Maybe in That Order

OK. This week. Is gonna be a bit nuts. I worked all Saturday morning/afternoon trying to get the alternative assignment done for sex ed. Successful at that. Can’t use the same one they use in 7th grade. That’s silly. But now it actually exists. I have a ton of stuff to get done in the next three days. I spaced out on packing up a quilt this weekend, so that’s after school. So is clay. So is book club. It’s all good. I’ll get through it all. I might even sleep at night. Maybe.

So clay stuff. I finished carving the sgraffito piece and started adding underglaze colors.

It’s going to take a while…

Someone was like, then stop! Don’t do it! It’s fine the way it is!

Maybe. But I want to try what’s in my head. I can always do this again without all the colors. I know how now.

Getting the space to experiment as an established artist is hard. Also people are always telling me what they think I should do.

I really don’t do critiques. I have a voice, I know what I’m doing most of the time. It’s in my head. My SAQA local group met on Zoom yesterday and now they’re setting up critiques, and I’m like, ugh, no. Don’t wanna. It’s fine. I know some people want other people to give them suggestions. I don’t. Thanks.

The tiles got bisque-fired…

They need a clear glaze on top.

Friday night’s dinner drawing.

We had a family dinner Saturday night, so no drawing then.

And then lots of Wonder Under being trimmed…Friday night…

Saturday night…

And I finished Sunday night, just over 10 hours…

I started sorting, but then was reminded that we had to make the bed, and then it was bedtime. So I didn’t finish. Tonight there’s a lot going on, but I’m hoping to finish sorting and get the office organized and cleaned up for ironing to fabrics. I do still have another quilt that is ready to be ironed together. I may start that first. We’ll see. It’s all starting to pile up in here. I have a quilt top that is half stitched down, still waiting for my sewing machine to come home. I know the necessary part was shipped a little over a week ago. Frustrating.

This silly boy apparently had fleas.

Like WTF, that’s why you’re on flea meds. So he got a bath. I didn’t do it.

I spent a little time cleaning up plants on the deck and found this swallowtail cocoon.

It was empty, but it was cool to find, hidden away like that.

OK. I’m very much in survival mode at the moment. Getting stuff done, a little bit at a time. Panicking when I realize something isn’t done. Lots of not sleeping and trying to remember shit. I write a lot of things down and then forget to look at the lists, plus I have phone reminders, but then I ignore them. Good brain. Silly staff meeting today. Hopefully better than the last ones about literacy (unlikely). Then clay. Then pack up quilt. Book club. Sort Wonder Under. Clean office. Maybe in that order.

Head in a Magnet

Well. It is finally Friday. 19 days of school left. Testing for 2 of them. Not gonna be there for 2 of them. Teaching sex ed soon, so that’ll be at the same time easier and harder, depending on my voice and the specific class. Gotta let some of rest of it go…I know who will be in my classroom those two days and I just have to let it go. It’ll be fine. Until it’s not.

I’ve got three days and about 2 1/2 hours of reading until my library book automatically disappears. No problem. Well. I gotta teach today…roller coaster physics. Fun stuff. The kids did awesome on this performance task practice. Really proud of them. Look! I taught them something! Sigh. And I am going to the ceramics studio tonight to get more done on that sgraffito piece…finish carving, maybe start underglaze? We’ll see. Not entirely sure how I’m doing that. Things are easy in class when all the materials are provided…harder if you’re doing it on your own. Have a ton of schoolwork today. I got some done in class yesterday but I don’t think I’ll get much done today unfortunately. Next week though…next week is testing, so let’s hope. Planning has to happen this weekend. I got the egg drop stuff planned, but not the alternative assignment for my 8th-grade opt outs for sex ed. Can’t give them the same shit as last year. There’s an easy option, but it’s boring. I’m not good at the easy option. Tend to double down when I’m buried. Silly really.

Most important problem for next week? What stitching will I take for the plane? What books? I know. ALL the books. I will have to grade while I’m gone. That’s fun. Hopefully it’ll be quick and easy. Hopefully the flight will actually have wifi so I can grade. Better than sitting in a house with all the fam and trying to do it. There’s a ‘dedicated workspace’…it’s a table in the middle of everything. Yeah no. However, sitting on a deck and doing it? That might be OK (or it might be raining and freezing…welcome to Maine in May). It’s all good. It’s new and different. I’m looking forward to it as I’m stressing out about it. Like everything. Brain MRI is scheduled…they wanted to do the same day as my surgery, but I suggested that was problematic. Then they picked the day I get the radiotransmitter thing inserted in my boob for presurgery stuff, which is metal, so that’s out. So now I get to spend 20 minutes on a Saturday with my head in a magnet. Sounds lovely. I should get the results while I’m still teaching. Even more lovely.

We watched the movie Yesterday the last two nights…and it was light and cheesy (good after Baby Reindeer‘s dark and turgid), but the best part, the part that almost made me cry…wait, I don’t wanna spoil it if you want to see it and haven’t…damn, there’s someone who shows up in the movie who is dead in real life. I remember when he died. I was in middle school, it was a rainy morning, because dad was driving us to school, and it was on the radio. Clearly remember it. I didn’t really understand the significance, but I do now. And it was sweet. Lovely. Sad. Or I’m just an emotional exhausted mess and pretty much anything will put me over the top. You decide.

I’ve been cutting things out at night, trying to do a yard a night…or an hour…or both. I was doing really well the first three nights, but last night, this was after an hour and 15 minutes and definitely past my bedtime…

Definitely did not finish that yard. To its credit, there were lots of tiny complicated bits on that yard.

The night before, I finished…

I’ve done a total of almost 5 hours so far…and a little less than 4 yards. I think. Yes. Well, except I had that one small piece with a head and two pieces of hair. Whatever. I’m more than halfway done. Insert arty photo of the same pile of Wonder Under pieces…

Yeah. I know. It is actually relaxing to cut these out. That’s the plus. Boring in photographs. Barely any viewer engagement. Insert photos of ceramics to excite people! Hey those take forever too. I need to get the sgraffito piece done so I have enough shelf space to make the top part of the torso though. Need to use up the clay I have and not buy more of that type too. Ha! That’s my limitation on the world figure…I have a limited amount of that clay. Should be interesting.

ANYWAY. I need to go to school and be productive. I need more tea (I left my teacup in the car the other morning. Almost died.). I need more patience. Seriously, kids, I guess if you WANT to be kicked out, tell me to shut up some more. Love that. Teach roller coasters, let them compete in an escape room…for candy. Go play with clay (very meditative and chill…and Fridays are notoriously quiet at the studio). Then cut things out. Read my book! I can plan school stuff tomorrow…

Dirty Windows

My windows are dirty. This is not a euphemism for something. My actual house windows are dirty. I see them every day and it’s on my to-do list to clean them, but then I do 5 things and the day is gone and I still haven’t finished everything, I’m still eating dinner at 8:30 because I didn’t start cooking early enough because I was grading things and making videos (I made 11 videos for school yesterday). I think I read my book yesterday. Maybe. A chapter. I know I didn’t shave the Man’s head…I remembered this morning that I was supposed to help with that. Oh well. He’ll do it himself. If only the windows would do themselves.

Busy weekend, but they all are. I actually slept in on Saturday until 9 AM. I mean, minus the dog barking and the Man opening and closing things. It was delightful. But apparently not enough, because here I am on Monday morning feeling like a truck hit me and maybe I need another three cups of tea before I’ll be functional again.

Let’s start with clay. I have this mug that was too big so it became a planter that I was making, just for fun, not art, and it was finally dry enough to either fire or decide what I wanted to do about glazing. Glaze is hard, but I wanted to try these glazes that are shiny after the bisque fire. So I remembered to bring the glazes to the studio on Friday (not enough room to store them there) and painted it…

Painting glazes is a pain in the ass…you need at least two coats, maybe three. We’ll see how this turns out.

Pro: it’s done. Con: I realized when I was done that it had taken me 2 hours. Another late dinner. Ah well.

I also traced…in fact, I finished tracing the Wonder Under last night…15 nights…

19 hours and 13 minutes…

7 yards and a bit…

I think I stayed up too late for all of those 15 nights trying to get an hour in, or last night, just trying to finish. It’ll be at least 7 hours to cut it all out, probably more. Lots of little pieces in there.

Saturday, I went to Visions with my quilt guild folks to see the new Latine exhibit there. There’s a design thing going on because San Diego and Mexico, so the museum had some new and different artists showing, which was nice.

Mely Barragàn…

Her piece Shallow Water Emerges Til Dawn…

Very much asks you to touch it. The chains were especially nice, dangling off the ends.

Chain fabric even.

Marisa Raygoza…

Emotional Support Rock…I’m feeling this one especially.

Tumble Dry

Some embroideries from her movie The Path of a Tear…

And some soft sculpture, although there’s nothing soft about a gun.

She Used Her Head As a Revolver

There were art dresses, which somehow I didn’t photograph, and weavings as well…

The most intriguing part of this piece, by Olivia Arreguin, Womb in a Dress, was the DNA she knotted into the womb.

Cool exhibit…check it out.

Also walked the dogs…was puppy sitting Annie…

We all needed a walk.

The path was really overgrown with flowers…

The two old guys were a little…um…panty.

Got my 3 miles in though.

Check out the glare on that cat…

Nova seemed very offended by Simba’s presence.

OK, well, I’m still reviewing science for the state test. The kids are rebelling against it, but whatever. They’d rebel against anything but naps and candy right now. Makes my life fun. Friday was annoying. Thank goodness for clay at the end of the day. Today will be different…I changed it up. Constantly trying to find different ways to get info in their heads…takes a ton of time and energy. I’m running low on both. Then staff meeting. Then clay again…not sure which piece I’m going to work on. Then cutting things out. Probably need to grade things in there too. Ugh. Or planning. That’s definitely a thing. This week is survival. Maybe all of them are. Well, I start teaching sex ed at some point, so that’s at least an attention-getter…but they’re all convinced they don’t need to do anything else for the rest of the year. Fun times.

Panic Friday

Hello panicked Friday. Have you seen my work to-do list? Yeah? Me too. I’m deep breathing right now. Literally couldn’t get through everything on it today if I could clone myself (and I wish I could). I wish my district could figure out how to say no to parents, but they can’t. I suspect none of them can at the moment. But when you do that, it all falls on staff to deal with…and I’m done. Yesterday was a clusterfuck of tiny fires threatening to be big ones. I put most of them out, and then after school, there were more…this morning, more…I either need to up my meds, stop sleeping, or call in sick for three days. Just to deal with stuff for a tiny few kids. Can’t deal with the large majority at all. If I stop taking time for myself, to make art, to read, fuck that, to eat and sleep and poop, well then I might get through it all. Deep breaths. Let’s hope that I’m efficient as hell today and get through a healthy enough chunk that I can do one fun thing this weekend. ONE.

Trace trace trace.

I’m 15 hours into the tracing…and just hit the 1300s. So I have about 350 to go.

Pretty sure my original guess was 20 hours.

Last night, I traced a barn owl, two bombers, and a bunch of bombs. Fun times. Oh, and the moon. I’m getting there.

I also stitched with friends, although I tore out the roof stitching 4 maybe 5 times.

It’s not like the picture, but it will be fine. This is the last house I need to embroider for this block of the month. Then the center piece (which is large) and put it all together. Then borders. Finished by 2035.

I was watering the other day, and saw these…

And this…

And this…

No time to water, plant, clean. Ugh. OK. Gotta go in and start dealing with all the things. Which includes some literacy meeting time. Ugh plus at least I might have some time to work. Maybe. We’ll see if I have the brain power for it. Clay after school (after doctor’s appointment). Then grade things and trace things. I’m really trying to carve out time tomorrow for a museum visit with my guild. We’ll see. Also a hike would be nice. Hanging out with the Man might be nice too.

We have both parents! But still no baby squawks. Me sad. At least they’re both still there. Presumably there’s eggs? More of them? They can lay up to 13 apparently. Get on it, you owls!

Punctuated…

Middle of the week. State testing. Pro: some time when I’m not teaching. Con: state testing. Not a fan of the testing, y’all. Not a fan of the long sitting (or standing for me) and trying to keep kids on task/awake/quiet. Don’t understand the purpose of it all. And although we have short days for the kids, and we get to have a lunch for once (which is nice), I’m then pretty much useless for schoolwork for the afternoon. Which sucks. I did get some grading done, which is good. I have a plan for Friday, when I have to be out in the afternoon for literacy. Also good. I’m completely NOT planned for next week or anything after. Well. I know basically what I’m doing. I just don’t know what it looks like. Stressful. I’ll get my head around it eventually; just probably not today. Today is the second day of English testing, then lunch with friends, then union meeting and a late pilates class. It’s a lot. Tomorrow is a new sex-ed curriculum meeting because ugh.

Monday was yucky. Mostly because of the stuff after school. I’m not a fan of all of us reading and listening and taking tests in the library as a staff. People are noisy, my brain is overwhelmed, and I can’t think straight. They give us stuff and expect us to be able to process it immediately, but this is not how I learn. It’s frustrating. And the ‘homework’ they give us…it’s concerning. I know kids need to learn to read. I’m completely pro. I’m concerned though when they talk about using my (shitty) curriculum to set up supports for all the different levels of literacy. Because I would have to create all that. It doesn’t exist. And I’ve spent four exhausting years creating things and I don’t think I can do a fifth. Not the way it’s being presented right now. The amount of thought and insight that goes into considering that for two whole kids? Now multiple that by 130 kids. Or more. Hurts my head.

So my solution to that crazy was to go do ceramics. I added things in the bottom.

I guess I was feeling whimsical? It happens. I spent about an hour building things. I’m still waiting to get the tools to finish the sgraffito planter. Maybe Saturday?

Then I came home and worked for a bit, then traced for a while. I forgot to take a picture, which is OK, because they all look similar. I traced again last night after going to the gym and reading my book for a really long time and booking a place to stay when I visit the girlchild in July in San Francisco. I’m excited about that. We didn’t get our Spring Break trip due to money issues mostly. Summer is looking equally bleak. Lots of painting and furniture moving and handing money over to contractors to fix the flooding issues from January. Not fun. So having a short trip in there IS fun. Here’s three of the five yards that are now traced after last night…

Twelve and a half hours into the tracing, at about 1075 pieces so far, 600 to go, probably at least another 6 hours. Fun times. It is actually very meditative. Just long. Big complicated piece.

I graded through most of testing. These strata things were fun.

For some, I guess. Some kids were just confused by it, even though I did a sample with them the day before to show them how. Hopefully I’ll be able to do more with it next year. We ran out of time. We always run out of time.

Anyway. Today. Kinda long, but punctuated by good things. Hopefully chill.

OK Everywhere…

I’m up early again. Another eye exam. I failed the field vision test in one eye. I told the doc it was because the spinning cabbage was in the way. So I’m up an hour early on a Monday…a MONDAY…before school to go in and fail again. Fun times.

Busy weekend…but good in general. Still had to do some work, but not as much as usual. I think. Who knows at this stage?

Art opening in Liberty Station on Friday night, in pure exhaustion mode…

Ah. Just realized the show is up for a while.

Moya Devine and I shared words, made pieces, and then made pieces in response to those pieces.

The drawing at the top left and the quilt are mine. Moya couldn’t make it to the opening. She is in San Francisco. Part of the reason we paired up is because she lives far away and I didn’t have time to meet with anyone locally. I love all the people who did, and hopefully I can post some stuff from the show later this week, when I’m not totally rushed.

We had dinner out afterward. And I drew.

I drew Saturday night too, but IDK what happened with that one. Oh yeah. Great food, nice servers, shitty ambience caused by uncontrolled screaming children, and then when we moved outside to escape that noise and kids careening into our chairs, then we had cigar smokers. Multiples. Surrounded. Not going there again.

Anyway. I had quilt guild in the morning, an interesting lecture on Aurifil threads…

My official stitch for guild meetings.

Also took a ceramics workshop this weekend with Sarah Anderson to learn sgraffito.

It was really fun to do. And it came with dogs.

I will always come for the dogs.

I did two tiles…

But I also had a planter…it just wasn’t quite hard enough yet.

I started carving it in class and realized I’d never finish. Plus it wasn’t hard enough. So it’s on my shelf hardening now. It’ll be fine. I’ll get it done. Although I have no carving tools. It’ll be fine!

It’s a fun way to turn my drawings into a physical thing though.

If that’s a goal of mine. Yeah, I made it into the official video (everyone did…it’s OK).

I did a bunch of tracing too.

Almost two hours Saturday night (to make up for none on Friday…too exhausted).

Almost an hour last night. In the mid-800s…finally halfway.

Tetris washing up in science prep room on Friday.

Doing the dishes. Things they never told you about in school.

Anyway. I did relax a bit this weekend. Well, I say that and I’m still grinding my teeth. Ah well.

OK. Eye doc, start of state testing review, long staff meeting, hopefully followed by some clay stuff and tracing. We’ll see. That’s my goal anyway. I won’t be done tracing this week, I think…maybe next week. My clay pieces won’t be done this week either. I have to make some glaze decisions though. Scary stuff. OK. Gotta go. Oh wait! So I haven’t heard the baby owl for a few nights…again. I hate this. I think like two or three have died so far. There was a parent around last night, some squawking. Thought this was dad…maybe mom was in there laying another egg and that’s why baby was quiet? I don’t remember any quiet the last two years though.

Who knows?

Hope everything is OK in there. Hope everything is OK everywhere.

I Like Your Butt…

Hey. I’ve thought every morning this week was Saturday, and I was wrong about all of them. Including this one. Today is so not a Saturday; it’s like the antithesis of a Saturday. Give a quiz, then take your kids to an assembly, then do duty, then go to an art opening. Collapse somewhere appropriate (bed or couch), rouse self, grade things, trace Wonder Under, sleep. Hopefully. The dog is here without the boychild and sometimes he’s a rabble rouser (the dog, not the boychild…well, I mean, IDK about the rabble he might be rousing). Did I just use some conjugate of ‘rouse’ three times in the last paragraph? My brain must be trying to tell me something (DRINK YOUR TEA WOMAN).

Things that were awesome about this week: My teacher’s aide covered all my sciencey boards for state testing this week so I didn’t have to. She’s amazing. Really. I will miss her efficiency.

My piece from class that I made in February or March finally came out of the glaze kiln, completely fucking awesome.

I love this…even the brown splotches. I am not a perfectionist with glaze. At all. This is great. Imagine a tiny quilt in the center bit. This is awesome. I need my sewing machine. And time. Lots of time.

I love my current book, The Hexologists by Josiah Bancroft. And it’s a series! Even better. Although maybe the next one doesn’t exist yet. Nope. Get writing, man.

“Strobing fistula”…that’s a quilt name. Or a band name. Or a medical diagnosis.

Progress report grades are done so I don’t have to panic for a while about grades. Also, state testing starts next week, so there’s two days I can grade while they test, plus two days I just have to manage kids and not present a lesson on something I’m unclear on. Like space. Ugh. I love space; don’t get me wrong. I just don’t know enough about it.

So I have a ceramics class tomorrow on sgraffito. Which is fun to spell. It’s less (for me) a class about the technique and more the experience with the instructor. So we’ll see how that goes. I had to go in yesterday and build something to practice on (I made a planter). It needs to be leather hard by tomorrow afternoon. I wish I knew how to predict that, but whatever. I’m excited to be learning something new.

I am also still building the world woman or whatever I need to call her. I’ve got ideas for the body cavity and ideas for adding to the world she’s standing on, and eventually I’ll start working on her upper torso, which will have to be separate until I am ready to dry her, because she doesn’t fit in my shelf. Ah well.

There’s a couple people I see in the studio all the time, so you talk. This one guy walked past and said, “your stuff is always so cute” and I’m like, WHAAA, that’s a BUTT…

And he’s like, “I was gonna say I liked your butt, but…”. Funny. Like that. The butt is a little saggy. Might be pretty real. The back needs some work. Added a whale tail.

And a wildfire…it needs smoke. I’m stuck in this place of not knowing how to glaze these types of sculptures. I’m going to have to think about it with the other female figure. She’s getting close to dry I think. Maybe. I’m doing it slowly. Anyway, this is fun. I enjoy it.

I’m also enjoying the tracing, although my thumb is sore…not sure if it’s drawing or clay or something else.

I’m up to the 600s. More than a third, less than a half.

I had to start a 4th yard. Lots of big pieces in the figures. Long leg parts.

Probably someone wants to know about the weird eye thing and the doctor. Well, it’s not my eyes. My retinas and optic nerves are fine. They are happy campers. All 10 layers of the retinas are attached firmly. So that’s good. But that means it’s my brain. In fact, we were finally able to figure out that I see it with both eyes…so that rules out the eyes anyway, because I see it in the same place and the same thing. So. I’m getting a brain MRI. Occipital lobe? Also the doc thought maybe it was a migraine aura…for two months? Apparently a possibility. She asked about stress. After I fell out of my chair laughing…well. So I’m keeping a headache diary, even though I’m not really getting headaches. I mean, I am, but they’re the normal kind that come at the end of the school year. Some of them have names and presences attached to them. All very weird. Trying not to think too hard about it. Because that’s more stress. Thanks, brain. Appreciate the message.

Yeah. I mean, not really, because I do still care; I’m just so tired of caring. And managing.

I needed to pick emojis for the next unit.

Seemed fair. The sex ed unit was harder…I’ll let you guess (and no, I did not use an eggplant, although I thought about it for a good long while).

Simba is a good boy.

The bear vs man thing is hysterical…and then so not.

It would be lovely to live in a society that listened to women. And believed them.

Ending with this…Faith Ringgold’s quilt on the cover.

Such amazing stuff. Wish I’d met her.

OK. Really. I can do today. I can. It’s easier than yesterday. I might need a lot of tea. A LOT of tea.

Write Fast

Up early, another doctor’s appointment, this one to figure out what this weird thing I’ve been seeing in my eye since March is…probably not an optical migraine for this long. So that’s been worrisome. I’ve had one batch of scans/dilations/bright flashlights and look at my ear things, and they found nothing, but it didn’t go away (they never do, y’all), so I got leveled up! And it’s a 3-hour appointment plus some other thing, and I can’t take a whole day off at this point, so I’m going in to school for the second half. Hopefully the eye dilation will be toned down by the time I get in. Anyway, it means I have to leave in 24 minutes, so write fast!

It’s OK, all I do is work work work (8:30 PM last night, 6:20 AM this morning) and make art (hallelujah). I did work on the clay thing on Monday, but as often happens, I forgot to take photos…I’ll do it tomorrow. The quilt is just being traced…it’s big and complicated, so I guessed about 20 hours…

It all pretty much looks the same, day after day.

I’m still on the second yard of Wonder Under…that will change.

I found a numbering fuckup…I managed to skip backwards 20 pieces and had to add ‘a’ to all 20 because I’d already used those numbers.

Good times. Rolling toward 1700 pieces.

I’m just about 400 pieces in, so less than a quarter of the way through…and just over 4 hours, so that’s impressive. I do usually estimate 100 pieces an hour, but it’s rare that I make that. I figured 20 hours for this…we’ll see.

In house progress, here’s one old fix from the previous owners…

That wood has all been replaced…

Then we realized there’s about three different colors of brown paint. Ugh. Picked one. Suspect no one (but you) will ever notice. Certainly I haven’t for years and I live here. They are slowly moving around the house and getting this bit done. Putting gutters in will hopefully permanently solve the problem of the water damaging the wood down there…that and digging out a trench around the edges. Fun summer project there.

From The Hexologists, the book I’m reading for book club.

Not that my anxiety needs any support in that. It’s well-versed in arming itself.

OK. Doc. Uncomfortable eye things. For a long time. School…teaching lunar phases again…yesterday’s lab had me walking them through each step…the instructions say, for the lower grades, you may need to walk them through this. 8th grade, y’all…not so lower. It’s OK. It was fine. My voice is shot though. Then pilates, then sleep. Oh wait. I might have to do some other stuff first. Like work, eat, trace. All good. Not the work part. That can fuck off. I had my final observation/evaluation review yesterday. I did fine. Wasn’t really worried about it. I don’t have to have another one (unless I get a psycho principal…had those before) until the year I’m hoping to retire. That’ll be a fun one.

Art. Meditating on Wonder Under later.

It Might Be Easy Next Time…

Hey Monday. Be nice.

So I was productive this weekend; always feels better than when I’m not. I got all three of the big plants I bought planted, although the first one was such a challenge that I thought the next two would be horrendous too, but they were easy peasy. Nice that. Don’t give up! It might be easy the next time. Am I done planting and weeding and trimming? Never. I met this guy…I left his weed standing so he could continue to shelter sort of under it.

It’s OK. There’s lots of weeds out there. I left a bunch. My protea is gonna bloom nicely this spring…

I have two volunteer tomatoes…one is inside (it’ll have to move) and one is tiny…

They’re both compost tomatoes. Best kind. I let the mice eat them really, they’re so tiny. Must have been cherry tomatoes.

So artwise, I got this one out of the kiln and now have to decide on glaze…

She’s from February and is meant to have a tiny quilt hanging inside her.

Then I got this one together and onto a shelf.

Hopefully she holds up. I changed her a little, moved the mug. Now I get to start something new…although I should figure out glaze first on that other one. Two drying, one bisqued.

Then I worked on the big crone drawing…

Added a barn owl and some bombers…and a cat.

Then sketched out what’s next down below…

Hopefully I’ll draw that tonight. And I did more up top…

Oh, I forgot, I framed this for a FIG show that will open next Friday at Liberty Station at the Dance Place hallway gallery.

My co-artist used this for a digital piece she made that I haven’t seen finished yet, and then I made that smaller quilt from another digital collage she did. So we’ll have four pieces hanging together in the show.

We also went on a hike Saturday…lots of flowers…

And one big coyote that kept traveling toward us until it found its way up the hill.

So one of the thing that has needed to be fixed for about 6 months is my stained-glass side window in the entryway. The supports had come loose and it would wiggle and make noise if the door was closed too hard. It’s been there since before we moved in, so probably from the 80s. The previous owner made it. The wood around it has been an issue too, so with the repairs related to the January flooding, I had asked for the wood to be replaced. It took a while to find a glass expert…

But he had a plan for it…enclosing the art glass in layers of tempered glass to protect it and weatherproof it and stabilize it. Sounds good.

So they leveraged it out of there on plywood…and now we have this lovely view for 4-6 weeks.

It has a tiny gecko door in the bottom left. The cats are excited. The entryway is also very dark now.

Saturday night’s dinner drawing…

They forgot about us so I got more of the drawing done. It’s been hard to finish one lately (and this one isn’t finished); they bring the food out so fast.

OK. So drawing tonight, clay this afternoon, staff meeting with homework (ugh). Teaching today is an assessment of what we did for most of last week. We’ll see how that goes. The previous assessment was eh. So many kids didn’t turn it in that it made it easier to grade. I did that this weekend, all but one class. So hopefully I can get through that class today as they’re doing the next assessment. Getting closer to the end…one more short unit, then test review, egg drop, sex ed, and I’m out! OK. That’s a lot. This week is a lot. Getting there.

But That’s What I Saw!

Oh my. This week is coming after me with a vengeance. My counselor used to tell me that I lived for stress, that it propelled me, and I don’t think that’s true, but it is true that I can rise (and fall) to the occasion. By the way, if you’re worried that I’m not doing fabric things too…I am. I sewed a label on Monday night, and last night, I did some drawing on the next big quilt, which I might start before I finish the other two. Oh wait, I’ve already started if I’m drawing, huh? So yeah, let’s do the fabric-related stuff first. I taped the big drawing together on Friday or Saturday night…can’t remember. Then I’ve been letting ideas percolate in my brain. I’ve got this whole crone/Mother Tree thing reverberating as all the crap comes in from the states banning abortions and letting healthy women get sick before they deal with miscarriages etc. I’m so angry about that. Nah! Medicine is stupid, right?! I tell you, we deserve to die out at the moment with some of the stupidity that abounds. So somehow all that is gonna get into one drawing. OK. A challenge. I need a challenge that takes my brain off work right now. So last night, I cleared everything OFF the drawing, then penciled a crone and a tree in (which you can’t see), but also finished all their legs and feet (which I didn’t photograph), and started with missiles.

The thicker black line is from the original drawing…the thinner is what I was adding.

Like I said, missiles. More to go. Now I have a plan. I only had about 25 minutes. After dinner and doing computer stuff to totally revise what I’m doing because my digital projector bulb at school went out Monday morning and they still haven’t found a replacement so I’ve been teaching without one and/or in the library, which is killing my hips for some reason…standing in there is just really bad on my body for some reason. I’m wearing different shoes today and trying to remember to sit down, but it’s a shitty setup in there, my kids all try to sit with their friends and then talk, which they won’t do in the assigned seats in the classroom. As much. Let’s be real. The worst part is the lack of communication from the district and our IT person. Literally no one answered the emails. It wasn’t until yesterday at 9:45 AM, almost 24 hours after the first email went out, that I knew we didn’t even HAVE a replacement bulb. Because why would we keep those around? Because teachers can’t teach without them? I did make a comment to my principal about feeling sick leave coming on if one didn’t show up for today (it won’t; hence my revising last night at 9 PM, fuckers). So. Yeah. My legs are already pissed at me. SCHOOL. Also don’t ask about literacy, the sub plan I don’t have for Friday because IDK what I’ll be doing or how far I’ll be or even what room my poor sub will be in while I’m doing literacy, so I guess I’m writing that Thursday night? Or next week’s stuff that I didn’t ask for. I’m not sleeping again. Grinding my teeth.

So in response? I’ve been claying more. I was so pleased on Monday…I finally got Her Weirdness done…

The holes in the arms are for hanging fabric wings of some sort. The tubes on top, fabric hair of some sort. If I ever sew again.

I’ll sew again. No worries. The back is not as exciting. And then, when I was trying to get her on a drying shelf, she tumbled. Sigh. She didn’t tumble far, but far enough. Ceramics is breakable and a pain and melts when it’s hot and is sometimes unpredictable and cracks and shit happens. I remember that. And it’s OK. It really is. She tumbled because I’m short. And now I know how tall the tallest lower shelf is and I will plan for that. Maybe. Really. I’m not good at following the rules anywhere.

So I started reassembling. Monday was really going to be putting the head on, triumphantly putting her on the drying shelf, and then finishing the planter that was going to be a mug but that was too big. Ha! That’s a no. So I went in yesterday too, just because I didn’t want to leave it until Friday and have parts drying all over the place. And first, I finished the damn planter to get SOMETHING on the drying shelf.

I know. Not fancy. Just a planter. I do have plans for some pretty utilitarian stuff.

And then I started in on her. There was one person in the studio when I started and he left pretty soon after, and then it was just me and that damn fly that wouldn’t leave me alone. I fixed both hands and the head, which had a crease in it, and then the cat, the poor cat, who is still missing some leg parts and her tail (that’s Friday). She looks angrier, which is acceptable…

That one eyelid. I thought about fixing it but I kind of like it. Yes, she separated in the middle, so I’ve been rehydrating that join on both sides, but everything else was so fragile, I didn’t want to try putting her together again yet. The left arm broke in half with part of the supporting wing, so I had fixed that on Monday, and did more repairs on it yesterday. It’s missing part of the bottom, so that’s a Friday fix. Can’t do it now, because it’s lower than the rest of that part. Can’t have it leaning on that. Then on the bottom, I fixed the snake head and tail, plus that weird lip the cat stands on. Those need to solidify before the next step.

I had this whole moment of ‘this is why clay is annoying; it breaks and shit happens’ and then I remember fabric has its own issues of dyes bleeding and machines refusing to stitch and looping thread nests, and I’m like, all these are solvable problems. I have the expertise and the knowledge. I can fix things. So I did. I can’t say that I didn’t cry a little bit on the way home, but that’s more a Holy Shit Can the School Year Just Fucking End thing than desperation because of clay breaking or no sewing machine or no projector bulb or Please Pile More Shit on Me school crap.

Big deep breath. Today is a mess. Tomorrow is a semi-mess. I will do fabric-related things both days while trying to plan school crap. I have so many things that need to get done that are not happening. Friday I will put Her Weirdness back together and get her on a shelf. Then I get to start something new in clay. Which sounds nice. Maybe something less than 17″ tall so it will fit on a shelf. Good plan. Today is all the things. In the library. (with a knife? or a bulb?) Then union meeting, late pilates, dinner, work(?), then draw. Sounds nice when you get to the end.

This is too real…

They forgot 7. Draw random scribbles that don’t look like anything and then gaslight your teacher by proclaiming, ‘But that’s what I saw!’. Yeah.

I’m concerned about the baby owls. We definitely had two. We could see them in the hole of the box in the videos. Then there was a lot of screeching Monday night. Last night, I never heard a baby. There is video of mom or dad(?) dropping food off. Maybe mom is laying another egg and babies are quiet because she’s in there? Hopeful. Don’t remember any quiet nights in the last two years though. Hoping everything is OK. Last year, there was one, then it went quiet, and then it was about three weeks before we heard another one. And we found one skeleton in the box. So yeah. Hope on.