Sweetness I Was Only Joking*

Well. For some reason, lots of people are coming to read the blog. Waving! Hi! As the girlchild says, “What did you do now?” Honestly, I don’t know. I can’t Google myself because there are other things I’ve done that rank much higher on Google, so I can’t find the little stuff any more. Did I have a show open this week? Nope. Nothing new there. I think. One next weekend and the following weekend, and then a couple weeks later. I have pieces traveling…but I don’t think any of them moved this week. So yeah. If you’re here, just let me know why. I wanna know.

Because really, all I’m doing at the moment is mostly survival mode. A lot of people tell me I make tons of work. I am constantly working, it’s true. I think that’s important. I also know it’s easier to do now that the kids are in college and gone most of the time. Not that I totally enjoy that existence…I do miss them, all the time, and would take them back…in fact, one comes home in 10 days. Woo hoo! He’s cringing now. And the other one, I just booked her flight home for a 2-week vacay with the parentals. OK, I’m sure she’ll see friends too. But when you come home after a difficult, emotion-grabbing, exhausting job and you think about what you want to do in the evening, it’s not like I’m gonna sit on the couch with my other and talk. I’m going to work. Even when I have social stuff…because this week I had book club and someone over for dinner and three hours at the vet and gaming, and I still made art every night.

I understand if that’s not for you. If you go to bed way earlier than I do (I suck at sleep). If you hang with humans and be in the moment (I do that…just less than you do). I don’t ever just WATCH TV. I don’t know how. My brain needs multiple stimuli to focus, even to calm. So I give it that. I don’t think that’s gotten better with age. In fact, I know it hasn’t. I’m ramping up more in overdrive as I age. Maybe it’s to make up for their being gone…or maybe this is just where I should have been the whole time and life got in the way. Who knows. And it’s funny, where other people think I’m working nonstop, I’m fully aware of every wasted moment, of the time I spend just sitting there spacing out or reading stupid political articles or answering email or just fucking DELETING emails. Or grading stuff, which is not a waste, but feels like a painfully disproportionate part of my free time.

Anyway. Yeah. I gamed last night. I wasn’t in the mood, but I did it. And I ended up going and getting the Master Pistol of whatever Dwarvenist cool stuff. Because I’m the ballistics expert in the group. Seriously not reality. I stitch during gaming, though, because my brain will otherwise shut off and take a nap, because it’s Friday and I’m exhausted.

I’m working on the bottom part of this twofer block…

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Turns out I totally misread the directions for around the outside of the tree. I don’t think I’m going to fix it. But I might.

Then I came home and started cutting out pieces of Wonder Under…with a conehead dog almost on my lap…first one and then the other.

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I got most of it cut out before I decided I was tired. It was late. The small pile on the far right were separating from the fusible web. That’s the wonder of using the last crap bits of Wonder Under that you can find in the house. They often do that. I need to go buy more.

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I don’t know if I’ll have time to finish that today…hopefully…but I have about 17 other things to either do or get ready to do first. Really. Should. Wake. Up. Earlier. Ugh.

One morning a week I attempt to sleep in. Sometimes it works. Last night, though, I forgot to change the alarm on my phone, so it woke me up for school…and that meant it took a long time to fall back asleep because this little guy heard it.

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He’s learned to use the cone to help him hold the ball. Yes, they both have cones on still. His paw isn’t too bad…hers is a mess. So meds and soakings and cones for all! Woo hoo!

Yeah. I could do without that. Anyway, possibly will be ironing to fabric tomorrow? I’m thinking? Maybe? If I’m efficient. OK, I’m always pretty damn efficient. I should own that. With that, I should go be efficient.

*The Smiths, Bigmouth Strikes Again

3 thoughts on “Sweetness I Was Only Joking*

  1. i came to your blog from some other blog (maybe molli sparkles?) back during the penis-on-a-quilt-that-wasn’t-actually-a-penis-on-a-quilt drama. i stay because i find your writing entertaining, educating, and reassuring. i too am a working, creating, and sometimes struggling woman. i enjoy the glimpses into your creative process and truly appreciate that you are willing to share the hard parts, not just of your art but of your life. thank you for sharing.


  2. I found you through Molli too…As a retired teacher…I enjoy reading about the balance you strive for between your teaching and art…but often find myself exhausted by all you do…You’re AMAZING!


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