Remember…

Remember. Remember that school only started about two weeks ago. That you feel this exhausted every year for the first few weeks. That it kicks your butt. This might be why I write a blog…simply so I can go back to early September every single year and read, “I’m tired. I’m so tired.” And then I don’t feel so bad about it. It’s normal. For a teacher.

On top of that, I think I’ve developed an allergy to chapstick after all these years. Or something. I feel like I could sleep for the entire weekend. But I can’t.

So I have completed many tasks in the last 24 hours…sending photos for a show I’ll be in come January, trying to get new house insurance because the Auto Club doesn’t like me, paying this bill and that bill, making a label for and packing up a quilt that needs to ship today!, trying to find a cord online so I don’t have to buy it in a store, stupid shit. Grading papers at a stitching meeting because I need to get them done (I didn’t get them done yet). By the time I got home from the stitching meeting, I was exhausted again. Shocking really that doing a lab all day made me tired…OH MY, we all have one period, sometimes two, where Listening to Instructions just doesn’t happen…but the best was when a kid asked “How do you measure length?” 1. The same way you did yesterday. 2. Weren’t you listening yesterday? 3. What did you do yesterday? 4. I repeated instructions today. Were you listening? I think I got a tad frustrated with that class.

Our team has had to be hard on these kids. It makes us feel bad sometimes, but there are certain behaviors I won’t deal with and now is the time to crush them. They’re really elementary kids at heart…and this is 7th grade. So while I’m standing up front giving instructions, some tiny beast will be wandering up to me and standing right in front of me and wanting to ask a question. Um. What are you doing? Go sit down. I swear, I wonder sometimes what goes on in other classes. I suspect they are just like us and kids are just like dogs…they want to be in your space. They want your attention. They hate to wait. They do believe they are the most important person in the world and no one else exists. This behavior training is exhausting as well. Sit down. Raise your hand. Ask the people at your table. Look at the board/screen for instructions. What part of it do you not understand. Don’t say “I don’t get it.” I will just walk away. “Don’t get WHAT?!” Meditation. Yup. During passing periods. Already meeting about kids who are unable to read or write in 7th grade. Meanwhile, count your extra books, put your books in piles by period for the state government check on whether we have textbooks (which we can’t check out to kids because the state hasn’t checked up on us yet), then we give you two new kids and you have to find them books, and how many headphones do you have? Tell me by Friday. Tell me the number of extra books by Thursday AM, but 10 minutes later you need two of them.

Sorry. Ranting. I have no one to talk to most of the time. That’s kinda sinking in as well. When I’m buried in work/art, it’s easier not to think about it, but last night, it was not easy to not think about it. My brain says, “Hey walk down the hall and check on a kid, just say hi.” “There is no kid.” “What? No kid? When will they be back?” “Almost 4 months. Shut up.” So that’s going well. I’m sure it will get easier. But not before it gets harder.

After a day like that, even though I had an enjoyable coupla hours with Julie, I was not ready and willing to sew, but I knew I had to. I wanted the legs done last night…and that didn’t happen. I got the second leg done down to the first…

I really am so close to done on this part of the sewing…

That’s it. That’s all there is. Here’s the purples already laid out for that last leggy bit (that was at 11:45 PM)…

For tonight’s sewing excursion.

Then I’ve gone through what happens next about 100 times in my head and I’m not sure exactly what will happen, but I’m not pinbasting anything. I do still want to add some stuff on top, and I don’t think it would take much time, but I’ve basically told myself it has to happen tonight. AND I have to trim it to size tonight, which won’t be easy either. All that after an exhausting week. Then tomorrow…spray baste to batting, cut a backing, sew it on, flip the fucker, iron it, maybe stitch it a bit. Have to remember to insert tabs so I can hang it up. Install is Monday. House is still a mess. Brain is a mess. Woo hoo! Incredibly behind on grading. Haven’t put any grades in the computer at all. Could be a shocker for the kids…

Anyway. Wish me luck. I’m really wanting to be done with this one and back on the other one. Although I really really have to finish the commissioned boob first. It won’t take long. I’m hoping to get it done by the end of the weekend. I’m hoping to get some sleep too though, so we’ll see how all that goes.