Mismatched Shoes…

Someone at work yesterday was like, “only 11 more days” and I’m thinking, wait, what? Oh…they’re counting. Shit, I’m not counting. Why? Because I’m in day-to-day mode and if I start counting, I’m gonna panic about I’m not planned out through those 11 days. Easy for him…he’s not a teacher and doesn’t have to make sure kids have relevant and appropriate work to do. Considering actually just NOT teaching and just showing World Cup highlights every day, since that’s all some of them want. Yesterday’s Costa Rican goal against Germany (the first one) was pretty awesome by the way, if you want to see some actual soccer teamwork. That said, the arguments I’ve had to have with kids who HAVE to watch, YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW IMPORTANT THIS IS (oh yeah? everyone in my household has played soccer…the question is, do we go for Wales, England, or the USA…mostly moot points by now). Sigh. I liked it better when the World Cup was at the end of the school year, because then you could just pop it up at the end of class and it didn’t matter as much. Right now? With only three weeks between breaks and progress reports due like the week after we come back? Yeah no. I don’t have the time. Or the patience. I may have totally given up by the end of the school year, so it would be nice to have the World Cup to fall back on. Ah well. I’m sure something else will come up.

I’m glad it’s Friday. I have next week mostly planned. I’m stalled by one thing that I should just get over and walk away from, because it’s gonna be complicated and take too much time. Maybe next year. Just write a note to next year’s Kathy and tell her to try it then. There’s enough new shit this year. I don’t need to make it harder on myself than it already is.

Ugh. I have a meeting this morning. I will get through the day. I know I’m frustrated and overwhelmed and it’s making me emotional. And I’m tired. All good things, yeah? I admit that I don’t love most of my job right now. There are moments of awesome and even OK and then there’s some shit. I need less of the shit.

I am done ironing on the newest quilt though…I got there on Wednesday night finally…here’s all the fabrics I used in the piece…

Usually I count them…I don’t have time this morning. It’s a lot but not as many as some. There’s a lot of white/gray fabrics…there were a bunch of concrete building things and then a ton of plastic…

That was water bottles and plastic bags and milk jugs.

All the pieces ready for trimming…

And last night, I started trimming…

Doesn’t look like much, but that’s a lot of the water bottles and a little over an hour of cutting. This week, so far, I’ve managed 7 hours of art stuff since Saturday. The week before, it was over 15 hours, but that’s because I wasn’t going to work, so I got bigger chunks of time. My left eye is twitching, my left knee is still in pain (doc next week), and I just realized the other night that I’ve been wearing mismatched shoes. I bought the same shoes two years in a row, and I was wearing one of the old pair and one of the new…only figured it out because the inserts are different colors. Sweet jesus. No, it doesn’t explain the knee pain. Unfortunately. That would be an easier fix than what I think it will be.

I am down. I feel down. I have a quilt guild holiday party tomorrow that will hopefully lift my mood. I’m hoping to go to an art opening in the afternoon. We’ll see about that. Maybe just getting a break from the behaviors will help. I think if I can get some of the stuff off my to-do list for school and home (gotta mail a holiday package, which means 17 things have to happen before that), then maybe I’ll feel better. Or I could just curl up with a book (the current one is not that good, unfortunately) and shut out the rest of it…I’ve been doing that a little every night, honestly. Ugh. Deep breaths…it’s Friday and that’s a good thing. And I should just throw out the other pair of shoes (ugh, into a landfill?) because they are beat up and that’s why I stopped wearing them and bought a new pair. OK. Gotta go. Meeting time.

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