She Isn’t Sure Where She’s Gone*

I would love to say I finished grading and got down to the nitty gritty of artmaking yesterday, but it was not the case. In fact, I’m still semi-buried. Remind me next time to close the gradebook a week early. That would have been smart. I still have kids sending me makeup work. I’ve just stopped looking at it. I’m just dealing with the last big project at this point, and it will get done today (even if it kills me).

My internet is still fucked. Gonna have to deal with that. But I can’t deal on a school day, so it’ll have to be Friday or Thanksgiving break. I think everything I need to do in the world is falling on Thanksgiving break. It’s a little scary.

I’m artistically frustrated right now. I feel off balance when I don’t make. I get cranky with no creation. Working on it, art brain. Trying to get there.

Some of yesterday’s delay was because I was trying to help the girlchild with an essay about political crap I barely remember…usually that involves her sending me an essay and FaceTiming me while I tell her what doesn’t make sense. At this point, I think she was reading to me out of her professor’s book.

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Before that, I was trying to grade projects with puppy asleep by me…

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Which is significantly easier than when he tries to play with me while I grade.

At some point, my input wasn’t enough…so we enlisted the boychild as well. We tried to get all of us on Google Hangouts…

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But we couldn’t hear the girlchild…hence her sad face. So she FaceTimed her brother in his dorm room in Ithaca while I was in Google Hangouts with him. Super complicated. And in the end, we all ditched her to her words…

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She finished this morning…or at least, she resolved all the comments we made.

I took a break and finished my library book because the loan was ending this morning and I only had 50 pages left of a 680-page book. And I didn’t want to wait until it was available again dammit. Puppy moved up to cat position…

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It was chilly last night…and then I went back to grading until I realized it was late and I was frustrated.

This was earlier, when I was grading on the computer with Kitten’s help…

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She’s very good at standing in front of the screen and knocking papers down.

So an entire weekend of grading stuff, a few breaks in there. And I’m not done. I feel like I’m doing it all wrong. That’s the problem with assigning these big engineering projects…at the end, you have to grade them.

And the part driving me nuts…four days with no artmaking. I wanted to be done with tracing by tonight. That’s so not happening. I wanted to be ironing by the weekend. I think that is also a no go. It’s going to make this one a really tight deadline. Deep breaths. Because when this one is done, the deadlines stretch out a bit and I have a little more freedom on what I do. Maybe. Hard to say. Certainly with school taking so much more time this year, it seems like I will never stop grinding my teeth. And someone called me about a side job…supposed to call them back today. Aargh. I need the money to pay for college, but I don’t have the time for this. I have to make time for it. Sleep. Whatever.

*Talking Heads, And She Was

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