somewhat exhausting. GOOD, but definitely the neurons needs breaks.

Here’s my thought. And it’s one I’ve had before but it is just being reinforced by this week away. I need to do this full time. Well…I first was going to type “more”… but full time is the reality. Nope, the reality is that I can’t afford full time right now. I’m watching a webinar right now where I know these artists are full time…and I don’t know HOW (retired? Partner supports? Independently wealthy?). I am none of those things. I am aiming for the first. The other two are out of reach. That said, I can do more. I think. I say that and then school punches me in the face. Imma punch back this year.

SO. I just posted all these pictures in order of when they were taken using the ancient iPad, and that’s not how I usually write. I usually do it more thematically, but I don’t want to waste two hours like I did Wednesday. So it’s gonna be that way.

The dye paintings have to sit MOIST and DAMP for 24 hours, so I make piles of them in cut-up and taped plastic bags with the dates/times written on them that I painted them, and then I wash them out as I go, more than 24 hours later. I knew that peach would get less orange, but I love that the blue stayed so blue. I love the top one…the bottom one I also love, but it will need some handwork, I think.

I’m trying things out here. On the one hand, I like the thin line I get with the tiny applicator, but it’s hard to draw with on fabric. The thicker ones are easier, but bleed more. But I also want to mess with just color and dye. So this is all trying stuff out.

Scrub jay. It’s loud and visits every evening. Last night, they brought a friend.

I forgot to take a picture of this piece before I covered it; the thin lines dry out really fast and it was in the afternoon, so it was warm and windy and I was afraid it would dry out too much and not set. And I haven’t washed it out yet…so I don’t know whether it set or not. That’s on my list for this afternoon.

Here’s the other line one I did that WAS washed out, although it needs more washout with Synthrapol…there’s a shadow as I let it dry. Obviously, these need color. Or maybe not. I think they do.

I have fabric paints and pencils and pens and a whole host of shit I brought and am not going to get to try. I overplanned. Wait, I always do that. It’s not a surprise. The Man is coming to visit today through tomorrow, and I’m going to send some stuff home with him, because I’m either done with it (threadpainting) or I’m not going to get to it (ceramics, probably paints & pens & pencils…still thinking about that). Once he leaves, I don’t have much time left anyway…just Saturday afternoon and evening. Sunday is mostly packing and cleaning.

This one…I love this one. I outlined with a thin brush, not the applicator. Still a pain, but less than the applicator. Then painted. The color, the orange, a lot will wash out. but I still love this.

Once you mix the dye paste, it’s hard to know how long it will last. One book says 5 days; the other says “keep track as you work so you know”. Um. Well. This was yesterday morning, and I mixed all the dye paste on Monday (took forever because of the wind). I think today is day 5. I still have a bunch of paste left, though, so I might just keep going and assume they’ll get more pastel with time? It really is just a matter of how much of it washes out. I have a shit ton more fabric. And a lot less wind at home. And a few days off before school starts. Actually, there are a million doc appointments in three days, and then I leave for San Francisco and the girlchild and more looking at art. I love this for me!

I read Christopher Moore’s new book, Anima Rising. It was great. Lots of art and cultural and literary references.

I love Sedna.

This is either the same alligator lizard that was on the door or another one (I think it’s a bigger one, honestly). NATURE!

Luckily, this one was outside. With the snake and the squirrel and the fox and the ravens and the owl. But NOT the spiders. I’ve killed 5 so far, 4 of them giant ugly grass spiders who survive multiple shoe whacks, and one bit me while I was asleep (not the grass spider; something smaller and bitier)…on my NECK. Freaked out by that. And yet, I continue to walk around barefoot. I did leave out the spider-killing shoe though…as a warning?

I was on two Zooms yesterday, one where an artist explained how she bought a church and remodeled it to be living space and studio (not happening here in San Diego…Susan Lenz, in case you’re interested) and one was my local SAQA meeting, with a presentation by another artist (Angela Jean). Both were interesting, but I couldn’t focus on anything else, so I embroidered the…is this June?…block of Sue Spargo’s Rooted. Finished this one…

And started July. Here’s the setup where I’m working on the female figure. I thought I might work on that, but apparently the brain can’t listen with intent AND make art with intent.

I need to edit some of these photos, but I might have to go back to the iPad for that, OR leave them be. Frustrating process. Not sure why I can’t do it on the app here.

Here are these two washed out. I love the top one. The brown washed out but still looks great. I can quilt this and it’s done. The bottom one…well, I loved it when I painted it, but I used the thicker bottle applicators and it bled like crazy…which doesn’t work for this. I’ll have to decide whether to fix it somehow? Or chalk it up to practice and make a cat blanket.

This one I think will wash out well…the browns have a lot more colors in them that will show up after the washout. I had a plan, but then accidentally dropped dye in some places I didn’t originally have dye…

A learning experience. I did this one last night. It was dry and the wind kept picking up randomly. There were storm clouds floating around, but nothing stuck…until the 5 seconds of rain at midnight or so.

I just take lots of sky pictures…weird for someone who isn’t really a landscape artist. The sky is way more complicated in person.

In the afternoon and evening, I worked on this. OMG this is so time consuming. I guess I didn’t come up here to find faster ways to make art. This is with 9 hours in.

I get one section pinned and then stitch it all down (by hand…that may be part of the issue, but hand stitching doesn’t make things as flat as machine, and that’s what I want). I had to add another section to the bottom to accommodate the feet. I still need to work on the lower legs and then the arms, and goodness, she might need a head. So it’s not getting done here. But I like it. It needs a lot more. Also, I so did not need to bring two giant boxes of fabric for this. But I ran out of time to edit fabrics.

So yesterday was business day 6 of not hearing back on the boob biopsy. I called in the morning and they said all the things, I found out that my doc IS on vacation this week (she’s allowed), and I asked for the sub doc to call back or something. The nice man (who is a man and maybe doesn’t understand boob anxiety) said “oh I’ll send a message and they’ll answer in another 3-5 business days”. OMFG. I explained that I’d already waited that long. I have an appointment with my doc next Tuesday anyway, but I really don’t want to wait another however many business days to hear. Did I hear yesterday? Nope. Nothing. Kept my phone on all day, nothing but fire warnings. SIGH FUCKING SIGH. So this morning, I wake up, slowly, and I check my email while trying to get functional enough to do another dye painting, and Sharp sent an email that new test results were released, check the app, and my heart races until I get the app opened…and there’s nothing. No new results. No letter. No message. Nothing. Fuckers.

So I painted this.

The wind picked up, but I think I got my point across. It’s not even the correct boob, but I don’t care. And then I sat through an art webinar that told me I needed to quit my job and make art full time. Ha! It didn’t actually SAY that; I just thought it afterwards.

OK. So I’m still boob anxious. Betting that doesn’t change today. I need a walk, I think. I need to wash out like three things? I think. Maybe two. I have a meet and greet tonight with the other people here. Need to bring an example of my work. Ha! I need to clean up and organize a bit so the Man has a place to sit. I need to work on the lower legs of that other piece. Oh shit, I drew last night too…apparently that picture didn’t come over. Let me see if I can do it on the phone (how many devices do I need to post one thing???).

Answer: three devices, because two of them suck. Well, they all suck in some way, or I wouldn’t need more than one. Original post started on ancient iPad, added most photos there. Saved draft. Typed most of words on laptop. I am old school. I am also old. It’s just easier to type with a real keyboard than hunt and peck. Edited photos and added the drawing photo on the phone…too small for typing.

Walk, then eat lunch, read book, then clean up. Wait. Check Find My app to see if the Man left already. Nope, he’s in the bedroom (scary, huh? He’s actually probably in the bathroom.). So I have at least 90 minutes before he gets here. Then wash out any dye painting that’s more than 24 hours out. Then do other things. Art things. Maybe talk to a human today. I haven’t in a few days. Except on Zoom and the phone with Sharp. OK. Do the things.

Take the Legs…

Hello from Temecula still…it’s not far from home, but it’s far enough. I wished yesterday for my ironing board, but survived without it. I forgot Q-tips, but someone had left some. I might leave the center today to buy some stuff…or I might not. I’m feeling like town would be a shock to my system. So do I really need the stuff on my list? Probably nots.

Things I’m realizing so far: I hate rethreading my machine. It’s not hard. I just don’t like to do it. On this thread painting, I rethreaded it at least 25 times. No 35. Too many (for me).

She needs a base to live on…not sure what that looks like, but I’ll figure it out. Maybe when I get back.

I made about 14 dye paste colors, then painted one Monday night…

I think a lot of the orange will wash out, but we’ll see. I will be washing that one out after writing this and watching the SAQA Textile Talk about art communities. I will be washing Tuesday morning’s piece too…

Dye is nuts because it has to stay damp for 24 hours and then you still don’t know what it’ll look like. I’m embracing that. (Update: it’s taken over two hours to try to get this post to publish even as a draft…the iPad is old and apparently couldn’t handle it any more…so I’ve washed both out…I’ll post pics of those once they’re dry. I’ve also spent the last two hours listening to sirens going by; there’s a fire about 10 miles east of us that ballooned up to 200 acres. It’s moving away from us, but I did walk up to see the smoke–I’m down behind a hill–and was distracted by the Watch Duty app and evacuation warnings. None here…)

I did a black outline piece Tuesday evening, but the wind kept popping up and I didn’t want it to dry, so I didn’t even take a picture of it.

Finding places to store these is getting problematic as they get bigger. Now I’m just stacking them under that table, but the oldest ones are on the bottom…which is only an issue if I’m being systematic about washing them out. I want to see what they’re gonna look like. Am I wasting time on these? No because it was something I wanted to try.

Trying to beat the wind, I got up a little early this morning. I went to bed early but then had a blood sugar issue and didn’t get back to sleep until late. I might need a nap later. This one has a lot of color, and I used the dye bottles to draw.

I can’t say it’s easy to do and the dye paste might be a little runny, but I wanted to try.

This one I started because the wind hadn’t picked up yet, so I decided to try a small one with brushes instead of the bottles. The first one I did was all brushes too.

The dye paste mix is apparently good through Friday, so hoping for two or three more a day.

I also pieced a background for a more free form piece I’ll be working on today…I think.

I have a limited amount of non white fabric (I have a shit ton of that)…wait, not true. I have a lot of crazy-quilt-type fabric with me, but wanted a cotton base to build on.

This is where I wanted an ironing board… but I figured it out. I have a small pad, but it was hard to get this done. It’s still not flat but there’s gonna be stuff on top, so it won’t matter. I’m very cavalier about flatness. A lot of it quilts out, thank goodness, because I am not a master piecer.

There was a sunset meet and greet, although only two of us showed up. We had a good conversation though.

It’s really hazy up here, apparently still from wildfire. Little ones keep popping up, but nothing I can see from here, thankfully. I have my phone on in case my biopsy results come in…pretty sure my doc is on vacation unfortunately. I may call if I haven’t heard by tomorrow. Today is 5 business days. Stressful. So the phone keeps chiming in with fire notifications instead. I did not realize the original arts community up here burned back in 2004…so this is the rebuild. So it’s a good idea to keep the phone on.

In the evening, I like to sit and cut things out or stitch. I finished all the Wonder Under on Monday night…

7 1/2 hours. It’ll have to wait until I get home to get sorted and ironed to fabric.

Then last night, I pulled out the embroidery threads and that black and white improv quilt I finished last week and started working on it.

I don’t really have a plan, which is fine. I’m going to be here for a while (here being handstitching on this piece).

Ok, some random things…I brought way too many clothes for someone who was gonna spend 50% of their time in one set of barely acceptable dyeing clothes.

On Monday night, a huge spider (ok my Australian readers will laugh at my idea of huge, but a lot of ours are poisonous too, so bear with me) ran across the floor into the pile of stuff I brought and I got up and halfheartedly looked for it, but figured it would just stay out there. Until I went to get ready for bed, and faithful readers, either there are TWO of them or that fucker followed me into the damn bathroom. Big and stalky. Nope uh uh. Got a shoe and waited for it to get out of a corner and whacked it 5 times before it succumbed. Flushed its body but there were three legs I couldn’t deal with…too creeped out, so I left them. Next morning, two legs were gone. This place has ants….not horrendous but enough that you don’t leave your dishes out, and those annoying bastards had taken the two legs for me. By this morning, they took the last one. I feel more friendly toward the ants now. Also there better not be another giant spider in the house. I killed a big red ant and a smaller spider, and then there was this guy…

I called it “Sir” about 10 times before persuading it to leap from the door.

I was going to go run errands, but none of them are desperate. Fire makes me anxious. Plus I haven’t gotten much done (besides dye painting two things, washing out two others, watching an art zoom, and trying to write this beast…way easier on a computer than the iPad, for sure. I need a new one. It’s ancient.) and I feel sort of reluctant to go anywhere. I’d have to put a bra on probably. And fight all those fire engines to get out (not really, but I’d rather stay out of their way).

OK. Rest of the day? (Note to nosy self: bring binoculars next time you’re on a hill.) Start freeform placing the figure on the pieced base. That’s all I’ve got. Brain is tired. I have lots I can work on…not worried about that. Play some music to drown out the sirens…that damn fire app will tell me if there’s an issue, but the fire is definitely moving east, away from us. Drink more tea.

On Time Is What I Say It Is…

Oh yeah. Again. Lost days. I can’t remember WHY yesterday was a lost day, but it was. It wasn’t. I did things. I might not remember what I did, but I did things.

The current quilt: I’m trimming Wonder Under…

It’s remarkably slow.

I’ve made it halfway as of last night…

And it’s taken almost 5 hours. There’s two more yards to cut out. Just a lot of smaller complicated pieces. I won’t finish before I go on my residency. I’ll probably take the remainder with me, just as brainless filler. Along with other things. All the things.

I met with friends on Thursday and did some stitching on this…

I worked on it last night too, and it’s almost done. I’m taking it with me next week too. Like I said; I’m taking everything. Just moving the whole stash up to the cottage and then bringing it all back. Not really. But it kinda feels that way.

I thought I had finished all this until I was packing it up and realized the gun on the tank is not glazed.

In reality, I’m gone for a week and we’ll see where it’s at when I get back. This hand has broken off more times than I can say…it’s slightly lower than the board and the board doesn’t fully support it.

Stupidity on my part. Hopefully it will survive the next week. I am taking some clay with me…one thing that’s formed that I started carving into like three months ago. Another slab of clay to make something else to carve. I need to make the wet box today for that.

The girlchild is here for a long weekend. She cooked us dinner last night, but there is always time for Simba.

He likes it.

I screenshot this because I like it…

I actually have been trying not to use the word beautiful to describe people or smiles or eyes or hair or whatever. I’m not perfect at that though. But yeah, beautiful is not something I’ve ever been…and I’m OK with that. Or pretty honestly. And right now, I have another hole in my boob and an allergic rash from the adhesive patch and a scratch from Kitten. Oh, and acne at age 58! Ah well. I forgot to wash my face one night. So there we are.

Today. Today is packing and organizing and trying to be ready to leave tomorrow. Plus an art opening down in San Ysidro. And getting the office ready so Kitten can be in here without my carrying her out to the litter tray and food 5 times a day (yes, that is what I am doing at the moment.). Hopefully next week, I’ll be able to get lots of fun things done. And maybe blog on time (it’s my schedule, so it’s on time is what I say it is.). And maybe just be an artist for a week. I food prepped yesterday to help with that. I don’t need to think about what food; I just need food. Yeah. Looking forward to this, even though I am also anxious about it. That’s how the brain works. Art brain is racing forwards and the rest of my brain is trying to make sure there’s enough fabric. And it’s scoured. Crazy, right?