I Wanna Be Your Left Hand Man*

I’m up! It’s morning! It’s a beautiful day! Can you tell that I have the next NINE days off work! I mean, as OFF work as you can be with 5 assignments to grade, a worksheet or two to finish creating, 140 pages of copyediting to do, and 1200 pieces to iron (OK, the last is a joy). So yeah, if you’re thinking, AWWW LUCKY, then you don’t really get that I bring home work almost every night and do these stupid 12-hour days sometimes and work every Sunday and sometimes Saturday as well. Honestly, you give teachers vacations so they don’t all quit their jobs and/or duct tape a particularly annoying child to a chair. Permanently. There’s a reason 50% of teachers quit by their 5-year anniversary.

With that said, I’m not copyediting or grading shit today…maybe tomorrow I’ll start. But I try to keep Saturdays free of that stuff.

This cat and people food…he’s got an issue…”I will stalk the plate crumbs.”

Two nights’ worth…chain stitch on the left top and then cross stitches. Maybe something else…can’t remember. I’m mostly just filling space.

Finally made it in to iron around 9 something. I did both sides…the landscape in the background. Although I have a little left to do on the right side. I’ve done about 150 pieces, that’s it. Not fast.

But I do love doing it…

I also love mornings where I can just sit here and text the kids back and forth while drinking my tea in my pajamas. It was nice.

This cat…she’s a bit psycho. I’ve been trying to persuade her to come back out into the living room and my office, where she used to hang out, but she’s nervous about the other cat…

She does love bathmats though.

Anyway, work, the good kind, is on my mind. Gonna do some art stuff today for sure. There’s a balance. I’m working on it.

*Vance Joy, Riptide

If I Kiss You Where It’s Sore*

Oh hallelujah dear Friday before Thanksgiving Break. Although today will be like managing wild and hungry chimpanzees while holding a chocolate birthday cake, I can see a big fat light at the end of the tunnel…at about 3:30 PM this afternoon, to be specific. Of course, I have 5 assignments to grade (not bad, actually), my author contacted me this morning and his manuscript is ready for copyediting (it’s OK…I asked for it over break…I need the money), and I just made a to-do list for all the shit around the house that needs doing, but hell…I just don’t care at the moment. I want to SLEEP…and most importantly…MAKE ART. Yes. That. With gay abandon. Throw confetti all over me. I wanna art myself into the ground.

Yes, I’m a little punchy and a lot exhausted.

Exhausted after doing this cool rock cycle lab all day, which started with teaching kids how to grate cheese (well, crayons) with a knife, in case they don’t have a cheese grater. Well, no, we were making sediment from a crayon rock.

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And then I missed photographing all the other steps in between because brain fart. Totally. But here it is after we compacted it and then melted it and then blended it and let it cool off.

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So lab days are always exhausting. But it was cool. I have no voice today, but that’s OK.

Then I went to the opening of California Fibers: Points of View at the Rose Gallery, Francis Parker School…there are my three pieces: Feeding Time, BirdWatch, and You Pollute Me. I look like I have a lot more energy than I really did.

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The show is really nice. I’ll post the whole thing sometime in the next few days. Not right now.

I came home after grabbing dinner and sat for a moment, trying to find the energy to do ANYTHING. I had Simba on one side of me and Satchemo on the other. My arms aren’t long enough to show both. No, I don’t need a selfie stick. It’s OK.

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And then, miracle of miracles, I came in the studio and put all the fabric away, cleaned up, and started ironing the new quilt. This thing is gonna be SO FUN.

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OK. Yeah. It’s huge. I get that. But I’m so excited about working on this. Really.

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I have my Nida Powers sign in here now. Although I really wanted it to be one word. I need to put it up on the wall, but I decided doing that on a rolling chair while tired would be a big fucking mistake.

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So I’ll wait. I will fully enjoy the 9 days off I have, even with all the shit I gotta do. It’s OK. I get to make lots of art in the middle of all that. Yay.

Regina Spektor, Better

We Don’t Notice Any Time Pass*

Insert pithy statement about being a middle-school teacher two days away from a week off from school. Make a Venn diagram about your feelings about the next two days versus break and your students’ feelings about the same. In your case, add in holiday stress because food, family, and travel. Then drop in some missing-your-kids feelings, because they are a million miles away. And take two Motrin for that headache that must be caused by something other than drinking heavily at night, because you didn’t.

I had plans for last night! I got about oh say maybe 45% into my plans and my brain and body gave out. So be it.

Somewhat strangely, on this day last year, I had just started ironing Wonder Under to fabric for my last quilt of 2016. Ironic that, because I did NOT start ironing last night, although that was my plan.

Here’s a puppy for you to look at, because he’s cute. He’s not actually a puppy. He’s over 2 years old. But he will probably always be the puppy because he’s small.

And hyper.

I did French knots on the righthand side to fill in some of the empty space in there.

Apparently empty space offends me. Actually, that might really be true.

I did manage to go shopping for background fabric yesterday, wash all the other things I bought (it was a weak moment), and then make piles of that and all the fabric from the last quilt that need to be put away.

So I guess there’s that, because I didn’t put any of it away. Or start ironing. In fact, I went to bed early, because I knew I’d have to be up early today for another ~~stupid~~ meeting. OK, they’re all stupid at the moment.

I couldn’t decide on a background fabric. I just knew I wanted it to be dark, and these are dark. So it will be one of them and then the other will get used for another quilt…or on the back of this one.

I wish I could say I’d get further along tonight, but I have an opening on the other side of town and it’s a lab day today (gonna melt crayons! in the name of science!), so the odds of my having any energy at all at the end of the day are decreasing rapidly. But I always have hope.

That’s how I get so much shit done. Hope. And crazyassness. Mostly the latter.

*The White Stripes, We’re Going to Be Friends

Anchored Down in Anchorage*

I’m feeling awesome because I’m three days ahead on the quilt! For now. Shhh. Don’t break the spell.

I had tutoring after school yesterday and taught a lot of one- and two-step equation-solving. Math…I used to be good at it, but now my brain freezes sometimes when trying to do it. I wonder if what I’m doing makes sense. I wonder if that’s because I don’t use it as much as when I was younger. I have to talk myself through solving a problem: I paid blah and he paid blah and we each owe half so without using an Excel spreadsheet, how do I figure that shit out? Ugh. I feel like quilting makes me Math all the time. Yesterday, I had to measure the drawing and figure out how much yardage I needed for the background. That’s math. I do have to draw it out, though, because I’m a visual learner. I don’t have a problem admitting that.

But first I graded more stuff, because that is the way of the teacher.

Some weird twisted chain stitch and some star stitches on the far right…

And then I cut for another hour, making it a total of 9 1/2 hours to cut out all those pieces. I started last Friday and now I’m done. Not bad.

I was tired and I knew I had to be up early for a meeting, so of course, I went ahead, grabbed all the boxes I needed, and started sorting Wonder Under…

There’s the requisite glass of wine, a boxful of pieces, and 14 boxes ready to go, all labeled with part numbers etc.

This is a new one for me. I don’t usually forget to write numbers on the pieces (then I can’t figure out where they go)…but I did it not once, but three times.

Sheesh. Brain dead much? It’s OK. It’ll be obvious what they are once I start ironing. It’s like the one kid who didn’t put her name on the test…if she’s the only one in that period, then it’s easy. It’s only if there’s more than one and they don’t have distinctive handwriting…then I’m fucked.

There they all are sorted. That took almost an hour. I wanted to quit about 300 times, but I persisted. As always.

So I can start ironing to fabric tonight? Well, first I have to clean up in here and put all the fabric away from the last one, plus I need a background fabric (hence the measuring and mathing from the night before). It’s on my calendar for after school. Looking forward to that. But first, I’m going to see what kind of chaos I can create in the classroom today (yikes…three days until vacation for the kids…this is where they turn into scary beasts, worse than a full moon). I can do this…

*Michelle Shocked, Anchorage (song note: I was born in Anchorage…some day I’ll go back)

So Take That Look out of Here*

My new oatmeal tastes funny. I couldn’t find the old stuff. Instant, but low carbs. I don’t need a million carbs for breakfast, but on a cold morning, a quick and easy oatmeal is nice. So the new one, ironically, being low carb, is way too sweet. I’m sure they’ve been uber-healthy and used some fruit juice or something, but blech. Yeah I’m a diabetic who doesn’t like sweet things. More irony. So I’m forcing myself to eat it because I need food and I hate wasting food (Hello Grandma…that’s you talking)…but yikes yuck blech.

Yesterday, my students started a new unit, so I got to draw…I know how meditative that is for me, but I was noticing how it worked for them on a Monday as well…just time to sit and color. To interact with the new content merely as pictures first. They were relatively calm for a Monday after a 3-day weekend…a Monday before getting a whole week off…

It didn’t take me all day to color it…I was done in 4th period…so I could grade stuff.

But then we had a 2-hour staff meeting afterwards, watching a video. The guy we were listening to was fine, although I don’t focus well at 3 PM on a Monday after teaching all day, so I had to draw to stay awake.

It was a long video…

I’m not disagreeing with the guy…I just think I’m already trying to do what he says. Not quite at the level he does, but I’m not sure I needed a video that long to get it. I fully understand the difference between equity and equality…there just aren’t enough hours in the day sometimes to do all the things teachers are supposed to do. Teach content. Take care of their basic needs. Give them the self esteem they’re lacking. Teach them the difference between their, there, and they’re. That one alone is a bastard.

I have no great insights after all that. But it makes me feel better about how I was trying to deal with the one kid a few weeks ago.

Home to the dogs and grading a couple of assignments (I’d really love to go into the week off with no grading…which is just about impossible)…Simba got his toy to stand up.

I did two nights’ worth on this…that weird chain-stitch R shape and some pistil stitches below it.

I don’t know why the dogs were so tired…they did nothing all day…

This one is really tired apparently.

I cut out another yard, the second to last one. I should have been more focused and finished, but I wasn’t. Tonight hopefully. Although I still have to grade.

Then I can sort and start ironing to fabrics…early! That’s a plus, for once. I’m looking forward to that part.

*Big Country, In a Big Country

You Put the Load Right on Me*

‘Twas a productive weekend…I finished grading 2 or 3 assignments, didn’t finish a bunch of other stuff, hiked a mountain, cut out a ton of Wonder Under, and replaced the headlight in my car (with help). That was an achievement.

We started late…the goal? Clevenger Canyon South, apparently 4.3 miles (a fact we questioned multiple times), on a day that was supposed to be cooler than it felt. The wonder of San Diego is the temperature can be quite warm in the mountains, even in November.

We climbed a lot in the first mile…and if you’d told me I was hiking to that rock (and beyond) that you can see on the ridge, I might have given up. But no. We kept going…

Looking back here on the trail we’d been on before going down into the canyon, where it was obvious one of the fires had gone through here (2007)…

So this little guy…I just about stepped on him. He never rattled…he never even moved. I noticed him, yelled snake, moved my foot further along than I had been planning, all in a matter of seconds. Yes, I realize we’re lucky he didn’t strike…because that’s a baby rattler and he wouldn’t have known to only dump some of his venom in my calf. It would have been an interesting hike, I guess…

From further up, the canyon is down where the green is, although there was still no water.

Evidence of burn even on the rocks…

Looking to the north…

And to the south…actually, my car is way way down there…

This was our goal: two metal chairs bolted to a boulder.

And a view to die for. Well. Not die. But we were glad to get there…

It ended up being 4.65 miles, mostly up for the first 1.7 miles.

And the way down was super fast. Yes…we were to the left of that rock most of the way to the far left peak. We didn’t do the last 0.2 miles to that peak. We had the view already.

Poles were helpful on the way down. The snake was gone on the way down.

More evidence of burn…

And then this was delightful…just remember that what looks like a scary dive bar on the outside houses a lovely bar with cool refreshing drinks and snacks on the inside…

Then last night, I did some feather stitching on this, above the righthand eye.

And I cut out a bunch of this…while watching a show in Icelandic. I think I’m semi-fluent now…

I think this was actually the night before…

There’s more of that in a bit, but these photos are from the Threads of Resistance exhibit, which made it to the Original Sewing & Quilt Expo in Minneapolis, Minnesota over the weekend. As always, I’m behind the sign…

And the curtain…

I kinda wish they wouldn’t hang the signs on the quilts…

But I’m in good company back there…

So I’m a woman of a certain age…who knows if and when I will ever have another period (NOT complaining), but the app updated and now it ignores perimenopause completely. I find this highly amusing.

And kind of a metaphor for women of my age (ignored). Whatever.

I graded more videos yesterday…at 3 minutes per kid, it takes a while, so I poured a hot cup of tea and grabbed my stitching, so I could listen better. It worked.

I got the hippo done and part of the sun…

For some reason, this month’s stuff is taking forever to stitch down.

Puppy was tired…but he wanted to be near me and my Wonder Under…

Sometimes more near than others.

I did about 5 hours of cutting out yesterday and 2 the night before, so I have a hefty chunk done…ahead of schedule.

Speaking of schedules, I need to get my butt outta here and to work. More progress tonight, I’m sure.

*The Band, The Weight

Try to Steal Your Mind’s Elation*

I’m so off task at the moment. I love having an extra day…it gives me the ability to BE off task. I worked last night on school and art. I will do more art today, but so far, I’ve put dinner in the slow cooker, cleaned the kitchen, partially cleaned the floors (more later?), talked to both kids (text) and my SIL (phone), and petted all the animals multiple times. I slept in too, although that was an animal management issue. Dozed might be a better word for it.

I spent 3 1/2 hours tracing last night. I got past halfway. Far past…good times. But first, I graded by watching 56 videos of 7th-graders explaining their ideas. With a blood-orange cider to assist in the process.

And I did two nights’ worth on the right side..some French knots and another stitch whose name I can’t remember.

At some point, I’ll put together a photo slide show of all of these over the year. Because that’s a good use of my time.

Then tracing…

I got all the way through Mindhunter’s first season, and then tried to finish Genius, which makes Einstein out to be an asshole, but a genius. Hence the name.

Yes, I did trace individual teeth. I can’t explain that. I just do it. The finger wrinkles (creases? are they wrinkles or creases? hard to say) are smaller, but I do them. There’s a lot of big pieces in this thing, so I don’t feel bad about it.

I just draw what needs to be drawn.

Puppy was cold…

Her sister, not so much. She’s such a sleeping freak.

I have a lot of these piled up to cut out in the next week.

I keep track of where I am on the tracing…just the number isn’t good enough…I need WHERE the number was. So you can see I got a ton done last night…

Only 300 or so pieces left to go. Another three hours probably. I can find that today…I think. I need to take these fluff balls out for a walk at some point…

And do some schoolwork. And more housework…and maybe eat some ice cream. Although that’s probably not necessary. Enter a couple of art exhibits…that too. But also just relax and enjoy a day home with nothing that is mind-bendingly crucial to do. That’s a joy in itself.

*Red Hot Chili Peppers, Californication

I’m Sorry We Do This*

I’m on hold. With Apple. It’s OK. It’s only 11 more minutes. She apologized. I will have to go to work at some time, that’s for sure. I’m relieved that it’s a short week…but I still need to get through the day. I’m deeply in need of sleep (always) and exercise (always) and some quiet hours away from school. Sometimes this job just leaches your brain away…which is why I haven’t been working when I get home. Well…not on school stuff. I’ve been tracing a ton of Wonder Under. In fact, last year at this time, I was doing exactly the same thing…tracing Wonder Under for some quilt. It makes sense…I like having the more brain-consuming tasks for holiday weeks, so I try to plan for that. I’m not sure what quilt I was working on…it must have been Give Me Time, because that’s the only thing I finished after October last year.

Anyway, I did go to book club and still came back and traced for over 2 hours. I tried to go to bed at a reasonable time, but apparently I suck at that.

It’s really boring to see this every night…even for me, it’s hard to focus some nights. The process is meditative, but standing for another 2 or 3 hours after work can be tiring.

I think I have 5 or 6 yards traced at the moment…but most of them are the big pieces of the main figure. I’m up into the little heads at the top, and they have a lot of little pieces, so I’m filling in all the empty spaces between the big spaces.

So I may not need more than the stuff I already have cut…but we’ll see. I’m looking forward to some hours on the couch watching bad television for hours while cutting out a million little pieces of Wonder Under. Braindead time. I’ve been watching Mindhunter…it’s really good. Scarily so.

More tracing tonight in my future. I’m still not even halfway. I’m close, but you’d think with 9 hours in, I’d at least be halfway. Sigh. Well I did most of the big pieces and they take longer to trace than the little ones.

At least that’s what I’m telling myself right now.

I spent 10 minutes cuddling with this big beastie. The other one is still looking for Midnight…makes me sad.

This one likes faucet water. This is him telling me he needs faucet water. Or him just being a brat so he can hang out on the kitchen counter. It’s hard to say.

So tempting dude. Seriously. A mean person would totally turn that faucet on. You are a very trusting beastie.

OK, Apple is done clearing me (it only took 30 minutes on hold to get there). It sounded like she was reading out of an instruction booklet to figure out what to do next. I’m glad she was successful. Now if only I could be as successful for the rest of today. Looking forward to the light table interaction tonight anyway, even if it’s just to get past the halfway mark.

*Jem, They

I Used to Live Alone Before I Knew You*

Well progress has happened. I blew off school for most of yesterday…and did art instead. I also ran more errands and dealt with my increasingly disastrous shoe issue (they all die at once apparently), and I cooked stuff for lunches and visited the parental units, but mostly I made art all day because that’s what my head could do. Grades are due Tuesday, but I’m far enough along that I think I can easily finish tonight. That’s the plan anyway.

So I drew for about two hours…added some tools, a UFO, and a sun and comet…like you do. When I put the final version together, I think I’m going to move the comet down and away from the sun a bit…but I don’t need to worry about that now.

On the other side, a rocket and the moon…

I’m totally leaving the rocket there.

Above, I added more stuff and things…science, a pocket watch, the dollar we don’t get paid…

A screwdriver and more science stuff…

But the top wasn’t pulling together, so I added the banner…yes I was watching Einstein while doing this, and he’s kind of a dick toward women (then again, many were, right? Not excusing it…).

Then we went to the parentals for dinner and I saw this picture again. Well that’s amusing. We actually got the boychild to smile.

My parents won a family portrait, so we were all in it. It’s a little frightening.

While I was there, I sewed down the snake and started on the hippo.

Then we came back and I numbered the drawing. I was hoping for the 800s, but knew it was way too big for that (it’s about 60 x 70″)…but 1348 isn’t bad. Really…it’s not.

That’s totally doable. I’m really liking this one…

I already marked the salt as knots…French knots instead of fabric dots. Makes more sense. Although there are small pieces in this thing, I didn’t need to make more.

Because of Daylight Savings, I had what felt like an extra hour, so I kept going for a while and did about an hour of tracing…

I got one side of the landscape traced, into piece 82 or so. Then I went to bed early and couldn’t sleep. Too many things in my head for that. Sunday nights suck for teachers…it’s so hard to clear your brain of the week so you can get enough sleep to get through it.

Anyway, the plan is to finish tracing Wonder Under this week and get all of it cut out hopefully by Monday, so I can alternate copyediting with fabric-choosing. I have some Thanksgiving stuff I have to do, but I’m hoping to have a good chunk of the week to do what I need to get done…I don’t have endless amounts of time to make this quilt, so I need to be on task. As always. OK now to face the week…

*Rufus Wainwright, Hallelujah

I Got a Mind Like Weather*

Well one thing about teaching middle school: some of them have incredible empathy and some of them are socially inept and some are just jerks at this age. One hopes they will grow out of it. Most of them were in the empathetic to inept range yesterday…inept in that they blurt stuff out and want you to explain everything when you don’t have the emotional energy to do so, and probably don’t need to burst into tears yet another time. Then again, at least one adult was in the socially inept range.

We rescued Midnight out of a tree in 2005 and she was the girlchild’s baby from there on…

She’s the only cat we’ve ever had who would ride in a stroller.

When I got home, I petted this thing a lot…he misses her too. He went looking for her yesterday. They were buddies.

You know he doesn’t understand where she went.

Eventually I found the mental energy to stand up and draw…I don’t feel like I got much done, but I did whatever I did for almost an hour. I suspect most of it was staring at the paper. But I added a background landscape…

It’s simple enough. Just a place to land the body…

I used to always just drop them in space…and sometimes I still do, these legless torsos, like busts on invisible pedestals, floating in the middle of nowhere. Now I feel like they need a home. I’m sure that says something about me.

I added in the sewing stuff that was in the original drawing but wouldn’t fit on my second try. And I added the glow around Midnight…that solves the problem of dark cat on dark background, but also makes her look (as a friend said yesterday) a bit more badass…

She wasn’t really that badass. She looked it because she had that long nose and those green eyes, but then she’d rub up against you or knead your belly with her claws and chirp with this tiny little voice, and you’d realize what a big softy she was. I miss her. It’s hard when there’s no warning, when they’re fine one day and the next they’re so ill there’s no way out of it. It sucks for those of us left behind.

This morning’s sunrise.

It must be about Daylight Savings Time…for me to be seeing sunrises. I try to get up after that…OK, off to school and the mostly immature emotions of 12-year-olds. Hopefully they’ll be on task and I’ll be patient with them when they’re not. Some days that’s harder than others.

*Max Frost, Adderall